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Mrs. Joey, Seattle Age and Occupation: 28, Project Administrator for Public Health NGO Fiance's Age and Occupation: 30, High School History Teacher Engagement Date: June 24, 2008 Wedding Date: August 2009 Venue: Eastside Catholic Chapel and Lake Union Cafe About Me: I'm a Seattle girl through and through except for the fact that I don't drink coffee. I love my job most of the time because I get to travel and work with brilliant people who are trying to prevent Malaria. I love DIY projects of all sorts, cooking, and watching sports. I'd wear anything at Anthropologie and could spend all day on Etsy. I love to travel but shouldn't because I always get myself into unbelievable situations!
About Mrs. Joey

Somebody, Please Take Our Money!

April 23rd, 2009 @ 10:56 am by Mrs. Joey

I thought finding a reception space was hard until FMIL asked me to look for a rehearsal dinner spot. The requirements? A place for 35 people to dine for about $25-30 a head (not including, tax, tip or beverages), serve wine and beer, have some vegetarian options, and will serve family style (no pizza). Oh, on a Friday night around 6PM-ish. Sounds easy enough, right? Wrong! I’ve dealt with 6 different restaurants, some leading me on, and others flat out telling me that they were not willing to lose that Friday night business.

I’m not trying to arrange a budget dinner at a 5 star restaurant. All the places I looked had main courses that feed 2-3 people for $10-15 a piece. I’m (well, my FILs are) willing to spend over $30 a head for a 2-hour dinner. I think the math says our group is more lucrative.

I have to say that I am really amazed that people don’t want our money.

A family style dinner that we’ll order 2 or 3 months ahead of time? It doesn’t seem too complicated. I’ll spare you the details about the restaurants that haven’t worked. Let’s just say one place lacked serious customer service skills.

Since finding a venue has been so hard, we’ve had to think outside the box, or rather, in it. The first place that came to mind that was a little different was a sandwich shop called Baguette Box. They serve gourmet versions of Bahn Mi (Vietnamese sandwiches). Their sandwiches are to die for. Crispy tofu braised in coconut juice? Yum! They also have very good sides and delicious truffle fries. The only thing about this place is that it closes at 5PM, and doesn’t serve alcohol. I called anyway, just to inquire if a private party was possible. I have to say, I was so happy to get someone nice on the phone. The manager like the idea of holding the rehearsal dinner there. The place only seats 20, but we’d have the whole place to ourselves to mingle. I asked him if we could bring in our own wine if we purchase a banquet license, and he said he would check. All I got at the end of the call was promise that the manager would call the owner and find out if my idea was an option, but that was enough for me. I hope it works out.

I told Mr. Joey the news when I got home and while he was also excited about the prospects of Baguette Box, he warned me not to get my hopes up. So we set about trying to come up with more options. Mr. Joey suggested we go back to our original catering/reception venue list and look at all the places that were way too small for our reception. Voila! We found 3 caterers we really liked who came in our price range and had their own space. I sent bid requests and I have my fingers crossed that something good will come out of it.

If I had my way, we’d do a BBQ or something at home. The Joey FILs want to avoid that, since the wedding is so early the next day. They don’t want people to spend a lot of time cooking and cleaning the day before, and that makes sense.

Anyone else have a lot of problems coming up with a venue for their rehearsal dinner?

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27 Responses to “Somebody, Please Take Our Money!”

1.
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Bee
Miss Stiletto (message)  759 posts, Busy bee

Don’t even get me started! It’s so hard to find places in our budget that aren’t Italian (not that I don’t like Italian, I’d just like some variety, people!)…and also finding a place that’s close to the church/hotel so that people can have fun and not worry about driving around. Ergh. I just try and not think about it too much until we absolutely have to.

Good luck in finding your place!

 
2.
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Member
tatrifon (message)  239 posts, Helper bee

I’m completely frustrated too! There doesn’t seem to be anything in NYC even within a $30 per person price range.
I’m just going to end up doing a cocktail hour at our home, I think.

