Wedding Blog
On one particular day this past week, I received two emails from readers asking why we don’t have any African American Bees. That same day, I received another email asking why there were so many Asian and Caucasian bloggers on Weddingbee. We get a lot of emails from readers requesting that we feature bloggers of a certain ethnicity, geographic region, budget, religion or gender. We haven’t blogged about diversity and the hive since May 2007, so I thought it was about time to revisit the topic.
While we’d love to have the most diverse hive possible, we can really only select bloggers from our pool of applicants, so our Bees are indicative of the type of applications we receive. In the past, we’ve encouraged bloggers of all different backgrounds to apply, but other than that, we don’t have too much control over the types of brides (and grooms) that apply.
So how do we decide who becomes a Bee? Well the Bees help us decide — they know what it’s like to be a Weddingbee blogger better than anyone. 
While we do look at many different factors when evaluating applications, ultimately it comes down to the quality of the blog. We’re not going to turn a blogger away because their demographic is already represented on Weddingbee. And we’re also not going to accept a blogger who has a weak blog for the sake of diversity. Do you think this is a good policy?
We’ve had Caucasian, Asian, Southeast Asian, African American, Hispanic, groom, lesbian, bisexual, plus-size, Jewish, Christian, Catholic, Mormon, British, Canadian, encore brides, brides with children, big budget and small budget bloggers on Weddingbee. I hope that we’ve made it clear that potential Bees of any and every background always have been and always will be welcome!
Is the diversity of the Weddingbee bloggers something you think about? Do you think we need to be taking specific steps to make the hive more diverse? If so, what? We’d love to hear your thoughts!
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Share this post: Weddingbee and Diversity, Part II
I have thought it strange that it does seem to be predominantly Asian and Caucasian bloggers at the moment. But, I thought it probably just comes in waves. For example, if you have a lot of Asian American (or any other group) bees blogging at one time, that would lead to more Asian American bees finding the site and wanting to blog on it. The site is extremely diverse but it would be nice to have it even more so.
I would guess that your bloggers represent your demographic.
However, as Weddingbee expands, I think it would be good business practice (and good for the hive) to expand that demographic.
If you can recruit bloggers from un- (or under) represented bees you might be able to bring their readers into the hive as well
On some other blogs I’ve read, they’ve asked readers to nominate bloggers that they read elsewhere to join the community. Perhaps you could have a nomination process for a new round of Bees (with a focus on unique perspectives- be they gender, sexual orientation, religion, race, etc)? (I think you did something on the boards looking for Pros)
I think it’s something to keep in mind. I’ve noticed several times the large quantity of Asian bees, and the near non-existence of African American ones. I’ve also thought it would be nice to see more gay and lesbian weddings. I also get the overall impression (though someone with real data is free to contradict) that the average bee wedding budget is a little on the high end.
As much as we’d all love it if it did, diversity won’t magically come on its own. You have to have diversity to attract diversity, which means that if it’s something that you decide is important, you will need to actively seek it– maybe not by accepting weaker applications, but by doing some active recruitment for good ones.
rosychicklet - The problem with asking bloggers to join Weddingbee is that it’s a huge commitment, and we really want bloggers that are serious and able to make that commitment.
We could definitely start threads asking for specific types of brides/grooms. Do you guys think we should do that?
Also Pros are a little different because they always say yes. 
@Julie: Very true that diversity attracts diversity. Brides see a Bee like themselves on Weddingbee, and they apply. The reason why we’ve had so few African American brides is probably because we haven’t had many AA brides, so we get virtually no applications from them.
Do you have any ideas on how we could actively recruit diverse bloggers with strong blogs?
It has crossed my mind . . .
I would love to see bloggers who represent lots of different views. For example, when I first read that Mrs. Avocado was LDS, I did a doubletake (sorry, but true). However, when I took the time to read all that she posted about herself, the ceremony, and the beautiful symbolism of her religious beliefs - I LOVED EVERY MOMENT! In fact, it has become one of my favorite blogs because it is so rich and full of meaning and I feel like I learn something each time.
I understand that the hive is only as diverse as its members, but maybe the beekeepers might want to focus on ways to encourage different bees to join and let their voices be heard!
@Mrs.Bee- I suggested the ‘nomination’ type process because I’ve seen it work on other blog communities to recruit new people.
If a bride is blogging elsewhere (enough for Weddingbee readers to be aware of them) they may be willing to join the Hive.
You can always make the commitment known to them and give them the option of refusing.
You could also try something- like have the nominees guest blog for a week and then have readers vote or something? (The voting may actually draw a lot of the nominee’s blog followers over to Weddingbee if they are eager to support him/her and help increase Hive diversity that way)
Mrs. Bee,
Thanks for writing this. I’m glad you’ve come out and really addressed this. I have to admit that I have been a bit upset at times because I really do love this site, but as Black woman I feel wholy underrepresented amongst the bloggers here. I think the lack of diversity in terms of Black/African American bees to some degree may deepen the lack of applicants. If you don’t see yourself represented, then you might feel that you may not be welcomed. I do agree with your policy though. I’d rather someone here with quality blogging skills than for any other reason. While I have been pretty hesitant to apply, I may reconsider. Thanks again for being open about this.
Thanks so much for your feedback and suggestions — we are definitely taking it all in!
caribqueen — you should definitely apply!
I don’t know how you can best diversify the blogs. Honestly, I think you have to look at the demographics of people who usually DO blog. Based on that- how many of them are blogging about their weddings?
Honestly, you can only work with what you get in applications. I am not complaining. I can see how you try really hard to work with what you have.
And I joined weddingbee back before the whole (ah-hem) merger… and the integrity you maintain to keep up this blogsite is incredible. I give you kudos for that.
Just work with what you get- and hopefully the blog itself will continue to inspire future bloggers…
**as a side note… I never considered to apply to this site because I do not have a personal blog & I know that is a ‘pre-requisite’. But- I would have loved to have applied and shared my wedding process. I am Puerto Rican and my Fiance is Taiwanese- so I wonder… how many other culturally diverse brides would be willing to be featured who don’t have personal blogs, but are tech savvy, and willing to share? Just a thought.
@Sparkles: I don’t have specific data I can reference, but I do believe that certain demographics are more likely to blog. The demographics of sites like Facebook and Xanga tend to support that theory.
Sparkles: I agree, I think WB just represents the demographics that are out there blogging. I’m not quite sure how to encourage others to apply but for me (I’m a Boston girl marrying an Australian, living in Sydney and planning a destination wedding in Hawaii) I don’t have a personal blog and that is the only thing stopping me from applying! I just have no idea how to start my own blog, I checked out Xanga but it couldn’t figure it out. And didn’t see the point of starting a random blog out in cyberland that no one (cept maybe a few friends) would see. I want to share with other people that are just as wedding obsessed as me.
Right- so if certain demographics are more likely to blog- then that is why your site represents mostly those demographics. Your ‘pre-reqs’ are for people who have personal blogs and maintain them. so that right there- narrows the pool down further. A) they have to blog & B) are they blogging about their wedding? all I am saying is- if Caribqueen wants to see more Black/African American bees, how many of them blog? and how many of those who do are in the middle of the wedding process? So… either you are willing to have people who don’t blog but accept them because they are willing to share, then that is something to consider… I understand blogging is a different type of conversing with an audience. But… for those who feel under-represented, it’s a matter of evaluating how much that demographic blog. period. Weddingbee isn’t indicative of not wanting AA or Hispanics etc who are brides be featured. It correlates with the who do blog. Am I making sense?
i do think there is diversity among the current batch, even though racially it may be a little skewed towards Asian/Caucasian.
but we do have 2nd marriages, ladies whose grooms are remarrying / have children, age diversity (from 23 to 36) and varying budgets - although i do concede that it seems that many of the Bees have more substantial budgets.
however, i don’t think there should be a deliberate sense of seeking out ‘minority’ brides, because that’s sorta like, reverse discrimination?
when all’s said and done, i just want to say that i’m a happy reader of weddingbee because it brings all brides-to-be together, for us to share in each other’s planning process regardless of locale, ethnicity, budget or style.
thanks Mrs Bee, for the fantastic concept!
I read in a business book once that managers tend to hire and promote employees that are similar in background and socio-economic situation to themselves. Not to slag you mrs. Bee, but maybe your subconcious plays a role in what bees end up making the cut? Also, maybe you can share with us what defines a “good” blog from a “weak” one? Maybe if the rules of applying were more defined, that would make things simpler for people of all backgrounds to have an equal chance to become a bee! Although I really think you are off to a good start by asking everyone their opinions!
aloweha- I read your entry after I submitted mine- And I totally am on the same page as you are. If I blog- no one is going to look at my blog except my fam (in Puerto Rico) and my grad school friends and maybe some random co-workers and maybe some close friends… and my fiance is HUGE on privacy- so I would probably have a private blog on top of that.
@Kirst: I hope that’s not the case!
Honestly, I read the blogs that would add diversity to the hive extra super duper close, and give them a little special consideration. Mrs. Penguin actually processes all the applications and then the Bees weigh in. The decision is definitely not mine… in fact I consider myself pretty low on the totem pole. If the Bees say no, I usually listen!
we have a page on what makes a “good” blogger here: http://www.weddingbee.com/blogging-tips-and-guidelines/
Maybe if you did features on different culture’s wedding traditions and let ladies from each of those backgrounds guest post about those traditions you would see more diversity in the women (and men) visiting this site. Also, the guest posts may be the first step in inspireing some women to apply or start a blog.
Just a thought…
I have to admit that I, too, have noticed that the majority of Bees have been Asian or Caucasian. I notice the influx of Asian bees more perhaps b/c I am Asian myself… I would LOVE to see more diversity on Weddingbee! It’s so interesting to see weddings from different cultures!
I am a first generation Dominican-American and have also noticed the lack of under represented African American and latino bees. I do not blame you, Mrs. Bee. A while back I had considered starting a blog so I could apply as a bee, but as usual my life got in the way. I do really enjoy commenting in the boards and reading the blog. I am so glad I found this site.
With regards to luring more diverse bees, why not expand the wikipedia part of wedding bee to include culturally diverse items. Such as ‘Arras’ ‘Rosary Lasso’ ‘Jumping the Broom’, forgive me if these items are listed there. I just think that you will be likely to reach those groups while searching for info (like myself).
