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I was very hesitant to post this out of sheer embarrassment (please don’t flame me!). I’m really ashamed to say that I’m back to 251 lbs. I was in the 240s, full steam ahead, and I just slowly stopped caring about weight loss. I’m still 13 lbs. down, but it hurts to read that scale in the morning with the weight I currently am. I think I have a curse in my head, because I’ve teetered around the 250s/260s and I want so badly to teeter in the 230s/240s!
I could blame birthday season, ice cream, or the stress of planning, but I blame myself and my dwindling willpower.
I still work out 2 times a week, but I used to work out 4-5 times a week.
I am starting back up with a brand new food journal now, and am devoting myself to food logging everyday. I just want to see the 230s on our big day, and I want to feel like I accomplished something. Right now I feel like (even though I’ve lost 13 lbs.) a tub of laziness.
Have you ever slacked on a goal but then went back on track? How did you do it?
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Share this post: My Personal Curse…
Hang in there woman! The same thing happens to me. I go full steam ahead and lose weight and then get lazy. I think the trick is to figure out what will keep you motivated to keep working on it. Changing the workout routine, even the workout venue helps me. I just have to keep telling myself that I want to be healthier. And I have someone help hold me accountable. I have a friend who’s trying to workout more also. So we check in with each other to see how the other person is doing and offer up advice, motivation when needed. Good luck!
I’ve relaxed a bit in the past few months, but last year (especially during the winter) it was just cardio, cardio, cardio! Changing how I was eating helped too. I wouldn’t say losing 30 lbs was easy - getting to the gym almost every day had it’s up’s and down’s - but once you get yourself into the zone, you just start going on auto pilot.
Involve Mr. BF as well! Mr. S is my main motivator and cheerleader which helps a lot on the days i just don’t want to do it.
Good luck, and regardless you’ll look gorgeous on your wedding day 
Don’t get discouraged Miss BF!! The bottom line is that you are beautiful at any weigh, but I don’t think there is a woman out there that cannot sympathize with your situation and remember a time when their thinking was exactly the same as yours. Think about it this way, you are ALMOST there! It is very easy to get discouraged and focus on the number on the scale, but look at it from another perspective: You are ONLY 2 LBS away from the 240, and then you are only 10 LBS away from the 230s. You are more than halfway to your goal with the 13 lbs wieght loss so far, and the only reason I say this is because I am all too familiar with the all-or-nothing attitude. If you get to a weight you automatically qualify as “bad”, it is all over and not worth trying. My FI told me something he has to think about every day: each moment is a moment to start over, to begin again. If you didn’t work out today, you have to tomorrow. Don’t let each day snowball into another. Sorry, I rambled on there for a little, I am feeling slightly discourage this afternoon but trying to fight it. Regardless, you will look beautiful!
I just starve myself for couple of weeks before my wedding. not a good suggestion. lol I also did spray tanning which made me look like i was 10lbs lighter.
First off all, -13 is FABULOUS! Celebrate this new moment of commitment! You’re taking all the right steps– logging is a must.
I also share your curse. I was down 87 pounds and got myself down to a healthy and hott size 16. I put on 15 pounds at the start of this school year due to my own mismanagement of stress, but I’ve recommited as of this month.
I keep thinking– I will feel confident in my wedding photos! (Especially given what I’m paying our photographer– LOL)
Stay confident, and TRUST in yourself! You can do it!
Miss BF, it’s all about momentum! That’s why brushing aside all your discipline too many times in a short period can wreak havoc on your progress. It was my downfall so many times. The good news is, you know how good it feels to see results and can use that as a motivator to get backon track. I know you didn’t mean to get yourself here, and all you can do is decide that tomorrow is going to be different. You know that working out twice a week isn’t going to get you to where you want to be. You know it. Now change it. You did it once, and I have total confidence you can do it again!
I can’t totally relate! I had been steadily loosing and then I stopped paying attention for a couple weeks and all the weight came right back. I have a hard time sticking with things and I can get very lazy.
