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Beehive Feature Launched: Aug 31, 2006 About: A forum for readers to post questions and get feedback from the hive, aka the weddingbee community.
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Hot Thread: Decisions Not Good Enough…

November 21st, 2008 @ 11:33 am by Beehive

Hi Hive,

I’m just wondering if anybody else has experienced or is experiencing their family telling or hinting to them that their decisions about the flowers, dress, shoes, or money are all wrong?

I’ll give you some background and examples:

I’m 28 years old.  I started saving money as soon as I got my first job out of college.  I really don’t spend a lot of money in my everyday life.  I have no debt or loans.  So now, after saving for 7 years, I have a pretty good nest egg.  My fiance does too, so we’re paying for the wedding by ourselves, hoping that everyone can just come and enjoy themselves.  I have never asked my parents for any moeny and I’m not blowing my entire life savings on this wedding either…

Any time I tell my mom about anything wedding related, like the fact that I just booked a florist, her response isn’t, “Great, what kinds of flowers do you like?”  Her response is, “How much was the estimate?  Don’t spend too much money.  They’re just flowers.”

If I show her pictures of the jewelry I’m thinking about wearing, instead of saying, “those look nice,”  I’ll get an, “Oh, really?  You should ask your sister what her opinion is.  She’s knows art/fashion.”

It seems that any wedding related decision I make, I’m either being told to stop spending money OR being hinted to that I don’t have a lot of fashion sense.  I’m kind of hurt and actually a little insulted because my parents don’t know how much I’ve saved nor do they know how much I’m spending (or really, how much I’m not spending).  I always assure them that I have a budget and that I’m sticking to the budget.

I don’t think my fashion sense is terrible.  In fact, I tend to be minimalist, simple, and, I’d like to think, elegant.  Think roses, peonies, ranunculus, some teardrop earrings, a flash of colored shoes, etc.  You get my point.  I guess I’m just wondering if this is something all brides’ families tell them?  I feel like my parents should be more supportive… not tear me down…

Any advice?

peony80

~~~

Please comment on the thread here.

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