Good luck!
Even though there isn’t a lot of diversity in terms of ethnicity/background, there is a lot of diversity in terms of wedding type, budget/personality/personal background, etc. and I think that is what is very important.
I think WeddingBee should seek out bloggers outside the norm- specifically grooms, gay couples, and those on limited budgets.
i think that although there may be a majority of asian-american bees, if you break down their ethnicity/culture (japanese, korean, filipino, chinese, etc) there is diversity there as well. i do hope this post encourages more people to apply.
Considering the Eharmony issue was such a biggie (non-intentional I know, but still an issue of discrimination. Bee’s left on their own accord after all!), I have wondered why the demographic isn’t more spread out amongst many different ethnicities. Granted, I am not in a specified “minority” myself…but still noticed it. However…I think the blog does a wonderful job at diversify-ing the ethnicities it does represent. Additionally, I would think it just as prejudicial to bring a new bee on to fill a racial gap and take the place of someone that might be more deserving, as it would be prejudicial to exclude a deserving would-be bee due to race. Wow that was a run-on. Did that make sense? This is a tough predicament, I don’t envy your position here Mrs. Bee! I do find it quite refreshing though that you are open about this subject, and not dusting the touchy topic under the rug per-say.
@honeymyheart: there is actually a large majority of caucasian brides. i just counted the miss list!
I don’t think someone should be accepted solely based on their ethnicity, but I really would like to see more diversity on Weddingbee. Speaking of diversity, whatever happened to Mr. Mango? His groom’s perspective was so interesting…
@double_helix2005: he had a lot of things going on in his life, and decided to step down temporarily.
I think it would be more interesting to hear from the best bloggers, creative ones basically everything. I certainly wouldn’t read an article even though they don’t have as many creative ideas, just because they are of a certain race. I would read a blog because its interesting. One of the best advantages of the wedding bee is that it has such a diversity of different wonderful ideas. I love that theres extravagant ideas, diys, budgets, real issues. Honestly, I love the weddingbee just as it is, it’s perfect, I wouldn’t change a thing. Keep up all the good work, you’re all my role models not just in diy, ideas, but because of your wonderful personalities, and your willingness to be so open about everything (like miss cheese about “the elephant” or miss snapdragon, or miss duckling). That’s truely what differentiates weddingbee from everything else.
I think you are doing an admirable job. I want to read the best blogs of the submissions you receive, no matter who they come from. While I think it’s nice to give a little special consideration to under-represented groups, I would be very displeased if the post quality decreased in the name of diversity.
I do think it would be great for all the readers to use the information they have to bring more potential bloggers to the hive, from all walks of life. Maybe bloggers from unrepresented groups just don’t know about weddingbee, but some weddingbee users know about them.
I agree with your policy about picking the best bloggers. That said, it wouldn’t hurt to encourage more diverse brides (and grooms) to apply. Just a note, maybe in the FAQs, might be enough to make someone who was thinking about applying, but unsure, enough to push them to take that leap!
I really like the idea of expanding the wiki to include more diverse/culture-specific items that may attract a more diverse readership. As a reader, I don’t care about the ethnicity or background of the Bees (a lot of Polish Bees, btw)– I’m reading for ideas, DIY tips, and “sisterhood” of wedding planning issues. Those seem to be pan-bridal
Having a great writing style is the most important thing to me; that’s what makes me remember a Bee! I love hearing about their planning and creative ideas, and it doesn’t matter what ethnicity they are, if what they have to say is interesting.
It definitely can’t hurt to encourage more diverse groups to apply, but don’t pick them because they ARE different, if their blogs don’t stand up to the test!
About not wanting to start your own blog in order to get on Weddingbee: I look at it as an audition. You only need to write 14 (I think) entries and then send it in as your “audition piece”. If you get accepted as a Bee, then you write for Weddingbee and you don’t need to continue your personal blog if you don’t want to. If you don’t…then you decide. But you don’t need to keep auditioning once the part is cast, as it were.
I would try blogspt; that seems the easiest to me.
I’m not sure if this would directly affect the diversity of the applicant pool but have you thought about revising the blogging guidelines? When I first got engaged last year, there was a heavy emphasis towards DIY posts (as encouraged in the guidelines), which was a big turnoff to me personally since I did not intend to DIY any part of my wedding. What I did find helpful were practical posts that helped me find good vendors in my area and personal posts relating to the more emotional aspects of getting married, such as how to deal with in-law relationships. I had no interest in a three part post on how to design my own $8 invites with ribbons and felt flowers that would take me 4 weeks.
Speaking of diversity, I did notice that three of the bees that got married in SF used the same $10,000/wedding photographer. This was probably a huge coincidence, but instances like this contribute to the feeling that Weddingbee lacks diversity. I understand that it’s very difficult to cross-check all these details across different applicants to ensure diversity but I thought I would bring up my experience as an example of how it might appear that Weddingbee is skewed towards a certain demographic.
With regards to several comments about the ‘cost’ of weddings amongst the Bee; I think, Mrs.Bee correct me if I’m wrong, that location has a lot to do with that. I am in NY and most Bees seem to be in ny and ca where vendors are more costly than say WI (I did consider WI and Central FL for that reason). A wedding in NY for 250 people costs an arm and a leg and I think I’m being frugal in some respects because my budget is the same as my younger sister’s and yet she had 100 fewer people. However I wouldn’t compromise on the photographer. Each bride has their own needs. That’s what this post is about. Figuring out HOW to get more diversity not just racially but also socio-economic.
@emileee: I know that no one paid near $10k for the photog you’re referring to.
and we’ll definitely look at updating the blogging guidelines. we just get busy and forget that certain parts of the site need updating. that said, we do have many non-diy bees!
finally… judging from a previous post on the topic of bee budgets, most readers overestimate the average bee’s budget. most of the bees actually have budgets below or well below the national average. they’re just great at making things look super luxe for less!
Mrs.Bee I think you can only do with what you have. I will strongly suggest against getting certain types of people just to fill a racial gap. Not that weddingbee will do that. Hopefully, after this post more people with great blogs who are diverse will apply to the hive. I like the idea of guest bloggers but I wont go any further like having people vote for bloggers they want to see on the hive. Obviously, the hive is successful for a reason and it that changes it may not be that great. I rather see quality bloggers who will share as much as they can than people who are here because they are filling a racial gap. Goodluck!
This is a topic sort of near and dear to my heart, as diversity (or lack thereof) comes up a lot in an academic publishing field I worked in.
I think one problem that worries people is similar to what Kirst mentioned above — that even if you think you’re making a completely unbiased choice, you have all sorts of subconscious preferences for points of view similar to your own. (That’s a universal “you,” not “you Mrs. Bee!”) Having done this from the selection side, however, I do believe that you’re just picking the best options from a pool with certain demographics. But I think there’s probably some self-replication at work: people find the site more appealing when they see people like themselves writing, and then become more likely to apply to be a Bee when they get engaged. So some thoughtful action aimed at encouraging submissions from all types of potential Bees might start to get the ball rolling a little bit more.
@lmariea: A long while back we made a call for diverse brides:
http://www.weddingbee.com/2007/04/26/new-bloggers-wanted/
And one commenter mentioned that calling out for specific races was “illegal and racist”. (comment 13)
How do you all feel about that? I am no legal beagle, so I have no idea if there is truth to her statement, but I suspect that it’s quite touchy to seek out people of a specific race.
It would be difficult, other than using the word “diverse”, to actually make a call for underrepresented races on Weddingbee.
I think that the chosen bees thus far ave been have been nothing short of awesome. I appreciate that the bees blog on a wide range of topics relating to their weddings/relationships. Furthermore, I personally love that many of the bees are DIY-inclined and even if they’re not, I think their personalities and writing abilities make them a great asset to the site. Please keep up the good work and I think I speak for a lot people when I say that I appreciate the fact that you, mrs. bee are following the comments very closely. It’s clear that you care about this issues and the concerns of your readers.
While I have noticed that there are quite a few Asian and Caucasian brides, it really doesn’t matter. It seems like so many people get their panties in a wad because of race and ethnicity, they forget that we’re here for for wedding planning - not to figure out which race is winning in the hive. The thing is, pictures of the Bees are not even shown unless you move the mouse over their icons, hypothetically, you may never know what race any of the bees are.
As for how the new bee blogs are decided, I think you and the girls really have a handle on it. While you may have more of one race or another, these are the people that are volunteering for the job. I would much rather read a blog that was about something I’m interested in, rather than read something because they are just like me.
I love Wedding Bee and have often thought about what has been mentioned above. I read WB from across the Atlantic and you do it ‘enjoy’ it more when you can relate to the writer. For example it has been great having Miss D’orsay, because she has been bringing British elements into her wedding planning process, which being British I can relate to and as a result I can really relate to her posts.
Question for Bee and Mrs Penguin, your personal blog that you are writing as your ‘audition’, do all the posts have to be ‘wedding related’ or is it just a mixture to see your writing style?
I love Weddingbee as it is — it’s such a warm, unique site and I think that you all do a wonderful job of picking Bees with terrific writing styles, creative ideas, and different and interesting backgrounds. I have noticed that there tend to be more Asian American/Caucasian Bees, but I’ve never thought that Weddingbee was not diverse — everyone has such different perspectives, different stories, and different ideas, even if Asian Americans and Caucasians make up a majority. Of course it’s more interesting and engaging to have a Bee with whom you can relate, but this isn’t limited to race or ethnicity — oftentimes geography/location play a far bigger role in “relatability.”It’s hard because you are working with a relatively limited pool (those who apply to be a Bee) and there is only so much you can do — I think the Wiki idea mentioned above sounds great. I love reading Weddingbee, and thanks for being so considerate and thoughtful when it comes to your readers!
I will admit when I first joined Weddingbee, I noticed there’s a lot more Asians on here. As I spent more and more time here, I realized it’s a lot more diversed than I initially thought.
Honestly, it didn’t really matter much to me though. The people here are so nice and eager to help each other & the blog and board content are interesting and inspiring. That’s what really matters to me.
