The Packet.
August 7th, 2008 @ 5:45 pm by Mrs. Daffodil
Edit: Thanks for the enthusiastic response! As promised, here is a sample of our wedding weekend packet, tailored just for the hive!
Daffodil’s Wedding Weekend Packet Template
I wanted to add that after my original post, several people who had helped out with our wedding called me to let me know that, indeed, the packet had been extremely helpful and was really key to our uber smooth wedding day…which made me super happy to hear of course! And above is a pic to prove it! 
So hopefully, this (or something similar) will come in handy on your wedding day too!
Thanks for your patience as I made all the edits. Happy planning!
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It became a bit of a running joke among all involved in helping out on our wedding day. I admit maybe it was a bit over the top, but for a J-personality type* like me, but hey, it was as much for my own sanity as it was for helping everyone else know where to be and when. That’s right- I created a 15-page “Wedding Weekend Packet” for all involved! It took me probably a full three days straight (with little sleep) to really get everything right, but I did it and sent it out to everyone about four days before the wedding!
Now what could possibly take up 15 pages you ask? Here’s a glimpse into my pride and joy…
We began with a cover letter introducing the packet to our friends and family. The contents were as follows:
- Logistics overview
- Overview of weekend events
- Detailed wedding day schedule
- Map, directions, and travel
- Contact list
- Description of roles
The Logistics Overview. A list of key wedding day contacts (aka people to call if you have absolutely no clue what is going on), key locations and their addresses, and a list of the key events taking place over the course of the week.
Overview of Weekend Events. A three-page list of all the key events taking place over the next few days, including a pre-wedding family celebration dinner, our rehearsal, our rehearsal dinner, and more, all the way through to our afterparty. Under each event, I provided the date and time, location, point person(s) to contact, who was required to attend, and a brief description of the event.
Detailed Wedding Day Schedule. This was probably what may have been a little overwhelming for some at first, but I sincerely believe it was the reason why our wedding day went so incredibly smoothly! It was a two-page schedule listing the main activities, underneath which we broke out specific activities by 15-minute increments. It listed each activity next to the time and the parties involved. Here’s a glimpse…
Map, Directions, and Travel. Pretty self-explanatory. This was a two-page section that included a map of LA (which I created using Wedding Mapper and then just taking a screen-shot of the image), directions from the airport to the hotel, hotel to the church, church to the rehearsal dinner site, and the church to the reception site. We also included travel tips for our out-of-town guests, including travel options and approximate rates.
Contact List. A full contact list of about 50 people, including their names, phone numbers, emails, and role of each person involved in helping out with the wedding.
Description of Roles. This section was five pages long, the longest section. It was for a good reason though, as we detailed out the specific responsibilities of different people involved, preempting any last minute wedding day confusion. We included what activities they needed to be present for, what time to arrive, and what they were on point for. Of course, people didn’t have to read all five pages - All they had to do was jump to their section (i.e. bridesmaids, or scripture readers, or attendants, etc.). Again, another key reason why our wedding day ran so smoothly! A huge thanks to Mr. D for helping me with this section and with the contact list…This seriously took me forever.
That about sums up “The Packet”! I wanted to post up the template, but it has way too much personal information in there right now, with names and phone numbers of people everywhere.
But yeah, this was what we sent to our friends and families (vendors got something different, which I will share in a future post!). You wouldn’t believe how much crap I got from some people 
, ranging from our friends jokingly saying every time “Well, let me refer to my 15-page wedding packet…” all the way to some adults (who will remain nameless) saying “What a waste of time…who would ever read 15 pages!”
In the end, I do hope everyone appreciated it! But if nothing else, going through the process of creating this at least gave me peace of mind, allowing me to relax and enjoy my own wedding day…which was reason enough for me! 
*I am referring to the Myers-Briggs personality types. A “J” personality tends to approach the world with a plan, prefers to be organized and prepared, and has a tendency toward closure and completion (as opposed to taking a more adaptive go-with-the-flow approach). If you get a strange sense of joy in crossing items off your to-do lists, creating itineraries and schedules, etc., you are probably a “J” personality type too 
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70 Responses to “The Packet.”
