Wedding Blog
Um, well hopefully not ALL of them, but I’m crossing my fingers for one in particular (that’s you, Mr. Gloss).
As we discussed here, my workout regimen is not going so hot, so I figure the next best thing to actual weight loss is a weight loss illusion… i.e., SPANX!!
Hey – a girl is allowed to have a little help, right? Fake it till you make it, ladies.
Who knew there were so many SPANX options? The girl at Nordstrom was SUPER helpful—we had a very informative Q&A:
Q: Will I have a muffin top around my leg where the Spanx stop? (Because let’s face it, the only thing worse than a regular muffin top is a mid-thigh muffin top.)
A: Nope, the Spanx are sewn all the way back up to the top of the leg, so there is no seam on the thigh itself.
Q: Is it going to slide down as I’m walking/dancing/standing/sitting?
A: It might, if you don’t pull it up all the way in the back. Pull it up all the way in the back and you will be fine, tuck it under your bra strap if you can, or at least make sure it is as high as that, and there will be no slippage.
Q: Um, my dress doesn’t go up that far in the back – is it going to be an issue (and by issue, I mean extra muffin-top) if I wear them lower?
A: No – your rib-cage is pretty thin, so you shouldn’t have a problem by wearing them lower. *Internal thoughts: What? Me? Something thin? - I heart you saleslady.*
Q: Do you have any? Do you love them?
A: Yes and yes. I wear them every day (pulls up dress to prove it).
I opted for the mid-thigh to boob option in nude, aka, “Higher Power”, thinking it will be the most useful pre- and post-wedding. I haven’t tried it on with my dress yet to see if it makes a difference, but it’s actually pretty comfy. And as all comfy and controlling things go – it’s pretty much everything BUT that cute, stand-alone, jaw-dropping sexy garment you want to be secretly hidden under your perfect dress for um, post-wedding Twister.
Um, yeah – see the difference? Do you think Mr. Gloss will notice?
Is anyone else signed up for a little wedding day assistance in the undergarment department?
Images: 1 & 2 from Spanx.com, 3 from La Perla.com
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Share this post: My Spanx Will Bring All the Boys to the Yard…
Oh boy, I’ve got my own undergarment story I’ll hafta post about — not so much an issue worthy of Spanx, but I’m definitely going to need assistance as well. (For me, in the chestal region.)
I wonder if they have a spanx thats just for the midsection and rear. I’m worried about one of the shorts ones being visible under my short dress. I need some serious torso help, and situps are just not my forte. 
Oh god, the title of your post is hilarious. Now I have that song in my head. Thanks, Gloss.
No spanx for me, but pushup needed!
@Miss Bruschetta: I’m waiting for this post! My barely A’s and I need advice!
I tried all the spanx options, and couldn’t wear the kind you purchased because I guess I have a big rib cage. I had a little overflow going on in certain areas, so I got the wacoal shorts. I was sad because it would have been awesome to have the full smoothness of the spanx. But my little shorts do a great job too. Thank you for blogging about it too, before I went to buy I checked all the blogs so I would know what to expect, they helped a lot!
Best Spanx moment from my wedding: I had changed into a shorter dress for the end of the reception, and it was getting late and down to the last few guests. I saw all the comfy couches in the lobby of the hotel just as we were about to leave, and, emboldened by my Spanx, I decided I need to do a handstand/front walkover over the back of the couch. Luckily I executed it perfectly, so much so that I was trying to convince my brother’s girlfriend to try it. “Buy I’m wearing a dress!” she protested. “It’s ok, your Spanx will keep you decent!” I countered. Apparently she wasn’t wearing any, but she tried it anyway.
I am planning to buy that exact same one!
This is my 1st time using spanx
Yeah I have spanx that I am wearing under my dress I am more worried about bathroom time but oh well. Better to have issues there than not fitting the dress right,
Also Rue La La is having a sale on spanx- you can pm me if you need an invite.
@Miss Mary Jane: they do! It’s like a full panty/boy short and it rises to just under the breasts. Check the spanx website!