It is REALLY hard to not beat yourself up. It is hard to not give up and say “damn it! this is never go to work! Other girls can lose weight, but not me. I am lazy, I just have to accept it”
My words of encouragement are that just because you slack and have to start over again…doesn’t mean you have to give up. You can just tell yourself “Ok, I fell off the wagon, I am mad at myself…but I went just a little bit off track but I can start right back on it today”
I got back on track 2 weeks ago and am now right back to wherer I was when I got off track. You can do it!!
But also..losing weight isn’t everything. You are beautiful and will make such a pretty bride regardless of what number the scale says.
Hi Miss BF! I agree with Miss Stiletto that no matter what, you will be gorgeous on your wedding day. But also…that Mr. BF or another good friend you trust could be a great support system if they, too, jump on the food journal & exercise train with you. I also other agree with previous posters who say the trick is finding what will keep you motivated. 13 lbs is a fantastic accomplishment and maybe thinking back to how great it felt when you lost those 13 will help. Good luck!
Don’t get down on yourself, Miss BF. Weight loss is all about the mental game, so, even though you want to beat yourself up, that won’t change anything or help you lose weight. Just say “tomorrow is a brand new start” and do what you know to do! You should be so proud that you’ve lost 13 pounds!
Cheer up, Miss BF! Thirteen pounds is nothing to be ashamed of. You are better off than you were before the weight loss and on your way to losing more. Everyone has struggles with this. Just keep your eye on the prize!
BF, I don’t think there is a person on the planet who lost a significant amount of weight without any hang ups. Keep on trucking…you rule!
OMG I am right there with you. I tend to get really down on myself and defeated when those numbers on the scale go the wrong direction.
I find that weighing myself really frequently helps me stay focused on my goal because even if that scale just moves 1 number in the right direction I feel better.
And I know that if I weigh myself after a bad day that I will be motivated to do better tomorrow and make those numbers move down!
I know a lot of nutritionist say don’t weigh yourself daily but I am a little ADD when it comes to dieting and I think that if I have an entire week before my next weigh in that I can skip workouts and eat poorly for the first half of the week and then semi starve myself the last half which is so NOT healthy. And it leads to NO permanent change.
A diet for me has have a daily reminder of what i am trying to achieve to really work. And stepping on that scale every morning motivates me and shows me instantly what is going on with my body.
I’m right there with you! I used to do Weight Watchers (and am still a member hoping I can get the motivation to go back). One quote that has stayed with me from there goes along with a lot of comments above, “Remember that if you stray, you’re always only one meal away from regaining success.” This has helped me not have the attitude that if I screw up at lunch I have a free ticket to eat whatever I want. I know you can do it!!!
I am going through the same thing. My wedding is in December and I keep telling myself that I have plenty of time to take weight off. Unfortunately, I don’t want to take engagement photos or look at wedding dresses until I lose at least ten pounds. I think that it will be easier to get back on track once it starts getting warm. Nothing like thighs rubbing together in a summerdress to get you focused!
This is going to sound super cheese, but repeating this phrase this has helped me on my weight-loss journey, especially as I get down to the crunch time before the wedding: “I’m in it to win it!” I know that is so lame but when someone brings cake to the office, I repeat this to myself (and also psych myself out by saying, I’d much rather have delicious, lucious buttercream frosting on my wedding day than Crisco-plastic supermarket frosting on a regular Tuesday afternoon). You can do it, BF! You’ve come so far. You are in it to win it!
@lgpharm:
So true! Your weight is always going to be in flux depending on a lot of factors - eating, exercise, time of the month, stress, etc. I can be up 2 lbs one day and down two day the next without a lot of work…it just changes.
Also - the more you keep up with a healthy routine the better you metabolism is going to get, so you can take a day off and it’s not going to hinder your progress. You just have to get yourself to that point by being consistent.
