Wedding Blog
Let me first say that I am a dedicated reviewer.
If I enjoyed a service, or felt that it was extraordinary, I write a letter or review the service/product immediately. I depend on honest reviews for purchasing things off of Amazon, and the honest reviews of brides on Wedding Wire. After our engagement ring purchase I emailed Tiffany & Co. to let them know how fantastic our experience was. I’ve never really questioned the legitimacy of a review.
Perhaps I was naive. We’re pretty happy with our current caterer selection. My father is currently hashing out the contract. I REALLY wanted to find a caterer who used local, organic ingredients and that hopefully would be in our price range. I was excited to find a local caterer who met those requirements, so even though we had met with Caterer A and Caterer B, we decided to look into Caterer C since they were the only local food/organic caterer we had come across.
When the caterer first called they kept Mr. D’orsay on the phone forever, and kept talking about how detail oriented they were. Afterward, the caterer sent Mr. D’orsay an email addressed to something along the lines of “Mr. J’orsay”. This automatically put me off. If this caterer was so detail oriented, couldn’t they get Mr. D’orsay’s name correct? Mr. D’orsay’s email even starts with Mr. D’orsay! Their price was also a bit higher than Caterer A or B, so we moved on with Caterer B and set up the aforementioned meeting and tastings.
Mr. D’orsay received a voicemail from Caterer C letting us know that due to the market they had lowered their prices. I began to think that I could overlook the previous gaffe and air of pretentiousness until…
They offered us a BRIBE.
They would refund us $300 pending positive reviews on theknot.com and chowhound.com. You’ve got to be kidding me! As a dedicated “reviewer”, if I enjoyed the service I’d happily give them positive reviews. I don’t mind if the incentive is small, such as free shipping, or a $5 gift certificate. But this was outrageous. I feel that that amount seems large enough to alter a review. I began to call into question the legitimacy of every review I’ve ever read about them.
In the end, I decided I’d rather have an ethical caterer than a local/organic one.
Is this a common practice? Have any of you ever experienced anything like this? Am I overreacting?
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Share this post: Bribe the Bride?
Yuck! That’s slimy. I’m also a firm believer in the honest review policy, and in referrals! Every time I find a vendor that does something special and out of the ordinary, I recommend them to my family and friends. Word of mouth is huge in the wedding industry!
Good for you for choosing integrity! 
Nope, you’re not overreacting. That’s creepy, and you were absolutely right to question whether those “rave reviews” were from people who thought, “well, they were just OK/made some mistakes/were a total disaster, but I really want that $300.”
And if they’re willing to use bribes to alter their reviews, how could you trust them when they claim all their produce is “local” and “organic”?
At my sister’s wedding, her DJ told her at the end of the night he’d play for another 1/2 hour for no cost — if she reviewed him positively on The Knot. If not, there’d be a bill to pay. Needless to say, we ended the party on time, and carried on elsewhere!
And I certainly didn’t look into that company when hiring my DJ!
Shady!
I also give glowing remarks to vendors and business’ that I’ve had a positive experience with. (sometimes so glowing it sounds like I’ve been paid- but really I’m just that excited to share a good thing with people)
Not just with my wedding but whenever I’m looking to hire or work with someone new I rely heavily on reviews of friends and online. (this will make me really look more closely at reviews i read) Maybe you should comment about the “bribe” on the msg boards- or is that too much? Just so others reading can look at the previous reviews with a grain of salt..
good for you for sticking to your guns instead of taking the money!
That’s egregious. You should post on theknot and chowhound, but tell everyone that the caterer offered to pay you $300 for a positive review!
That is crazy!! I can’t believe they offered you this *before* you booked them. I would think that it would make all potential clients rethink the reviews they have read and get a bad taste in their mouth about their business. I agree with HC - post a review about them and expose their sleezy practices!
Wow!!
I cannot believe they actually asked for a positive review in exchange for service. If this happened to me I will review them on the places they have requested but it wont be positive.
They are really bold.
I can’t tell if it would be worse of me to review them like that or not. Because I’m assuming most people who contact them will be asked the same thing and they can make their own decision. I haven’t crossed off adding my own review of them yet though.
That would bother me to and seal the deal for me not to use them. You are not overreacting.
I would definately let people know about the bribe as Miss Hot Cocoa suggests. They didn’t tell you about the bribe until a ways into negotiations so they may not make this offer to everyone (those who jump on their higher price perhaps)? By adding your experience to the reviews people will know to take the reviews with a grain of salt. I know I would be happy to know about this practice if they were on my list of caterers.
Wow that is incredible! It definitely makes you question the reviews you read now!
That is definitely not the type of vendor I’d want to work with. I mean, if your service can’t generate good reviews on its own, then you should work on providing better service, not bribing customers to falsely advertise for you.
