Sign up   Login  
Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Bee
more by Mrs. Bee (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Bee
Mrs. Bee's Picture
Mrs. Bee, New York Age and Occupation: 29, Weddingbee Publisher Fiance's Age and Occupation: 33, Internet Engagement Date: May 7, 2004 Wedding Date: March 5, 2005 Venue: Westside Loft, New York About Me: Yes, my name really is Bee! I love my blogging, wikis, and tabasco sauce!
About Mrs. Bee

Rumors

October 5th, 2008 @ 10:46 pm by Mrs. Bee

I’ve seen a few rumors out there that are pretty disturbing.

Inter-racial matching

A few comments here and elsewhere said that eHarmony doesn’t offer inter-racial matching.

I was incredibly disturbed by this, so I called Stan to ask about it.  He confirmed that ethnicity and race has never played any role whatsoever in eHarmony’s matching system.  Never as in, never in the history of the company.

Each user on eHarmony can set their own racial preferences to whatever they want.  You can set it to match only people from your own race or ethnic background, or you can set it to match people from others as well.

Focus on the Family

Another rumor I saw is that eHarmony gives money (or has given money) to Focus on the Family.

Focus on the Family had a radio program where years ago, they profiled successful eHarmony matches.  eHarmony never paid any money to Focus on the family for this coverage.  Also, eHarmony has never donated any money to Focus on the Family.  Never, ever.

I see statements like, “[eHarmony] actively contributes to organizations that fight against the recognition of LGBT rights and commitments” and I am not sure how to respond!  eHarmony has never contributed any money to Focus on the Family, or bought any advertising from them.

I’m not trying to defend eHarmony.  I realize that some of you have opinions about the company that aren’t going to change no matter what.  That’s okay.  I just wanted to make sure that the facts are out there.

Weddingbee Editing

One final rumor sprung up just in the past few days.  I read on an outside blog that “the eHarmony PR team appears to be copy-editing comments on the WeddingBee blog.”

This is simply not true *sigh*.  I posted a comment on my earlier post clarifying this, but that outside blog posted their story just a few hours ago… so I guess a new rumor is on its way.

It sounds like this rumor started out as a misreading of one of our bloggers’ comments: “This post was a long time coming and had to be reviewed by eHarmony higher ups several times and was edited in several places.”

I’ve noticed that a few people have interpreted this comment as suggesting that eHarmony edited the posts. That was definitely not the case.

The posts by the Bees were not edited by eHarmony – only Mrs. Penguin and I edit Bee posts. I did personally work with each blogger to edit the posts, with any changes approved by each blogger.  The edits were to clarify confusing statements, and to make sure it was clear when something was opinion versus fact. They were very minor, and I would be glad to post the originals.  Mrs. Cream Puff preferred not to make any clarifying edits, so her post went up as is.

As for the posts taking a long time to be published, that’s definitely true.  eHarmony asked if they could prepare a response, so I sent them the posts so they could respond. It did take longer than I had hoped to get the response published, which contributed to the delay in getting this announcement up. I feel awful about the delay… :-(

Rumors

I know that rumors are a fact of life, and I don’t expect these rumors to go away.

I’ve had some bad experiences with rumors in the past myself.  When I was younger, I changed high schools when my family moved from LA to the suburbs.  I went on three innocent dates with a boy I met, and somehow the rumor got out that we had slept together.  Before I knew it, people were saying that I had had to move from my old school because I had to escape my “reputation”.  Other boys even told their friends that they had also slept with me.

In the two years I was there, those rumors never went away even though they weren’t true. :-( They didn’t go away until I left for college up north, in the Bay Area.

I wasn’t sure what to do then, and I am not sure what to do now.  All I can do is publish the facts, and hope that one day the truth gets out there.

Sincerely,
Bee

ps I’d like to ask that everyone treat each other with respect – both in the comments, and out there in the blogosphere!  I’ve seen some personal attacks in the comments, and also heard that some people have sent not-so-nice notes to Bees that have left.  Please don’t do that.

I ask that you treat each and every person – whether they be a blogger or a commenter – with dignity and respect.  I have not been deleting personal attacks like I would normally be doing, because I don’t want people to think that we are censoring comments.  But please be nice to each other!  I would greatly appreciate it. :)

Tags: announcements |
advertisement below
Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Bee
more by Mrs. Bee (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Bee

60 Responses to “Rumors”

1 2 3 

1.
Guest Icon
Guest
Katherine

Mrs. Bee,

I don’t know if it will make any difference, but I just wanted to reiterate, due to all of the negativity on your previous posts, that I have nothing but congratulations & respect for the hard work that you’ve put into this site & that you’ve been bussiness-savvy & passionate enough to turn your blog into what it is today.

I look forward to seeing how WeddingBee evolves & am sure that it will be for nothing but the better.

I also am very hopeful that LGBT brides and/or grooms will continue to apply for WB & become bees. I love the diversity that WB promotes.

Thank you for all of your har work & thanks also to all of the Bees that put so much time, effort, & thoughtfulness into your posts. It’s very much appreciated.

 
2.
Guest Icon
Guest
Paulo

Thank you bee…I’m sure the last several days have been tough. But it’s great to reiterate the “respect” part. Some people get so fired up about their own “opinions” that they forget that others have theirs as well.

It’s this pushing of opinions on others that keep the circle round. Pardon the cliche’s, but it’s a two way street, and it certainly takes two to tango…

Good for all you’ve done for the wedding industry. Weddingbee is a true inspiration and haven for great ideas! Congratulations.