I love it. “Logistics Overview”….
Oh it’s so comforting to see that another crazy, OCD, J did this too!!! It really made me mad when people didn’t read the information I spent so much time putting together so that they wouldn’t have to ask a million questions. Most of my friends knew not to make fun of me too much. If someone had called it a waste of time and said that no one would read it, I’d have probably pinched their heads off and banned them from the celebration. 
You beat me by one page! I had a fourteen page “Masterplan” I don’t know how much it helped other people, but I started putting it together a month before the wedding and it wound up helping me figure out the gaps in my planning. Good job!
sweet jesus.
I second bonniebelle101! It’s great that there is someone else out there that I know shared my madness! I too had a “wedding packet” that I gave out to my bridal party and I too got made fun of for it. However, similar to your situation, my wedding ran extremely smoothly so I got the last laugh.
I bow down to your OCD awesomeness! I’m going to steal, no borrow this idea. KUDOS to you for all your hard work!
I got crap for my 1-page wedding weekend information page that I sent out to the bridal party! I’m in the process of putting together another section to it - dealing with who needs to be where and when, photos, etc. I’m sure I’ll catch even more for that. I love it!
Yeah I’m sorry to say that most people probably won’t look at all your hard work. I had a wedding timeline with key info (nothing long at all- 2 pages) and people were STILL calling me the day of asking me the very questions I had anticipated and already answered in their packets. In the end I said “before you call me again look at your timeline cause I’m not going to answer a question that I already answered there.” Yep bridezilla 100%
That is amazing…in kind of a scary way, but still amazing. My friends would just roll their eyes and be on their way. They’d save the comments for behind my back! :)You have very sweet friends for them to not give you a bit more crap for it. LOL I bet it did help though. It looks like a plan for declaring war.
Can I have the template too? b_ellingsworth@hotmail.com Thanks!
OMG I am totally doing the same thing- except might include an excel matrix timeline of duties. I love itineraries and charts, and always appreciate attention to detail! I am an ENTJ- what are your other categories?
OMG the mecca of planning timelines … I am totally doing this too. I’ve done a smaller version (but will do something exactly the same as this!) with colour coding and dress code descriptions.
I’m totally with you on this kind of obsessiveness - when you start relying on other people to follow in your well-laid plans, they need tons of details!
I swear, if ONE person asks me the day before the wedding what to wear to the rehearsal dinner, or what “business casual means”, I’ll have to scream “READ YOUR SCHEDULE!!” 
Ooh I love you for this! This is right up my alley!
It’s not scary at all - and it’s exactly what my wedding party is expecting of me. THAT is actually the scary part!
I am totally a “J” too! I can so see myself doing this on my wedding day too… as much as I say I want a super casual wedding. Haha.
look at you! you are awesome. i’m in the process of doing mine… i have 10 so far and i thought that might be pushing it a bit…..
fantastic job though. i’d love a copy of the template too! anniechenvln@gmail.com
thanks for being a j personality!
I used to be an event coordinator and (while I totally admire your organizational techniques- just brilliant!) that long of a document is just not for me.
Instead, I picked one person (a good friend that also used to be an event coordinator) and gave her ALL the information - the packet if you will. She was basically my day-of coordinator and took care of any small issues that cropped up.
The bridal party got a small (1 page) itinerary and all wedding invitations had a small map of key locations for out of town guests. (their welcome basket at the hotel also had a welcome card in it with few key times listed).
You’re right though, it does really help to get it all straight in your mind when you write it down and organize it!
Becky
I love it - if you share the template, I’d love a copy too. This is not scary - I’m sure it managed everyone’s expectations and cut down on surprises. (lilbooba@yahoo.com)
Oh if you can send the template or post a link on here that would be wonderful!
Samigfb@aol.com
please send me a copy of the template if it’s okay?
I would love the template, too …
angelapea_98@yahoo.com
Thank you so much, fabulous job!! I love it!
Your template is amazing! I’m sure the day of people would need to refer to it. I think its a great idea. I would love it if you sent me a template copy too. My email is taurus5820@yahoo.com
may i have a copy of your template as well?
cxiaojie@gmail.com
thank you!!!
