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Since I have been engaged, one of the most common questions I’ve been asked is, “Have you found your dress?” or some variation of that question. I usually respond with, “No, I haven’t even gone shopping yet. I’m not sure what I am looking for.” And it is true. I’ve been engaged since May, but have not gone dress shopping yet. Why? Well, first of all I am so busy and I often do not know what my schedule will be, so I don’t make the appointment at the dress shop. I want to lose weight and have worried that the dresses will look different once I do so. I think this is me just delaying, because I want to lose 15 pounds, and that probably won’t make too much of a difference.
In all of my wedding planning, I think I enjoy the things that aren’t “me” oriented. I love planning the decor, colors, details, stationery and graphics. I love planning and creating things for others to enjoy. But I don’t like being the center of attention (I can’t stand the Happy Birthday song on my birthday, for example) and so I feel weird about doing the part that revolves around me. I know that as the bride, all eyes will be on me, but that is a little nerve wracking. So maybe even the idea of being on a pedestal in a bridal salon with all eyes on me is even scarier.
The biggest reason is probably that I really don’t know what I want. I haven’t imagined a specific look in my head, so the idea of hundreds and hundreds of dresses is overwhelming. I browse all my bridal magazines and see things I like, but I’m still unsure. I’m not sure what will look good on me since I am not a 6 foot tall model. There is so much pressure to find “the dress” and I think I have shied away from that big decision. I love shopping though, so I am going to focus on that and having fun, instead of worrying about the pressure to find “the one”.
So now that I am done with the in-depth explanation of why I have not found my dress yet, I wanted to at least post some pictures of what I like. (Not that I can necessarily afford these dresses, but that’s a different story).
Amalia Carrara (Probably not in pink, but I like the neckline and folds)
I think I love anything that Abby at Style Me Pretty posts, but here are some different posts on dresses that have stood out in my memory…
Christina by Junko Yoshioka
The Quarry by Lela Rose
Photos Style Me Pretty
Elena by Junko Yoshioka (top left)
Mica by Junko Yoshioka (top right)
Lizzie by Stephanie James
Photos: Style Me Pretty
I’d love it if you gave me your feedback, or have any suggestions for designers or dresses you think I
should look at.
What was your dress shopping experience like? Does it make anyone else nervous?
Sigh. That Sottero & Midgley makes my heart skip a beat every time I see it. Wish I would have tried it on before I bought mine. I love mine, but that one just takes my breath away!
It seems you like strapless, lace, and melissa sweet.
If I weren’t wearing my ML lace dress, I’d LOVE to wear the new melissa sweet Tilda -
http://www.priscillaofboston.com/dress_detail.jsp?gid=20&sfid=50615
I agree with August15bride…I fell in love with the Sottero & Midgely, but when I went to try it on, I saw a similar dress by a smaller designer and tried them both on! Amazingly the smaller *cheaper* designer’s dress fit WAY better because of the way it was cut in the hips 
The Oscar de la Renta with the pink sash is amazing! Definitely “dream wedding” material.
I procrastinated about dress shopping, too. I wanted to lose weight and just generally wasn’t into it. After a little introspection, I realized it was the major “thing” I needed to do for the wedding- everything else was a minor detail and easy to accomplish. As soon as the dress was purchased, the wedding planning was virtually over.
hahaha, you’re all over the place! 
you’re in for one very hard decision!
i absolutely love Melissa Sweet Cosimma =]. I was so close to splurging back when I was looking. Love the rouching and assymetricalness (is that a word?) of it.
Anyway, after I’d bought my dress…here I am months later and I found this: http://www.preownedweddingdresses.com/dresses/5993/Melissa-Sweet-Cosimma—New-2008-style-Size-4.html
Thought I’d share…just in case! =]
Happy hunting!
Oooh I like you. You’re a texture gal, just like me! All those ruffles and tiers and pleats and puffs and lace… love!
I think once you actually go try dresses on, you will be able to narrow it down more. You’ll find out that there are certain styles that will look better on you, and also hopefully be able to pick out a few features that you want in a dress. I’d also say, try to keep an open mind. A dress that might not seem “you,” may end up looking great on you.
I absolutely hate shopping, especially when you must find a dress/outfit. But I felt like dress shopping was so much easier. There are so many styles, and so many beautiful dresses.
Also, I hate being the center of attention. I did not enjoy being up in front of everyone during the wedding. But picking out the dress wasn’t bad at all. I just went with my mom, and we went to a small boutique. There was only one sales lady with us, and we had the area to ourselves, which was nice.