 
3.
Guest Icon
Guest
alison

Thank you Bee for posting this. I hope that you are feeling better and are having a lovely time moving into your new place! I am sorry that this happy time has had some negative side effects but take comfort in the fact that you still have many, many readers and many more to come and enjoy Weddingbee past, present and future!

 
4.
Guest Icon
Guest
Sarah

I’m happy to hear that those rumors are not true. I wish that it were also untrue that eharmony didn’t reject lesbians and gays who also wanted to find love using their matching service.

 
5.
Guest Icon
Guest
Sarah

sorry… I wish it was untrue that eharmony does reject lesbians and gays who want to join.

 
6.
Guest Icon
Guest
Kenzie

I’m confused, didn’t Mrs. Cream Puff say that she’d written a goodbye post, and yet we haven’t seen it?

That’s a little concerning.

Aside from that, Bee, I thrilled for you, you’ve attained what many, many bloggers can only dream of! Congrats on the sale and here’s to a Weddingbee future that’s just as successful and loved as the past!

 
7.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Ant (message)  97 posts, Worker bee

I’m glad you cleared up some of the rumors. I did a thorough due diligence on eHarmony several years back and never learned anything about it discriminating against interracial matches. I was surprised to hear about it for the first time in the comments. Good to know what’s fact vs fiction.

I agree that Mrs Lovebug’s comments regarding the editing process was very confusing. I don’t think she meant to (at least I hope not), but her comment misled a lot of readers. Even I got confused. Thanks for clearing all this up.

 
8.
Mr. Bee
Bee
Mr. Bee (message)  4,409 posts, Honey bee

Hey Kenzie – Bee took the weekend off so no new posts have gone up since Friday. She’s been sick, and we had to move into a new apartment over the last few days. She posted yesterday about taking the weekend off – sorry for any confusion.

Mrs. Ant – That comment wasn’t from Mrs. Lovebug, and I’m sure it wasn’t meant to be confusing. It’s all good – we just wanted to clear up any misunderstandings.

 
9.
Guest Icon
Guest
Mrs X

Thanks for the clarifying post, Mrs. Bee. I hope you are feeling better, and the move went well. Congratulations, again, on your success, and I can’t wait to see what’s in store for WB!

 
10.
Guest Icon
Guest
PrettyInPink

Thanks for the clarification. I hope your move went well and I can’t wait for things to be back to business as usual.

Feel Better Mrs. Bee!

 
11.
Guest Icon
Guest
KLevi18

Sounds like someone is trying to protect their investment. Times are hard. I know.

 
12.
Guest Icon
Guest
linda

Mrs. Bee – thank you for the clarification. You have cleared up rumors that I took to be true, simply because I read them by random people’s ‘facts’ in the comments section. I know you to be honest, and I trust you had researched these comments. Also, Mrs. Ant’s comment above is also reassuring.

Thank yoU! I hope you feel better, and above all, congratulations! I will certainly be staying with wedding bee!

 
13.
Guest Icon
Guest
KLevi18

So, are you saying that prior to 2008, there was interracial matching with eHarmony? Hmm…I don’t think so.

 
14.
V
Member
V (message)  482 posts, Helper bee

Smart BUSINESS woman!
Congrats’s bee

 
15.
Guest Icon
Guest
Jason

Rumors hurt but I think Karma has a way of finding those that deserve it!

 
16.
Guest Icon
Guest
L

I met my husband in 2004 on eHarmony and we got married last year. And we are an interracial couple.

 
17.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Duckling (message)  1,415 posts, Bumble bee

Mrs. Bee~ Thanks for providing us with more information and clarifying. I didn’t think that some of those things were true, and I am glad to hear confirmation of that. I hope that you are feeling better and that the move went well. I can only imagine that this last week as probably been very crazy and emotional for you. Weddingbee is still one of my favorite websites to check each day and I appreciate all you are doing to keep it the special and wonderful hive that it is!

 
18.
Guest Icon
Guest
December

KLevi18 — Please provide substantial information on why you believe your position to be true before you add more unnecessary grist to the rumor mill.

 
19.
Mr. Bee
Bee
Mr. Bee (message)  4,409 posts, Honey bee

@KLevi18: In addition to L above, Panoramathon on the post about “Weddingbee and Marriage Equality” mentioned that while he or she disagreed with eHarmony’s matching policy, they “just want to clarify that [eHarmony] have and do match cross-racially. I actually met my fiance there and we are an inter-racial couple. We met there in 2004.”

I’m not sure where the rumor started that eHarmony just started interracial matching this year. There are a bunch of confirmed cases of interracial matches over the years in Google, and Bee has gotten confirmation from eHarmony management that they’ve offered interracial matching from the beginning.

That said, rumors are tough to stop once they’ve gotten started. If there’s anything we can do to convince you, please let us know.

 
20.
Guest Icon
Guest
M&M

Thanks for the clarification, Bee! I hope you are feeling better!

 
1 2 3 

Leave a Reply


You can also just...

Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Bee
more by Mrs. Bee (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Bee

Copyright 2004-2013, Weddingbee.com
 

Find your vendors on Weddingbee

Favors by Weddingbee

Shop Now »

Mrs. Bee
Mrs. Bee

Mrs. Bee, New York Age and Occupation: 29, Weddingbee Publisher Fiance's Age and Occupation: 33, Internet Engagement Date: May 7, 2004 Wedding Date: March 5, 2005 Venue: Westside Loft, New York About Me: Yes, my name really is Bee! I love my blogging, wikis, and tabasco sauce!

Boards
Classifieds