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Mrs. Dumpling, Las Vegas Age and Occupation: 27, Finance Fiance's Age and Occupation: 34, Real Estate Engagement Date: March, 2008 Wedding Date: March, 2009 Blogging Since: August 26, 2008 Venue: Catholic church ceremony & golf course reception About Me: I grew up in the Deep South, and while most people say I have a thick southern accent, I tend to think it only comes out when I need to use it. Living in Las Vegas has definitely been an adventure and Mr. Dumpling and I are loving every minute of it! We are planning a traditional Catholic wedding ceremony and a reception with lots of DIY! We might even get Elvis to show up! I'm a HUGE Beatles fan, love The Office and can't wait to become a Mrs.!
About Mrs. Dumpling

Catholic Weddings Can Be Confusing

October 17th, 2008 @ 1:52 pm by Mrs. Dumpling

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If you remember from a previous post, Mr. Dumpling is Catholic, and I am in the process of converting. One of the first things I asked our marriage coordinator at the church was about the difference between a Catholic wedding ceremony and, say, a Baptist or Methodist wedding ceremony. Being from the South, those were the sorts of weddings I attended. You know the ones—20 minutes max, I do, me too, kiss the bride. I now present…

Anyway, we decided that we wanted full Mass at our wedding. I was so shocked to find out that full Mass was an HOUR LONG. (*must not lock knees and pass out*)

 I’ve only attended one wedding at a Catholic church before, and honestly, I did not pay attention. I did some searching around on the Internet and on our Catholic Weddingbee boards and found out a few things. If you’re Catholic and think I’ve missed something, please speak up. I’m new and excited and I would love some input!

The Order of Mass The Mass is divided into five parts: gathering and entrance rite, Liturgy of the Word, marriage rite, Liturgy of the Eucharist, and concluding rite. The service should last a bit over an hour.

The gathering and entrance rite is a procession of the celebrant priest and deacon, the attendants, and the bride and groom to the altar. The priest greets the community and blesses them. There may be a penitential rite, which consists of a communal prayer for mercy and forgiveness, followed by a prayer or song called the Gloria.

The Liturgy of the Word consists of three readings from the Bible, chosen by the couple, all of which will probably have something to do with marriage. Friends and family members will be chosen to read the Scripture. First will be a reading from the Hebrew Bible or Old Testament; then a psalm, either read from the Book of Psalms, or a song based on one; then a reading from the New Testament. There will also be a reading from one of the four Gospels, preceded by a special Alleluia prayer or song called the Gospel Acclamation. (Christians who are able to do so should remain standing during the reading from the Gospel.) After the Gospel, the officiant will give a short homily reflecting on the marriage that is about to take place.

The marriage rite follows. The familiar exchange of vows and of rings will take place first, sealing the marriage. (This may seem anticlimactic to those who are used to seeing this part happen at the very end.) After the rings are exchanged, the Mass continues. Prayers for the newlyweds, for the community, and for various groups of people will be offered up.

The Liturgy of the Eucharist is when Communion is offered to the congregation. Bread and wine will be blessed and prepared to become the Eucharistic meal. We will pray the Lord’s Prayer together, then spend a few moments to offer one another a sign of peace in the form of a handshake or hug. Then the bread and wine will be distributed.

The concluding rite consists of a blessing of the community and of the newlyweds, a dismissal, and a recessional song. Guests should wait until the wedding party and priest has left before leaving their seats to exit the church.

Since a good number of our guests are not Catholic, we will also be printing a shortened version of this in the programs. That way, everyone knows when to sit, stand, kneel, stand, sing, shake hands, etc.

OK Catholic brides, I need your help. Is there anything I have left out? Any words of advice?

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47 Responses to “Catholic Weddings Can Be Confusing”

1.
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Almostananderson (message)  140 posts, Blushing bee

Catholic weddings are definitely long. We attended one last month and one of the groomsmen locked his knees and fainted in the middle of the ceremony! He had 9 stitches in his head, but made it back for the cake :) They are truly moving ceremonies, though, if you follow along and understand the meaning - good idea to explain it in your programs!

