Wedding Blog
They say that no wedding would be complete without a meltdown. Knowing this, I was determined to be the very first bride not to go down that path. And in fact, excepting a few minor (relatively speaking) flare-ups, I kept it together right up until the very end.
And then The Incident happened.
The day before the wedding, Mr Breezy and I were enjoying a rare moment of pre-wedding down time with our friends. We were on the beach and Mr Breezy decided he’d use this opportunity to go to the market just down the road from the resort to buy some cigars. He enlisted his friend J to accompany him and they left, saying they were going to drop by the room first to grab some cash. He asked me if I wanted him to take anything with him back to the room. I said, “No thanks, we’re fine,” and they were off.
About half an hour later, I changed my mind and decided to go back to the room after all.
I opened the door to our gigantic suite and dumped my beach bag on the floor. And as I walked in towards the lounge area of our room, I spotted something out of the corner of my eye.
Something in the bedroom.
Something big.
Something white.
I stopped and my jaw dropped as I turned to see my wedding dress hanging from the rail of our four poster bed… IN FULL VIEW OF THE DOOR THROUGH WHICH I KNEW MR BREEZY HAD COME ONLY 30 MINUTES BEFORE.
(This photo was taken the next day but it will give you an idea of what I saw. Picture the doors flung wide open and the dress positioned so the long white train is spread out dramatically all over the bed.)
So wait a second here.
I had just spent eleven months hiding photos of my wedding dress, and then the actual dress itself, from the prying eyes of Mr Breezy, only to have him walk into our room and see it in plain view the day before the wedding?!?!
WHAT. THE. %$#@ ??????????????
*Cue meltdown - complete with body-wracking sobs, hair pulling and rivers of snot.*
I was devastated over the fact that Mr Breezy had seen my dress (c’mon, it’s a pretty common thing to want it to be a surprise, right?) but in retrospect, I think the intensity of my meltdown had a lot to do with stress. All the problems and worries and sleeplessness of the previous weeks and days had finally gotten to me and, seeing an outlet, run straight for it at full speed.
So I did the only thing I could: I had myself a real good, hard, furious, raging cry.
As soon as I pulled myself together enough to string a sentence together, I picked up the phone to get that wedding coordinator on the line and demanded an explanation.
You see, I had left my dress and the guys’ outfits with Sandra to get them steamed, with the expectation they were to be delivered to us the morning of the wedding. Well, she had absolutely no explanation for why I had received them a day early. That is, not then, anyway. When we met with her post-wedding, she tried to tell us she had said the items would be delivered “in time” for the wedding but not necessarily the day of which was ridiculous. After all, the groom and I were sharing a room; when else could they be delivered, pray tell? And if she had indeed at any point suggested the dress might be delivered any time other than right before I needed it, don’t you think I would have asked her to deliver it to one of our many friends’ rooms instead?
There was nothing she could do, since the damage was done, but I made it clear how upset and disappointed I was, if for no other reason than to press upon her the importance of the mistake. I didn’t want anyone else to have to go through that.
And what did Mr Breezy think about this whole mess? Well, when I finally saw him he told me that the dress must have been delivered right after he was in the room because he didn’t see it. Even his friend J - who is THE biggest joker on the planet - swore up, down and sideways that they hadn’t seen the dress. And so I fully believed them.
It was only several days after the wedding that Mr Breezy confessed. He said knew how important it was to me and he didn’t want to see me hurting any more, so he told me he hadn’t seen the dress when in fact, he had. I think it’s one of the most romantic things he’s ever done. Don’t you?
Did you have a pre-wedding meltdown and if so, what triggered it?
DW in the DR: Pack It Up, Pack It In
DW in the DR: Airport Confessions
DW in the DR: Bienvenidos a Punta Cana
DW in the DR: The Guest List Is In the Bag
DW in the DR: The OOTs in Action
DW in the DR: Planning the Reception
DW in the DR: Planning the Flowers & Cake
DW in the DR: Planning the Ceremony
DW in the DR: Planning the Photography
DW in the DR: Stag and Showerette
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Share this post: DW in the DR: The Meltdown
Ohhhhh yes! My meltdown, unfortunatley, occurred in front of our ENTIRE bridal party. Just after a very stressful rehearsal, amidst lots of family drama - I was climbing into TGroom’s truck to go to the rehearsal dinner. I whacked my head on the door frame. Not even that hard. And BAWLED my eyes out. Everyone figured I had a concussion or something and that I would have a hideous lump on my head the next day. But no. Just needed a good cry. 
Oh no! That was really sweet of the Mr. though. What a thoughtful guy!
oh gosh! Big hug to you Mrs. Breezy, I would have had a melt down too!! And yes that is so sweet of your husband to keep that from you till later.