I would love the template as well brandi.fehrenkamp@cmc.com.
Hee hee…I’m an ENFJ…http://www.weddingbee.com/2007/09/04/organizing-the-tables/
can you tell?
i’ll try to get around to cleaning it up or if i have time, maybe creating a blank template that i can send or post up. it might take a while tho, just warning!
@Becky: i got lucky b/c our cousin was our day-of-coordinator…so having her AND our packet made life so easy! believe it or not, over half of our wedding party and our attendants (including the guys) either carried it around or referred to it a lot, which was enough joy for me hahaa. it probably was more than they needed, but again, for my own sanity’s sake! 
whatever you need to help you let go!
@Mrs. Corn: oooh we’re almost the same! i am an INFJ, but borderline I and E!
i’d love a copy, too! msjudy206@hotmail.com you should think about making the wedding industry into a career for yourself, whether it’d be coordinating, creating invitations, or creative director, i’m sure you’d be successful!
This is just what I need to do! I’m a J-type personality also… and right now, I’m really freaking out not knowing what when who and where everything is going to take place… could you send me a copy of the template after you delete all the personal info? Thank You!!!
do you think you can e-mail me a copy of the roles sheet? at miheesong at hotmail dot com? Thanks for sharing what should be in a list, i need a lot of help in this area.
all the type J’s might appreciate this old video from The Office: http://www.nbc.com/The_Office/video/office_psa_invite.shtml#video
a “no-names/blank” template would be fabulous! love the organization…
if and when you get it up, my email is laughinlou82@yahoo.com… THANK YOU in advance
[...] The Packet by Mrs. Daffodil, Read More Right Here Mrs. Bee [...]
I would LOVE the template - this is amazing. I have been looking and looking for something like this! You can email me at gretchenlswift@yahoo.com. Thank you!!
Would you mind emailing me a copy of the template, as well as the timeline you sent your vendors? My wedding is on August 15, 2008 and this would be extremely helpful.
Diane
This packet is awesome, I wish I were that organized! If you could please send me a copy of the template, I would really appreciate it! I’m especially interested in the description of roles! Thanks soooo much! huckleberry12@yahoo.com
Fantastic! I’m definitely a ‘J’ type too (much to the dismay of my laid back bridal party!) I want to do something exactly like this for my wedding at the beginning of October. Would you mind sending along a template to me as well (lexidance00@hotmail.com) Thanks so much in advance!!
I love your idea. I’ve been looking for something just like it. Can you send me your template? Thanks!
it scares me.
I hope you get hundreds of comments on this post because you really deserve it! I know you spent a lot of time making this an anonymous template, and WOW I cannot wait to use this. I know it will freak some of my guests out, but I never want there to be any question whatsoever where someone should be and at what time.
Don’t let those weirdos who think this is overkill make you think otherwise, this is one of the best resources Weddingbee has ever seen!
@BaghdadBride: I think thats more of a reflection of the era we live in than you being a bridezilla. People are lazy - they want everything done for them.. they don’t want to READ for gods sake.
WOW!
I am the Wedding Planner at the Historic Boston Park Plaza Hotel and would like to thank you for creating such an artwork! I live for things like this. This will definitely help my brides have a seamless and perfect event. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing!! This will be such a big help to me!
this is great, but my friends and family would KILL ME if I handed them this. Maybe if I was having a weekend long wedding would i use a snippet of this. I will though totally steal from the day of schedule.
wow - this is insane. i agree with alison - if i gave my family this packet, they would totally kill me but there are definitely portions of it that i will steal.
thanks!
Thank You Mrs. Daffodil! I really wanted to put something like this together, but had NO IDEA where to start…..
Thank you so much for this! It’s wonderful, really. Thank you!
Thank you thank you thank you!
Hmm I don’t know.. the size of this and the amount of info in there stresses me out just looking at it. I think the best is just to make 2 pages - 1 with timeline of events (basic not down to every min.)
2 with contacts and addresses of key people. I am very visual so I need a lot of white space around all this and type arranged in such a way so it would simplify the readability.