 
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Miss Taffy (message)  2,598 posts, Sugar bee

Oh yes, they are long. I stood up in a Catholic wedding a few years ago… luckily we were able to sit down for part of the mass. :)

 
3.
hbowar
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hbowar (message)  545 posts, Busy bee

I’m a Catholic bride as well. Both of us are cradle Catholics and I think you found out more information than I know! This list is really helpful BTW! I do think you included everything.

I’ve been to a lot of Catholic weddings and even though they are 1 hr or so, I think they go by pretty fast. At all of the Catholic weddings I’ve been to, the couple kneels at the front of the aisle on a special kneeler for almost the entire service. I would see if you church does this or if you sit by the altar and face the congregation.

When we asked our priest about a full mass and the shorter one, he said that if both people are Catholic they do the full mass. The wedding ceremony will follow the same outline as a regular Sunday mass, but with the Marriage Rite added in.

I would suggest you make sure you eat before the service and drink plenty of water! Kneeling for that long can be dangerous, especially in your dress! I would make sure that you can kneel ok in your dress during one of your fittings!

Sorry that was so long!

 
4.
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Kimberly

We had a full Catholic mass and it was 40 minutes, so I think it depends on the priest.

 
5.
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Katie

Hahaha…. I grew up Catholic, and I didn’t know until I was a teenager that weddings were ever LESS than an hour! I just figured they were all that long!

 
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ErinSea

An hour is probably the maximum length of time, 40-50 minutes is more usual, especially if you don’t have a lot of Catholic guests to receive Communion. The couple usually either sits in their own chairs on the altar or they kneel facing the altar for the majority of the Mass, but the wedding party will have a front pew reserved for them where they will be seated except during the exchange of vows/rings. So not to worry. I think that’s a good idea to include a description of the parts of Mass so people can follow along.

 
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Laura

We had a full Catholic mass. We weren’t facing the clock (or the congregation) for most of the mass and I started getting nervous that it was going too fast and would throw off the time frame I had set up. Until I turned and saw that we were in fact on time and did get finished just under an hour, probably around 45 min.

The thing that I was surprised about, and I think is standard for Catholic weddings, is you get to have your “wedding kiss” moment right before the priest tells everyone to give a sign of peace.

I made a full program to explain some of the Catholic rituals (what to do during Communion, etc. )to our guests since many of them were not Catholic. If you have any questions please feel free to email me.

And best wishes to you and the Mr. !

 
8.
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cricketpe (message)  65 posts, Worker bee

The length depends a lot on how many people are at the wedding and how long communion takes. Also, how long the homily and songs are. I’ve been to mostly Catholic weddings and at the ones I’ve been the bride and groom and wedding party sit during most of it, just like the rest of the guests (except the bride and groom are up front). The bridal party only stood up while the couple was saying their vows. In one wedding, only the MOH went up front, the rest of us all stayed in our pews.

 
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Lillindy
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Lillindy (message)  4,242 posts, Honey bee

My Catholic wedding was last month and the whole ceremony was maybe 40 minutes max because it does depend on the priest. It also depends on your song selections (because you don’t have to have songs for everything) and what readings you select. Also, if you priest likes to talk a lot good luck. I had been to other weddings at my church that were longer, like an hour or more. It was weird, though, for mine we were kneeling for the majority of it. At other weddings I’ve been to at my church they had the bride and groom side on the side of the alter for part of the ceremony so either way you don’t have to stand the whole time.

 
10.
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Natalie

Miss Dumpling — I actually made a pretty detailed program for our wedding (full mass) that included the readings, music, and a description of what the rite of marriage means to Catholics so that everyone could feel involved and our non-Catholic attendees would understand. Let me know if you would like to see a copy of it.

 
11.
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amaryliss

If the majority of your guests are not Catholic I’d reconsider the full mass. Communion time gets a bit long and confusing for those who are not.

Also, I don’t intend to sound snarky (typing never fully expresses intent), but I’d somehow let your guests know that it is usually frowned upon for a non-Catholic to receive Eucharist in a Catholic ceremony. It may depend on Churches, but in the community I grew up in it was unthinkable for anyone from another religion to get Eucharist. They’d have to get up, step aside to allow those receiving Eucharist to go ahead, sit down, and get up again for the same individuals to return. (I always found this tedious as I am expected - as a Catholic - to do the same when I am attending service at another religion’s church/temple). It gets to be a strained process.