Honestly? My first thought is “Why does it even matter what race the Bees are?” I mean sure, some of the Bees will bring in their own cultural traditions, like having a chuppah or a tea ceremony, but in most instances the posts are just about planning your wedding, choosing a dress, making invites, deciding where to seat people, speculating on the state of your relationship, buying flowers, etc. I don’t care what a Bee looks like or where he/she is from - it makes no difference for the most part, and when they DO discuss their religious or cultural aspects, that’s just some interesting information. I honestly couldn’t care less about some ethnicities/genders/locations being underrepresented - it just happens, and they’re all people planning a wedding, so it doesn’t matter what they look like.
I realise this may be a bit controversial, since most commenters seem to agree with having more diversity. Just for the record, I’m fine with that too, it’s just that it doesn’t bother me either way. I’d rather have fun and interesting Bees, whoever they are, than specific percentages of different groups.
I think that encouraging diversity is not illegal, there are plenty of employment sites that cater to minorities, and employers can post jobs looking specifically for minorities.
… I tend to agree on the side of looking for diversity - i am half Puerto Rican, half mutt, marrying a half English, half mutt fiance…. we are having a ball planning our wedding. I think it would be nice to see other cultural aspects in planning weddings, and I find it fascinating to read about tea ceremonies, or other things, associated w/ asian culture, and the GLBT wedding that occurred not too long ago (forgive me for forgetting the Bee’s name)
I think a call to diverse brides/grooms/etc is helpful, but no Bee should be chosen because of diversity alone. If they have poor grammar, bad writing style, boring - they should be nixed…. Maybe use social networking sites, such as facebook to get the word out….
I’ve certainly thought about it, but realized early on that the bloggers featured are the ones stepping forward and applying to be hive members. Initially, sure, the hive seemed more Asian, but I believe it’s diversified a great deal since its start! Of course, there’s still room to grow…and one important factor — outside of race, religion or ethinicity — that seems to be important to all readers are the bee’s geographic regions!
Another thought: I do remember thinking “huh?” when I saw that the bee application asks for the bride and groom’s ethnicity. I’m sure it’s on there for a reason, but I imagine those questions are also part of the reason we’re even having this conversation, you know?
@aloweha: I had never blogged before, and I started my wedding blog fully with the intention of applying to Weddingbee, and only told Mr. Cupcake and a friend at first! I eventually told a few more people, but I wrote my blog as if I were already a bee so that I could apply. I used Blogger which was very simple to figure out (I am a designer but I had zero web design experience at the time, and just picked one of the basic Blogger templates).
@Jessanne: I totally agree. Although I LOVE reading about cultural and religious traditions I never knew about, I also just love hearing different points of view, regardless of where a bee lives, what their ethnicity is, or what religion they follow. I think the diversity is very rich beyond just cultural diversity…. sometimes people just focus more on the cultural diversity. Changes in the “face” of the hive come in waves and that’s something I honestly love.
In terms of budget, I think our wedding was under the national average (haven’t sat down and gone through every penny spent), but I admit that it’s something I feel is too personal to share with the world. I think it’s easy to assume how much a wedding cost without seeing the numbers, but unfortunately since money is a very personal thing, that is something some of us bees don’t feel comfortable putting out there for people to dissect. There are plenty of bees I can think of, though, who had/have more limited budgets and did/are doing amazing things with it. I think the diversity in what people spend on weddings has been represented well on Weddingbee — maybe we just need to be more open with how varied our budgets are/were.
I think people who are relatively new to the site should click on the “Mrs. Bloggers” link to take a look at past bloggers. It might increase their sense of diversity to get a better glimpse of bees from the past, since the group changes so regularly.
I read WB because there are so many interesting women on here with creative ideas and different perspectives from my own. Even if half the Bees are whiteys like me, they really all are so different. Like a pp mentioned, I never thought I’d have anything in common with Miss Avocado, but her posts became some of my favorites. I think that kind of diversity — of religion, budget, geographic location, first time/encore brides — can be just as important and rich as racial diversity. I don’t think any reader would get anything out of posts from a new Bee who talked about getting letterpress invites, buying the first Melissa Sweet dress she tried on and picking out floral centerpieces. Even if she were a different race/ethnicity, those posts would be nothing short of ho hum. I’ve noticed that there seems to be a conscious effort lately to select Bees with smaller budgets and I really applaud that.
I’m not worried so much about cultural/racial diversity - I actually think there’s a great spectrum of brides with different situations and stories. As suggested, if you look at the past bees, there’s been a lot of diversity.
For me, I’ve stopped reading as much lately because the nature of the posts seems to have changed. This is in NO WAY a jab at the newer bees, but I haven’t seen the same kind of inspirational posts and ideas that used to be frequent. I’d like to see more about DIY, common issues, ways to help other brides be creative, etc. - things that are relatable for readers. I got hooked on WB in the first place because it was a wonderful source of inspiration and help, and now it seems to be more about specific personal stuff and things I as a reader can’t relate to. I think it’s neat to hear about other brides’ planning, but I’d love for them to be more geared towards the audience and the ‘brides helping brides’ attitude that made me a loyal reader in the first place.
As an African-American bride, I was pretty upset to see that there were very few AA bees. I’ve made my discontent known on a few of the comments but other commenters replied with the names of the 2-3 AA bees from years ago. I was even moved to apply, but I saw WB as a club for primarily Asian bees so I decided that I probably didn’t stand a chance.
I hate that we’re even talking about race!! One of the things that I love about the internet and WB is that you are represented by your words. Not a face. Not a skin color. What you say is what counts here. I’ve noticed posts where people complain that their group isn’t represented, which means that all they’re looking at is that group. Not the ideas or suggestions, or critical insights that the bloggers have poured themselves into. I don’t think that anyone is being left out, I think that certain groups simply don’t apply. If out of 15 applications, only one is a certain group, and that one blog isn’t great, what can Mrs. Bee do??? Make WB more appealing to those groups?? How? This site is already FILLED with TONS of information, and even has a WIKI which ANYONE can edit. So if those on this post thing there’s a need for more information on Jumping the Broom or whatever, then they should take the initiative and improve the Wiki themselves. I think the real issue is that certain groups have dug in and really solidified the info presented in the Wikis (which attracts more readers like them) and certain groups haven’t.
Klevi, saying you view WB as a club for Asian bees isn’t constructive. It’s a club for girls with too much time on their hands for endless DIY projects. I KID! Seriously, though, I feel like if you (again, the general “you” not you, specifically) don’t like something, either try to change it or just don’t read it. If you want to be a bee, apply!
I think you are doing an outstanding job and I really don’t care what the demographics are of the bees. I honestly don’t pay attention to that and it in no way affects how I feel about their posts. I think you should continue to allow the best of the best to blog here, and not worry about what they look like. Keep up the good work.
It saddens me that some bees are not concerned with cultural and racial diversity in the hive. Obviously, on some levels Bee is, or she would not have decided to blog about it. I understand that she and the other bloggers can only choose from brides who decide to apply. I don’t think that recruiting bloggers specifically because they belong to a certain racial or ethnic group would be productive. As she has always said, the beauty in having people apply is that you know they have a desire to blog! I love that policy and I think that is part WeddingBee’s charm.
I agree that WeddingBee is considerably diverse when it comes to a bride’s age, their location, their planning experience, whether they’ve been married before, etc. And those are all valid and desirable forms of diversity. However, not wanting to discuss, focus on, or be concerned with the racial/ethic identity of the bees does not overshadow the fact that many of the bees are either Caucasian or Asian. Thats just a fact of the matter but some of you seem to be very defensive about that. I think that in any given situation, people in the majority group are grossly unaware of how the minority group feels in that same situation. Therefore its easy to say that the ethnicity of the blogger doesn’t really matter, because you likely belong to the same group, or there are others from your group represented. It is plausible that minority bloggers are turned off from WeddingBee because they don’t feel represented. I’m not saying its happening, but I think its a possibility. In a perfect world, the hive would have it all.
I love WeddingBee and I have loved reading the advice, ideas, and stories of the Bees. Bee, you are doing a wonderful job. Thank you for bringing this up, because I think this dialog will ultimately help to make the hive that much better in the future.
I totally agree with Adrienne.
@ Mrs. Penguin - I’m curious too if it is illegal to ask for more diverse bees. Hopefully this post encourages more diverse bees to apply.
Well, if the system is a ‘democratic’ one and current bees decide on future bees wouldn’t that affect the fact that there’s no much diversity?
Current bees are mostly asian so if they choose something they like or alike wouldn’t that result in more asian bees? It makes sense and it doesn’t.
the beehive or the weddingbee community is very diverse the ‘bees’ not so much. you have the spot of color here and there but is not enough.
Maybe the way of choosing bees need to change?…
Yes, I also think it has become more on the ‘high end’ blog. Not enough DIY, anymore. I loved to see the craftiness and creativity of the bees.
I think the last TRUE DIY bee was Mrs.GT. Now is mostly about where to buy, how to buy, where is cheaper or how worth it those $300 shoes are. It’s all lost a little soul. Not what it used to be.
I am African American and I applied but was rejected. Maybe I’ll apply again…..
Mrs. Bee and Bees,
I think you do a great job of picking bees for the hive! I really love the group of past and present bees and am very impressed with the quality and diversity of Weddingbee’s content.
I think that having a diversity guest post feature would be a fabulous way to get more diversity in the hive and possibly inspire more diverse bloggers to apply. I’m planning an interfaith wedding and would love to share with others about that process, and I would LOVE to read guest posts about other cultures and religions as well!
Thank you for always making everyone feel welcome to the hive. Even with a heavily Caucasian and Asian bee population, I have never once felt that other races, cultures, and religions were not welcome on Weddingbee. Even after the eHarmony acquisition, I was at first wary that the openness to diversity might disappear, but I was happy to find that the level of respect and tolerance has remained the same, and it is why I continue to read. Perhaps having a diversity guest post feature might be a great way to incorporate a little more diversity and celebrate the fact that Weddingbee has been so successful in maintaining the very highest level of cultural and religious respect and understanding.
# 2 Wow! This is the first time I have read every comment on a post. I was amazed by all of the responses, confused about a few, and outraged by a small number.
To say, “I hate that this is about race” only confirms that there really is an issue. Sure it would be completely understandable to say that we are ALL brides, and that should be enough. However, comments like these usually come from people who never have to deal with ‘race’ issues.