Wow, I sound like a dorky health nut. Mr. S has taught me a lot since we started working out together
I have most DEFINITELY lost track and then come back! Don’t beat yourself up about it. The food journal will help immensely! What I did was right down what I was eating just before I ate it because it made me be honest with what I logged and made me reconsider if I really wanted to have to write it in the log… if you wait, you might forget to write it down. It’s a lot easier to convince yourself not to do something if you’re thinking about how you have to write down right then and there.
South Beach. My fiance and I have both lost 15 pounds in just a month or so. Even my mom is doing South Beach for the wedding and she’s lost almost 20 lbs.
The fiance and I went on vacation last week and gained some back, but SB allows for that, kind of; the author says that is realistic that you’ll gain weight when on vacation or during stressful time. To fix it you just start Phase 1 again (no carbs, low fat, lots of veggies for two weeks) and you’re guaranteed to be back on track.
You should read the book. It makes a lot of sense and I learned lots about how food effects me.
Good luck and remember that no one will notice a few extra pounds. It should be more about you being healthy and happy on your wedding day! 
I can TOTALLY relate!! My wedding is in July and I HAD been working out everyday for the last month. I lost about 10 lbs and i was 20 away from my goal. The last two weeks I have worked out a total of 2 times. I Gained 3 lbs, I have still been sticking to my diet. I think I got a litle discouraged becuase I didn’t see faster results. It happens, just get back on that horse girl. Everytime I want to quit I picture my dress, how nice it will look without the “pouch” lol!!! Good Luck!!
You can do it! I track food on The Daily Plate, now run through Lance Armstrong. They have an awesome database and it’s free!
I think the thing is you need to get to a point where you realize and accept that working out is a lifestyle thing, not just to lose x pounds. I hate working out - and I mean I HATE it. But I’ve come to the realization that even if I hit my goal weight, I still need to work out 3-4 times per week. If you stop once you hit your goal, it all comes back. I guess the other thing is to remember that this is more than just a number on a scale - it’s a health decision. When I’m not feeling motivated, I try to remind myself that my father had a heart attack at 48 - and he wasn’t even that big. Luckily he made it through just fine, but he got VERY lucky - right place, right time sort of thing. That helps get me on the treadmill or makes me back away from the ice cream pretty fast!
Sarah - you have a point. I always go to Sommersizing (sp? Suzanne Somer’s diet) which is like a modified South Beach and is all about food combining. Whenever I gain a few pounds I always go back to the basics and it helps.
I love that weight watcher’s saying!
Wow! Look at all this great support… love it. I’m about to post about how I got back on track on the boards, but the short of it is that I totally changed my schedule to fit in more work-outs. It is HARD, but worth it. I’m strutting around today feeling like a million bucks.
Everyone gets off track every once in while. Please that is the story of my life. I’ve been eating right and working out, but not working out a much as I should and I’m starting to see results more
I’ve noticed, with me, the more results I see the more motivated I am. Once you get going again and start seeing results and feeling better, it will get easier
We all fall off the wagon , so don’t get too discouraged. Once you set your mind to it and proceed with your plan and start seeing a bit of result, that gets to be really easy. Honestly, I’d much rather be home and curl up next to FI, but I’ve got the momentum on my side, so I’m heading to the gym 3 or 4 times a week. Good luck!
I feel your pain, Miss Ballet Flat! I’ve had some success lately but ONLY because I found a really good reason for losing weight. I am dieting out of moral support for my diabetic dieting dad, but before that when I would tell myself, “for REAL this time!” I always fell off the wagon. Why can’t we put ourselves first? I think that’s the key. Put yourself first. Not the food, not the habits, not the wedding. Yourself.
Don’t get too down on yourself. We all do this. Maybe finding someone to make you accountable for your workouts would be good. You know someone that would know if you missed a work out. That someone has to be someone that you trust enough not to make you feel needlessly guilty (for instance you really just were too tired or sick to work out), but will remind you that someone knows you should work out. That sometimes motivates me.
