Weddingbee Blog

I had been searching for meaningful readings that were a little different from your average wedding poem or religious passage. Something that would be thoughtful and sweet, but wouldn’t make my 76-year-old grandmother scratch her head in confusion. This was easier said than done.

I’d considered E. E. Cummings poems, a selection from The Velveteen Rabbit, religious readings and more! But I had come up empty-handed. Nothing seemed… right.

That is, of course, until I stumbled upon Robert Fulghum’s poem, Union. Check it.

You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes, to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making commitments in an informal way. All of those conversations that were held in a car, or over a meal, or during long walks – all those conversations that began with, “When we’re married”, and continued with “I will” and “you will” and “we will” – all those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” – and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding.

The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things that we’ve promised, and hoped, and dreamed – well, I meant it all, every word.”Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another – acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another these past few years. Shortly you shall say a few words that will take you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never quite be the same.

For after today you shall say to the world –
This is my husband. This is my wife.

I immediately teared up when I read it, mostly because it’s so true. The process of planning a wedding doesn’t just begin from the time you get engaged. It’s all those hopes and dreams that you spoke about in the future tense, being careful to add a “maybe”, or “if” (which, by the way, is one of the most freeing things about actually being engaged. I no longer need to use those terms to talk about our wedding, and our life together).

My best friend (and bridesmaid) is going to be reading this at the wedding. I know she’s going to put so much feeling into it- I can’t wait!

Are you considering any out-of-the-box readings for your wedding?