They do! I think this is what you’re referring to, I have one I bought for a short Halloween costume 
It worked for me and is comfortable.
http://www.spanx.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3533581&cp=2992553.3010022
It would help if I added a link
@Miss Mary Jane: That kind does show under shorter dresses when you sit down, so I’d definitely be careful w/ that. I wore mine under a suit that’s a tank dress w/ a jacket, and spent the whole day trying to pull my hemline down when i sat down.
Also, there’s two types. One is basically for smoothing, the other is for slimming. The smoothing one has a peice of gripping material around the top to stop slippage, while the slimming one has hooks and straps that you can use to hook the spanx to your bra. If you opt for the latter, definitely use the hooks. I don’t think I have a large ribcage, and I definitely had slippage issues when I tried wearing it w/out the hooks.
I am concerned about the kinda-red squeezed in all night look my body is going to have after the wedding when the Mr. helps me out of my gown? Does this not happen to others who wear spanx, or are we of the , pfft-he’s-married-to-me-now! opinion?
I have the higher power ones as well, not sure if I’ll need them for the wedding, but I do wear them quite a bit under dresses!
That’s the one I bought and wrote about way back when…http://www.weddingbee.com/2007/06/09/forget-losing-weight-for-the-weddingi-found-this/
One of the best things about it was that I pulled it up over the boning of the long-line bra I had purchased and it totally smoothed it out so the boning lumps didn’t show through the fabric of my dress!
I already warned him… I said that the sexy stuff is the stuff that’s just in the movies. These are undergarments that must be warn under the dress to “work” haha… he gives me the confused puppy dog face and was like “oh, okay”. So he just thinks everyone has to do it Haha…
Miss Gloss the post is hilarious! I love the title and your love for the saleslady hahaha… I would have felt the same way.
I tried Spanx once, but I don’t think I bought the right size b/c it didn’t help any. I’m lucky b/c my dress is a corset so it holds me in real good 
Mr Gloss will never notice if you sneak away to ditch them just before twister! Thats what I did!
Oh, for anyone else who is considering spanx, there is another similar brand called Go Figure. I went to dillards to get spanx and realized that the Go Figure was about the same… except in price. Spanx - $40. Go Figure (on sale) $6!! Just another option in case anyone is looking.
This interview cracks me up. I’m not sure what I’m doing yet.
A question I was wondering is how difficult is it to use the restroom?? I have a pair of knockoff spanx that I don’t like to wear to parties because of the difficulty in getting them back on.
I was thinking of wearing them with my dress, but I am a comfort gal, and when you gotta go you gotta go!
@Miss Purple: The crotch is ‘double gussetted’ whatever that means. I call it an ‘access hatch’, you don’t have to take them off, it’s more of a pulling to the side action - just be careful!!
@mdarrah: Good call!!
@Mrs. Corn: I wasn’t sure which way to wear it, over or under the longline - thanks for the tip!
@Miss French Bulldog: Thanks Frenchie!!
Haha, love the title and the Q&A, it’s cracking me up! I didn’t wear anything like that under my dress because for me personally I don’t find them to be that comfortable, and I realize I’m probably in the minority when I say that.
I am completely addicted to Spanx!
RueLaLa’s online sale on Spanx is about half off of regular prices. Oh joy! See my blog post for an invite link:
http://bellsandbouquets.blogspot.com/2009/04/spanx-sale-starts-tomorrow-at-ruelala.html
The sale started this morning and ends Friday (May 1st).
@Miss Purple: I also found them a bit difficult to take on and off when I went to the restroom and that was in a normal dress, in a real dress I couldn’t handle it, it would probably make me all flustered. And I didn’t use the pee hole in the crotch, that to me seems like an accident waiting to happen.
I just bought some spanx on Ruelala today for 1/2 off! If anyone wants an invite here is a link:
@clarerichardson: Man! I’m so angry I already bought them!! Thanks the links though - hope someone else can use them!
I bought the same ones! FI was horrified when he saw them as I took off the little black dress I wore them under a few weeks ago so I’m not sure that I can wear them under my real dress. If I do, I think I’ll have to a secret swap-out so as to not horrify him again
Hehehe…”Access hatch” LOL!!
