Wedding Blog
The other day as I was walking down the street, some guy fell in step beside me.
“Hello,” he said.
I looked over at him, expecting to see someone I knew. Nope, didn’t know him.
“Uh, hi.”
“Beautiful day!” he said.
“Um, yup,” I replied.
And then, rather than leaving me to continue along my merry way, he kept walking beside me, chatting about the weather, working downtown and more about what a beautiful day it was (true! it was endearing and funny). He was kind of nervous and just, I don’t know, strange which caused me to wonder…
Is he… he can’t be… is he… flirting with me?
My mind racing, I thought to myself, what do I do? Ok, deep breath, no need to panic - I’ll just switch my bag from one hand to the other and flip my hair a couple times and scratch my nose and a couple other ‘yoo-hoo-please-notice-my-ring-and-save-us-both-from-this-awkward-moment’ moves I have up my sleeves.
So I did the routine. And it worked!
At least, I thought it did, until he passed me his business card.
D’oh!!
Luckily he was quite nice so I just smiled and said thanks and that was that.
The guy was honestly so polite, the only thing I can think of is that he simply didn’t think to look to see if I was wearing a ring. A simple mistake.
This little morning episode made me realize something: although having someone flirt with you is (obviously) incredibly flattering, when you’re engaged, it’s also flustering! Or rather, “fluster-ring”. (Ha ha, I slay me.)
It was also a reality check: Earth to Sea Breeze! Not everyone out there lists “checking out left hands to see wedding rings” as a favorite pastime like you do. (What can I say? I LOVE admiring people’s bling!)
Speaking of rings, here’s mine.
Top image by Duane Storey, taken the day I came to the office wearing my new ring… as you can see, I’m a blusher!
Anyone else a chronic ring checker-outter like me? Do you also have to remind yourself that not everyone has their personal radars scanning the peripheries 24/7 for all things wedding-related?
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Share this post: A Fluster-ring Morning
ha ha. I love the flinging the hair, check out my ring move. I have totally done that when I feel like someone is unaware that I am engagaed/married. And why wouldn’t they flirt with us, we’re beautiful. Its weird cause while I should feel flattered and instead I felt a little strange. Its time to start embracing it as a compliment again. And as for the ring checking? I never did that until I got enagaged. Now I am married and I check out left hands all the time.
I always check out women’s hands, before I was married I did that too. But now that DH is wearing a ring (which I love) I noticed guy’s hands more. Like the guy who helped us at our bank. I immediately looked at his hand and saw no ring and was like “Awww, he isn’t married, poor guy” 
(Not in a patronizing way but more like he was missing the party).
Cause marriage is just one big party you know…;)
I am totally with you ! I always compliment on a ring I like! And I am constantly looking for them too! People must think that I am nuts! I am also with you on gettting hit on with my ring on! You cant miss it! It actually happened two days ago at work. I had a pt coming flirt like nobodys business i kept trying to flash my left hand finally he said I can see your engaged or married to bad yuor really hott! Vey flattering and uncomfortable at the same time!
I think many guys are less aware of such things. I check out ring fingers all the time, but my fiance never does. He always seems dumbfounded when I remark that someone we don’t know very well is married.
“How do you know that?”
Left hand. Duh
I look for rings constantly, and when I see a nice/big one I tend to gawk. One quick funny story about flashing my ring: I was with my fiance when he saw a guy friend from high school who was with a very pretty girl, presumably a significant other. This girl gave me the death stare thinking I was somehow going to steal her man even though I clearly was with my fiance! I made sure to do the subtle/not-so-subtle hair flip/nose scratch/shirt fix routine. Honey, trust me, I’m no threat.
I still don’t notice these things. And even though I’m excited to marry my fiancé, sometimes my ring feels like the Scarlet Letter. It’s weird to be so easily identified by people I don’t know as a certain type of person.
And I love harmless flirting. Actually now that I know it’s going nowhere, it’s more fun!
I was getting hit on in a bar a few weeks ago (this never happens, EVER, so I was flattered) but after nearly an hour, it was getting old. I was definitely doing the hair-flip, nose-scratch, even adjusting my ring blatantly in front of him until he finally asked, “So, would you like to go out sometime?” I said, “Thank you, but I’m engaged” and held up my left hand. He said, “Oh, I wondered what that ring was about…”
So yeah. Some guys just don’t get the ring hint.
Guilty as charged… I always look at the left hand. Your ring is beautiful!
Your ring is beautiful! I never know what to do when someone is flirting and don’t pick up on the e-ring.
I’m one of those who are oblivious to rings even when it’s flashing in front of my face. I don’t know why, but I never look at a guy/girl’s jewelry.
i’m so oblivious to this, but ms. mango is always pointing people out as engaged or not engaged.
Love your ring. I think it actually be the same as mine 
Is it a Diana? Love love love the simplicity. (But I’m obviously bias.)
This totally happened to me on a public bus in Chicago, less than two months after I got engaged to my now-husband. The guy flirting with me finally noticed the ring and was like, “Oh. He’s a lucky guy!” It was a funny moment.
My honey gets so embarrassed because I will always talk to someone about their ring. When did they get engaged, or when was their wedding, how beautiful it is, blah blah blah. He is so private, and I am out there for the whole world to talk to! haha
I definitely think that weddings bring us all together.
I think the reality of it is that some guys don’t care. I found myself in an awkward situation as well where I had to say I was engaged and his response was “well let me know if you change your mind?”
really?