 
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cricketpe (message)  65 posts, Worker bee

@ amaryliss: Another option is for non-Catholic guests to go up for communion like the rest of the guests, but cross their arms in front of their chest and the person giving communion with give them a blessing. There’s a little less of the stepping over each other in pews this way :) The priest has announced it at most weddings I’ve been to, which I like because I feel like it is more a person of authority notifying the rest of the guests.

 
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kate

If you’re looking for a good place to find the most common Catholic readings for weddings (for the Old Testament, New Testament & Homily readings you will need to select), someone at your church should be able to give you a book called “Together for Life” which has all that information.

These links were also helpful to me:

http://catholicweddinghelp.com/topics/readings-rite.htm

http://genesis-ministry.org/downloads/CatholicWeddingLiturgyReadings.pdf

I would just make sure that your program indicates to guests when they need to sit, stand, kneel, etc.

 
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teawithpaloma

I know we’re all chiming here, but another word of advice. Your groomsmen and bridesmaids will want to sit down. This kind of ceremony focuses on the couple. So just ribbon off the front rows on either side, or even in a side sanctuary for your party to sit. No one is expected to stand for an hour except the priest. Some churches also provide you and your fiance a chair to sit down in during the homily. No worries the priest will go through all this with you and if it doesn’t feel right…then ask a question!!

And about the Eucharist just add a note in the program that if the participant is not catholic but wishes to receive a blessing to just walk up with everyone else and cross their arms over their chest. Then the priest gives them a special blessing instead of bread.

 
15.
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teawithpaloma

@cricketpe: sorry cricketpe you beat me to it!

 
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Adrienne

I am a Catholic bride! Yes they do last an hour - BUT you don’t have to stand for the whole thing. You get to sit down (and kneel) like everyone else. I would also recommend a detailed description of what is going on for your non-catholic guests. Congrats and welcome to Catholicism!

 
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yelli

Make sure you ask about the kneeling thing, and practice kneeling in your dress gracefully!
Also, kneeling for a long time can be painful, so just be prepared.

I’ve usually seen the bridal party seated in the front row, except for the MOH and BM who act as the witnesses or whatever.

The Mass is so beautiful…I’m not Catholic, but I appreciate how much time and thought is put into the Mass instead of just rushing through a ceremony. But, it’s not for everyone…

 
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amaryliss

Wow, thats fantastic. I’ve never heard it announced at a ceremony though. Maybe to be certain you could request the priest to do it? I’ve been to several with a bunch of Lutherans (I’m Catholic, my man’s Lutheran) and they get so confused quickly (and then I get harassed afterward for not telling them “how its done”). I hate to admit it, but it is kind of humorous to watch!

Oh, and the Lord’s prayer. This is definitely a complaint I get from them all the time: Catholics tend to pause prior to “For Thine is the Kingdom….” whereas they just keep going.

Believe me, with the group I’m getting into we are just going to do a Blessing a week after the ceremony - that way I can do a short service with no confusing bits for my future in laws to have difficulties (and material for future jokes later) with.

 
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Heather B

We had a full Catholic Mass, and even though its long, I enjoyed every minute of it. You see the wedding ceremony is the most important part of the day, and with an hour ceremony you (or I in this case) had plenty of time to be in it, enjoying it and reminding myself a couple of times…. this is your wedding day, live in this moment, its the best time of your life…

 
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AC

I grew up going to Catholic weddings and was shocked at my first non-Catholic wedding. Liek 15 minutes!? :-) My full mass wedding was about 50 minutes and it went by sooo fast. About half of our guests weren’t Catholic, but even the most staunch athesists said they thought it was a beautiful ceremony. (Phew!)

Each church and priest is different and I’ve seen the bridal party stand the whole time or sit most of the time. Some brides and grooms sit at the altar, some kneel. We had our bridal party sitting in the front row and come up during our vows.

My advice is don’t go through the motions, but be really be present as each portion of the mass/ceremony happens.

Oh and the thing I never realized until our marriage prep is that the Sacrament of Marriage is the only Sacrament not performed by the priest, but by the couple. How cool is that?!