 
3.
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Bee
Miss Peep Toe (message)  1,636 posts, Bumble bee

Good luck!! It took us forever to nail down a place- and yes, I think I contacted just as many places for the RD than the wedding itself.

 
4.
Mrs. DG
Hostess
Mrs. DG (message)  4,227 posts, Honey bee

Since we’re welcoming the whole crew with the rehearsal dinner, we had to bite the bullet and go with a BBQ. I had visions of an elegant and intimate rehearsal dinner with a few speeches and hugs among our closest friends and family…

Well, for the very reasons you mention, that’s not going to happen!

(And I agree, baguette box is spectacular!)

 
5.
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Guest
Caitlin

I had the same problem with very rude owners of restaurants. They didn’t want to lose their Saturday night business (apparently Friday would have been fine). They hemmed and hawed and were condescending. We even offered to have an early dinner, say around 4:30 or 5 and we would be out by 7, but no luck. Anyways, we finally found this lovely restaurant that will rent us out the whole place for the night for only $500. So all night to ourselves without having to share the restaurant with strangers! YEA!

 
6.
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Bee
Miss Bruschetta (message)  5,553 posts, Bee Keeper

I definitely did — super-high minimums meant we couldn’t have it close to the ceremony location, so we moved it into the city!

 
7.
frenchbulldog
Bee
frenchbulldog (message)  6,063 posts, Bee Keeper

Don’t get me started! Ugh! We finally found a place and them my mom added ppl to the list and we couldn’t be there anymore! Our main problem was finding a place that wasn’t more that our wedding venue.

 
8.
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phruphru (message)  180 posts, Blushing bee

This is the part where y’all hate me: I found our rehearsal dinner spot in just a few minutes. I found a restaurant my family likes, found out about the packages and plunked down a deposit. In NYC, no less!! Anyway, we did do some window shopping, just in case, and we were really pleasantly surprised at some of the packages offered by the Asian restaurants nearby. I know Sri Lankan is not the same as Indian but the food is somewhat similar; have you tried looking at Indian restaurants? They are often used to accomodating giant parties and they are definitely vegetarian friendly. We looked at two Indian restaurants and both said they could even put an Italian pasta dish or a non-spicy lo mein dish on the buffet (my family has a few non-adventurous eaters — not that Indian food is so nuts or anything). Anyway, just a thought!

 
9.
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Bee
Miss Duckling (message)  1,349 posts, Bumble bee

I think we are doing a catered dinner at my house. That way they bring everything in and clean up etc. But I still have to start looking for caterers…

 
10.
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Bee
Miss Joey (message)  829 posts, Busy bee

@phruphru: You are so lucky. We tried chinese, vietnamese, indian, thai, american (what ever that is) and northwest. No luck.

 
11.
Miss Bear Cub
Bee
Miss Bear Cub (message)  1,351 posts, Bumble bee

banh mi rehearsal dinner? That sounds AWESOME!! I love banh mis!! (I found out in vietnam that banh mi actually just means french bread sandwich - do you know if there’s a special name for the delicious banh mis at baguette box?)

 
12.
lunapark
Member
lunapark (message)  85 posts, Worker bee

We did what Miss Duckling suggested and it was great! Minimal clean up, no one hurrying you out the door, great food delivered to the house - super easy and everyone had a great time.

 
13.
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Member
ES123 (message)  1,024 posts, Bumble bee

I have run into this with restaurants, day spas, tons of places. Aren’t we in a recession?! Don’t people want guaranteed money? I don’t understand it, either.

 
14.
Lillindy
Hostess
Lillindy (message)  4,255 posts, Honey bee

We did a catered dinner at my in-laws, so not really any cleanup. But, we also did it two days before the wedding on a Thursday. That could be an option where maybe you can get a restaurant to actually take your money.

 
15.
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Guest
harmonyeee

We’re having about 25 people for the rehearsal dinner, but decided to go a little more casual and have a bowling party! the alley we booked at his a private lounge with its own lanes and a private bar. we’re choosing a few platters and some desserts to serve, and will have an open bar. i hope its fun!