I think the most awkward experience came when my gynecologist hit on me. I was very clearly wearing a ring! And think about why a lot of women go to the gynecologist. Hellooooo! Things were very awkward after that…icky!
I definitely enjoy checking out people’s engagement rings. The one thing to remember is that most people don’t look at your ring finger, especially guys. Even if they did, it still doesn’t stop them from flirting!!!
There’s a song I love by mc chris, this nerdcore rapper that i love, called “Check the Ring, Yo”. It’s quite amusing. I believe you can check it out on itunes/amazon.com.
@AlliCat: I love when I don’t proofread before posting. Strike an ‘I love’ from my comment
haha! I love this post! I definitely check out wedding rings, and I hope no one catches me checking out my own ring!
LOL! I had a similar moment the other day at the veterinarian’s office. Except that I am also sporting a wedding band…and I think the kid was in high school! Seriously, he was there with his mom. But he just started talking to me out of nowhere - I facing away from him, even - asking if I lived in the area, etc. Like you, it took me a minute to figure out what was going on. I tried to flash my rings, but what I really wanted to do was say, “Dude, I know I look young, but I am 28 and married!”
I never check, and I’ve never noticed. I’m glad other people do, but it doesn’t save me from getting hit on at the gym when I’m wearing lifting gloves!
I *definitely* stare at rings–I’m obsessed! Speaking of, you HAVE to tell us about yours–it’s gorgeous!!
This is great, I’ve had the same awkward moments. I work at a gym at the local university so the college guys get a little too friendly sometimes, I never know what to say!
I’m always looking at people’s rings though, more so once I got engaged I think.
Ditto - your ring is gorgeous!
I always check ppl ring fingers and I have for a very long time… my BFF would be like, “That guy is cute!.” and I’d say, “yeah to bad he’s taken.” Her - “How can you tell?” Me - “Hello the RING!”
@MrsDavis: I completely agree, time to take it as a compliment again, depending on the context of course.
@Smithie71 @Kara:Yeah, Mr Sea Breeze is equally blind when it comes to rings.
@ceciliap: I’m not sure, a private jeweler made it.
@AlliCat: Ha ha, don’t worry, we promise not to tease…
@avd: Aw, thanks. Well, I absolutely adore the diamond in it, some call it a cushion, others a radiant. All I know is it’s a square with slightly rounded corners - the best of both worlds! When I’m in a bad mood at work, I sometimes go for a ride in the elevator… the lights in there are AMAZING, they make it sparkle like mad (and then I’m cheered up, ha).
I too look at rings now ! LOL It’s like a game… I’ll see a couple and try to guess if they are engaged before I check the bling. LOL =)
I was hit on last week and it totally flustered me! I cal ed Fi right away and he laughed at me. Thing is- I think I was flirting back…I had no idea!
BEAUTIFUL ring darling Sea Breeze!
I’ve had a similar thing happen, but the dude was so dense that when he asked what I do for a living, I told him and then tacked on to the end, “Oh, and I am planning my wedding in my spare time.” It took him a second to recover, asked me when the date was and then managed to escape shortly thereafter. I was flattered…but not?
This happened to a friend of mine at our friend’s bachelorette party this summer. She’s really gorgeous and has always had guys come up and start flirting with her. This guy came over to her at the bar we were at and started talking to her for a really long time. She tried doing the look-at-my-ring maneuvers, too, but he wasn’t getting it. Then he asked, “Maybe we can hang out sometime?” And she held up her hand and said, “I don’t think so. I’m married.” I’m pretty sure he was drunk and just kind of wandered away. lol
And I also am always looking at people’s left hands!!
Aargh, I SO needed to do the ring manoeuvre the other week at work, but half the time I don’t wear my e-ring to work because my hands get so dirty and I keep bumping them, and I’m afraid for my pretty ring, so I leave it at home. This guy was totally hitting on me, and I didn’t even catch on until he said, “maybe we could have dinner sometime”. Well, he was about twenty years older than me and I thought he was just chatting while he paid for books! I just wished I could do the ring trick that day.
I am TOTALLY a “ring checker-outer!” I sit down on the subway and scan the room — I did it more when we first got engaged, but now I look for wedding rings too. I’m right there with ya!
bahaha! I’m another who never checked out rings until I got engaged.
I think I feel more free to enjoy the compliment of being flirted with since I know exactly where I stand being married, and “I’m happily married” is by far the easiest let down a guy can get. Before I got married, it was more flustering since it was usually unwanted and required deflecting.
@pancakes: ew! and definitely against professional ethics! I’d report him!
[...] other day I wrote on Weddingbee about how this random guy sort of hit on me while I was walking down the street to [...]
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Mrs. Sea Breeze, Vancouver/Dominican Republic
Age in 2008 and Occupation: 30, Communications Manager
Fiance's Age in 2008 and Occupation: 29, Experiential Marketing Director
Engagement Date: October 6, 2007
Wedding Date: November, 2008
Blogging Since: July 17, 2008
Venue: Majestic Colonial Resort, Punta Cana
About Me: Planning a destination wedding by the sea should be (oh no she di-in't…) a breeze (…*sigh* yep, she did) but when you've never been to the Caribbean, your powers of imagination are really put to the test. Luckily, I'm 90% resourceful, creative optimist (and kooky, neurotic practicalist-if-that's-a-word for the other ten). Other than writing about our week-long celebration of family, friends, laughter and love, I adore books, shoes and… you guessed it… long walks on the beach.
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