Oh.my.goodness! I’m nearly in tears at work for you! I can COMPLETELY understand where you are coming from. The dress is the one thing you should be able to keep 100% secret from your hubby-to-be!
That was SO SWEET of Mr. SB to fib to you about it.
I’m still in the planning phase, but I’m sure there will be a meltdown in my future! I cry at the drop of a hat! 
That is so sweet of Mr. Breezy! Mr. D is a terrible liar, I don’t even know if he could pull that off it he tried. I would’ve cried too, besides, doesn’t everyone need a good meltdown every once in awhile?
Mr. Breezy certainy did the right thing - good for him for recognizing that and saving your sanity. Yeah!
awww… that is absolutely so sweet of Mr. Breezy AND your friend J to tell you they hadn’t seen it. I’m 21 months away, but I probably won’t escape without my fair share of stressful moments…
Aww, you poor thing. I would be a mess then if I were you as well - more from frustration that someone else had messed up than anything.
And very sweet of your hubby to tell a fib. Although, if it helps at all, it’s hard for even me to tell from that pic what the dress would look like on, and I’m a girl that’s spent a long time looking at dresses! I’m sure your hubby just saw ‘white dress’.
And even if it did spoil the surprise, I’m sure nothing compared to when he actually saw you in it, as his bride.
The Mr. and I had our first pre-marital counseling session last night, and one of the things we talked about was whether or not it’s worth it to bend the truth to avoid conflict. Our consensus was that no, it’s best to be honest even if it will cause a tiff at the time. In this case, Mr. Breezy was right on the money and the conclusion we came to last night goes out the window. How lucky you are to have someone who knows and understands you well enough to have the right thing to say!
Oh … and I originally thought you were going to say that your room had been broken into and all your valuables stolen, so at least it wasn’t that!
Mr. Breezy is a keeper - good for you for having a meltdown and giving your planner the business!
I agree, Mr. Breezy is a total keeper. I can only guess when my melt down is going to be.
I think Mr. Breezy did the right thing too. I also think that the dress hanging there probably didn’t look half as good as it did ON YOU all dolled up for the wedding! So, it probably doesn’t even matter that he saw it!
I think my FI would have a meltdown - not me - if he saw the dress before The Day. He’s totally crazy about it. I like to tease him and say, “Do you want to see my dress? You sure?” Just to see him freak out. Heheh. (But way to go Breezy. What a cutie!)
EEK! Im sorry 
Your wedding coordinator sounds like a nightmare! I can spy white rose bouquets on your bed!!
Oooooooh boy! That is certainly all that is needed to send a bride into frantic tears, especially after all of the stress of planning that has been accumulating for so long! I would have broken down too!
And Mr. Breezy.. what a man to keep you from hurting any more. and he was able to get his joker buddy to help him out too! Sounds like he is a keeper… he knew how important it was to you & didn’t want you to feel any worse.
And, in reality, a dress looks TOTALLY different on, so although he might have caught a glimpse of it sprawled out on the bed, I’m sure it looked totally different ON. After all, we ladies sometimes think a dress looks great on the hanger, and it looks horrible on, or vice versa, so I’m sure Mr. Breezy had no way of conceptualizing what that mess of fabric on the bed would look like on you!
aaaaw maaaaan! That sucks, but truthfully I bet he had no idea what it would look like on you!
Ohmigoodness. My heart just fell, then it was brought back up again. Your hubs is the best! So romantic!
Awww what a sweet Mr. Breezy you have there My pre-wedding meltdown happened three days before the big event and had something to do with glue drying funny and smudging the print on our menus. It was not a big deal at. all. But like you I think all the stress of the planning just sort of erupted and I had a good (snot-filled) cry. I got it all out and it was smooth sailing after that
Oh, Breeze, I almost cried when I read your story. My heart felt squeezed. I could only imagine your thought as soon as you saw the dress and what a wonderful husband you have that he did the right thing and spared you more pain at that time.
P.S. LOVE the river of snot reference…hysterical!
Good move, Mr B! Glad it calmed down in the end. As I’m sure he later explained to you, seeing the dress and seeing the dress ON YOU are two entirely different things.
My mom actually had the wedding meltdown 
She got lost coming to met me and my MOH to get our make-up done. When I called to check in, she was BALLING. Even though she was only a couple of blocks away and five minutes late, she was momentarily convinced that she had single-handedly ruined my wedding day. After the wedding, she was really embarrassed about her freakout, but was calmed when my aunt assured her that she had done the same thing at her daughter’s wedding!
I think that prewedding meltdown helps to easy everything before the wedding so that there is no river of snot during the ceremony (not so romantic). But Mr. Breezy and his pal are sweet to let you think they didn’t see it. I bet as soon as they saw it they booked it out of there so they didn’t see much. Hopefully the hotel will make sure not to make that mistake again.
