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Y’all know how much I like analogies, right? And that I’m bound and determined to carry them through to their last wheezing gasps? Boy, do I have a treat for you.
{If you’re related to me, please stop reading. Now. Seriously. Please?}
Today, we’re going to talk about Brazil. And it’s not to see this guy.
Nor is it even about the country.
(Think about it.)
(Got it yet?)
(A, ha! There you go. Now you get it.)
Yup. As the queen of all things uncomfortable, I’m blogging about the removal of lawn from every last corner of the country. (Don’t say I didn’t warn you that the analogy was going to be pretty cheesy.)
Tomorrow, I’m going in for my first ever Brazilian (again, not talking about Helio). I’m taking Mrs. Caramel’s advice to heart… and taking an aspirin. Chalk it up to yet another one of those crazy things we women do for men and grooming, and blame it on the fact that I didn’t have any better ideas for a Valentine’s Day gift.
Lest you think I’m a hussy for giving this as a gift, may I remind you that we women have been known to kindly help our guys eat better, dress better, and (tell the truth!) groom better? Honestly, it would be different if he’d asked for it, or even mentioned it, but since it’s a surprise of my choosing, I’m fine with it. And I hear it’s pretty awesome, if a little, ahem, breezy.
I’ll report back when it’s over. Have you been to Brazil? Any last minute suggestions for me and my low pain threshold?
Good luck!! Can’t wait to hear how it went. I haven’t ever been there!
You should take ibruprofen instead. It is an anti-inflamatory and asprin thins the blood to a greater extent so probably isn’t best. Good Luck!
I’ve heard good and bad about “going to Brazil”… I keep thinking about that one SATC episode when they all talk about going to Brazil… HA! Good luck, Miss Cheese!!!!
LOL, you never fail to entertain, M. Cheese! I can’t say I’ve ever been on a Brazilian adventure, but I’m anxious to hear about yours. 
Yes ibuprofen. And if you can, a trim is a good idea too, if its too long it hurts more (although not too short or the wax can’t get it!)
I’ve never been to Brazil, but I agree with Julie about the ibuprofen!
you slay me. you are so funny with your analogies. i did go to brazil a few weeks before the wedding. the woman that was my “tour guide” was amazing. she started with the worst part (i swear i didn’t think i would be able to do it after that first rrrrriiiiiiiiiiippppppppppp, then she said that was the worst of it.) and everything else was super easy after that. however, it was by no means a pleasure trip.
good luck!
I have indeed been to Brazil, in fact, I am a regular visitor, and I recommend exhaling as each strip is pulled off. Whether it’s just a distraction or serves some actual physical pain-dulling purpose, I think it makes it hurt less.
Also, wear comfortable underwear (i.e. no thongs) because that area is going to be a wee bit sensitive post-wax. If you’re concerned about ingrown hairs after the wax, I suggest exfoliating and either Tend Skin or Bikini Zone.
Enjoy your trip, and good luck!
I just went the first time a week and a half ago - I am a big fan! I find normal waxes to range from not painful at all to excruciating, so I had no idea what to expect on the pain scale, but I took my Advil and marched myself there. It wasn’t that bad! It lasted a while and was a little awkward, but I picked a place that I had been to often before, which is a no-frills place. The boy responded positively. I would keep it up if it didn’t cost so much…
Wow. Just when I thought you couldnt top your Twister analogy.. you bring on Brazil. While I haven’t been all the way to Brazil… I’ve made it halfway there. I must say it does make the game of Twister more intense. Its even better without all that lawn in the way. hahaha. Good luck Cheese!
This post was delayed, so I’m actually going TODAY. In four. short. hours. Yikes.
@chemchopity: hahahahh tour guide - nice
You know my recommendation - I’m all about the Anthony Ingrown hair treatment. I won’t go to brazil without it
A couple of tips! I’m an esthetician/ make up artist and these are things i’ve told my clients.
take advil it’s an anti inflamatory.
Do not exfoliate that night but do exfoliate every day after. You can get exfoliating gloves from the dollar store.. those work awesome!
Don’t use any lotions or creams in that area the first day, it can cause ingrown hairs.
Uh.. playing twister the day you get it done could be uncomfortable and cause chafing.. yeah.. I had to say it.
And don’t wear nice underwear because you could get wax on it.. a thong is probably best!
And I don’t know if you’ve had bikinis done before but brazilians hurt like a mofo.. but remember it hurts less every time and the hair eventually thins out and less grows back in.
Hope these tips help!
@MissCamera: ROFL.
@Angela: Thank. You. *taking deep breaths*
Ouch. I’m not sure I want to ever visit Brazil. But, congrats on your bravery!
You and I are clearly made for eachother. Meatballs and Cheese! I love your brave topics!
Miss Cheese, here’s the real deal. I just went for the first time this week. (you will probably get red bumps and be sore for a day or so!)
It’s painful. It’s so painful. I cringed a lot and the aesthetician kept asking if I was ok.
However, a week later, I have to say I love it! I don’t know if I’ll ever go back, but it’s seems a little like child birth(hah!)–it’s painful but you’ll forget the pain with the final result!
I’m sure Mr. Cheese will love it!
Don’t worry, Miss Cheese! I went to Brazil for the first time last year, and I liked it so much that now I go every six weeks! I was terrified to go the first time, but I recall walking out thinking that it was not nearly as bad as I had thought, and I love the results! Some tips I might provide from my year of experience:
- Take Tylenol an hour before
- Avoid caffeine until after the wax
- If the wax feels hot, say something. It might be the right temperature, but it’s good to let the asthetician know so they can double-check. (I’ve never had bruising or anything like that from wax being too hot though, like Mrs. Carmel said she did).
- Pick up a tube of hydrocortisone if you feel any discomfort after
- Try to go to a salon that specializes in brazilians and/or waxing
Good luck, don’t worry too much and enjoy the results!
Strangely, I never mind the pain. It’s that kind of “satisfying” pain that though you’re strangely uncomfortable, you know you’ll be happy with the results. And yes, be aware of the heat–if it’s too hot, TELL HER!
Just breathe.
Good luck! I’m thinking about going to Brazil before the wedding, so be sure to report back!
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Mrs. Cheese, Knoxville Age and Occupation: 29, Engineering Manager Fiance's Age and Occupation: 27, CAD Designer Engagement Date: July 31, 2008 Wedding Date: May, 2009 Blogging Since: October 16, 2008 Venue: Our home and the two acres it sits on About Me: I’m an emotional girl who loves sentimental things, parenthetical asides, and trying to do things herself. I can cook, sew, am a whiz at planning, terrible at delegating, and totally in love with my fiancé (who will be my second husband but first love of the rest of my life). For our home/ garden/ DIY wedding, we’ll be moonlighting as interior designers, home improvers, and gardeners with the help of our fabulous friends and neighbors. We can’t wait to be married, and are learning how fun getting married can be.
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