I was 245lbs myself and with my fiance we both we to the gym at our complex and worked out on the tredmills and some weights…more weights for him than me! We have stopped with the tredmill over the winter season and now he has a gym in our apt…but i have only done a little here and there. Im proud to say Im now 205-208…but I want to get motivated to be less than a size 16. Ill be trying on gowns in May and I was hoping not to have flabby arms and belly…so I know what you’re going through…its tough. Stress stinks bad…but then when I do work out I feel great and less stressful…I guess Im just lazy! Seeing him keeping the workout up helps me to be motivated and knowing that I will be trying on gowns soon! Good luck to you as well.
As a former smoker and someone who has been chronically overweight, I think losing weight is like quitting smoking. You *really* have to want it. Of course, we all want to be healthy, look good, fit into those pants, etc but those are 2 different types of motivation. It takes a number of attempts before you are successful. I’ve lost 80 lbs over 3 yrs with 30 to go. It’s not easy (hello, 3 yrs to lose and maintain 80 lbs).
Some lessons that help me: 1) track everything — I use excel and keep track of all of my calories, weight loss, inches, and exercise. I notice trends in eating and working out which help me make sense of my behaviors. 2) Surround myself with healthy people. I read a ‘zillion blogs! In some weird way, weight loss/food bloggers are like my friends and they help motivate me 3) Find exercise you like to do. If you like bicycling, do that instead of walking on a treadmill. On days where I am not feeling it, I do Jillian Michael’s 30 day shred for a great 25 min workout. 4) Set short-term goals. Instead of focusing on losing 50 lbs by xx/xx, Try 8 lbs by the end of April. 5) Podcasts! Books on tape! Books/Magazines on health! These are things that I listen to when I work out, do computer work, etc. It helps motivate and distract me 6) Stop comparing yourself with you x # of pounds ago. I used to ALWAYS compare myself to my skinniest but I have to like things about myself in this size. 7) Meal planning has been my biggest help. I used to struggle with what to make for dinner on a random night but now, I know what I making when. I make 1 casserole, soup, or stew for the week and then plan 2 - 4 easy to make meals. I plan for cereal/oatmeal/frozen left overs for the other nights. 
Lose the all or nothing approach. For example, good is having a light salad/soup for dinner; bad is ice cream w/a brownie. Learn to factor in all food types. If you go astray, make better choices immediately. If you make bad lunch choices don’t let yourself give into bad dinner choices because you fouled up. Have a healthier dinner and continue on. Don’t wait ’til Monday or next month to start over! You can start over right away.
whew! I don’t know where all of that came from I think once you find your groove, it gets easy. Starting back up is *tough* Best of luck! You can do it!
When I get tempted to cheat on the diet or not work out, I usually say to myself, “I’ve worked my butt off to lose ___ lbs. Is this piece of chocolate/pizza/ice cream/pasta/beer/etc worth it?” Usually I can resist with that thinking.
If not, then I take a small bite, savor it and then either imagine it covered with something really gross (like pubic hair), physically have it taken away, or pour something really unappetizing on it (like ketchup on cake).
I agree with a previous comment to try South Beach, but I know that it’s not everyone’s cup of tea…I’ve been on it since the 1/1/09 and have so far lost just over 10% of my starting body weight. I just started exercising a couple weeks ago (30 Day Shred, 3 times a week and nothing the other days).
Good luck! I know you’ll be able to do it!
I wish I was down 13 lbs! I’ve recently started gaining momentum again and lost 2 pounds! Just keep going! And don’t completely cut out sweets. If you want ice cream, brownies, EAT THEM! But in little portions. THat’s what I’m doing and so far it’s working! You can do it!
Oh Miss Ballet Flat- I do wish you wouldn’t buy into the stereotypical socially dictated ideal!!! Your FI loves you regardless of what the scale reads! You get plenty of exercise- focus on your health and fitness instead of the # of lbs.
I’m plus size too- I’m in the 230s too. I encourage your fitness goals, but don’t get stuck on the number. Why is our weight a huge embarrassment? Should I be ashamed to leave my house because I’m a big huge 230+ Gargantua?
