Weddingbee

With all this recent talk about wedding registries (Espresso, Champagne), I cannot help but to think of what I would have chose, if I had the power to create my own registry… which I didn’t. However, I provide you with: the Mango registry that never was.

My first stop would have been KB Toys. I know people would contend that Toys “R” Us is a better store for wedding toy registries (as if there was such a thing), but I feel that Toys “R” Us is a bit “bourgie”. I kind of like the fact that almost everything in KB is “buy 1, get 1 free”. Secondly, I’m a little scared of Geoffrey the Giraffe.

Source

Anyhow, I think the following would be floating somewhere on my registry:

(from left to right) Imaginext Adventures DC Super Friends-Batman, Mega X Morphibian , R/C Kimodo Dragon, Monopoly: Here & Now—Electronic Banking Edition
Sock’em Boppers Set, My First Stuffed Animal: Baby Pooh, Double Wave Rider Slip ’N Slide

Now some of these may confuse you, but I shall provide you with my rationale. What groom would not want a little Batman figurine?! It would make for an awesome desk toy at work, or even a first anniversary cake topper. There must be someone that sees eye to eye with me on this one. The remote control car needs no explanation. We, as men, need to be reminded of our youth, as most of us refuse to escape that phase of our lives mentally. The Monopoly game is a great gift that could be used on rainy days in front of the fireplace. One comment I have however, is what the heck is up with this electronic banking version? I couldn’t find any of the old school paper money ones *teardrop*.

Continuing on, the Sock’ Em Boppers set is for when Ms. Mango gets really mad at me for something like… forgetting to tell her that 15 guys are coming over to watch the game, so we can’t go to that romantic dinner I promised. This would be followed by her and I retreating to a private room in the house, me blowing up one of the sock’ em boppers, and her punching me in the face with it. See! Problem solved.

The stuffed animal is kind of cool because I think I would save that one for when we’d have a mini-Mango running around the house. It would be neat to have a present that showed we wanted a mini-Mango right from the start of our marriage (Hey! We grooms have hearts too!). Lastly, the Slip and Slide would be a great addition to the backyard… or the living room, until we can get it furnished. Those of you that have had the privilege of thrusting your body on one of these know exactly why I’d want one.

My second stop would have been Brookstone. I mean, who doesn’t need a completely weird doohickey, or collection of doohickies?

(from left to right) Vuzix iWear AV310
Talking wine charms, Cooljam pro

I think the Vuzix would be the first thing I’d add from the store. This is actually a neat gadget that allows you to project videos from your iPod to these neat little glasses. I think I would fulfill my lifelong goal to embarrass Ms. Mango till she faints, all while looking like a real life Star Trek character. Think of being on the way to your honeymoon on an eight-hour flight, and every time you turn to speak to your new hubby, you see that image.

Talking wine charms seems like a natural choice for a newlywed couple. You need things like this around the house for entertaining guests. Who wouldn’t want a wine charm to call your guests a “wine-oh” or inform people that “I’m a little tart!”.

Lastly, I’d also throw the “Cool Jam Pro” on the list. This is strictly to show off my “dunking” prowess with the aid of a 10,000 gallon pool, and the benefits of buoyancy.

To keep up with the digital age, I probably would have requested some items from collectionsetc. com. If you don’t know what CollectionsEtc is, it’s the company that sends out that little magazine that comes in the mail, with all the crazy mail order gifts. If you are wondering where it is in your house right now, check the sink next to the toilet. It’s probably the second most popular bathroom reading material aside from your newest Cosmo, InStyle, or US Weekly.

To be continued…

What percentage of the gifts on your registry was picked by you, and how much of it was picked by your significant other?

• Remember the Invite
• The Time of Our Lives: Fr...