Weddingbee Blog

I’m not sure it really comes across in my posts, but I have a ridiculous sense of humor (actually, I know it doesn’t. All my posts here read as earnest, dweeby, or weird for some reason). And no one knows this (the humor part) more than my sister.

Her non-crafting fingers pulled together a cheeky, casual, and cheestastic Evite invitation for my bridal shower–just the way I like it! A little off-beat, and silly. She used the photo “collage” I made a couple months ago (to unceremoniously introduce the BMs to each other) and put it into an invitation that was perfectly and purposefully craptastik! Along with the conveniences of doing the invitation online was the need to quickly salvage some botched planning.

So here’s the back-story.

Originally, another one of my BMs, “A”, was full steam ahead with the planning. She had ideas about a lingerie party brunch-thing with plenty of doughnuts and breakfast items. Though not my favorite things (I don’t eat breakfast or doughnuts and have plenty of lingerie), I was happy with all of it, and just felt honored for all the planning and celebrating on my behalf! I didn’t have the heart to tell my friend any different.

She offered up several places, including her home, and a couple area restaurants. She did this all on her own without any help. (My sister and cousin, the other two BMs, live out of state.)

She narrowed it down the Tabard Inn, a local place famous for their brunches, when at the last minute, a friend of mine, who happens to be the owner of one of my favorite restaurants, Sonoma, offered his venue—basically for free.

“A” was so exasperated at this point—having apparently done so much legwork in finding a place—that she basically scoffed at the idea of Sonoma, and declared her exhaustion and increasing stress level over the planning of the shower. She also complained that too many people were invited, and it was turning into a mini-wedding! Wow! Really?

That threw me for a loop. I felt at once embarrassed… and miffed. A last minute change of plans got her upset? She hadn’t even put down the deposit! But I was also a little unhappy with my sister for being so hands off and leaving “A” to do all the organizing herself. I couldn’t help but think that part of “A’s” exasperation was caused by the slacking BMs. Their side of the story, by the way, was that “A” steam rolled the whole thing, and they didn’t feel compelled to step on her toes. Such silly drama!!! Given my age, and the age of my BMs, I never thought this could happen. We’re in our thirties! Aren’t we supposed to be more cooperative than this?

Whatever. There was plenty of finger pointing to go around. I quickly decided that I would rather not have a bridal shower. I didn’t register for anything, anyway!!!

Long story short, I told “A” that I’d rather NOT have a shower, given all the stress and lack of cooperation (and that I didn’t appreciate the mini-wedding comment). And more importantly, I hate the idea of burdening anyone. In the meantime, my mother was in the background, looking to be part of the planning process. Oy!!

So “A” apologized, but obliged my request. However, after my sister got the call from “A”, along with my text to tell her to cancel her flight, she knew something was awry. So to try to remedy the situation (I think my mom called her), she insisted that we go ahead and have one, but make it simple, unfussy, and unique to my off-beat taste (no lingerie, brunches or doughnuts).

She whipped up the ridonkulous Evite above, reduced the guest list to about a handful of my closest friends, and contacted “A” to plan a foodie-themed (I love cooking and dining and food culture!) bridal shower LUNCH at my mother’s house! I think things were strained between the three of us for a little while there, but I hope this will come together and we’ll forget about all the stupid whatever-it-was.

With regard to the new take on the shower, I couldn’t be happier!!! (Unfortunately, my cousin canceled her plane tix from California, and won’t be able to make it after all the uncoordinated coordination–don’t blame her.) But the bonus is that my mother is extremely excited and proud that she too gets to participate. She’s even got the handyman over tonight fixing things up. So cute.

After this little bit of drama in an otherwise stress-free wedding planning process, I’m really looking forward to this casual, meaningful, and funny little shower! (I hope I’m not kidding myself.)

Did your bridesmaids have a hard time coordinating your pre-wedding parties?