Wedding Blog
I’m grumpy, and I blame it all on invitations. Well, that and ginormous vet bills for emergency ICU admissions of poisoned dogs, but since I’m more relieved to have alive dogs, I’m blaming this on the invites.
Way back when, I declared that I didn’t care to spend any money on invitations. I love, love, love paper (it’s the nerdy teacher’s pet in me who always loved stacking up her new notebooks and writing utensils at the beginning of the school year) and have drooled over invitations online just like any other bride, but in the big scheme of things they didn’t matter enough to me to warrant more than the minimum outlay. I’d rather buy furniture.
So, on one of my many wallet-sucking trips to Wal-Mart, I grabbed a couple of packages of cheapo invitations (on clearance, no less). My intention was to show everyone that it didn’t matter if you spent $26 or $260, you could still have good-enough invites while saving a bundle. In fact, I joked that I could hand-write every invite on a different type and color of paper because nobody would ever know; only the “insiders” ever see the invites all together in happy stacks. But now I’m stuck.
Like Sara, I struggle with DIY. First, I’m fired up. “I can do that!” I think. “Piece of cake!” Then I get started and freeze up. “Oh, this is harder than I thought.” I walk away. Eventually, I pick it up again intending to research and make decisions, and before I know it I’m exhausted, grumpy, and overwhelmed. “This is going to suck,” I think, “and there’s no way I have the skills to get it done.” I pick whatever is closest, decide I really don’t care anyway, and then obsess about whether I should have done this differently or chosen that instead.
True to form, I have fifteen versions of invite wording and keep messing with font sizes. I think constantly about swoopy versus upright fonts (yea, yea, I’m going all technical on you with the terminology, ha). I ask the mister for input, then decide I like the other one better. I feel hopeless and sad that I’ll ever come up with something not-sucky. Next thing I know, I’m back on the Paper Source website with a cart full of colors that have nothing to do with our wedding palette, all because I don’t want people to get our invite and think we’re cheap. This from a woman who declares her unwillingness to “pay retail” regularly. To everyone.
The challenge is finding a balance between not wanting to spend a penny more than necessary with meeting my own expectations. When the going gets tough, I tend to settle for whatever’s easiest and then regret it. Looks like this has become invitation-deciding-as-life-lesson, hasn’t it?
I’m going to have to accept my inner perfectionist, find a way to make her play nice with my inner cheapskate, and either make the decision myself or trust the input of those whom I ask for guidance. And then reward myself with a glass of wine.
Does anyone else feel hopeless or overwhelmed halfway through every project you take on? How do you get past it?
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Share this post: Invitations and Life Lessons
I totally feel you! I decided to gocco our invites and I am now on my third trial. First, the words were smudged, then I didnt let them dry all the way before stacking them…thus smudging those perfectly formed words as well! Now on my third try, they are coming out as planned with only a few small errors. My fiance started to point out the errors and I blew up! I said, “this is it, i AM NOT DOING THESE AGAIN! My back is hurting, my knees are hurting, and our wallet is beginning to yelp at the price of screens and bulbs!” They are going out on Monday and I think they are beautiful…in that homemade sort of a way! I figure, everyone knows what its supposed to say, they will understand it. I wash my hands of invitations monday morning as soon as the post office opens! I began to realize that the people receiving the invites love us and care not about the perfection of a few pieces of paper. Next time you get frustrated, just think about that. They will love whatever you send them!
I felt REALLY overwhelmed by our invites too. We decided to be wild and letterpress them ourselves, I know, WTF right? But I had taken some letterpress classes in college and so I thought, why not. It was really daunting regardless and I thought that they were crap about a million times. But in the end, after just deciding they had to be done and working with it they were beautiful. And I love them. And now we are letterpressing for everyone. Crazy times. So good luck with your own invites…you can do it!
Yes! I stalled on my invitations 3 times… I thought I was “saving money” — but after all the supplies, I could have just ordered them, and I’d probably like them better!
letterpress printing plate = $72
Crane envelopes = $48
Crane lettra paper = $62
letterpress fees = $180
custom stamp from etsy = $24
custom embosser = $120
belly band paper = $20
bakers twine to tie them = $18
(doesn’t include the printing plate I screwed up or the extra envelopes I had to buy)
Um, so my budget invitations cost me over $500 — I could have ORDERED custom invitations for this price… ugh. And I’d probably actually like them. Sigh.
I stick to my first gut feeling!
Looking at people’s wedding photos and blogs, and even doing your shopping online, it’s really easy to get bogged down in all the options you suddenly realize that you have. But when you first started thinking about invitations, I’ll bet you had an impression of the type of invite you’d like to send out. So stick with that impression, even if you find something that’s really pretty or funky or clever.