 
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Miss Cheese (message)  647 posts, Busy bee

Many churches allow you to provide chairs for the bride and groom to use during the longer parts of the ceremony. Ask, and then TAKE THEM UP ON IT. You can decorate them (recommended: nobody wants a bunch of pictures of themselves in beautiful clothes sitting on metal folding chairs) and then you can worry less about fainting and more about, ya know, the commitment you’re making!

 
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jennred782

The two things that can make the mass longer are the length of the priet’s homily after the gospel and how many are going up for communion. If you are having a large wedding you might want to have eucharistic ministers so it isn’t just the priest. A tip for not having to stand the entire time is that you could ask to have kneelers set up on the altar and then have chairs for your BM and MOH and then the rest of the bridal party sits in the first pew. I have pics of my cousin’s wedding where we did that. You can email me at jennred782 at comcast net Also make sure that any one in your bridal party knows what is going on before the rehersal so you don’t waste time going over stuff.

 
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Erin

A catholic wedding isn’t really confusing if you think of it as a regular mass, except you have wedding vows instead of a homily.

It’s not as straining as it sounds, since you will sit and kneel as you typically do during a mass. You (or your wedding party) will NOT be standing the whole hour! Reserving the first row for your wedding party is a good idea, as it having chairs on the side of the “stage.” The church coordinator will know how your priest/church prefers the set-up.

The only difference between a full mass and a “short” Catholic wedding is communion. You can elect to go with the short version if you want to avoid any potential issues with non-Catholics (which is really, really rare), but if most of your guests won’t take communion anyway, it won’t really save you any time.

Do let your priest know that many guests are not Catholic and not familiar with a Catholic mass. They are used to it, and will be particularly specific about when to stand, sit, kneel and how to accept the Eucharist or a blessing (or remain seated). Let your priest dictate who should receive communion, since while there are rules it does vary a bit from priest to priest. If you print it in the programs, be sure to check with your priest first.

In general, don’t worry about your guests following along - it’s pretty easy to sit and stand when everyone else does! I’ve been to weddings where only about 25% of the guest were Catholic and everything went smoothly. They will look primarily at you and your wedding party for clues, so if none of your wedding party are Catholic brief them beforehand. At my brother’s wedding, I was the only Catholic bridesmaid, so it was like a game of simon-says and the others followed exactly what I did. Be sure to let them know that they may receive a blessing OR stay seated during communion if they choose BEFORE the wedding! I’ve noticed that wedding party members are the only guests who stress about communion because they are particularly sensitive to your wishes and don’t want to offend.

 
24.
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dreambml (message)  486 posts, Helper bee

I thought I would say something, being someone non-catholic, actually, more on the atheist end of things….I have been to a Catholic ceremony. Very long….but its your wedding, so obviously you do what you want. As for non-Catholic guests taking part in some of the traditions, it was honestly awkward for me. I don’t believe in the things they believe, and I felt VERY uncomfortable being asked to do the things they ask. I guess its okay to tell the people about what you are doing, but don’t expect them to participate. I could not pretend, or “fake” my beliefs - therefore, I was not going to sing, recite the prayers, or take communion. It was definitely awkward to even be in a church, to be honest but obviously I would go to support the marriage….but it is hard when you don’t want to go up and receive communion, unfortunately people look at you funny if they don’t know you, and then questions come. To me, its no ones business what I believe. But when an entire church full of people are doing something and you aren’t, its awkward. My point is, in your program, make it clear - say this is the Catholic tradition, you’re invited to participate but you aren’t required to do so. I totally felt like praying to something I don’t believe in made me a fake, or like I was being judged by their God, or mine or whatever I believe in….weird right? hahaha….I just thought some thoughts from a non-catholic guest may be useful to you. And I have no intention of sounding “snarky” or rude….

