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I’m going to turn to the only people that could possible have any fathom of an answer for me. We are having 82 guests, and an hour between the ceremony and the dinner (all at the same location). Right now our hors d’oeuvres menu looks like this, which includes fancy ones and platters, but I’m wondering if it’s overkill. I have no concept of what 82 people could eat in an hour, and afterward we are having a buffet dinner…
And yes, the prices are expensive because we are forced to use the most expensive caterer in the city due to its exclusivity contract with the venue.
Just how many hors d’oeuvres do we need? What would you do?
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That seems like a lot of food considering you are ahving dinner afterward.
I think the 5 passed platters would be plenty.
Caould you do those and then maybe a fruit and cheese spread which is light?
I would worry that everyone would get too full before dinner started. They will probably be drinking too which can fill you up.
I’m no expert but that seems like a ton of food for the hour right before dinner. Are you planning on keeping the platters out all night so people can snack on them later?
If it’s just for cocktail hour, I would think that four of five pieces each would be enough to tide them over to the actual meal.
That does sound like a lot of food. I wouldn’t get rid of all of the platters though. As a guest at several weddings recently where the passed platters were few and far between and/or the dinner was much later than the last meal we had before the wedding, I think it’s better to err on the side of platters than to just do passed. Do you have to do one of each of the five listed platters or could you just do two each of the first two listed and pick two or three of the passed kind?
overkill… tasty but overkill. You only need 4 appetizer options, whether buffet or passed. Maybe 2 each? If that seems sparse, get another buffet one that is cheaper but gives you another “decor” piece for the room
I would definately go on the lighter side. I had the same dilemma. I planned to have way too much food for the cocktail hour and you’d be surprised at just how fast that hour goes by. I would cut way back on the hors’d'oeuvres if I were you. You’re having a buffet, so you don’t need to pay all that extra money to fill your guests up BEFORE they get to the buffet! I would pick two, three of the selections at the most. You just want them to gnosh a bit while they’re drinking and mingling because again, that hour is going to go by fast!
I went to a wedding recently like this. There was so much good food during the cocktail hour that were stuffed by the time the (seated) dinner came around. Seriously, people were getting drowsy at the dinner table- eeps! Maybe have two platters out and then 2-3 passed hors d’oeuvres, or one platter and 3-4 passed? That would still be plenty!
Okay, I didn’t read all of the options and misunderstood…but that’s still A LOT of appetizers..Before I said two or three, but two or three of the set out platters and two of the passed should be plenty.
Seems like too much to me too. I’d do 4 or 5 passed items plus two of the platters.
go light! we also had a buffet for 150 people and ended up getting 3 x 100 piece platters of chicken satay and one other item (i forget what). that averages 2 pieces per guest. our guests ended up lingering around the ceremony area for a bit before heading to the cocktail area so our cocktail “hour” ended up only being about 30-40 minutes.
I’d pick 2, maybe 3 of the stationary trays and 3 passed hors d’oeurves.
Although, I don’t think any guest has ever complained that there was too much food during the cocktail hour…. Depending on the time of your wedding, most people have missed a meal by the time they get to the cocktail hour.
I would say that is a TON of food. I might pick only 2 stationary trays (focusing on fruits and cheeses and meats and veggies) and have more passed snacks. There is something very elegant about having things passed around in a butlered service, plus it keeps people from having to hover near the stations. I would say 4-5 passed (and you probably don’t have to order enough for each person to have 1, but you could) and 2 stationary.
Yeah that is a ton of food. I thought that was the entire dinner menu and then some!
my opinion seems a lot different than everyone else, but I think that 1 platter and 2 passed items (or 2 platters and 1 passed item) is plenty! if you have lots of food during the cocktail hour your guests may think that dinner will be light, and will stock up on hors d’oeurves! plus, your wedding guests and mine may differ, but i’m expecting most of the them to be more concerned about the cocktail part of the cocktail hour and not the food! 
wow that is a lot of tasty goodness! if all the guests ate the expected portions, i’d be surprised if any had room left for dinner, let alone dessert! you can probably safely cut back to 2 platters and 3 passed items. seriously. pick what you like the best (either passed or plated), then make sure it’s balanced among cold/hot, meat, veg, heavy/light. when dinner is being served following a cocktail hour, hors d’oeuvres should whet the appetite/tide people over not stuff them sily. as a guest, i’d have a hard time holding back from all that delicious temptation!
I’m not an expert, but Martha Stewart seems to be and she says that you should have 6-7 appetizers per person for an hour of cocktails. I think it probably also depends on the time of day and the size of the appetizers. Will your guests likely be starving because you’re having a twilight wedding with a bunch of first dances and toasts before dinner? If so, or if the appetizers are one bite a piece, then maybe it’s not too extreme. I’d only cut a platter or two.
