Wedding Blog
I’ve noticed that we’ve had a lot of trouble finding balance when it comes to planning big day.
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One of the biggest decisions that a couple makes is where they are going to live post-wedding. For Mr. BF and I, the decision was simple. We both loved Baton Rouge, and despite my New Orleans roots, I was ready and eager to move out there permanently. The problem was in timing. When should I make the move? My dilemma was difficult… I had a great job in NOLA, I had the vacation time needed for the honeymoon, and really got along well with some of my coworkers. However, I realized I didn’t want to change jobs and get married at the same time, so last fall, I decided to put my resume out there.
Well, I found a job and moved out to Baton Rouge. The dilemma now? No vacation time… I started at zero. That’s right, how am I going to enjoy a 9-day vacation with Mr. BF knowing that it won’t be completely paid? Well, doing the math in the beginning, I figured only two days would be unpaid. Simple enough. However, with the wedding in the New Orleans area, there are things that have to get done on weekdays to keep my sanity on safe level. The drive alone from New Orleans to Baton Rouge is about 1.5 hours each way, so whenever I need to go down there, that’s 3 hours of vacation time gone, just for travel!
My dress alone is pretty PTO (paid time off) consuming. The store I purchased it from in the New Orleans area only has alterations from 10-2 on Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday. I could go Saturday, but store employees and local Knotties have informed me that this is bridezilla central. I’m not really much for crowds, so I have to take days off to get fitted and refitted, and with this weight loss, it won’t be easy.
I’m sure there will be other days where I’ll need to go back down to take care of the little things, but really hive, please tell me I’m not the only bride facing this dilemma! I’m really looking forward to the honeymoon, but I feel awful that some of it will be unpaid!
How are you handling your vacation time and your wedding/honeymoon?
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Oy! I just took a new job (I gave notice yesterday), and I have three weeks of vacation for the next two years!!! Which means I can go home to Maine from Las Vegas, where I live, for a week to plan. And then I can take a week for the wedding and a week for a honeymoon. And then I’m done… For another 14 months. Ugh.
I’m actually lucky! Next year (the yr of our wedding) will be my 5th yr at my job and I get three weeks of vacation. So I’m taking two off for the wedding and I’ll have one left for later. But i hear you about losing weight. I havent tried on dresses yet…i have about 3 more months till I try them on…so Im trying to really push myself into gear before I try on dresses…and I know I’ll be able to lose some weight before I go in for a 2nd and final time hopefully! Good luck Miss Ballet.
I have some PTO hours that rolled over from last year, and my job is pretty flexible - as long as I work 40 hours a week, I can work overtime on one day and take a few hours off the next. That said, I’m trying to keep work and wedding separate, so I’m scheduling as much as I can on evenings and weekends, crowds be damned!
oh gosh, this was something I haven’t even thought of…I have NO IDEA what we’re going to do…let alone where we’re living/working etc. oh dear….great post, I wouldn’t have thought about this….
Oh I feel you it was depressing realizing when January started I was working every day until before my wedding…. I at least can earn off the book days off but I would love some days to settle some wedding related task
This is definitely something I’ve been thinking about since before we even got engaged!!! We just had to miss a wonderful family vacation to sail the British Virgin Islands with my fiance’s family because of my lack of vacation days!! My fiance’s company gives him plenty of days so it’s not an issue for him, but I only get 10 days for the year. Technically I am not supposed to “carry over” days into a new year, but my wedding being January 2 I have gotten special permission from my manager that I am able to carry a few of my days into the next year. But that doesn’t really help since I want to take a 10 day honeymoon!! It’s super frustrating, and I wouldn’t really mind taking it unpaid (thankfully we can afford that) but I dont think it’s an option at my workplace. How frustrating!
I actually have PTO, and it’s a pretty weird experience. I’ve been a contractor for years, paid for every hour I worked, and not for any that I didn’t. My husband is still a contractor. I “went over to the dark side” and took a job with a larger company when we got serious, as we had been living halfway across the country from each other, and the company I now work for has a fantastic move policy.
We are going on our honeymoon next week, and while I get paid for the time, he doesn’t. As far as we’re concerned it’s just part of the cost of the honeymoon; you factor it in. At least the issue is only that he doesn’t get paid, as opposed to being that either of us were in a position where it was not okay to take time off at all…
A really nice thing when I was planning is that we get every other Friday off. Of course, we work 9 hours a day Mon-Thurs, but still it’s great to have that day. You might investigate with your boss whether you can alter your work schedule so that you put in some extra time to make up for the half-day excursions you have to make. My boss is generally good that way - plus when he knows I’ve been working late, he will often tell me to take half a day of my choice sometime in the near future.
Ugh, this sucks! I have a really great boss who let me leave early a few times for dress fittings and such so I was really lucky. What if you log some hours elsewhere, say if you take an afternoon off, could you make up for it on the weekend?