I’ve used a generic form before, and I agree that the bust part rolling down is ANNOYING! I think that my dress will fit just fine without them, and in fact because I’ll have a hefty layer of crinoline, I plan to wear some uber sey red undies!!
I tried a pair to wear under my gown, but I decided against them because a) the dress makes me really warm anyway, so the fewer layers the better, and b) I am certain I’m going to have to go to the bathroom like four hundred times that day and I’d hate to either be rolling it up or down all night, or trying to navigate the “access hatch” as it’s been termed! I may keep the pair I have though to wear under other outfits, because they certainly do smooth everything out.
I won’t be needing any Spanx which is awesome. I have a corset top and a pick up bottom so its not form fitting at all. I just need to work on toning my arms, but I may have to get my some Spanx to wear under my other dresses until I start working out :/
@MarryingtheNavy: I’m VERY nervous about the overheating factor for our AUGUST wedding. I’m going to ‘heat factor’ test drive them once the temp. gets up there to see how bad it is
I bought the same ones you did to wear under my dress at my brother’s wedding. Before I wore them under a dress I was thinking about wearing them under my wedding dress. However I have changed my mind! It was really difficult to go to the bathroom with them on. Mine don’t have the “access hatch” in them so I have no option but to pull them all the way down. My WD has a corset back and I would literally have to take my dress off in order to get my SPANX back in place after going to the bathroom. I was also VERY worried about how my Mr. would react to them under my dress instead of some sexy pair. I’m still on the search for the right underthings.
@MrsSl82be: They need to make spanx for your arms!! I would totally buy them, provided they were invisible for armless dresses
@Miss Gloss: @Miss Gloss:
When I wore mine at my bros wedding on the 18th of April, it was I believe 85 degrees outside (it was an outdoor wedding). Let me tell you, they make you get hot!
Higher power is my saving grace. Without it, I would’ve had some curves in some very unfortunate places.
I LOVE my Spanx! Wearing them under my wedding dress, fo sho. They smooth everything out, and are super comfortable to boot!
Can I share my recommendation, having worn a wedding dress before? Don’t even bother with the nice undies (I mean, nice, but not NIIIICE) under your dress. Go for comfort and body-shaping.
When you get to your room after your wedding, if you don’t change before leaving (which might be a better option, you’ll see why), ask your new hubby JUST to unbutton the back of your dress and bra if you need help, THEN go into the bathroom and change into your super hot sexy things. Why? Because you will be nine kinds of hot and sweaty under that gown, and so will your undies, and your, um, parts. Seriously. Especially if you’re a dancer and like to boogie like I do. I don’t care how beauteous your undies are or how much your new hubby likes sweaty bodies, you’ll likely prefer to have washed off just a bit and “gotten ready” for the big night.
Just my two cents. Plus, then you can wear the crazy blue and black striped bustier that would show under your white dress. NOt that I know of what I speak.
when i said wanted to get some spanx, my fiance’s reaction was, “But you’re going to the gym!” 
i bought the Power Panties but honestly, they don’t seem to do anything for me… sigh!
@MrsCheese: Totally agree. Maybe a rubbadubdub in the tub first would be a good idea
Spanx for me too..and a waist cincher from Fredrick’s…I plan on ducking into the bathroom and changing into something more “vavavavroom” for the hubby, which of course makes me happy too..hehe…can’t wait for the honeymoon!!! yeah, baby!
thanks for your post..made me LOL at work.
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Mrs. Gloss, Boston/Maine
Age and Occupation: 24, Designer/soon-to-be Architect
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Systems Engineer
Engagement Date: May 23, 2008
Wedding Date: August 2009
Venue: SS Katahdin/Lakeside Tent
About Me: I don't like nickels or the skin that forms on pudding when it's in the fridge for too long. I couldn't live without Pantone markers, fountain soda (3/4 diet, ¼ regular Coke), run-on sentences, or ridiculously oversized sunglasses. I will try to DIY almost anything and am just OCD enough to make most of it work. I am truly excited about having all my family and friends together, becoming Mrs. Gloss, and having amazing photos to prove it!
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