I tried on the second Monique Lhuillier at the Saks sample sale yesterday. I felt like it was a good first experience– I picked out the dresses I wanted from the racks (definitely tried some things that look bleh on the hanger too!) and no one was speeding me through an appointment or futzing about my budget. The important thing for me was to see the shapes.
If you’re near a Saks with a bridal department, I’d suggest starting there, just for a hassle-free first time.
Don’t feel pressured once you start trying dresses on. I’ve actually tried on tons of dresses, and didn’t feel like any of them are “the one”. I’m actually scared I’ve got too high expectations for finding “the one” since everyone kept telling me I “would just know”. I might be able to find it if my budget were infinite!
I’ve taken a leap and ordered something online that I’ve never seen in person or tried on. Out of all the dresses I’ve looked at and tried on, it’s the only one that’s made my heart flutter.
Having been with 2 brides (daughters) during their shopping experience, I know that is different for each person and it is easy to get caught up in it. One of my daughters found the dress on her first shopping trip even though she tried to resist it. The other felt like a “cake topper” in everything she tried on and had more trouble finding something that suited her. What I WILL advise is that you can save tons of money AND get the dress you want if you are willing to buy a preowned dress. Just know what you want and your precise measurements and search the web…there are several websites available. Most of all, have a great time! You will look gorgeous that day!
The most important advice I have for you is start shopping ! It might take you longer than you think AND figuring out what dresses/designers you like will help you find a better deal, whether it’s sample sale, trunk show or preowned dress (if you are open to it).
Also, be aware that you might not have THE ONE moment. When I started shopping I tried on a lot of dresses ( by the time I bought mine, it totalled maybe 30) and could narrow it down to final 2-4 dresses per visit. I would have been happy to get married in either of those, which obviously doesn’t help since you only need one. I kept hearing about girls crying and having this big emotional moment but it was not coming for me even though I was in love with the dress. Realizing that it’s not going to happen for me helped me make a decision. I kept coming back to the same dress by Amsale that I eventually bought. Everybody is different and it will help you if you recognize it and embrace it.
Good luck shopping !
I love the Vera Wang and Vineyard Collection gowns.
you have such a variety of taste…I can’t wait see your final choice!
I am in a very similar situation. I’ve been engaged since April of last year, and I have yet to enter a bridal store. I look at bridal gowns online and in magazines, still not knowing what I want. The ones that win me over are way out of my price range.
So I took my first step yesterday and went to the sample sale at Goodwill that Mrs. Cupcake mentioned on Friday. Although I didn’t find any designer dresses that fit my style, I did come across an amazing vintage dress. It was the first wedding dress I tried on, and I bought it for a mere $25. It’s not the “one,” but the experience helped me gain the confidence and courage I need to get on track. Now I cannot wait to try on more dresses at real bridal stores.
The one consistent thing I noticed in a lot of the dresses you have pictured have sweetheart necklines, so that *may* narrow things down a bit for you?
Have fun shopping and go with something that flatters you, and that you feel beautiful in AND that you feel comfortable in!
I love that first Lela Rose dress! Can’t wait to see what you select. 
Wow, they are all stunning, but the last one is unbelievable!!!
I was the same way… I put off dress shopping, then when I finally went, I took my bridesmaids with me and focused on finding their dresses the whole time! They made me try some on finally when we left, but I wasn’t into it. So much so that I tried on my dress that night, and didn’t have the “moment”, because my nerves were completely shot lol!
Good luck, I know you will find something amazing.
Take a look at the Casablanca 1870 — it is similar to the second Vineyard Collection dress you posted.
Oh — and the Casablanca looks WAY better in person than it does on the website, I promise!
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Mrs. Duckling, San Diego Age and Occupation: 23, Psychology Grad Student, Youth Diversion Specialist/Marriage and Family Therapy Trainee and an Executive Assistant Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Marketing and PR Coordinator Engagement Date: May 17, 2008 Wedding Date: September 2009 Venue: Rancho Bernardo Inn About Me: I'm currently living in Orange County, but planning our wedding in my hometown of San Diego. We are a DIY wedding "2fer", as I'm the crafty one and Mr. Ducky is in charge of all of our graphic design and technical aspects. When not wedding planning or reading wedding blogs, I'm attending grad school and rotating between two different jobs to keep things exciting. My favorite things include shoes, Post-Its, Labrador Retrievers, traveling, psychology, delicious food, photography, reading, craft gadgets/supplies, and of course, my wonderful Mr. Ducky!
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