The fact that Mr. Breezy told you he didn’t see it is the sweetest thing he could’ve done in this wretched situation. I had tears in my eyes when I read that. I’m so sorry this happened to you!
I haven’t had a moment like that with the dress. He’s seen mine already and I’m not hiding a thing. It was more stress for me to do that. Instead I figure the day he sees me in it it will be totally different on, with hair, make up and jewelry. He doesn’t even remember that its’ strapless for Pete’s sake! However I totally understand the stress… I’m reaching the end of my tether!!
I definitely have the occasional meltdown - but if I have one around FI, he’s usually able to get me out of it by quoting Dane Cook’s line about having a big cry: “I tried my best!”. YouTube it if you haven’t seen it - I don’t even like Dane Cook but this bit is spot-on 
That sucks!!! And that’s a great reason for meltdown really. But I’ll agree with the others, seeing it hanging up and you wearing it are two totally different things! If he’s like my DH, he probably just noticed the color! LOL
@lou: @shibaby: @BeachBrideT: @peachypear: @lilythespitfire: You’re all right, it IS a different dress hanging up than on, and guys are typically even worse than we are at imagining what it’ll look like on. I wish I had access to all you guys when it happened! Maybe I could’ve spared myself some snot (a bit, anyway).
@2babc: Definitely true. It IS usually better to tell the truth but yes, I do think this case is an exception to the rule too.
Like the bees who came before you, your pre-wedding meltdown sounds downright cathartic. I find myself wondering what detail might send me over the edge — and almost wishing it would happen (just not TOO close to the wedding) so I can stop stressing over the little things as the big day approaches!
Boo! I’m so sorry that this happened to you, Breezy!
What a sweet thing for the mister to do though.
Aw that is so sweet of Mr. Breezy to have kept it from you!
Awww, what a sweetheart! That’s one of those little fibs that can be totally okay.
I’m sorry your planner screwed up on your dress’ delivery. I know I’d be just as upset!
I certainly had a pre-wedding breakdown…it was two months before the wedding, and I was at the florist picking out what I wanted for the bouquets and the reception centerpieces…two days after my now-husband and I had moved cross-country and umemployed. Needless to say, I was stressed out. When I couldn’t make a decision about the flowers, I felt like it was the end of the world! I almost started crying at the florist but managed to make it home before I had the COMPLETE breakdown. And afterwards, I felt fine, and while I really didn’t have a good idea of what our flowers were going to look like (I just couldn’t conceptualize them for some reason!), on the wedding day I absolutely loved them! Not to mention the fact that flowers were the last thing on my mind that day!
Please tell me they let you stay an extra night for free or something amazing for causing your meltdown…I so feel ya and I’m sorry that happened.
Oh my goodness, I cannot believe your wedding coordinator!!! Yes, it did look like a totally different dress on you (gorgeous!) and how smart of Mr. Breeze to know he needed to tell you he didn’t see it.
And sidebar - this is the first time I have seen Champ’s icon… I think she might officially be able to stomp Pengy!
Aww! I’m tearing up not just because he saw the dress pre-wedding, but because I too would find that incredible romantic! Mrs. SB, you’re a lucky lady.
Hm..I’m really not liking your wedding coordinator. But, awww Mr. Breezy was so right to do that. BTW, I’m loving your recaps…can’t wait to get to the actual wedding pics!
Oh man! That was VERY sweet of Mr. Breezy, but I hope that you gave that Sandra a piece of your mind! I’m looking forward to the rest of your wedding recaps, and am seriously considering writing a strongly worded letter about that coordinator on your behalf!
@armybride: Aw, thank you! Trust me, she knows how we felt about it. I’m over it - I just hope it won’t happen again, is all.
oh man, that would be awful! I know for sure that I will have some kind of meltdown moment since things like that seem to be pretty common in my life - when tons of things pile up and the one little thing finally sets me off.
I do have to say, however, that I do not think it was “the sweetest” for mr. breezy to lie to you. I firmly believe that even a “little white lie”, even if it seems to make things better, is still a lie. I guess I’m the only one who feels this way, but I would much rather know the truth, no matter how much it hurts, than find out later that the person I love lied to me. I am, however, glad that his response was one that comforted you and was the thing you would have liked him to do.
Anyway, I am anxiously awaiting the rest of your re-caps.
I think it shows how well he knows you, and that he really paid attention during the planning process. Incredibly sweet of him. You are such a fantastic writer SB!
Good job Mr. Breezy!! There was a point where I think Mr. PN may have seen a picture of me in my dress but he swares up in down that I pulled the camera out of his hand before he knew what he was looking at…. To this day I still don’t know if he ever saw it…
[...] DW in the DR: Pack It Up, Pack It In DW in the DR: Airport Confessions DW in the DR: Bienvenidos a Punta Cana DW in the DR: The Guest List Is In the Bag DW in the DR: The OOTs in Action DW in the DR: Planning the Reception DW in the DR: Planning the Flowers & Cake DW in the DR: Planning the Ceremony DW in the DR: Planning the Photography DW in the DR: Stag and Showerette DW in the DR: The Meltdown [...]