 
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Miss Dumpling (message)  650 posts, Busy bee

@hbowar: Good advice *must eat and drink water before I get married….*
@Laura: Thanks, Laura! I was wondering where the kiss fit into this whole thing!
@Natalie: Thank you! I’d love to see it. dumpling.bee at gmail.com
@amaryliss: You don’t sound snarky at all. What you’re saying makes absolute sense. However, we attend Mass every Sunday and it’s very special to us, as a couple. So, even though some of our guests are not Catholic, we want to include it for personal reasons.
@kate: THANK YOU! Very helpful!
@yelli: Im so worried about kneeling in my dress. I didn’t want to sound like a snot nose brat, so I didn’t put that part in my post, but OMG I am not the most graceful person and I just know I’ll look awkward!
@Heather B: Well said, Heather!
@Erin: Thanks for all the info. I like your “simon Says” reference!
@dreambml: I really appreciate your comment. You don’t sound snarky or rude at all, so don’t worry about that. I think the way you felt at that wedding is how many people feel. But, given your own belief system, I think it speaks very highly of you that even though you didn’t agree with your friend’s faith, you still went to the ceremony and respected it and them. The first time I went to Mass I felt like the new kid in class. I had no idea what was going on, so I just kind of looked around and copied people. I’ll make sure to mention in the programs that people are invited to participate, but are not obligated. Thanks again for sharing your point of view.

 
26.
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islandMama

Hi Miss Dumpling–this is my first post! But I didn’t think that there would be a better discussion to post it on :)

Congratulations on your upcoming wedding in the Church! I’m looking forward to mine as well. It’s so wonderful that you’ve chosen to have a full mass–there’s no reason to take out the receiving of Eucharist just because many people will not be Catholic–it’s the most important part of each mass! You’d never want to skip that on your wedding of all days! I noted that someone stated that you should make sure you eat just prior to the mass. You’ve probably heard that this isn’t a good idea, as we are asked to fast for a time period building up to receiving communion. Maybe something in the very early morning would make more sense (that’s what I think I’ll do anyways).

Also, you can go even longer than one hour if you wish! Sometimes it depends on what sort of music you have chosen (for instance, if you are having a full choir perform all of the chosen pieces, as opposed to a close friend, or just one soloist), and also whatever else you incorporate into the ceremony. There are often cultural traditions that are specific to each culture that are practiced during the wedding mass. Another thing you might want to consider, is whether you and Mr. Dumpling will offer flowers to Our Lady, as a means of asking her intercession on your marriage. This is always a wonderful thing–and it used to be very common for the man to also spend time with St. Joseph, asking for his intercession as a husband as well! We Catholics love our symbols and traditions, don’t we?! ;)

This part of your day will be far more important and impacting than the reception or anything else (no, I’m not a religious teacher! haha)…just reading your post gives me chills, and makes me so excited for my own upcoming wedding! When you make that forever covenant with Mr. Dumpling and God, you will be forming something so strong that you two will have all the graces needed for it never to be broken.

So don’t be overwhelmed by the length of the mass–this is your day, and you will experience it once! I’m so excited for you–congratulations on what will be a beautiful wedding day!

 
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Christine

@dreambml - I am in the same boat as you. I was recently a bridesmaid in a Catholic wedding. And the communion part really stressed me out. During the rehearsal, the priest said he would go to the first row (where the bridal party was) and hand out communion first to whoever wanted it. Well, on the day of the wedding he just walked up to everyone so fast, I was nervous, I had to actually say no and shake my head or else he was just going to give it to me.
It was just personally awkard for me, especially considering that everyone around me was Catholic. And I felt like I stood out b/c of that.
It’s easier to be a guest in the back pews, so everyone isn’t watching you.
Miss D - Is your bridal party all Catholic? If not, it might be nice to mention to them that they don’t have to particpate in the mass, if they so choose.

 
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becca

Hey Miss Dumpling,

We sat for most of the Mass, and we faced the congregation. Our priest suggested it and many of our guests commented that they liked that a lot. Let me know if you’d like to see a copy of our program as well.

 
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Miss Dumpling (message)  650 posts, Busy bee

@Christine: No, they are Methodist, Jewish, no idea, Catholic and no idea…I would have felt awkward too for saying no and shaking my head. It’s quite intimidating, I agree.

