My Friends are Like Sprinkles

My Friends are Like Sprinkles

January 18th, 2009 @ 11:03 am by Mrs. D'orsay

Spread all over the place that is.

In the past year or so I’ve lived in Baltimore MD, Tucson AZ, Miami FL, Columbia MD and now Lancaster UK. As you can imagine I’ve come to know and adore so many people from so many places!

This brings up a tough point, because there are so many dear friends I’d love to invite, but I’m not sure if A) I can fit them all or B) if they can all come. There are many people in my life that I was once close to but have since lost touch with.

I don’t want to not invite people because they live far away, especially because I’d really love to see them. Nor do I want them to feel obligated to buy a gift for us just because they’re invited. Is there a way to invite them so they feel included, but not obligated? We’re already inviting 85, when our set guest count is 80, so I don’t want to push that envelope too far.

What would you do if you were me?

Tags: baltimore, guest-list |

| Share this post: My Friends are Like Sprinkles

Latest Gallery Pics

My ring... just hangin' out on some pearls

7 Responses to “My Friends are Like Sprinkles”

Member

slicey19 (message) 802 posts, Busy bee

keep a B list and once people decline invite B-listers so you know you won’t go over your set number. I don’t know how to make peeople not feel obligated to attend or get a gift, I struggle with the same issue.

1/18/09 @ 11:41 am (reply)

Guest

Cassie

I decided I could either have a wedding with 500 people or a wedding with 5 people. I wanted to maintain my sanity and my credit, so I chose the latter. I think we are going to throw a reception a few months after the ceremony.

1/18/09 @ 11:58 am (reply)

Guest

Olive

I decided if I hadn’t spoken to the person (email doesn’t count!) in a year they were not invited. Even though I have old friends that I like, I couldn’t justify it if we hadn’t actually conversed about our lives…I’m sure thy probably understand that too.

1/18/09 @ 12:51 pm (reply)

Member

cannotwait (message) 1,030 posts, Bumble bee

we invited 180something, even though our site’s max is 150 & recommends 100…surprisingly, we might come in under 100

1/18/09 @ 12:55 pm (reply)

Bee

Mrs. Pinot Noir (message) 772 posts, Busy bee

It sounds like you would get a fair number of declines due to travel so don’t worry about going over your set number of 80. We worried about this too, limited our guest list, and ended up with far less people than we had originally envisioned. As for your friends, I believe if you tell them that you honestly would love for them to be there but if they can’t make it you completely understand and that a gift is by no means expected than they should get it. This is what we did with our friends and it seemed to work pretty well… Good luck!

1/18/09 @ 6:28 pm (reply)

Member

blightygirl (message) 207 posts, Helper bee

Our guest list is at about 150 knowing that nearly half (or more) will not be able to make it to Chicago due to travel/cost. We’re lucky that we also have a UK reception for some who won’t be able to attend.
We’ve made it clear to all invitees that they are no way obligated to bring/buy a gift. We invited them because we love them. For those who are fortunate to be able to attend either the wedding in the US or the UK reception, coming all the way from (pick the European/African country or far-away US city) to see us and celebrate will be gift enough.
I agree with Mrs. Pinot Noir: as long as you’re honest and heartfelt, your friends will understand. I truly believe that.

1/19/09 @ 11:24 am (reply)

Guest

Liz

For a local wedding the average percentage of declines is 10-15% - that percentage of course goes up signifcantly for people who aren’t local to the wedding. Since you aren’t wanting to invite a ridiculous number over your set “80″, you should be fine inviting the far away folks. And I second what Mrs. Pinot Noir says about conveying your feelings about their presence and gift expectations.

1/21/09 @ 10:07 am (reply)