We actually are really fortunate in this area. We’re getting married close to home, and most things can be done in evenings and weekends - I have yet to take off during the day for wedding stuff. My year rolls over in June, and I think I’m up to 3 weeks now, but it might still be 2. Our weddings in October, and my boss will let me carry over a couple days from this period. Even if I don’t, I’ll still have a couple days to work after the wedding. And FH’s year is in August, and he’ll get 2 weeks so we can use his up this summer and still be ok. I wish you luck, and hope that you find a way to work it out!
Well, I’ll be starting a new job so I’m sure that it will have to be unpaid.
Couldn’t you take time off for the dress that’s not paid, so you can space it out over paychecks, rather than having none left by the time your honeymoon rolls around?
Great post! Since we are have a destination wedding then a honeymoon, I am taking 2 weeks off. We also have a few other trips planned for this year & I don’t have that much vacation!
I just decided to take off the 2 weeks as unpaid. I think it’s a hassle for our HR guru, but she’s also one of my good friends, so I hope she doesn’t mind!
Oh man! This does not sound like a fun way to figure things out. I agree with mandalynn17… I would suggest saving your two days for the honeymoon- if you need to take time off for NOLA stuff before hand, I would say take some early days where you leave at 11:30. (if you got to the dress shop a little after 1, this would be a good bet!) If you take a day everyone once in a while, or a half day off, not paid- it won’t reflect as much as having nine days off no pay. So, turn that 9 into seven (which only helps a little, i know) and use your PTO then. Also- remember, you will most likely be receiving some cash around your wedding day that will help you battle the “no income” thing.
I’m in a similar boat…I started a new job last summer and am slooooowly accumulating time off. If I take NO PTO before my wedding day in September, then I *might* just have enough earned to take a few days off before the wedding and go on a week long honeymoon. It’s just hard knowing that I have no days off until September. But it’ll all be worth it!
This is a big unknown for me right now. I will be moving in with my FI (only 2 hours away from Toronto and my job) in 2 months, and will ask my boss if I could work from home. If he doesn’t agree I will need to find a new job and have no vacation time. The good thing is we haven’t booked our honeymoon yet so I guess we could postpone it.
I think in the end you’ll have so much fun on the honeymoon that it being unpaid won’t matter. 
Oh man, that’s too bad. I only get limited vacation time, but I can go “in the hole” on it. So if I come back with -20 hours, I just have to earn it back later.
Could you take “sick” time to do some of your bridal errands, or is it all lumped together for you?
I started a new job just after we got engaged. I will have some days off but will need to take some of the honeymoon as unpaid leave. My fiance is lucky and has almost a whole month off around our wedding!
I do most of my wedding planning in the evenings and on the weekends. I do have to take 3 days this month to go to North Carolina (where our wedding is) to finalize plans and chose the last of our vendors.
I’m actually moving from BR to NO this summer. My wedding is in April and I’m just finishing my MBA. Things are crazy. I just got a new job and my wedding date is in the ‘busy’ season.. but I get vacation so no complaining. On top of that.. I didn’t realize a certain bridal store only offers alterations on specific days (oversight on my part). I took a vacation day to go to said bridal store in NO yesterday only to be turned away b/c it wasn’t a Monday, Wednesday, Friday or Saturday - and it def wasn’t b/w 10 & 2!
I couldn’t imagine doing all this wedding stuff with no vacay. Good luck!
Our fiscal year starts June 1, and with a late August wedding, I’ll likely be a-okay with vacation days…but I’ll by using most within the first three months of the fiscal year! I’m afraid I won’t have many to spread through the remaining nine months!
I can’t complain about my vacation, I just have a suggestion - Could you have the dress altered somewhere closer to where you live?
@Mrs. Sea Breeze: Unfortunately, I work in an office that has rigid hours. So, my boss isn’t at all flexible with hours.
@mandalynn17: Nope, I have to use paid before I can get into unpaid. Another system thing…blah!
@AliCherri1: Well, the alterations are included with my bridal shop. So, I’d rather stick with them.
I won’t have paid since I recently became an hourly employee again.
I got lucky to start a new job with lots of vacation days, but they don’t seem so many when I’m also planning a wedding that’s also 1.5 hours away with a strict hourly schedule. My fiance is a teacher and he gets all kinds of snow days and of course, summers off.
I bought my dress on a Saturday against advice and with an appointment it was fine. I plan to do the same for my alterations so maybe killing that fear can help out some. . . .
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Mrs. Ballet Flat, New Orleans
Age and Occupation: 24, Geographic Information Systems Analyst
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, IT Analyst
Engagement Date: March 16, 2008
Wedding Date: May, 2009
Blogging Since: September 25, 2008
Venue: St. Charles Borromeo Church/Jefferson-Orleans North
About Me: I absolutely love wedding planning, spending time with Mr. Ballet Flat, various crafts, watching football, baking, pop music, bargain hunting and ice cream. My idea of a great date night is dinner and clearance shopping with Mr. Ballet Flat! I currently live below sea level in the suburbs near New Orleans, where I make maps all day, everyday for my job. I'm slowly becoming more and more obsessed with anything New Orleans related for our wedding, and I can't wait for the big day!
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