 
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Lynnette

Hi Miss Dumpling! The only other part of the Wedding Mass that is optional is the offering of flowers to Mary - that is when the bride and groom “gift” a bouquet of flowers (or even a single flower) to wherever the statue of Mary is located in the Church. You both will then kneel and say a little prayer, and then go back to the alter. This usually is the length of the “ave maria” song. Also, most Catholic churches do not impose their traditions on non-catholic attendees. So your bridal party should not be expected (or even allowed to) participate in any of the sacraments. Congrats!

 
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haselwand (message)  187 posts, Blushing bee

Catholic bride also! We are definitely having a full mass. It it is highly recommended {if not required} when both parties are Catholic.

As someone mentioned, definitely put in a notation in the program that the Eucharist is reserved for Catholics and that if you would like to participate you can cross your arms for a blessing. I would fill your maids/groomsmen in on this as well, if they aren’t Catholic. If you fill them in, hopefully they won’t feel too uncomfortable.

 
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becca

@Lynette: I’m sort of a stickler about this (and I only recently learned about it when we were planning our mass) but the offering to Mary isn’t actually part of the nuptial mass. I thought it was since both my cousins did it but it’s not.

 
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Miss Cloud (message)  587 posts, Busy bee

I am also a catholic bride. My FH and I were both born and raised catholic, and like many other of the responders it wasn’t until I was older that I knew weddings could be shorter! I am looking forward to the long mass though, it is really so special. I am worried about it being cut though! Like many churches, mine holds Saturday evening mass, and if we start more than FIVE minutes late, we are cut from a full mass to a shorter ceremony!
Congrats though! And don’t worry, everyone that I have talked to that had a full mass said it flies by way too fast!!

 
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starjas

Yeah, it seemed short for me. I’d make sure you ask the coordinator if the floors been swept. It wasn’t so for the most part during the whole time, except during homily when the priest was addressing questions to us and the attendees, all I was thinking was how dirty the bottom of my dress had become because it basically cleaned the floor! It didn’t matter later since our reception was outdoors but yeah, it got really dirty in a matter of seconds.

 
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Miss Dumpling (message)  650 posts, Busy bee

@starjas: Great tip, Starjas! I would have never thought of that! I wanted an aisle runner, but the church vetoed me. I’ll put that on my list of things to remember. Thanks so much!

 
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v

I’m not sure what is the practice in America as I’m not from there but here we usually have a commentator who announces all the “please stand”, “please sit”, “let us stand to welcome the bride”.

I’ve been a commentator for a couple of weddings and if you’re worried about non-catholics not knowing what to do during communion, you can ask the commentator to say something before announcing the communion hymn. “please be reminded that holy communion is for baptised Catholics only”

Something along those lines. My parish priest is also pretty good at explaining rituals and telling the congregation what to do especially if the couple gives him the heads up about a large non-catholic gathering. After all, even for some Catholics the whole wedding mass might be confusing, especially the nuptial blessing between the Our Father and the Sign of Peace.

 
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Mrs. Peacock (message)  374 posts, Helper bee

I typed out my whole mass with songs, responses, etc. if you want me to send you a copy! I could also send you my program.

There are a few things that aren’t necessary, including the prayers to Mary and the Unity Candle… if you are trying to cut back on time. I felt like mine went by quickly, but I am used to Catholic masses.

 
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missteaberry

Like Mrs. Peacock, I’m Catholic, had the full-length mass, and also was not phased by the length! If you would want me to send you the file for our program, you can message me. We explained some parts of the mass in our programs because about 60+% of our guests were not practicing Catholics. If you have any questions about Catholic weddings at all, though, I would be glad to answer questions!

 
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Guilty Secret

You’re in the process of converting to a religion having only been to mass there once and not paid attention?! Does no one else think that’s a little weird?!

 
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crickepte

@Guilty Secret: It says one Catholic wedding, not one mass. If her family isn’t Catholic, it’s not surprising she hasn’t had many opportunities to go to Catholic weddings. I’m born and raised and have only been to a few, and since I was much younger, I didn’t pay a ton of attention to the differences between a wedding and a normal mass.

 
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Guilty Secret

You’re right, my mistake, she did say she’d only attended one Catholic wedding. She also said she was shocked to hear that a Catholic mass was an hour long, so presumably she hasn’t been to that many masses either…?

 
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Jennifer

Hi, somehow I stumbled upon your site & wanted to chime in. My dh & I will celebrate our 10th anniversary this December and were married in a Catholic church as we are both cradle Catholics.