I am neither upset nor angry over the amount of representation of other groups on this blog. It is an unattainable win in the world of blogging. Other cultures are inadequately represented on most blogs and wedding sites. Most of the time a ’special’ board is created to appease the members of this group. The only way to win this battle is to be active.
Start writing, create your own site, cater to your needs by any means. I would like to think we could all hold hands and sing Kum-Ba-Yah, but the truth of the matter is, race is and always will be an issue.
With that being said, visiting a particular website is a choice. If you feel that you are not getting the information you are seeking, keep searching.
I would like to take the ‘bride’ and ‘race’ descriptions away and celebrate being HUMAN. In the end, this should be what matters the most. We need to work together!
I have to say that as an AA bride I truly appreciate this post. I have been stalking, wait I mean reading, weddingbee for a while and although I am not yet at the point where I can apply, I have been really debating whether I should because of the lack of AA bees. It kinda gave me a sense that I would not be accepted eitherway. I have also read on the boards many AA bees who have applied and been rejected which furthered my thoughts. But the fact that you, Mrs. Bee, took the time to even write this post makes me encouraged.
Granted, I love Weddingbee, the bees who blog, and the wonderful ideas they bring. I also love the sense of sisterhood and feel that the community is colorblind. This is why I come and will continue to come to this site. But I would love to hear about other cultures, races, and even brides in other locations. I really hope other AA brides and Latina brides will consider applying and maybe we will see some change.
Also I LOVE the idea of guest blogging as a way to promote some diversity. I am sure just seeing a face of color or topics about minority rituals and such will be such a great encouragement! I am excited and I truly appreciate the effort Mrs. Bee
Mrs. Bee,
Thank you for bringing this to the forefront. My fellowship research is all about physician parent communication, especially with minority families. I work hard to increase the diversity of the residency and the cultural competency of the hospital… so this subject is near and dear to my heart!
I think there are ways to increase the diversity of the Bee pool, but it may require a bit more proactive role on our part.
It’s really hard as a minority to say, “Oh, I’m going to apply to this role where people may not understand me.” It helps to have a critical mass of people, and a track record of people who have gone before you to make spilling your guts on the internet to nameless, faceless people a more comfortable endeavor.
Thinking about it and discussing it is a good first step, and if you want me to help with some more concrete suggestions, I’m happy too! (I have lots of ideas)
I love weddingbee because of the quality of the blogs and not what race wrote it. Sure, I would love to hear about other cultures/religions if it was available. But, I don’t think a blog should be accepted just because of a certain minority being underrepresented, especially if it was not a quality blog. That is like reverse discrimination to me. A wiki page and guest blogs are good ideas. mrs. bee, you are doing an excellent job. thank you for working so hard.
Mrs. Bee,
I think you guys do a wonderful job of keeping things open here on the hive. I never once thought about race or the need for diversity either just because I just liked reading about what people were picking for colors, how they were setting up the schedules, what vendors people used..etc… I found weddingbee to be a great resource/referral source and perhaps that’s why sometimes certain bees have the same vendors because they read about them or were referred to them from this website. Rather than getting stuck on race or more diversity, I hope that everyone can just look at the pretty pictures and enjoy the ideas that are represented here on this site. I love the forums where I can vent about frustrations that wedding planning brings or even the little “events” (like the valentine’s swap.) It’s hard to please everyone… and I think Weddingbee is doing all that it can with the resources and pool of people it receives. Look how far it’s come already!
@luvtoshop– YES! Let’s celebrate being human (even if sometimes being a bride makes us into bridezillas.. )
I don’t think race should be taken into account when choosing bees. All that matters to me is a bee’s writing style, and wealth of great wedding tips and ideas.
I think you are doing a great job, Bee
Bees
- I am fairly new to the site and I do think it is incredibly helpful and enjoyable but I would be lying if I didn’t admitt that one of the first thing I noticed was the large amount of Asian American/Caucasian bloggers and lack of other ethnicities :
I have really appreciated everyone’s comments Here are some of my reponses:
saying ” I hate that we are talking about race” solves nothing. We SHOULD BE TALKING ABOUT RACE. We should be talking about it all the time. For many women our race or ethnicity make us who we are, give us our sense of culture and identity, and help us to dictate our goals and purpose in life. Talking about it, sharing it with others, learning about how others understand their own enthicity ( especially around topics like traditions, weddings, love, and relationships) can help us understand and appreciate cultures other than our own. This openness and honesty is what breeds diversity. Being different is what makes us all special and Bees and Blogs that talk openly and honestly about how race/religion/culture all play a role in our relationships and interpretation of traditions are ones that would be interesting and worthy of displaying.
Finally- I agree with an earlier post that says diversity breed diversity. The more AA or other underrepresented groups who post, reply to post, and apply to bees, the more who will follow.
This is a wonderful time for many of us and we all have been lucky to find love and happiness, this is what unites all of us. What makes us different makes us special and what unites us makes us a community.
I don’t think anyone is personally attacking Mrs. Bee. We all agree this is a fantastic site (nod your head ‘YES’)!
The notion that a certain culture is not being represented because of the quality or skill level of their blog baffles me. I have visited several blogs; some great, some not-so-great. Not once did I make my decision based on the ethnicity of the author.
THIS IS ALL ABOUT CHOICE. The Internet has an endless supply of ideas, thoughts, sites, pages, blogs, etc. Decide what works for you.
If you are coming here for wedding advice, then take it. If you are coming here for validation, then use the back button and retry your search…you’re looking for something that is just not here (or suppose to be for that matter).
Weddingbee.com is well-known by most brides and bride-to-bees internationally. So, it would be nice to see an assortment of bloggers on the site. May I add, “Don’t judge a book by its cover”, meaning someone may appear to be of a certain race, but could very well not.
May I suggest holding a sort of ‘casting-call”? Let us know what you are looking for and let people audition, so to speak.
I applied to be a Bee as well. While I not accepted, I like to think it was because of my newbie status, and not because of race. I highly think that was the reasoning behind it.
There’s not going to be ONE right answer to this. We all have different emotions and opinions based on our unique experiences. I just hope we don’t let them overshadow the true meaning of this site. And that’s to talk about the world of wedding planning.
i, too, don’t see how race is important to weddingbee. i understand how race and ethnicity are a persons core, and how it is important individually, but how does it relate to this blog? the point of weddingbee is to help you plan your wedding and to get help in answering the tough questions that arise during that process — the race of the bloggers does not inhibit or encourage that. the blogs are interesting/fun to read, helpful in my planning, and idea inspiring, which i believe to be the entire point of this blog. this isn’t a social issues forum, it’s a wedding blog, and for me, it’s doing a great job just as it is.
keep up the good work, mrs. bee!
I agree that I would like to see more diversity in the hive. I would hate for the absence of AA and Hispanic brides right now to permanently discourage brides in those groups from applying to be Bees.
The first criterion of selection should always be blog quality. But I don’t see any harm in being a bit more proactive in recruiting bloggers from underrepresented ethnicities. Mrs. Bee, you could post on message boards for African-American brides saying you’re accepting applications, for example, or you could contact bloggers who you think *should* apply to be Bees. I understand that you’d rather wait for applications from people who are really excited about being Bees, but from the comments, it sounds like some brides in underrepresented groups felt nervous about submitting their blogs because they felt they didn’t fit the right profile of a Bee. A personal invitation from Mrs. Bee herself to apply could change their minds!
I think I understand part of the problem (putting the race part aside for now, and focusing on all of the comments about what we want to see on Weddingbee). We all come to Weddingbee looking for a specific thing, or a few specific things. Often there are posts that relate to our interests, but all of the posts that don’t specifically relate seem to far outnumber those that do, and those are the ones we notice. What we don’t think about is that in that pile of posts that don’t specifically relate, there are any number of topics that other readers are looking for.
So … I just skip over the ones I’m not interested in, and read the ones that I am. Would I like to see more broke, DIY brides? Sure, cause that’s what I am, but it doesn’t mean that I enjoy the rest any less. I would welcome more diversity, but I’m not sure we need to search it out.
PS. I’d like to see some more of the Bees pop in and give their two cents
@JanieLeigh — I think it matters because wedding planning is never one-size-fits-all, and a bride’s racial/cultural background often makes a big difference in terms of the traditions she’s trying to incorporate in her wedding. One of the things I really like about Weddingbee is being exposed to all of the cool, different cultural traditions brides bring into their weddings (Miss Hot Cocoa’s trilingual wedding invitations, Mrs. Avocado’s “time capsule” from her childhood). If there aren’t any bloggers from a certain cultural tradition, than brides who share that cultural tradition are missing out on some ideas that might help them in their planning, and the rest of us are missing out on learning something neat.
Thank you for bringing this up.
I was really feeling bothered by the fact that a LARGE majority were Asian. (not an issue with that ethnic background..)
I was starting to wonder if people became Bees because of personal relationships. That maybe people were choosing their friends to be on the boards. This didn’t seem fair
I am really glad that you addressed the diversity issue…and how you pick the Bees
It may seem paranoid that I felt like there was some type of “conspiracy” going on….but i was really wondering why there was SUCH a large asian-american aspect to this board.
I never wrote and asked because I felt weird about noticing it. So I am really glad that other people wrote in and that you have addressed this issue.
I would like to see MORE bees
More Bees of all backgrounds.
I do see diversity…from a christian wedding, a chinese tea ceremony, to a a muslim couple.
Another reason I think more BEE would be great is that I read this board OFTEN. And I am sure I am not the only one. It may be sick, but I certainly could use twice as many daily posts. haha
I look on here everyday, excited to see what is new.
Let’s have more bees!
Mrs. Bee, Thanks for the interesting post.
I’m near eastern and I’m pretty sure underrepresented on the site but that never bothered me. When I first started reading I noticed that there were a lot of far east asian bees blogging. I didn’t really notice that there were a lot of Anglo-Saxon bees probably because that seems normal to me, living in America. (I say Anglo-Saxon, not caucasian because I’m caucasian but don’t relate culturally to the Anglo-Saxon experience).
What I am really always watching out for is the age of the bees. Being an older bride, I feel I can relate to them more. And, it’s nice to see eco-friendly and animal-friendly bees. That was one of my focal points when planning my wedding so I would learn the most from people who think similarly.
So, I guess what I’m saying is that for me, it’s more about the type of bride you are rather than the race of the bride.
Again, I commend you, Mrs. Bee, for bringing up this controversial issue and handling it so well.