 
16.
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Bee
Miss Joey (message)  829 posts, Busy bee

@lunapark: &@Lillindy: We thought about this. My parents house will be full of stuff. They have lots of people staying with them that week. My FILs live in South Carolina and our apartment is too small. I had really hoped to do it at our new house (even if it’s not entirely done) but my Dad said he can’t guarentee the toilets will be functions by then.

 
17.
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Member
googleLiz (message)  21 posts, Newbee

We’re getting carryout or delivery? from Macaroni Grill family style and just doing this at our house. We’ve got about 25.

 
18.
mmc4474
Member
mmc4474 (message)  71 posts, Worker bee

Do you have a Buca Di Beppo in your area? They are an AWESOME Italian restaurant, that specializes in group parties and the menu is family style. It’s not just pizza, and I love the food…just a thought!

 
19.
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Guest
glacee

I think a lot of restaurants don’t like to rent out their dining room for a night because they worry about turning away regulars and upsetting people who try to eat there that night.

Even if in the end they’d be making more money, they probably worry about leaving a bad impression on those they have to turn away.

 
20.
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Guest
CES

You should go to FareStart - it is right by Westlake downtown. it is a non profit and a restaurant, the chefs are people who need training for jobs and are getting back on their feet. Great food and they have a room for 35 people you can rent on Fridays since they aren’t a full time restaurant (lunches mostly I think). We looked at it for our R dinner but then decided to elope.

good luck!!
Carrie

 
21.
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Guest
CES

You should go to FareStart - it is right by Westlake downtown. it is a non profit and a restaurant, the chefs are people who need training for jobs and are getting back on their feet. Great food and they have a room for 35 people you can rent on Fridays since they aren’t a full time restaurant (lunches mostly I think). We looked at it for our R dinner but then decided to elope.

good luck!

 
22.
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Bee
Miss Joey (message)  829 posts, Busy bee

@CES: We looked at Fare Start. I really wanted to do it there but the rental fee for the resturant puts us way over budget.

 
23.
chickasjf
Member
chickasjf (message)  155 posts, Blushing bee

We also had a huge problem trying to find a place for Friday night. We wanted a local (non chain) resturant that would do family style. After being told, in a not so nice way, that our business was not as good as the regular friday night crown by no less thatn 8 different places, I was getting a little discouraged. I finally had to call in a favor at a chain resturant, friends with the manager, it’s not what we hoped for but it will do.

 
24.
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Guest
lychee510

hmm how about going for an idea of Chinese restuarants? They are usually reasonable in that price range and can find a nice looking venue as well as great yummy food ..if there are some in your area

 
25.
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Guest
CES

what about Portage Bay Cafe, Tulios, Dukes Chowder House in Greenlake and take over the patio, um… this is hard! If you have mostly in-town guests, you could have dinner 5-7, so restaurants aren’t missing revenue.

 
26.
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Bee
Miss Joey (message)  829 posts, Busy bee

@CES: I know right? :) We’re going to a tasting at Portage Bay next week. They are on the very short list. Duke’s isn’t going to work, we have a seafood allergy.

 
27.
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Member
choover (message)  11 posts, Newbee

YES! I totally identify with this. When my fiance told one restaurant manager what our budget is, he suggested McDonalds. We walked out and never looked back! We did end up finding a great place though, don’t give up!

 


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Mrs. Joey Mrs. Joey, Seattle Age and Occupation: 28, Project Administrator for Public Health NGO Fiance's Age and Occupation: 30, High School History Teacher Engagement Date: June 24, 2008 Wedding Date: August 2009 Venue: Eastside Catholic Chapel and Lake Union Cafe About Me: I'm a Seattle girl through and through except for the fact that I don't drink coffee. I love my job most of the time because I get to travel and work with brilliant people who are trying to prevent Malaria. I love DIY projects of all sorts, cooking, and watching sports. I'd wear anything at Anthropologie and could spend all day on Etsy. I love to travel but shouldn't because I always get myself into unbelievable situations!
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