A Tribute

August 4th, 2008 @ 12:21 pm by Mrs. Canary

At the wedding, we wanted a subtle but meaningful way to honor my uncle, who had passed away a few months ago. I asked our florist for some ideas and he suggested a photograph with rose petals or a small votive candle. I was against the photograph because I thought it may be too morbid and shrine-like and also get people very emotional upon seeing an image of my uncle. I also wanted the item to be placed in lieu of his place setting where he would have sat.

In the end, I decided to make it myself– which helped me positively cope with the fact that he would not be present at the wedding. Instead of a photo or flower arrangement, I decided to create a votive arrangement that would include his favorite color: light blue. I purchased all the supplies at Michael’s.

In the candle holder department, Michael’s has a great selection. Most designs were priced from $5-$15. I settled on a two part holder that would allow me to fill the base with some decorative detail and a separate holder for the candle, which would make it easier to transport and be less susceptible to breakage during transport. I also purchased milky white glass “stones” to fill the base and some dark blue satin ribbon to attach a card with text.

I printed the card with the following text: “In Memory of Uncle Canary, Beloved Husband, Brother, and Uncle” and adhered it to dark blue card stock. I attached the card onto the ribbon and then onto the vase with glue dots.

Here is the final piece:

I know it meant a lot to both my aunt and Mama Canary to have the arrangement lit and placed at his table. It was a gentle reminder of his presence and spirit in all aspects of our lives, particularly at one of the most important events of my life.

Additionally, we included a small “In Memory” blurb in our programs to honor all the other family members who could not be with us.

How will you include loved ones who have passed away at your wedding?

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10 Responses to “A Tribute”

Guest

mandoo

That’s a very simple and touching tribute that speaks volumes. Thanks for sharing.

8/4/08 @ 12:26 pm (reply)

Member

AprylHzle (message) 54 posts, Worker bee

At our wedding there were 3 people we wanted to recognize, my father, my Hubby’s “surrogate father” (1 of his BF’s dad) and my Hubby’s “surrogate mom” (another BF’s mom). We were going to do the pictures as well and some sort of “shrine” but decided against it.

Instead after the MOH and BM speeches, my Hub gave a very emotional Thank You to all our guests in attendance and to those who were no longer with us.

8/4/08 @ 12:30 pm (reply)

Guest

beanchar

What a lovely tribute.

8/4/08 @ 12:37 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Cookie (message) 784 posts, Busy bee

What a beautiful way of paying tribute to your uncle!

Mr. Cookie and I are putting a little blurb in the program. Also, we are placing photos of those who are not with us, along with a candle to represent them, on our guest book table.

8/4/08 @ 12:38 pm (reply)

Guest

Sarah

We did use photos for my parents on their seats, but in order to avoid the “shrine” vibe, they were just some fun snapshots from their wedding (her looking scandalized as he roots around for her garter; him triumphantly holding the garter above his head).

My aunt–now my closest living relative–was afraid to sit behind the pictures (having not seen them) because she assumed they’d just set her crying, but when she got up the nerve to look at them later, she thought they were great.

8/4/08 @ 12:50 pm (reply)

Guest

Leslie

We had an white candle set up on the table with our sand ceremony stuff and we included a blurb in the back of our program. The candle was actually lit for two reasons: in honor of my oldest brother, who couldn’t be there as he was in training for his second deployment to Iraq and of my DH’s great grandmother who couldn’t travel due to her health and in memory of my dad’s parents and my DH’s dad’s mother, who had all passed away many years ago.

8/4/08 @ 2:00 pm (reply)

Guest

Corey

My father had passed away the year before our wedding and my father in law died the month before our wedding so we both wanted to do something but nothing horribly morbid.

We ended up having our officiant say an Irish Blessing for the both of them and it was perfect and beautiful. Especially with my father in law’s death so recent, something needed to be said (oh and my MIL pretty much demanded it…). We also had their pictures by the guestbook. No candles or flowers, just them. I also had something in our programs for not only our fathers but my Mom and my brother as well.

I also had a photo charm bracelet that I made and I had pics of my family that is no longer with us on it. It was perfect.

8/4/08 @ 2:33 pm (reply)

Member

mlindsey (message) 349 posts, Helper bee

That was a really nice tribute to your uncle. To honor my FIL, our daughter placed a rose where he would have sat.

8/4/08 @ 6:10 pm (reply)

Guest

LittleMissBride

That’s a lovely tribute to your uncle, and I think it’s great how you made it special and meaningful by doing it yourself.

For my mom, who passed away unexpectedly in November, I carried her photo in a bouquet charm. My dad also decided to carry her photo with him as we walked down the aisle- unbeknown to me - but it was a beautiful gesture. We mentioned her in the program, and I had flowers for her by the altar, which the next day I brought to her graveside. Finally, my husband gave a speech at the dinner, and he mentioned my mom and we all toasted to her. It was beautiful and touching. I have pics in my bio of several of those items.

8/6/08 @ 3:11 pm (reply)

10.

Guest

Miss X

We are having a floral arrangement made for the church with 5 lillies, one for each of our deceased grandparents. We will also have a blurb in our programs.

8/10/08 @ 4:41 am (reply)