Wedding Blog

One week from right now Mr. Pineapple and I will be heading back to our hotel room, all wedding planning will be over. And we will be married, again. Until then though, it will be work and wedding 24 hours a day. There is still a lot to do, even though I told myself early on I would have everything done a week early. (Which maybe I would have, had I not planned our first wedding for a week.)

All along I expected to be completely out of my mind with emotions at this point. I thought I would be stressed about all that needed to be done, worried about our freeJ set-up, nervous about the vows, excited to be a Mrs., frantically crafting like Martha & Red Bull, planning for our mini-moon, considering the meaning of ’till death do we part’, cutting ties with the last name I have always known and daydreaming about what it would feel like to see Mr. P for the first time on our wedding day.

For some reason though, I am completely calm. I don’t really care that the playlists are not finished, the vows are not written, programs are still figments of my imagination, gifts sit unwrapped, and we don’t have a final headcount — let alone seating plan. I have the utmost faith that everything will get done.

Why all of the sudden does everything seem so nonchalant? I have a couple theories. First of all, what is there to worry about? I am already (very happily!) married. I have never loved Mr. Pineapple more than I have since September 20th; he even looks differnt now. Maybe that means our wedding Saturday will not feel the same as it would have. He may not get the same feeling seeing me in my gown for the first time than he would have if we hadn’t already been married. Our vows may seem like a show more for our friends and family than a repeated forever promise to one another. It may seem more like a party than a marriage because, well, it will be. However, that doesn’t change the fact that it still the same party we have been planning all along, first wedding or not.

My second theory is that the big picture is finally crystal clear. I have never been too concerned about the wedding when compared to the marriage. I knew it was just a wedding and even if the venue burned down the morning of, it wouldn’t affect our marriage. Now I have proof. We are already married and if the Saturday wedding didn’t happen at this point, it wouldn’t really matter. Who cares about paper products when we have never been happier?

My final theory is that I am in denial. Maybe in a couple days it will hit me that Mr. Pineapple and I are having a wedding. That this amazingly romantic day spent with friends and family is actually happening to us. That even though we have been married for almost a month, this is the day we have been planning and anticipating since that wonderful moment in Central Park, is fast approaching. AND THERE ISN’T EVEN RIBBON TIED ON THE CLAY CORSAGES!!!

Did you feel an eerie sense of calm during the days approaching your wedding?