That gut feeling is there for a reason! And it’s an easy way to narrow down the billion options you’ve seen. (The internet is extremely dangerous, I know.) Plus you’ll be building the wedding YOU want, not the wedding you think people are expecting.
I’m having similar problems with our STD postcards. He’s a astrophysics and I’m a biologist, so I want to put on the front “What is between biology and physics?” And on the back have “Chemisty!” and then have all the info. Not sure if I should have pictures of us on the front or what. Fortunately, playing around in illustrator is not costing all that much money, but is costing time.
Cheese, you should post some of your font/wording versions on Weddingbee for input! I always find that MUCH more helpful than asking Mr. K, who would send out a sheet of copy paper with Times New Roman font if he had his way! Also, if you are tiring of DIY, there is a great line of “Brides” (as in the magazine) invites as Michael’s! They are really cute and affordable!
I’m one of those girls that doesn’t really care what the invite is, but I still struggled with wording and fonts and all that stuff. But what it came down to, was what WE thought looked the best. I know that two-thirds of our guests are just going to toss them. So I bought a 150 invite kit for $40. They are simple but cute and all of the people who noticed them, liked the simplicity of them. But everyone has commented on the wording and how it suited us. We are both very silly people and our invite wording is a little silly.
I like Miss Kitten’s suggestion, narrow it down and get some input.
I totally want to hug you.
I also purchased clearance invites at Wal-Mart. Dont get me wrong I love them love them love them BUT the way that I picture them in my head. I have alot of work to do to make them the way that I want them to look. I start to work on them and then I push it aside to work on something else.
DIY invites are nerve racking only beucase you want the gues to open them and take in a breathe and say Wow!
I guess the best way to get passed it is ….JUST DO IT!!
I think I should listen to my own advice…lol
I hear you! This site has inspired me to do more DIY projects, but I haven’t started any yet! I also bought clearance invites at Wal-Mart (I got 120 invitations for $21!!) and I plan on printing them just with black ink and then making a band around the middle in my fuschia (my color) with nice paper or ribbon. That will just add a little color and touch and still be really cheap. I also bought some cool stickers with wedding sayings at Michael’s and am going to put one sticker on each band. This whole thing will cost me less than $100.
Honestly, I have never saved a wedding invitation - I put the date in my calendar and throw it in the recycling bin. So don’t stress about this! Just remember what’s important -your fabulous fiance!
totally going thru this right now… i am so. sick. of working on photoshop (all the layers driving me crazy).
and i’m 2 weeks behind schedule on completing my DIY invites. thankfully i budgeted extra time. gaah!
all the best, go easy and don’t give up!!
I am SO WITH YOU on this…I bought an invitation set from Wilton.com and was happy with it…until I decided I would use tulips for the wedding. There are calla lilies on the invites. Will anyone notice or care? Only me. And now I’m OBSESSED with finding a reasonable alternative that won’t break the bank! Further, I need to figure out what I will do with my calla lilly invites! YIKES! Can’t wait for my Gocco to get here, that will calm me down!!
Don’t know if anyone knows about this website: http://www.123print.com We ordered 250 STD postcards for less than $60. We are seriously considering skipping the DIY route for our invitations and ordering them from there too.
Adapting during a DIY project is essential for me, because I’m still kinda new at the whole creative/crafty thing! So, I usually do mock-ups with scrap paper, and try to model my projects after the sample.
I’m also honest with myself. I know I want invitations of a certain caliber, and that I won’t be able to craft them and be totally happy…so, I’ll be looking to work with a vendor (maybe on Etsy?) to get my dream invitations!
Sweetie Cheese, after all that stressful decision making is over with, make it a BOTTLE of wine!
The struggle between the perfectionist and penny pinching sides is always tough. Unfortunately for my bank account the perfectionist usually wins out. But I’m sure whatever you decide will be lovely. And I agree with MissAubergine above, definately make it a bottle (of cheap?) wine.
““This is going to suck,” I think, “and there’s no way I have the skills to get it done.” I pick whatever is closest, decide I really don’t care anyway, and then obsess about whether I should have done this differently or chosen that instead” - Are you in my head? hahaha! That’s exactly what I think, I lose confidence in my abilities to create something that’s good enough.
I keep reminding myself that people would really appreciate a hand made invitation, even if it’s not “perfect”. That thought motivates me to continue and not opt to order pre fabricated invites.
Does asking if we can elope every third day count as “dealing?” I’m with you on the wine…essential for any wedding task!