I like to think that Weddingbee a supportive community for brides of every shape, size, color, creed, orientation, etc.
Wedding preparations were a little hard on my self-esteem- so much of wedding prep seems to involve weight loss for so many brides. As a molecular biologist, I know all too well that the chances of me maintaining a dramatic weight loss for any period of time is slim to none (please don’t anyone regale me with success stories- we all know someone who is the exception to the rule). Over 95% (depending on who you cite) of people who lose weight will re-gain it, and typically wind up heavier than when they started.
I’ve made a concerted effort to be healthy at my size (keeping active, not overeating or eating too much unhealthful foods, etc). I know may people don’t believe that fat people aren’t sitting at home eating deep fried Twinkies 12 hours a day, but it’s true!
I’ve found some encouragement and support at the site below that is part of the “Health At Every Size” (HAES) movement, perhaps you can too?!
Congratulations on your fitness (not just weight loss) achievements!
Stay positive Miss BF! You can do it, believe in yourself and find ways to make healthy living work for you! Don’t let yourself obsess. If you want to eat something and are obsessing over it let yourself eat it, just don’t eat TONS of it. And then let it go, you ate something bad, thats fine, move on and focus on your next meal. Even if you don’t exercise every day make yourself move a little more.
I was discouraged when I wasn’t seeing the scale moving so I decided to start measuring & weighing myself every Wednesday and even if I don’t loose weight its nice to see myself losing inches. Also, it helps to set goals every Monday and write them down, give them to someone else so you are accountable.
Figure out the way to make weight loss work for you. You can do it, you are a strong beautiful woman and will be happy/proud of yourself when you walk down the aisle feeling good about your body!
You’re so brave for posting this! Don’t give up - if you did it once, you can certainly do it again. Try Googling the Hacker’s Diet… its philosophy is what’s helping me stay on track right now. Stay positive!
Chin up!! You can do it- I know you can!!! You’re amazing and don’t forget that.
@Miss Stiletto: Great idea! Mr. BF is always a motivator…he reminds me I’m beautiful but is always first to notice when I lose weight!!
@flbeachbride: Wow…thanks. I totally get what you’re saying here!
@AmberWaves: Great idea! I have been wanting to get back into running and jamming to my own music. Lately, I go to aerobics with the same Nelly Furtado and Jordin Sparks remixes LOL!
@Denise: WOW!! 87 lbs. is amazing! Congrats on your progress!!
@West Coast Bride: I couldn’t agree more….when you get in that groove, the pounds melt off. It’s just time to get in that groove again!
@spraguebride: Thank you. I know I’m confident I will feel beautiful on the big day!
@laural: I’m the same way. I have to see the daily progress…I weigh myself right when I wake up in the morning, so there’s no food in my stomach.
@kaanai: I totally hear you! I have to wear shorts under my dresses so my thunder thighs don’t rub.
@D.Marie: Wow!! Congrats on your weight loss so far!
@Annalisa: Thanks for taking the time to write out all those tips
@lise: I’ll have to check that out!
To everyone else, I feel like I should reply to everyone individually but I would be repeating the Thank yous….so thank you all for your support and encouragement…it really helps.
Sometimes there are set-backs but keep pushing forward towards your goal and I know you will accomplish it. Don’t focus on losing weight but becoming healthier…..
MY ADVICE: keep up the food journal and allow yourself one small cheat per day from a regular diet of veggies, fruit, lean meats and whole grain (pasta/bread/rice). try and do some form of exercise EVERY day with one rest day per week. Even if it’s just a 30 minute walk after supper make sure you do it. Not to lose weight but to become a healthier you so that you can live you life as full and as long as you are allowed Good luck and keep trying. You can do it!
I’d say find someone to exercise with you! It’s so much easier to diet or workout when the people you are around are doing it too! That way when when of you doesn’t feel up to it the other can be the voice that says you really do want to eat well or exercise. When left to my own devices I give up after about a month. I’m really proud of the progress you’ve already made! I think it’s great!