I can’t even imagine my family try to follow this.. it would take me about 3 hours to explain this to 4 people. haha…
It is good to have a plan tho
As much as I like this it’s just too much to give someone who is not your wedding planner. The groomsmen are not going to read this and as a bridesmaid I would probably skim it and be too over-whelmed. Less is more.
love it. you are super fabulous girl. i just made a 16 paged packet this week with a crazy detailed timeline…yay obsessive compulsiveness!
Woooah. That is a bit scary. Oh wait… That’s my crazy wife!! -_-
wow…you’re amazing. Can I please get the template??
Lsusan830@yahoo.com. Thanks so much!!
Love love LOVE this post! I think this was a fantastic idea!
I just read through the comments again and I wanted to reiterate once more, Daffodil, this isn’t over the top! I don’t understand why people feel the need to get on here and comment to tell you they think it is crazy. If you think it’s crazy, just don’t use it okay?
Other than Mr. Daffodil. He can call you crazy all he wants
@Miss Avocado: avocado, you are seriously the sweetest!! thanks for being so awesome and supportive!
and thanks to all the rest of you who wrote sweet comments as well! i really hope it will prove helpful!
I don’t think its a REQUIREMENT that people read it…its more of a reference point for everyone involved and I think its much appreciated and saves a lot of extra phone calls, right? Hmm…what should I be doing right now…Maybe I’ll check the packet! I mean, its not required reading, its just a “if you don’t know, now you know” kind of thing to me. I think it’s great, Daff!
mrs. d for some reason I cannot open/save your link to the fab. packet you made!!! is there anyway that you can send it to me!? jessica.froshaug@gmail.com
Daffodil, your packet is seriously awesome. Planning a wedding from a distance, with bridesmaids and groomsmen everywhere, and everyone not knowing the details, it’s better to have too much info than too little! I don’t want my cell phone going off all night!
I’m using it right now as an awesome template, and revising it to fit my needs (i.e. no rehearsal dinner, so I can remove that part, etc.)
i am in love with the packet (and your timeline from a while ago too!!!). thank you for sharing!
This is AMAZING!!! I can’t wait to see what you made up for the venders. Could you post the vendors “packet” template as well… again just a FABULOUS job!
Ha, I am commenting on this post a 3rd time because I am filling mine out right now and I can’t believe how reassured it makes me feel! It is forcing me to work out all of the minor details, and figure out who is doing what, and even if no one other than my mom, DOC, and my photographer pay attention to it it will all be worth it because I can say “Oh, you have a question, guess you should have read your packet huh?”
Can you tell wedding planning is making me kind of snarky
Don’t worry, I’ll probably comment one last time when I am done with it. It’s beyond fabulous. No YOU are beyond fabulous!
Here I am back again, commenting about my packet. Mine ended up being 19 pages, and I accidentally left in one of your addresses so people were asking me why one of the events was listed as being in LA No one got confused though and it is STILL the thing everyone is talking about. One of my bridesmaids told me she wants to hire me to make one for her someday!
So thank you thank you thank you!
i tried to open this file today, and it said it was corrupt. is there anyway it can be looked at?
Mrs. Daffodil, San Francisco/Los Angeles
Age and Occupation: 26, Nonprofit Strategy Consultant
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Resident Physician
Engagement Date: December 29, 2006
Wedding Date: May, 2008
Blogging Since: August, 2007
Venue: Church w/ floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the Valley; Westin in downtown LA
About Me: I moved around a lot growing up, but consider myself a Southerner at heart. I love scrapbooking, dancing, doggies, and diet coke. I am all about personalizing everything and hence, I'm a DIY bride who is just loving the entire wedding planning process! Mr. Daffodil and I met in our college fellowship group and were "just friends" for three years before we started dating. We've been together for four years now and can't wait to get married in sunny SoCal, Mr. Daffodil's hometown.
Oh my goodness this is great. can you send me the template when available so i can look at it more closely to see what details you put in?
thanks for posting about this
I think everyone coming to your wedding is going to know where and when to be thanks to your organization.
akline@nationaltransformer.com