I have to agree, the reason race is an issue is because although I love learning so much about cultural traditions of other cultures it would be nice to see people who share my cultural traditions or have family dynamics like mine (AA). An example would be a post this week about creaseless asian eyes! This I think was a GREAT post and something I am sure many could relate to.
Well as an AA woman, makeup trials and products show differently for us than those not of color so I would love to hear about the antics of a AA bride and her trial.
On a different side I am an AA bride with an Indian fiance. You can imagine the family conflicts (although none of them are hostile in my case thank God) that come from this. We are also working hard to incorporate our different religions in the wedding (I am Christian and he is Muslim) to keep both ourself and our families happy. It would be great to see someone that I can relate to and see how they deal with it.
A lack of diversity just leaves an informational void that I would love explored on Weddingbee (and other wedding related sites).
@LC: The majority of our bloggers are actually Caucasian, not Asian. In fact the ethnic makeup of our bloggers is spot on in reflecting the ethnic makeup of our readers: 59% of our readers are Caucasian, 33% are Asian, 3% are Hispanic, 3% are other, and 2% are African American.
And we actually do have Hispanic bloggers on the site now — I think most people assume that everyone is just Caucasian?
@MelissaB: It’s a big no-no to try to recruit people off other blogs/boards. We wouldn’t allow it on our site, so we wouldn’t do it on other people’s sites either.
I’m glad that we are having this dialogue, because it’s an important one to have.
I’m glad that you decided to post this Mrs. Bee, and am glad that I am not the only one who had been thinking this all along. When I first started wedding planning and came across this site, I thought this site was for Asian American brides. I stuck around a little longer and am glad I did. I never thought though the the lack of AA or Hispanic bees was deliberate. I think it is representative of the blogging community and maybe the wedding industry as a whole. I rarely see AA weddings represented on many of the other wedding blogs either. Sad, but true.
@Mrs. Bee — I hadn’t thought of it that way, but that makes sense — it does seem a bit unethical to go on a message board and try to recruit people to your site instead!
@Tiki: I think the vast majority of the weddings featured on other wedding blogs seem to be Caucasian weddings? Since we have such a large Asian audience, I think it makes sense that we have Asian bloggers?
@LC: There are only a couple bees that were friends in real life before joining weddingbee. The original generation (bugs) were all personal friends of Mrs. Bee; that’s how she launched the site, by asking her friends to participate.
Once she started accepting applications nationally, I can only think of a few relationships that existed before weddingbee:
Mrs Champagne discovered weddingbee through her friend Mrs. Tiramisu, Mrs. Sweet Tea found weddingbee through her friend Mrs. Gingerbread, and those are the only real friendships that I can think of that existed pre-weddingbee. Also worthy of note that all four of those ladies had weddings in very different areas of the country, with different styles and vendors. We were actually unaware that Mrs. Champagne was friends with Mrs. Tiramisu until after she became a bee. Mrs. Tiramisu never wrote to us personally and said, “my friend is applying… please accept her!” We chose her based on her wonderful blog, and whether or not we knew she was friends with Mrs. Tiramisu, it would have not changed our views on her.
Naturally, Bees all have local get togethers and from that sometimes become really good friends. Mr and Mrs Lemon was a guest at my wedding because we became very close friends, but we did not meet each other before we met through Weddingbee get togethers.
I love reading weddingbee everyday but as an African American women who blogs constantly I decided not to apply to be a weddingbee because I was under the impression that brides that were not Caucasian or Asian weren’t welcome.
I agree with the PP that I want the best bloggers here than someone for their ‘diversity.’ After seeing this post, I would reconsider applying.
As I see MrsBee has posted the statistics, I happily find myself in one of those minority spots that everyone seems should be represented more. Rather than say that clearly the site must be racially biased, I have actually ACTED on that and beefed up the Wikis so that they have more culturally relevant information. I was given the title “Hive Hostess” and find myself offering as much helpful info as I can, and visiting my cultural board often to see if I can help those ladies as well. I sent e-mails out to my blog fans inviting them to check out WB. Without direction, without the need to say it, I am acting to diversify WB. And that’s why I say that the race issue is a non-issue. For me, if I want more diversity here, then I go out and bring people into the fold. I don’t think it’s fair to blame MrsBee, when it should be all of us talking to our friends and blog fans to get them to join and contribute. If there is a lack of diversity it is because WE have not acted. Actions speak louder than words, and simply saying you wish there were more people like you doesn’t help. Take the initiative to bring your culture/race/background/whatever supporters and family and friends here. That is how I think WB can diversify.
Oh! I didn’t realize that the site started with a few of Mrs. Bee’s friends…but that of course makes sense. I am not sure why I didn’t ever think of that… Thanks for clearing that up Miss Penguin.
I am glad that people are talking about this issue because it seems to be sparking a lot of dialog.
I am so thankful for all the fellow brides on here and all the issues that are discussed. It really does feel like a community.
My for FI hears about something off weddingbee almost daily
I love weddingbee but it does bother me that there are no black brides blogging. I did find one from a while back and read all of her posts! Its easier for me to compare makeup and wedding hair to someone who is of a familiar ethnic background. I have also noticed that there are a lot of asian brides which I think is odd just because of the population numbers of asians in America is so low. I would expect to see at least mostly hispanics and whites on this bored because they are truly more represntative of the population. Maybe instead of having certain lacking groups apply your team should go out and actively recruit because I’m sure the representation is keeping them away.
Wow. Great post, excellent dialogue as this needs to be discussed. Thank you Mrs. Bee.
I wanted to apply to be a bee, but I didn’t because, I’m a lazy blogger; not because I do not see other AA bloggers like myself.
Yes, I would love to see other AA women posting about whether or not they should wear their hair natural or a weave. Yes I would love to hear about a:
Black/White
Catholic/Protestant
workingclass/uppermiddleclass
family dynamic, wedding planning soap opera like mine
However, I’m too lazy to do it myself, so I will continue to log onto weddingbee and search for info on Philly Brides.
When are you going to get another Philly Bee?
I started reading the weddingbee as soon as I started planning my wedding and I read it almost every day.
As a bride to be–it’s helpful to read about the experiences of other brides and to look at all the beautiful pictures–but I know that I don’t come here for diversity, perhaps the reason I’ve never subscribed. I use go to different websites for different reasons–one is for general advice, one to plan a wedding on a budget, one for diyers, one for offbeat/unique, and then the blogs I’ve found specifically by Black brides–because the range of the blogs makes up the range of who I am.
It would be cool to see more Black brides. I wear my hair natural and my cousin asked me “Are you going to DO something with your hair for your wedding?” Would be nice to have someone else to commiserate with about things like this
Great topic. It’s something that SHOULD be talked about. (And this is my first time commenting).
Lots of great comments here. Thanks to Mrs. Bee for such a thoughtful post! This hasn’t been mentioned a lot yet, but I would be interested to see more geographic diversity. It seems that a lot of Bees are grouped in major metro areas, specifically LA, SF, Chicago and NYC. It would be great to read about more rural, or midwestern, or southern, or mid-atlantic weddings. I think only one Bee has actually planned her wedding in DC (where I’m from). I got excited recently when I saw that a few new Bees lived in the area - only to find out that their weddings are destination or in another locale!
Mrs. Bee-
I dont that that the suggestion to recruit minorities for other sites means going to somewhere like the knot. TThere are great personal/ “private” blogs by minorities where you could email them and suggest applying. I am sure that many would be flattered. This would also eliminate the ethical concern you mentioned.
Also if you are looking for recommendations for those blogs, start a discussion board and I am sure that people would love to share.
i actually think sunsetislove’s suggestion to start a discussion board for recommendations is great.
i think the lack of diversity here is a problem. it’s something that has bothered me on countless wedding blogs.
weddingbee is gaining more “power” and i don’t see why you couldn’t reach out to editors at other blogs/print magazines that reach out to black/hispanic/plus-size/various income brackets/LGBTQ communities and see if they have friends that are willing to apply.
i think simply saying “this is the make-up of our readership and this is who applies” and “we can’t approach other bloggers” is not a strong enough response to the lack of diversity here. i think if you really want greater diversity the weddingbee staff is going to have to do more to achieve it.
I think it shouldn’t be made about ethnicity, gender, sexual preference, etc…
If someone applies to be a blogger…I don’t think any of the above should matter! Let’s let the blogs speak for themselves…if they’re an interesting, talented writer, then the app should be approved.
The boards have been a good way to bring out the diversity. I say continue to do what you’ve done.
Hi Mrs. Bee I was probably one of those women that emailed you because while I LOVE your site and love the helpful information I would also like to see more diversity, more African American, latin, even white brides. I have only had my blog since last August but I have generated many followers and have been contacted by numerous national wedding companies to do reviews on their products. I enjoy blogging and know that it is a lot of work. I blog everyday knowing that one my blog need to look great if I want to apply to be a bee. I would just like to come on here and see beautiful African American brides on their day, get make-up ideas and hair ideas beacause we are different from other races our skin and hair is different so it would be a big help to get inspiration from other brides like myself. Honestly even if the diversity stayed the same on here I would still visit everyday and comment as I do now because I love the site so much. I would just really like to see the diversity change. Thanks for listening and being open minded.
This is silly, I have read this site for almost a year and a half now. It was obvious it was just started taking off then and took awhile to reach certain audiences. It is a process and people who can’t see that its maturing and expect it to be at a point it isn’t at yet need to take a step back and stop complaining.
@QuirkyParsnip, no one is complaining, Mrs. Bee opened his up to discussion and asked for suggestions.
I agree with mydreamring, who’s complaining?! Whether you agree or disagree with the comments that are posted, I hardly think responding to this post is in anyway complaining.
As I mentioned before, if you have never dealt with racial issues, this will seem petty to you.
As far as being silly, I beg to differ. Perhaps a more appropriate statement to make would be, “This is great to see so many people discussing an issue that is relevant in most popular blogging communities.” It’s funny how these ’silly’ comments have yielded nearly 100 entries.
I’m just waiting for the heated battle to begin. I know there is someone lurking on this post who wants to speak their ‘true’ feelings.
Come out, come out, wherever you are!