Cheese, I have doubted my self all the way through every single project I’ve taken on. Then I drink a lot and beg to elope and cry to my mom. Then I suck it up and get back to work!
I love Weddingbee but in some ways, posts like these are a product of the Weddingbee mindset. We see all the amazing DIY or fancy letterpress Bee invites and make ourselves nuts/green with envy. Cheese, the real world is not Weddinbee. Your semi-homemade invites will be lovely, you’ll have saved a bundle of money and you’ll be MARRIED. It’s all to the good.
You can do it, Miss Cheese! Unleash your inner craft goddess! 
If I were closer, we could have craft night.
Ms. Cheese, I totally hear you! I’ve been working (read: obsessing) about my invites since September (wedding is in July), and although I FINALLY put together my first real one I’m still not quite happy. Something’s just not quite right yet. And sometimes I wonder if it’s because I know I made it myself and I think people expect something fancy made by an expert.
However, this weekend while I was shopping for Russian netting (btw where the hell is all this netting hiding? I can’t find it anywhere!) I met a VERY nice lady who started inquiring about what we were buying and what for. I explained to her that myself and my lovely bridesmaid were picking up supplies for my DIY wedding and she was thrilled. Like crazy-oh-my-god-can-i-come-to-your-wedding-even-though-we’ve-never-met thrilled. She thought it was the coolest thing ever that we were actually making things ourselves and not just buying everything.
So don’t get stuck in the DIY rut! Pick up your scissors, ruler and pencil and get back at ‘er! Your invites will be amazing (even if they’re not totally ‘perfect’) because they were made with love and no one will ever have the same ones.
How many invites would you need to make? and do you NEED paper invites. Would you be happy doing an email, website only, postcard or magnet? All of those options are either inexpensive, or free. I opted to do magnets and a wedding website, skipped the paper and the whole shebang cost me about $60. If you definitely WANT the paper invites try http://www.weddingpaperdivas.com
They have great designs, and you customize the wording and font, they print and ship it to you and voila! I think they range about $2.00 per invite, which will probably be less than what you’re spending on various supplies to do it yourself.
I wouldn’t stress too much about invitations. Your guests are happy to even receive an invite, I dont think they really care that much about what they look like. They usually forget what they looked like before the wedding day has even arrived. We’re the only ones that care (brides), and I’m pretty sure it’s to secretly drive ourselves mad.
The outside of all of my invites were different.
I made them all out of a stack of scrapbook paper.
No one knew except a few people.
Also, I just made my first faux wedding cake!
Check it out: myspace.com/knotcake
A great way to get custom invites for cheap is to use Etsy. I found a seller with a design that I liked, had him tailor it to fit our needs, and then printed everything on my own printer. We got the digital files for the invitation card (front and back design) and 2 enclosure cards for $80. I then printed everything on Paper Source stock.
All together the cost came to about $180 for 65 invites; each invite has an envelope, ribbon belly band, two 5×7 cards, and two 4×6 cards.
Bonus: we’ve been able to disassemble the digital files to pull out elements to use on other printed materials (guest book, program etc). So in addition to the invites, my $80 bought our wedding “brand”.
When my friend Becky was pregnant with her daughter I wanted to make her a puffy “M” for her daughters name, cover it in pretty pink fabric and wooden lady bugs to make her room. I couldn’t find a letter in the right size so I bought syro-foam and attempted to glue gun the batting and fabric to it… all I succeeded in was burning my fingers with the hot glue, breaking the syrofoam letter I made and giving up :-/ Now I need to get a pricer letter from Paper Source just so I can complete the project… so I feel your pain.
@AliCherri1: Thanks. We love him. Even when we want to kill him.
I will be doing my DIY invites as well. I found a pretty cool website the other night and ordered paper samples off of them. They have all different kinds of cardstock, vellum, etc. Their samples are only .50 each. I should get them tomorrow…I’m excited.
The website is http://www.papersandmore.com
They also will do custom cutting as well.
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Mrs. Cheese, Knoxville
Age and Occupation: 29, Engineering Manager
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 27, CAD Designer
Engagement Date: July 31, 2008
Wedding Date: May, 2009
Blogging Since: October 16, 2008
Venue: Our home and the two acres it sits on
About Me: I’m an emotional girl who loves sentimental things, parenthetical asides, and trying to do things herself. I can cook, sew, am a whiz at planning, terrible at delegating, and totally in love with my fiancé (who will be my second husband but first love of the rest of my life). For our home/ garden/ DIY wedding, we’ll be moonlighting as interior designers, home improvers, and gardeners with the help of our fabulous friends and neighbors. We can’t wait to be married, and are learning how fun getting married can be.
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