Wow that is insane! I am a big reviewer too — mostly on yelp.com. I have never heard of this! Incredible! Good for you sticking to your guns.
Wow, I didn’t know people did that. Good thing you decided not to go with them. I rely heavily on word of mouth advertising for Vendors. And Yelp.
Seriously?! Grrrrr, that gets my goat! I’ve heard of vendor kickbacks, but never bribing a bride to give a good review. Good for you for standing on your morals!
Whoa… That’s unbelievable!!! I definitely have not come across anything like that - wedding-related or not. There was some iffy stuff with our real estate agent, but nothing as bad as this.
You should post this on as many vendor review sites as possible. Perspective clients need to know that their other reviews may be paid for. I’ve heard that business owners and employees will post fake positive reviews - but bribes are really disingenuous.
I’m with you, I love reviewing and am a loyal yelp.com user.
I can’t believe that caterer tried to bribe you. It shows a poor business practice. People should run far, far away from them. Now I’m wondering which caterer this is since I’m pretty familar with most in the area. :p I already have mine, and thankfully they have a pretty glowing reputation.
Yuck. That reminds me of an apartment complex that FI and I were looking at. We went to look at reviews and it was clear that all properties owned by this company stuffed their reviews to make themselves look good. We promptly cut the place from our list.
I’m not surprised actually. I’m a regular on the knot boards and we get girls all the time that come on once and rave about a vendor they just booked. How can you rave about someone if you haven’t used them?
I’m proud of you for sticking to your guns and not going with them!
That’s a little shady… and definitely bribery.
On the other hand, doing this to a smaller degree is common of wedding vendors and many other businesses. It really is a form of advertising, and most clients can’t be bothered to leave reviews (unless they have something bad to say!). Offering a small incentive like a future discount (usually percentage, not monetary) or entry into a contest encourages people to contribute. Whether or not you like it, it comes with the territory.
They have no right to demand positive reviews though… just asking for any review. And it’s not right to ask that before all is said and done.
$300 is absolutely a bribe for your help to fool unsuspecting customers who might think, well they cost more but hey look at these reviews from actual brides, must be worth it.
You should definitely put this experience on theknot and chowhound, brides and other’s looking for caterers should be warned that those reviews might not be so genuine. I would certainly appreciate knowing that sort of info and hope others are willing to call services out on shady deals.
@ Miss D’orsay- I hope you went on the knot and wedding wire to post about their ‘incentive program’!
Whoa! I am also an avid reviewer and that would have ticked me off… I would definitely questions their other reviews. Kudos to you for not using them
Our photographer offered us a free 5×7 print if we review her on yelp based on our engagement photo session. I didn’t think of it as a bribe, until this post…She did a great job with our engagement photos, which is why I haven’t felt guilty about reviewing her. If she hasn’t done such a good job, though, I probably wouldn’t have posted a review.
That $300 IS tempting, but now I am rethinking every review (especially wedding-related) I’ve ever read! Way to be ethical, J’orsay, I mean D’orsay.
Wow … that sends up immediate red flags. If their business is good enough, they don’t need to bribe people! Please, please inform brides about this company!
That’s terrible… I definitely agree that you should post reviews of them to inform other brides. If I was researching caterers I’d want to know about this before I wasted even a minute on them!
omg that is horrible! i have to say i am pretty shocked! i could understand asking people to give reviews, but for them to ask SPECIFICALLY for a positive review and having money tied to that, that is just wrong! it absolutely calls into question every review that is available on them.
i wonder if it is worth adding a review on yelp not commenting on the quality of their service (since you didn’t actually get to experience how they would’ve handled an event), but mentioning that they did offer money for positive reviews? i know that would be horrible and could really damage their yelp ratings, but imho, i think it is better that consumers are aware so as to avoid more service companies (in any industry, not just weddings) engaging in practices like this!
Ew!!! You should definitely write a review of that so others will know. That calls into question the legitimacy of all their reviews. That’s ridiculous.
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Mrs. D'orsay, Baltimore/Lancaster UK
Age and Occupation: 24, Stay at home fiance (formerly in nonprofit communications)
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Web site developer and designer; co-owner of men's skincare shop
Engagement Date: August 10, 2008
Wedding Date: August, 2009
Venue: Oakland Manor
About Me: I'm a Maryland raised environmental policy wonk/activist/organizer and communications aficionado. In the past year I've lived in Baltimore, MD, Tucson, AZ, Miami, FL and Lancaster, England. In my not so spare time I enjoy planning trips with Mr. D' Orsay, visiting friends and family and crafting like a mo-fo. I also enjoy modern dance classes, rugby and soccer but have been banned by my mother, MOHs, and Mr. D' Orsay from playing till after the wedding. I have an unnatural addiction to cheese and shoes, but love Mr. D' Orsay more than either and can't wait to become Mrs. D' Orsay!
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