I wanted to address a couple of things some others did not mention. One of the biggest differences between a Catholic & Protestant wedding ceremony is that we, as Catholics, believe that marriage is a sacrament, elevated by Jesus at the wedding at Cana. In the marriage sacrament, you and your fiance are the ministers of the sacrament; the priest or deacon is just a witness. I think it is beautiful that the bridal couple are the facilitators of this sacrament.

Another thing that makes the marriage ceremony different is that the priest has a beautiful set of prayers that can be prayed over you & your husband at the conclusion of the Mass, prayers to lift you up and ask God to give you grace to be good to each other and good parents. I wish I still had a copy of that prayer, because it was awesome. I felt such love from our family and friends as they prayed over us.

I think it is great that you are including the full Mass; newlyweds need all the grace they can get and how wonderful to start your life together by including Jesus in the Eucharist and celebration in the prayer of the Mass. This is the biggest day of your life and you need God close to you!

Congratulations on your upcoming conversion - welcome to the Church. And good luck on your upcoming wedding. Blessings & prayers to you & your fiance.

 
43.
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Miss Dumpling (message)  650 posts, Busy bee

@Jennifer: Thanks, Jennifer! I just learned about this at RCIA over the weekend and I’m even more excited. I appreciate your comments=)

 
44.
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Catherine K.

@Natalie: I hope you don’t mind me butting in Miss Dumpling, but I was wondering if Natalie can send this to me as well. I’m also converting to Catholicism so seeing the program will be very helpful! :)

Thanks! email: meocat [@] gmail

 
45.
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MissFleurdeLis

As a lifelong Catholic who has been in her share of Catholic weddings, even in the context of the full mass, they all tend to differ! I have seen a lot of folks pass out–the bride, the best man, etc. Make sure you wiggle your toes and bend your knees if you are standing for prolonged times (when I was little and an altar server, I often fainted at mass and my dad gave me this advice). Make sure to eat before your ceremony, so designate a person to make you eat something with sugar in it to keep your blood sugar up.

I really like that you are including information for non-Catholics. I think that the Catholic mass can be confusing and unwelcoming at times to non-Catholics. We are printing explanations for all parts of our nuptial mass too.

 
46.
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Kelly

It has been wonderful reading all your tips on Catholic weddings. I am getting married in December, and we have decided to do the ‘full’ catholic mass. I went through the RCIA program last year, so I am a new Catholic and all this is very confusing to me yet.

Mrs Peacock, Natalie, Becca: You all offered to share a copy of your wedding program/typed out rituals. It would be absolutely wonderful if you could share them with me too. I am at a loss of where to even begin creating our program.

My email address is: country_kel_7@hotmail.com

This is really stressful for me because almost everyone on my side of the family is NOT Catholic and everyone on his side of the family IS Catholic. I am worried about my side of the family feeling incredibly left out and lost.

Does anyone have any tips to overcome this? What has been your experience?

Thanks everyone! Good luck with all your planning!

 
47.
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jeaniebelle

Islandmama-
If you do want to eat before Mass, because you are afraid of fainting, the normal rule is one hour before communion, so as long as you don’t eat within half an hour-forty five minutes of the time the Mass begins, you’re okay. If you still feel like you need to eat closer to the time, it’s an option to talk to the priest about a dispensation from that rule for the day. The priest wont always allow it, but it doesn’t hurt to ask.

 


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Mrs. Dumpling Mrs. Dumpling, Las Vegas Age and Occupation: 27, Finance Fiance's Age and Occupation: 34, Real Estate Engagement Date: March, 2008 Wedding Date: March, 2009 Blogging Since: August 26, 2008 Venue: Catholic church ceremony & golf course reception About Me: I grew up in the Deep South, and while most people say I have a thick southern accent, I tend to think it only comes out when I need to use it. Living in Las Vegas has definitely been an adventure and Mr. Dumpling and I are loving every minute of it! We are planning a traditional Catholic wedding ceremony and a reception with lots of DIY! We might even get Elvis to show up! I'm a HUGE Beatles fan, love The Office and can't wait to become a Mrs.!
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