I really had no intention on getting in on this blog. But all I know is I love reading all the diversity that each bee brings. They each bring something to my ever small world. I love certain traditions that they each have. I love that some have colorful wedding dresses and their whole event is colorful. I love the jumping of the broom, and smashing of the glass. I love it all. So who-ever a bee maybe we each bring something different to the table. Would I like to see more of course. And honestly some of these traditions I would love to include in my wedding even if I am a Caucasian, so much so my skin is almost see through:-) All in all I love wedding_bee and all the bees. Thanks for all the support and ideas that you wonderful lady’s bring to the hive.
Just my silly two sense.
Like most people I would also love to see more diversity on the site. I loved reading about Avocado’s LDS traditions and I can now (sort of) tell people what a hanbok is although I never knew about either before finding Weddingbee.
When I see potential blogs written by underrepresented minorities I do pay them much closer attention. I know everyone has different criteria but the way I choose to weigh in on a blog is that I read the entire first page and if I find myself wanting to comment, go on to the next page to read more, read their “more about me page”, etc then I’m in their corner. There are some blogs which I’ve read every single page of and they go back for WAY more than 15 entries. I feel a bit weird saying this but if it’s a minority blog and I wasn’t exactly captivated in the first few pages I’ll still continue to go through their archives in the hopes that maybe they were just having an off couple of days or something. Why? Because I would love to see more diversity here too! It’s something I’m very conscious of when I see potential blogs and I think it’s a bit unfair to assume we don’t consider all types of diversity when we look at the blogs.
I think if we want more racial diversity we should start bringing it ourselves. If you know of a blog you enjoy reading, why not send them an email encouraging them to apply to Weddingbee? If there is a topic that you’re well versed on I think it would be fantastic if you added it to the wiki. I think people are correct in saying diversity would enrich the hive, but I don’t think we should all leave it up to other people. If we all want more diversity then let’s all work together to encourage minorities to apply.
@DCKate: I almost had a DC wedding, but our budget couldn’t bite it there. If I had read Mrs. Tulips’s posts before I booked our venue I might have though!
I am glad to see that diversity of all types — race, ethnicity, socio-economic status, geography, sexuality — is important to WB readers. Here’s my proposition to all of us, readers and contributors: if you happen upon a great wedding blog that is representing an interesting or underrepresented point of view on WB, you should a) write the blogger and let them know that they would be a great addition to WB and b) write Mrs. Bee or Pengy and let them know about that bride or groom’s blog, so that they can also reach out to him or her. I’ve been doing this for a little while, and although I haven’t yet successfully recruited a new blogger, it’s not for want of trying. Blogging for WB is hard work — you’re committing to posting 2-3 times a week during a period of time when you’re really busy already, and you’ve got to craft your posts for the audience, make them interesting, and ensure that they are well written. And you do this without getting paid. That’s not the most enticing sales package to present to someone! But I do think it’s a really worthwhile endeavor, and I hope that anyone who is thinking of applying will do so.
First off, I want to thank Mrs. Bee for bringing this up for discussion and hope that it doesn’t end with just a “discussion” and no action… but seeing the great history of how weddingbee responds to the suggestions and comments of its readers/members, I have much hope for a more diversified site in the near future
Luv2Shop has already touched upon what I feel (i heart you!) - but I just wanted to add my two cents as well. I am Korean American and feel well-represented on weddingbee, but can totally relate with and understand why others would feel marginalized. I definitely do NOT think it would be (reverse) racist to reach out to such bloggers and readers. If it is a priority to be diverse (which, hopefully it is), weddingbee is large enough of an entity (esp. after the “merger”) to take the time and effort to find great blogs by un/der-represented brides/grooms. Honestly, “reverse racism” is a completely loaded term used to justify those in positions of privilege. Plus, if I might add, diversification is a smart business move.
WB may be lacking strong, beautiful and intelligent Black bloggers because you don’t really have them represented in the first place, so why would they be looking or applying? Klevi18 mentioned that she wanted to apply but didn’t feel she stood a chance because she saw WB as a club primarily for Asian Americans. I think this is totally valid for her to feel and thank her for her honesty. She was reprimanded by some for not applying or taking initiative, with people saying that if you want diversity, you have to make it happen… but I think, if you have never been in that position, you don’t know how it feels and can’t speak on her behalf. Also, it is easy to say that race is a non-issue if you have never been identified or marginalized by others, based on your race. You can be a person of color and not really understand what it feels like to be marginalized - these things are also impacted by your socio-economic status, sexuality, religion, etc. And to say that race is non-existent on the web is just not true. What you write and esp. the picture heavy posts on weddingbee are always indicative of one’s race. I am not saying I don’t enjoy weddingbee - I do! But I think if there is room for improvement, why not? This makes me wonder how everyone here feels about affirmative action. I keep hearing a justification that there just aren’t good applications by “diverse” applicants. Then we should question, why aren’t more “diverse” people applying in the first place? how are their needs not being met? Cuz I know PLENTY of “diverse” wedding bloggers exist! I am glad that the WB is starting to ask these questions and hope it continues to look for and implement constructive answers. whew! that was long
Just wanted to chime in as an ‘older bee’. When I found Weddingbee I noticed that it consisted of mostly Asian contributors, but that didn’t stop me from applying…I just really was very excited about my wedding and the possibility of being able to share it with other people. I know that besides great writing style and good content, that is what I look for in an applicant…the spark of someone excited about sharing their journey.
When the blogs of the applicants are presented to me, I read each one from the very beginning! I have never and will never base my vote on race. I just wanted to make that clear, because a commenter above seemed to insinuate that since the bees are mostly Caucasian and Asian we tend to pick mostly Caucasian and Asian applications.
If you see great wedding blogs, yes please encourage them to apply! Mrs. Penguin and I are only two people and we work insaneridiculouscrazy hours - we could definitely use the help of our readers!
I love to read about the different cultural, religious, and regional traditions and customs that bees share here. As a non-US citizen, I also am still learning new (to me) American wedding traditions all the time. Having more diversity on WB I think would be enriching for everyone, however we can only do that by spreading the wonderfulness that is Wedding Bee to our friends/co-workers/family etc ourselves. So please do encourage people you know to check out WB, I think the more we all share this site with others, the more we will see a greater wealth of diversity, ideas & experience to share with one another.
Just wanted to add my opinion on the matter. I would love to see and read more diversity on Weddingbee. However, I also want to commend Mrs. Bee and the site community as a whole for offering the variety that currently exists. As an Asian American bride myself, I had a very difficult time finding information on Vietnamese weddings and bi-racial weddings and the like when I began my planning process. Had it not been for Weddingbee, I would not have the information and support that I currently have. Although I would love to see more, I would also hate to lose one of the few sites that I can turn to for information, PICTURES! and inspiration for my own personal type of wedding circumstance. And it goes without saying that I hope others that were in my situation and could not find information regarding their type of wedding are able to locate an outlet for information.
And on a side note, for those of you who do not want to start a blog because no one would read it but some of your close friends and family. I encourage you to start them anyways and post the link on Weddingbee. I will visit your site! I love wedding blogs! And I’m sure others here do too!
Sometimes I feel like diversity becomes more about race than thoughts and ideas. We all, bees and wannabees, have been raised differently, with different experiences, different philosophies, and different influences. If the bees provide insightful and thought-provoking posts, then the range of topics and situations that can be covered are limitless. It is important to note that all of our cultures and backgrounds are important to celebrate as we plan our big day, and that includes those of us who are Polish, French, Italian, Russian, Israeli, German…. not merely “Caucasian”.
I understand that you are looking for people who blog often, but some blog more than others. It seems (to me) that there is a lot of emphasis on DIY and not all of us are like that. If someone applying to be a bee does not blog that often now, but has a great writing style and good ideas, I think that should be a big factor in deciding who gets to be a bee. I have seen some bees that don’t necessarily blog that often and some blog about other things other than their own wedding or a DIY project and I am sure that that is done to meet their quota. Just my opinion, but I have also noticed lots of Asian and Caucasian bees.
@Mrs. Bee: Yes, it absolutely seems to be predominately Caucasian. If I am not mistaken, this same topic had been brought up on another blog. This other blog is the creation of a super talented African American woman in the wedding industry. I think she actually touched on the subject once and the lack of AA weddings on her blog. I am not exactly sure what the answer was though, but it does show that it isn’t strictly a Weddingbee issue, but perhaps as wedding industry or the way different races view weddings.
I just want to chime in and say I love this blog, I love the diversity that we already see here.. I have learned so much about weddings just from reading the blogs here… can it be more diverse? yup probably every facet of our lives can be… but remember why we come here! to feel good about our weddings, to get advice, to realize we aren’t alone… I would read this blog if there were no pictures to show me the color of the bees!!! Thank you Mrs. Bee for making this a warm and inviting place!
I understand that you only have so many applicants to choose from, but I would love it if some more cultures were represented. I love seeing wedding traditions from cultures other than my own.
I’m not sure that having the Bees pick your bloggers is a good step. Since they are mostly Asian/White, they are going to pick who they identify with. They have no stake in the blog/company being diverse and appealing to all walks of life. It’s not their company, it’s yours. To increase diversity, you are going to have to be the one to take the step towards diversity. If you were to go down in flames because of lack of diversity (which won’t happen, by the way) they would shrug their shoulders and move on. You would be left holding the pieces of your company. It should be your targeted decision. That is, if it is a part of your business model. If it is not a part of your business model, then keep it as it is. Be sure, another site will pop up that mirrors yours that will gather those who felt left behind by WB. Question is, do you care?
Here’s an idea that might get you more diverse bloggers and readers-
many of us are not “committed bloggers”. I, for one, am one of those. I try to start a blog over and over again and seriously fail after a few good blog spots because it takes so much time.
Maybe you could do “spotlight bees”. These bees could be already married or in the process of planning and may only be committed to blogging for a short amount of time. These bees could be nominated from us or apply with Mrs. Bee, showcase their wedding planning, in say, 5 blogs or so (maybe the best of…. type of thing). You could start by emailing previous bios of the weeks.
You might get more diverse readership, and thus more diverse applicants.
Just an idea.
~Ash
I think the issue of diversity is particularly important because so many of us are marrying people from different racial and ethnic backgrounds these days.
Sometimes it is helpful to be able to read an explanation of a cultural tradition from several different people, rather than just your fiance, ILs and/or officiant. I’m sure there are many people out there wondering what the deal is with smashing the glass, wedding sponsors, tea ceremony or jumping the broom because the ILs aren’t so good at explaining it.