Oh my gosh I loved this story. I had a huge melt-down the day before my wedding. It’s a long story but the light in my closet burned out and so, while my mom and sister and BMs were making flowers i went to the closet to get a new lightbulb. The whole box of lightbulbs came crashing down on me. I wasn’t really hurt but I just started BAWLING. Lack of sleep, stress, etc. So been there. Thanks for making me feel better!
I did it about a week and a half before the wedding, and it was the standard future in-law stunt of deciding at the last minute to invite strangers to MY WEDDING.
I won in the end. But between the “oh, by the way, we told X, Y, and Z they might as well come because most of your family isn’t coming” email and the retraction several hours later, there was a lot of unpleasantness.
A few days later I told my boss this story, and she replied, “You’re in the home stretch now, and it’s only going to get worse.” Chipper!
OMG, the exact same thing happened to my sister for her wedding in Hawaii that we all just went to in December! Only she didn’t realize until she was re-tracing the events of the night before the wedding, and realized that her hubby came into their condo with his boys while the girls were out to dinner and her dress was hanging in the living room. They apparently walked right by it (they were having a few bachelor party cocktails….ok A LOT of them) and he didn’t even notice it. And he maintains that story to this day!
hella late, i know, but i wanna kick your coordinator’s ass right now. good thing you’re so loved breezay!
What do they say, a good man is hard to find? Lucky u who’s man cares so much about u to spare your feelings ( but then admit the truth later) - perfect combo.
On a side note, I love how someone (YSAP) is i spying the flowers. Im still DYING for the the conclusion to that saga!
[...] DW in the DR: Pack It Up, Pack It In DW in the DR: Airport Confessions DW in the DR: Bienvenidos a Punta Cana DW in the DR: The Guest List Is In the Bag DW in the DR: The OOTs in Action DW in the DR: Planning the Reception DW in the DR: Planning the Flowers & Cake DW in the DR: Planning the Ceremony DW in the DR: Planning the Photography DW in the DR: Stag and Showerette DW in the DR: The Meltdown [...]
[...] DR: Planning the Ceremony DW in the DR: Planning the Photography DW in the DR: Stag and Showerette DW in the DR: The Meltdown DW in the DR: Final Touches DW in the DR: The Guys Get Groomed DW in the DR: The Girls Get [...]
[...] DR: Planning the Ceremony DW in the DR: Planning the Photography DW in the DR: Stag and Showerette DW in the DR: The Meltdown DW in the DR: Final Touches DW in the DR: The Guys Get Groomed DW in the DR: The Girls Get Gorgeous [...]
[...] DR: Planning the Ceremony DW in the DR: Planning the Photography DW in the DR: Stag and Showerette DW in the DR: The Meltdown DW in the DR: Final Touches DW in the DR: The Guys Get Groomed DW in the DR: The Girls Get Gorgeous [...]
[...] DR: Planning the Ceremony DW in the DR: Planning the Photography DW in the DR: Stag and Showerette DW in the DR: The Meltdown DW in the DR: Final Touches DW in the DR: The Guys Get Groomed DW in the DR: The Girls Get Gorgeous [...]
[...] DR: Planning the Ceremony DW in the DR: Planning the Photography DW in the DR: Stag and Showerette DW in the DR: The Meltdown DW in the DR: Final Touches DW in the DR: The Guys Get Groomed DW in the DR: The Girls Get Gorgeous [...]
[...] DR: Planning the Ceremony DW in the DR: Planning the Photography DW in the DR: Stag and Showerette DW in the DR: The Meltdown DW in the DR: Final Touches DW in the DR: The Guys Get Groomed DW in the DR: The Girls Get Gorgeous [...]
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Mrs. Sea Breeze, Vancouver/Dominican Republic
Age in 2008 and Occupation: 30, Communications Manager
Fiance's Age in 2008 and Occupation: 29, Experiential Marketing Director
Engagement Date: October 6, 2007
Wedding Date: November, 2008
Blogging Since: July 17, 2008
Venue: Majestic Colonial Resort, Punta Cana
About Me: Planning a destination wedding by the sea should be (oh no she di-in't…) a breeze (…*sigh* yep, she did) but when you've never been to the Caribbean, your powers of imagination are really put to the test. Luckily, I'm 90% resourceful, creative optimist (and kooky, neurotic practicalist-if-that's-a-word for the other ten). Other than writing about our week-long celebration of family, friends, laughter and love, I adore books, shoes and… you guessed it… long walks on the beach.
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