Way overkill. Sorry, you asked 
That is what we are having for dinner!!!
I would cut it back to maybe one or two and forgo the passed all together.
Waaay too much! An hour flies by and a lot of the time is spent talking to other guests and sipping cocktails. Plus people know theres dinner coming up so they will not go nuts at cocktail hour.
I would just go with 3-4 different passed items. Enough for each person to have around 4-5 nibbles.
I have to diagree with most of the above comments. It is a ton of food but the cocktail hour is the best part!! I believe that the cocktail hour is where you make your first impression of the reception. Also, when I go to a wedding I usually don’t eat most of the day before I attend the wedding. So by the time cocktail hour rolls around I am starving. Remember also that diner usually isn’t served right away, there is time between cocktail hour and diner (intos., special dances). I think if anything keep the passed hor Ds and only eliminate 1-2 platters. Just my opinion!
Wait, you’re having all of that AND a buffet dinner?
Way too much food. If I saw those platters lying out on the table, I’d think that WAS the buffet, and would probably feel ill when faced with the concept of eating again within the hour (I know it’s only one platter per menu, but each one sounds like a lot).
The point of the cocktail hour is to chat to friends, have a glass or two of champagne/wine, and a couple of nibbles. I really don’t think anyone’s going to go hungry … it could only be a few minutes between when they have their last hors d-ouevre and when the dinner starts.
I think it really depends on where you are located. In the NY/NJ area this type of cocktail is the norm and is honestly standard/expected. Yes it’s technically overkill and a lot of food but everyone’s favorite part of the wedding is always the food at the cocktail hour! Think about what is that standard in your area. My cocktail hour menu is pages long…
That is too much food in my opinion. My friend has a wedding of around 180, she is having 4 passed and 1 tray. People wait in line for cocktails, and mingle and take photos. An hour goes by fast. I’ve recently been to a wedding with 250 people, 3 passed, and 3 stationary appetizers 2 of those were fruit and cheese. Both of these weddings were not buffet either. I would cut them down girl, don’t feel pressured to get all those, you have a buffet for them to get their grub on!
Everything sounds delicious! I’m sure it will be great no matter what you decide to do. But if I were you, I would just go with the passed hors d’oeuvres. I think it’s easier and people mingle better when the food comes to them instead of them going to the food (the platters).
I went with the Martha recomendation (~6 pieces per person per hour) for appetizers for both our RD and the reception. At both events, there was very little food left over.
It does depend, obviously, on the size of the portions, the time of day, and whether or not you are serving alcohol. For both our RD and our reception, the cocktail hour started at about 5:30, with a full hour before dinner was served. and dinner in multiple courses, so that the first course was salad. So people have been drinking for about 90 minutes before they get their entree. We were quite concerned that there be an appropriate amount of food considering the alcohol consumption (I would describe our guests as moderate drinkers, but it was a pretty warm day, so you know that the first cold drink can go down pretty quickly).
We limited our appetizers to 4 choices, of which we ordered essentially 1.5 servings per guest (so for 100 guests, 150 pieces). We did this because we figured it allows for the guests who take more than one serving while still giving everyone a reasonable chance of getting at least one of everything. It’s always annoying when half your guests are talking about how really great the crabcakes were - and half your guests didn’t get one. If you have too many choices, that’s how it ends up.
Based on that logic, IMO you have way too many choices. I would narrow it down to 4 - 5 selections total. With only ~80 people, you could easily have all passed appetizers and no stations. In fact, if you are passing appetizers, I would actually not have stations, as some guests won’t figure out they actually exist, or will figure that since some of the food is being passed, it will all eventually come around on a tray.
My hotel has a standard “cocktail hour” package which includes three passed appetizers plus optional trays. We’re just doing the three passed. I think your menu is a little overkill. Spend that money elsewhere.
I think that would only be appropriate if you were having a cocktail hour reception instead of a full dinner. You really only need half of that. I would say, 3 of the passed hors d’oeuvres and 1 or 2 of the platters, max.
My wedding was 84 people and we had three passed platters. I would say that your caterer’s calculation of 4-5 appetizers per person is about right — but I’d include the buffet stuff in that. That said, I do love appetizers, so my personal choice would be either three passed platters and a buffet item, two of each, or *maybe* depending on how you want the space to look, three buffet items and two passed platters.
i’m with the majority. that’s a Whole Lot of food. i would pick one of those two options, both seems like alot of people won’t be eating dinner. maybe you can mix and match your favorites from each section?
about 5 pieces per person seems like plenty to eat in an hour. most people will eat 2 or 3 right away and then stand and around and chat and drink… maybe nibbling on another piece or two before dinner.
it all sounds delicious though!