I absolutely support greater diversity for Weddingbee. Very few aspects of life will ever reflect a perfect balance of individuals - whether it be a website, a school, etc. But I think we can all take steps to try and do a better job of it. My concern isn’t the majority of White and Asian American bloggers on WB, but the underrepresentation of other races/lifestyles/etc.
Personally, I read wedding blogs not based on the race of the blogger, but actually based more on their ideas, stories, and geographic location. The majority of brides today want insightful info about local resources such as venues, photographers, florists, etc. Geographic location plays a big role in figuring out your wedding’s details and helping other brides stretch their dollar, too. But in the same vein a big part of a wedding lies in identity. Our identities (cultural, racial, etc.) are reflected in our weddings, and that is where the question of representation comes into play. As a Bee, I haven’t seen a great diversity in WB blogger applicants. Why? I don’t really know. I suppose that’s why we are having this dialogue.
I have always felt comfortable and welcomed on Weddingbee. That may very well be because I, myself, am Asian American and I live in Los Angeles (many readers are from L.A.). I never seriously considered the fact that others would feel they had no identity here. Thank you all for your input and for bringing this to everyone’s attention. Diversity is an issue that needs to be addressed and talked about. I hope that minorities on this site make their presence known (and tell their friends!); and I hope that readers and Bees make them feel welcomed and valued. I am excited to see where we will all go from here! xo, Miss Glitter
I was one of the gals that wrote in to Mrs. Bee earlier this week. Like many of you, I thought about applying, but was unsure about Weddingbee’s target audience, so I figured I would ask first.
In no way, shape, or form do I think that there should be any form of affirmative action on the site. Like many of you have stated, I would much rather read a well-written blog post by a Bee, regardless of race, than a crappy one for the sake of diversity. Nor do I think that there should be a call to diversity. However, I do think that what commenter #18 said would be helpful.
This may sound harsh, but if you’re really annoyed and peeved about the lack of inclusion of xyz peoples, why don’t you take the initiative and start your own blog?
To me, this is partly a chicken-or-the-egg problem: Is there a perceived lack of diversity because of the profiles of existing Bees, or are the existing Bees selected because of a lack of diverse applicants? Either way, I think it’s a moot point.
So where does that leave me? I am a Black, Hispanic immigrant who is engaged to a Russian immigrant. I’ve maintained a personal blog for over two years and have started a wedding blog recently. I think my writing is decent. I KNOW how committed one has to be in order to maintain a successful blog, and yes, sometimes I’ve fallen short.
So, it’s either, um, *take a leak* or get off the pot.
You’re darn right I’ll be applying to be a Bee later on this year!
Let me say first off that I LOVE THE HIVE…and as an AA bride in planning i havent had any problems with taking the ideas or posts here and making them my own..Yes at times it would be nice to see more info about AA brides but I know where and how to take the suggestions and posts here to reflect my CULTURE and my circumstances…… I mean truthfully i have trouble finding info regarding my particular circumstnaces anywhere, AA, Oklahoma and military wedding…..
PS look for my application mrs. BEE…
I will say that I personally have never felt left our or excluded and I would rather have Bee’s that are actually going to write and express themselves than to have a bee just because shes African-American….
I must say I love love love weddingbee. mm i have def thought about culture, race, etc when reading these blogs and i am glad that there are various asian brides to refer to esp ones not marrying an asian groom! there’s something that i feel very connecting to these bees. especially with makeup problems, etc. i guess in that sense, people would love to see others more like them. not sure how i’m helping.. but i think you’ve done a great job thus far finding the right bees!
First off let me say that I love WeddingBee, however I would like to see more diverse bloggers. I’ve been visiting this site 5-6 days a week ever since I got engaged on Dec. 2007 and finally joined last month. I really wanted to become one of the fab Bees but did not apply for several reasons:
1. Would be the only AA Bee
2. Lack of creativity for DIY projects
3. Low wedding budget
4. Location (majority of Bees are on the East or West Coast, while I’m in Austin, TX)
I know that my reasons for not applying are silly and that I should have applied…….I felt that most of the bees knew each other and had wonderful ideas and plans and a higher budget. I thought I would be the creativity lacking, low budget southern AA outcast…..which I know that would NEVER happen and no one would make me feel like an outcast for any reason, but that was what I felt.
My crazy feelings do not stop me from enjoying the site and telling everyone I know about it. (I even tell ppl who are not engaged about weddingbee).
I really wish I would have applied when Mrs. Bee was looking for June 09 brides……..I would have been one hell of a non diy, lower budget southern AA Bee.
i rarely ever comment but i am an avid reader. this suggestion may have already been made but what about having some of the diverse PRO’s come on board. you said it yourself that because one group is represented more that are already blogging it attracts more from that same group. you will get more readers from the group you are lacking by bringing on PRO’s that represent that group…whatever it may be! find someone who fits the weddingbee PRO and i bet you will slowly see more diverse applications coming your way. diversification doesn’t happen overnight but you are well on your way to getting there. good luck!
Mrs. Bee - I think you have done a great job with the selection of bloggers and I think it is great that you recognize the need to continue to diversify. I too initially felt this site skewed heavily towards Asian brides when I first joined, but I think it is a process that takes time and some effort to select new bees who help make this place diverse - which maybe means when deciding between two qualified candidates, taking the one who helps on the diversity angle (but only as a short term fix). I think the Boards help a lot in giving people the support they need on some specific issues, and possibly a way to see what diversity is missing from the bloggers.
I would also agree that diversity is not just about race - its also about religion (I enjoyed learning about Avocado’s religion, maybe more people of other religiions) about those with DIY vs. not, local vs. destination, more same-sex, etc. In the end, having interesting, fun, creative, involved bloggers is the most important thing though!!
Mrs. Bee, I think you are doing an awesome job and your screening process has recruited amazingly talented Bees. I don’t think this blog site should allow anyone and everyone to be a blogger just for the sake of race relations. The Bees don’t get paid to blog, they do it because they enjoy writing to an audience and have good ideas to share.
First and foremost, it’s a Wedding Blog site and should join all brides together that want to share information regardless of race and color. The Bees should be judged by the content of their blog and not by their profile picture. Some of these comments posted that are seeking more diversity ironically also sound extremely racial as well. If you look beyond their profile pictures, not all the Asian brides that have written on Weddingbee share the same tradition, religion or customs.
I visited Weddingbee during my wedding research to get the scoop on the best discounts, cool DIY craft projects, and have been hooked ever since. This has been the most helpful crafting website even long after my wedding day. I hope that WB continues to recruit Bees that enjoy blogging for the public and also likes to share amazing DIY craft projects.
One way to attract more diversity to the blogs (the most obvious ommission is black brides and international brides IMO) would be to promote the blog on sites that cater to that demographic. Wedding Bee pays for advertising, right? Could be worth a shot. Applications come from readers, so recruiting the readers you want will be the key to eventually getting the diversity that you want.
That said, I completely agree with Miss Bee - quality and dedication of the blogger come first. I care a lot more about you writing interesting, though provoking, origional posts than I care about your skin colour, religion, or cultural background.
For the people who apply to be a bee, but are “rejected” (for lack of better term), offer them suggestions or what was good and what was bad about their blog. I applied and was rejected, but its hard to change what you’re doing, if there aren’t any suggestions. Maybe you do this already and my blog was so bad, there was no help for it, but I would assume that if people are given tips to improve, it will increase their likelihood of reapplying!
@cbgg: : we actually have never paid to advertise anywhere. Do you have any sites in mind that target black or international brides?
@hbowar: We receive so many applications, that we unfortunately don’t have the time to work individually with each person that applies.
When we read blogs, we’re just looking for that spark that hits us right away, where we think — this person would be great for Weddingbee! If you want any specific feedback on your app, feel free to shoot me an email!
I am African-American. I have followed Bee for the past couple of months and really did not notice the diversity or lack thereof. I actually paid more attention to the articles and various DIY ideas. I love Weddingbee! I think some individuals are missing the fact that there is an African-American board on the website. That is an attempt to diversify Weddingbee. However, as with most companies in the US, Weddingbee could do better at attracting African-American talent. There are numerous African-American bloggers. I frequently visit one future bride’s “wedding” blog weekly. She is an awsome blogger and I think she would add something to Weddingbee. Mrs. Bee, maybe you can reach out to her and get her feedback on further diversification of the bees. Her blog is THE FUTURE MRS. JONES. She is located in the San Francisco Bay Area. I don’t think there is a bee based in the Bay Area. Also, I would not focus so much on African-Americans, what about our Latina brides, Middle Eastern brides, traditional African brides (e.g. Ethiopian, Nigerian, Samolian), or Native American brides. There are ways to attract these talents and it starts with reaching out to them by posting ads regarding Weddingbee on websites they frequent or magazines they may read or even by word-of-mouth (which is probably best and only done where there are others like them blogging). I enjoy Weddingbee because I am so into weddings that I will read any and everything about weddings regardless of the bloggers race. However, a lot of people only relate if they have someone that “looks” like them or provides ideas specific to their own culture. Sorry for the length. I had a lot to get out. I think Mrs. Bee and the other bees are doing a wonderful job. I look forward to the receiving the feeds in my inbox every morning. Keep up the good work and if you need any more ideas or suggestions, please feel free to e-mail me directly, Mrs. Bee. Thank you for this blog.
@Mrs. Bee: Wow! I am pretty impressed that you don’t advertise at all. Go Bee!
I don’t actually have any sites in mind (since Weddingbee pretty much does it all for me and I’m not a minority or international).
Since I am an HR person I am approaching this from a recruiting angle. These are my suggestions:
-If you decide to advertise, focus on some sites that cater to the diversity you desire.
-I am guessing that you get a lot of new traffic from Google? Maybe you could do something (like the great suggestions to focus on beefing up the ethnic traditions in the wiki…not that I have any clue what’s included already) to drive up your google rating for the desired demographics. That said I don’t know the first thing about search engine ratings.