My own personal diet rules: Don’t starve yourself, but if you tend to overeat cut down on portion sizes. And try to avoid eating out, you don’t know what’s in the food and the portions are huge. I personally never quit till I’m already stuffed. Keep snacks around that you like but are at least somewhat healthy. I love sugar and chocolate but I try to eat fat free pudding instead of a candy bar, yogurt, and natural applesauce (I add cinnamon which makes it taste sweeter). And exercise is crucial. Go for walks everyday (I read something that said you should walk your dog twice a day even if you don’t have a dog) and don’t burn yourself out every time you start going back to the gym after a hiatus. I hope this helps!
Stress is probably a bigger factor than you think. Not just general wedding stress, but stress to lose weight. I had gained 25lbs from mediciation after I bought my dress off the rack, and I was really stressed out and terrified. Other than magical carb free shiritake noodles, I tricked myself into cardio. I signed up for dance classes (hip hop and modern-so fun). I also ebay-ed Dance Dance Revolution so I could dance at home. 13lbs is nothing to sneeze at! Bravo!
Have you tried fitday.com? You can log in every single piece of food you eat and every movement you make be it exercise or lifestyle, and then you set a reasonable weight loss goal and it calculates everything - And it’s FREE.
Basic rules, move more than you eat (which you can check on a daily basis at fitday.com using the calories eaten vs calories burned for the day, week, or month(s))… It’s a super great way to stay concious of what you may be doing to sabotage your weight loss
Also as a general rule: Be sure to drink half your body weight in water (fluid ounces) every day - we usually over eat because our brains do not differentiate between thirsty and hungry (We are usually thirsty) - If you drink caffine be sure to add (additional) equal fluid ounces of water to balance out the caffine. (beter yet avoid caffine, and limit salt intake - this way you can more easily stick to the 125fl of water daily) - Get a brita filter pitcher, and a few large water bottles to take with you daily - by the end of the day if you finished all of your water you will start to flush away pounds.
It’s tedious, but it really is that simple - believe it or not - and while it is best for you to fill up on fruits and veggies, if you burn more than you eat in a day hypothetically you can eat whatever you want… (but you would have to work out pretty hard to eat a calzone/strombolli - I love those and have to limit myself to one a month to keep on track - it ruins my stats for the day, but balances out in the month…)
You’ll figure it out, and don’t get too stressed out, Mr. BF picked you because he loves you and thinks that you are beautiful how you are -Weddings are all about love, not dress sizes
We are not our bodies, we are so much more
Oh yeah, and P.S. my new husband is an executive chef, so I really have to stay on my game… I’m fed well, and It can be quite the challenge - If I did not rely on fitday.com, I could spiral out of control really easily.
I usually eat super low-cal during the day, and make sure that I work out several times a week because the dinners can be super calorious (oooh I think I just made up a new word…)
Good luck with everything, and do not beat your self up - keep a healthy body image regardless of your size!!!
Don’t be embarrassed, Ballet Flat. Weight loss is hard! Especially if you do it right. You’re still on the right track. Just try to put it in perspective. It’s more important that you try to develop a healthy lifestyle and habits that you will keep forever versus just trying to get down to a certain weight in time for your wedding. Good luck!
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Mrs. Ballet Flat, New Orleans
Age and Occupation: 24, Geographic Information Systems Analyst
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, IT Analyst
Engagement Date: March 16, 2008
Wedding Date: May, 2009
Blogging Since: September 25, 2008
Venue: St. Charles Borromeo Church/Jefferson-Orleans North
About Me: I absolutely love wedding planning, spending time with Mr. Ballet Flat, various crafts, watching football, baking, pop music, bargain hunting and ice cream. My idea of a great date night is dinner and clearance shopping with Mr. Ballet Flat! I currently live below sea level in the suburbs near New Orleans, where I make maps all day, everyday for my job. I'm slowly becoming more and more obsessed with anything New Orleans related for our wedding, and I can't wait for the big day!
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