We are having a one hour cocktail hour followed by dinner for 80 people. Our caterer suggested 3-4 “bites” per person. We chose 2 appetizers to be tray passed with 2 “servings” per person of each choice. We ordered a total of 200 appetizers - to give a little leway(sp) and are having one of each placed at the head table (I hate being in the wedding party and missing appetizers for pictures!).
Way too much food. People are going to fill up on appetizers or they won’t eat them because they are saving room for dinner. Seems like I’m with the majority on this one. Great choices, but I’d totally have either passed or platters - or less of each.
I’m really hungry right now so keep that in mind, but I would do three passed appetizers (platters) and two stations. It gives you enough variety and looks bountiful without it being overkill. For the platters I would maybe do like 120 of each food.
I would tell you that it all depends on your priorities. If having amazing food at your wedding is important to you, then I think you should go with all of those choices. It’s very much aligned with “industry suggested” servings for a cocktail hour, but I think 2 or 3 of those platters are the difference between need-to-have and nice-to-have. You don’t need all of that, but it’s not complete overkill. So spend according to what you want for your wedding.
I think that is way too much food. The problem is that your guests are going to fill up on all the appetizers and then waste half the (probably expensive) dinner afterwards.
2 or 3 options of each should be plentyyyy. Cocktail hour goes by fast anyway. By the time everyone gets a plate and a drink and mingles for 10 minutes, they’re being ushered into the reception area.
Aha - my FI and I are getting married at the same venue as you and Mr. Milkshake. We are having about 130 guests, ceremony start time at 3:30pm, cocktail hour 4pm-5:30, Chinese tea ceremony and then a buffet dinner starting thereafter (approximate times)
We are planning on having 4 passed hors d’oeuvres during the cocktail hour, a buffet dinner, cake and a dessert bar.
Guests would have (or at least should have) had some lunch before coming to the ceremony so I think that you have an over generous amount of food for your guests. It would be a shame if your guests don’t eat the buffet because, as you mentioned, the caterer is not the cheapest one in town.
btw - that’s great that you got the cost breakdown of the food items. Our rep hasn’t been as forthcoming with the price breakdown. I think I’ll have to be more insistent on that front.
Ms. Milkshake I’m going to support your glutenous decisions! I went to a wedding recently with a tremendous cocktail hour with a three course dinner that followed, and honestly, it was AWESOME bc I was able to fill up on the food that I like rather than the three selections that were made by the bride and groom for appetizer/dinner options/dessert. GO BIG OR GO HOME!
and if you’re concerned its too much food - invite me - my love and I will help ya clean it all up
I also think that this is way overkill. I think you should nix the platters all together and just do the 5 passed. That will still provide a variety, and plenty for an hour reception. An hour is not very long, and I’m sure your buffet will be substantial.
The items looked great and if that was the only food at the reception, it would be generous! As a cocktail hour “snack” it does seem a little excessive…
I would do maybe the antipasto platter, the seafood platter and maybe the goat cheese torte and then the passed chicken and mini burgers. Or, some sort of combination which covers the vegetarians, along with some seafood, chicken and red meat. Maybe 2-3 platters and 2-3 passed hors d’oeuvres that offer a nice variety but don’t over-stuff your guests before the main meal.
And, it’s very easy to overdo the aps in the cocktail hour — we did
I have heard that doing 4-6 hors d’oeuvres per person is a good way to do it during cocktail hour if you are having a dinner afterward.
Also keep in mind that this is a small pre dinner snack and you don’t want to choose anything too heavy. I feel the same way you do about appetizers, but remember you want them to eat the great dinner you paid for. When we chose our hor d’oervres we based it on the decision of 4-5 per person per hour. good luck!
My daughter wants a wedding reception with milkshake! What type of menu will I need with the milkshake.
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Mrs. Milkshake, Seattle/Vancouver, BC
Age and Occupation: 23, Pharmacist
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Pharmacist
Engagement Date: May 2007
Wedding Date: August 2008
Blogging Since: December 6, 2007
Venue: Victorian Mansion
About Me: Despite the fact that I’ve invested many long years of my life studying the sciences in college, I’m glad to be out of there and I would never do it again! I’m super artsy at heart - I run an indie craft site, I grew up shooting and developing my own film, doing jazz and ballet, and the whole gamut of art classes. I’ve been called a Jane of all Trades… but I was also told many years ago not to make my passion my career because it’d suck the fun out of it. Hence my choice of day job. We live in Seattle but are having our wedding in Canada to be fair to all our family and friends.
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