-Personal referals from other bees are a good thing IMO. (Although some commenters have argued otherwise, I disagree.) I can tell you that our best new recruits in the office are almost all from employee referals. For goodness sakes, we PAY employees if they refer us someone great! Anecdotally, Lemon and Pengy are two of my all time fav bees and I believe they were friends before WB, right? As a reader, I don’t care HOW you find them (and if it’s “fair”…as if that exists), I care THAT you find them. Do what works.
-I would kick things off by actively recruiting one or two awesome bloggers that fit your desired diversity demographics. I wouldn’t make that practice part of business as usual, but as commenters have said over and over diversity breeds diversity. Just to get the ball rolling.
If it were up to me I’d roll all these ideas out in a multi-faceted campaign to increase diversity.
I think that you are totally on the right track with deciding to actively address this issue. With Weddingbee’s phenomenal success it has basically become the gold standard in the online wedding world (don’t tell me theknot.com is - OLD news!) and your customer base is paying attention and asking you to attend to the finest details. It really speaks to how incredibly successful you’ve become.
By the way - I’m so tickled that you responded to me directly! I’m a little star struck!
One of my favorite features on WeddingBee are the WeddingBios. What can I say? I’m impatient, so I love being able to jump right to the wedding day!
When it comes to the Bees, I realize that the selection is limited to the pool of applicants. Plus, blogging is 100% time-intensive, so it’s not for everybody. The WeddingBios seem to be a different kind of animal, so to speak. Maybe a little effort could be invested to find diverse WeddingBios to feature. How are the WeddingBios selected anyway? Are they reader-nominated? If they are…maybe us readers need to get out there and start nominating more diverse types of weddings.
WeddingBee is very much made up of user-created content. So, if we’re not seeing the type of content we would like to see, then I feel that it’s our responsibility to create it. I think it would be a disservice to the hive if Bees were selected based on demographic information as opposed to creativity, style, and blogging abilities.
I agree with almostmrsanderson. I’ve stopped reading as much because I don’t find the posts to be as idea-filled/inspirational as they used to be. That being said, I’ve been engaged for awhile…maybe I’ve just seen most of what is around:)
@Mrs. Bee: This is the site that I go to for information on African-American Weddings.
http://www.vibride.com/phpwsbb~PHPWSBB_MAN_OP~list.html
In particular I search that sites forums for playlist ideas, hair options and pictures of other black female weddings.
Remember its all about the pictures!!! Think of how many times you grab a bridal magazine and there are always blonde brides on the cover. I get so excited if I see an advertisement with a Bride that looks like me. Even more excited if it is an interaccial couple I’m still waiting to see a mainstream bridal magazine with a bride of color (asian, black, latina) on the cover.
All that said, I think that is mainly the point. Not that I can speak for all the African-American brides on here, I know I would be jumping for joy to see a Bride that looked like me on the main page one day when I log-in.
I love WB, and have come here daily for about 6 months! The first time I stumbled upon it was through a google search I did about wedding budget tools and it brought up the “real budgets” section. How illuminating and informative! I was totally hooked! It was like doing a business case study! Although I can respect Mrs. Cupcake’s comments that some people simply aren’t comfortable talking about something as personal as their budget, I find that a difficult feeling to comprehend. As a Bee, you’re letting the world in on some of the most personal, emotional and intimate experiences of your wedding. You share some very private details with the hive. I can’t understand why sharing your budget would be more personal or private than any of those moments. I find it extremely helpful to know people’s budgets, especially if it could be located in a bee’s little profile box, because it’s a big piece of the planning puzzle. And if I can just be frank for a moment, it’s part of keeping it real in my opinion. WB has an amazingly supportive, non-judgemental tone all around that I find it hard to believe would be changed by sharing bee budgets.
I would also like to see more gay and lesbian couples included in weddingbee, but there is no question that you would have to expressly seek out brave gay and lesbian bloggers willing to brave the heterosexually-centered hive:-) We’re a pretty straight bunch!
Mrs. Bee, the bride-to-be blogger I mentioned earlier is not THE FUTURE MRS. JONES. It is actually called BECOMING MRS. JONES. The link is below. http://becomingmrsjones.com/?page_id=4
@AlwaysChasingJustice: ah she is actually a blogger on bloggerbrides, and we don’t accept brides that are already blogging on another wedding site.
I also wanted to mention that this discussion about diversity has largely become about African American brides, when there are so many aspects of diversity. I like to think of diversity in many different ways, and hope to increase Weddingbee’s diversity in all those ways… and not just race!
Mrs. Bee, I totally agree that it has become about African-American brides where it should be about complete diversity. This often happens whenever diversity is mentioned. I argued this same issue in one of my law school classes. We were discussing a racism tort cause of action and everyone continued to focus on African-Americans. I could not believe that so many highly educated individuals could be so narrow minded. They were so against it because they some how could not relate to racism/discrimination. I was speechless at times due to my surprise of their lack of education (i.e. Prop. 8 in CA blantant discrimination against gay/lesbian couples). My law school is pretty diverse, so I was surprised that everyone continued to focus on African-Americans. I think this often happens in America given that diversity started largely due to the injustices of African-Americans. Diversity comes not only in different colors, but also in different religions, sexual orientation and physical abilities (Americans with Disabilities). Again, I love Weddingbee and was just offering suggestions that may help bring more African-American brides to the site (being that I am an African-American woman). Good luck with diversification. I think you all are doing a wonderful job and I look forward to reading blogs from a diverse group of brides. I would be very interested to read the planning involved with a Native American wedding (the DIY projects would be awesome). Thank you.
I think this is so difficult, but good for you, Bee, for being willing to talk about it and accept some slight criticism.
I say it’s difficult because although I’m white (a “well-represented” group), I’ve thought to myself several times “gee, they have D.C.-area bees but they are all getting married somewhere else! D.C. is big, we need more local bees!” But the truth is when I get married in a few months, I will probably read Weddingbee less and less, and maybe there will be an influx of D.C. brides and my timing was just wrong.
I bring up that story because there are lots of different types of diversity and if you look at Weddingbee every 3 months it’s going to be very different each time, in terms of who is blogging, what’s on the board, etc.
I think it’s important that you are actively seeking out how readers feel. It seems there is a demand for African American brides. I don’t have any specific solutions for how to increase the diversity, but I hope is that different girls will come across these posts and more types of women will be encouraged to apply (now that they know how badly they are needed/wanted!). And that goes for Hispanic brides, Jewish brides, Indian brides, all kinds of brides!
I was first attracted to this site because I am a DIY bride and when I first joined, almost every bee was a DIY bride. Because I am also a gocco bride, I am especially interested in Mrs. Lemon and Mrs. Penguin’s posts (just to name a few gocco bee). With that said, you may be attracted to this site for many reason, depending on how you define yourself as a bride. If you are an Asian bride who include many Asian traditions into your wedding, you’d probably like to see more bees who do the same as you. Granted, many of the new bees are not DIY, which makes this site that much less appealing to me and I find myself reading it less and less, but it’s not because the site does not welcome DIY brides, it just mean that the current applicants are much less DIY’ers. I think it really depends on the timing of your wedding concurrent with those brides who are also having weddings and willing to blog. Mrs. Bee can only do with what limited supply she has of blogging brides. As a minority, I always hate seeing reverse discrimination where a minority group is given special privileges in the name of diversity (specifically race).
I really love the idea of topical “guest posts” that someone brought. While it wouldn’t increase the diversity of the Bees, it would increase the diversity of topics covered by the site as a whole. Call out 1 week for posts on say…the challenges of being an atheist bride. Have people submit posts, go through them and post a selection of the best the following week. You could essentially do a new topic each week. I’m sure this would create a lot more work for Mrs. Bee and Mrs. Penguin though.
I know personally I didn’t have the time nor the inclination to be a full-time Bee, but I would absolutely contribute to topics near and dear to my heart, particularly underrepresented issues. It could perhaps be a good way to start to branch out into certain demographics since you don’t have to find a good all-around blogger, just a great 1 time contributor.
“I also wanted to mention that this discussion about diversity has largely become about African American brides, when there are so many aspects of diversity. I like to think of diversity in many different ways, and hope to increase Weddingbee’s diversity in all those ways… and not just race! ”
That statement says it all.
to all the bees, and mrs. bee especially…
i think all of you ladies are doing a fantastic job as is. i can see why arguments regarding diversity on WB may originate from, but never in my mind did i think that WB was underrepresented in diversity. to equate diversity solely with race is not constructive… in this particular situation.
when WB did start out, there was a large number of asian brides, but there has been much progress to include other races into the mix… and it has been done fabulously. keep up the good work!
i think African-American brides should be help up to the same standards as all the other brides… to just include an AA bride to represent a certain demographic would be unfair to all AA brides and readers out there.
I am sure there are many AA brides out there who represent the standards WB is looking for… and upon discovery of such talents, i will be looking forward to reading their entries as well.
If i could make a comment though… I would love to see the addition of LGBT brides. that’s sorely lacking on WB.
This is a very interesting topic as a African American Bride, I believe here on wedding bee we are here and we do post and are active on the posts. I think because it’s not asked that it doesn’t mean we are not here on the boards.
I also think that a lot of African American Brides have blogs and wedding profile pages. I not sure where the “demographics” are going when they keeps getting mentioned in numerous posts. Just because we aren’t recognized on the boards for our race doesn’t mean we aren’t apart of the participating groups.
I personally enjoy wedding bee and think it’s a great site and I would love to see more diversity just to get other ideas and see other cultures. I don’t think you should change your process of how you recruit brides to be or brides in general but you should just be aware.
I read *all* the blogs via the e-mail subscription option. The way it’s set up, it doesn’t identify which Bee has written each post. It’s an interesting perspective to read it that way, seeing all the posts in full, without knowing who wrote it, unless I click on the link back to the site (or unless they post self-pictures). Unless they post pictures, or write about a certain cultural ritual, I wouldn’t know what race/ethnicity they are. These things have no bearing on my enjoyment of their wedding-planning.
Another huge aspect of Weddingbee is the Boards, which is mostly user-driven, and has a much wider range of diversity. Let’s not forget about what our fellow Bee fans can teach each other in that forum!
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Mrs. Bee, New York
Age and Occupation: 29, Weddingbee Publisher
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 33, Internet
Engagement Date: May 7, 2004
Wedding Date: March 5, 2005
Venue: Westside Loft, New York
About Me: Yes, my name really is Bee! I love my blogging, wikis, and tabasco sauce!
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