Weddingbee Blog

After finding the perfect shoes, I was so excited for my first fitting earlier this week. But it ended with the seamstress storming out of the room, and me fighting to hold back tears. And this coming Monday, I’m scheduled for my second first fitting — prior to this, though, I need some advice from the hive. Okay, let me explain further.

Mama Bruschetta came along — Sister Bruschetta, my matron of honor, was unavailable (but we figured she wouldn’t miss much at this first visit). I first met with Cindy, the alterations consultant, who helpfully advised me on my undergarment issue — a topic for another post (in the near future, I promise!). Cindy then helped me into my gown (making me extremely happy, as evidenced by my grinning mug, below) and told us the seamstress would be in soon.

~~~ White dress ahead, Mr. Bruschetta! You don’t wanna see this yet! ~~~

From the minute she entered the room, the seamstress (let’s call her “Dee”) was all business. Great, right? In no time, she had the dress pinned along my bust (so it was no longer slipping down), and was kneeling on the floor beginning to tack the hem in place. While trying to remain comfortable — it was super challenging to stand perfectly still in my new 3 1/2-inch heels… especially considering it was an unusually balmy night (although it’s cooler out now, we were at the time having a summer preview here in the Philly area, with highs in the 90s!) and the alterations room was warm and stuffy — I snapped pictures of myself in the mirror and gabbed away with Mama Bru. Dee okayed my including her in some of the shots, chuckling at the fact that I was even capturing all this on film.

After she finished the front hem, Dee continued crawling around me to the back of my dress. Honestly, I didn’t think much of it — I was tired, too warm, and still giddy to be wearing my dress — until I glanced down and noticed she was about a quarter of the way through pinning up a bustle. Whoa! I definitely didn’t think we were going to even do the bustle at this appointment — and spoke up right away saying so. A language barrier hampered my communication with Dee, though, and she didn’t seem to fully (or immediately) understand that I wanted to discuss the type of bustle before pinning it up. When I couldn’t effectively make my bustle idea known to Dee, Mama Bruschetta went searching for Debbie, the consultant who sold me the gown.

Debbie helped me explain the bustle idea, and Dee took immediate offense. She argued that there was only one way to bustle this gown, and that if it’s done any other way, it would ruin the look altogether. Then, without allowing me to further clarify the idea, she began hastily pinning the bustle. As soon as it was complete, Dee stood up and clearly addressed me and Mama Bruschetta, telling us we’re making a huge mistake with the bustle, and that it will make the dress look terrible.

My consultant, Debbie, was actually in the room for this rude exit, and assured me not to worry, that Dee was just stuck in her old ways, not wanting to do anything different — and, frankly, that the original bustle she pinned was much easier to sew, thus her complaints about the second version. Mama Bruschetta snapped a few more pictures, and we left, feeling confused and rushed, and disappointed in the bridal salon.

Once home, I began Googling to find pictures of Melissa Sweet “Mila” bustles — something I would have preferred to do before the fitting, had I known I would be forced into a bustle by the end of the evening — and reviewed the pictures we’d taken of the controversial bustle. I knew I didn’t like the style Dee had started on her own, but something about the second version also bothered me. Soon, I’d found some inspiration photos, and after a quick pep talk call to Mama Bruschetta, left a difficult — but important — voice message for Cindy (the alterations consultant) to discuss the crazy night we’d just had… and my doubts about the bustle pinned on my gown.

The next day, Cindy and I connected, and she apologized for the way I’d been treated and the undue stress Dee had caused by her lack of communication and negative attitude. Cindy suggested I begin my alterations experience anew — but let me know the only other available seamstress works on Fridays during the day (not a feasible alternative for me). And so I took a deep breath — because, just as during the fitting, I was fighting to hold back tears — and let her know that as long as we could proceed without any further issues, working with Dee would be fine. I told Cindy I’d appreciate it if someone spoke to Dee, and that, while I understand Dee is the seamstress (and so she clearly knows much more than me about sewing and alterations), I’m the expert in how I want to look and feel on my wedding day — and Dee would need to acknowledge this.

(Just a note: I’d like to stay at this shop for my alterations, since I have access to my consultant if I have any questions or problems — and the contract I negotiated before purchasing the dress has a nice little cap on the amount alterations can cost… which I wouldn’t be guaranteed elsewhere!)

Phew! I hope you’re all still reading along — sorry for the oh-so long winded back story!

Before my next appointment (to which I’m happy to say both Mama and Sister Bruschetta will be able to come), I really need to firm up my bustle plan. I’ve got a few thoughts — and I know what I don’t want — so here are some pictures (with explanations) to give you a clearer idea:

I found this picture, which is similar to the style Dee was pinning when the fitting became awkward and uncomfortable. In her version, each of the points was just below the asymmetrical back, so you could see each gathered bit of fabric — not a look I like at all. (No offense, of course, to this bride, who looks lovely in her gown!)

(source)

Here’s the bustle that was on the gown when we left. It’s beautiful, but given the asymmetrical drop-waist and rouching, I don’t think the straight French bustle suits the gown. But what say you?

I found this bustle through a Knot message board. It’s… interesting. And definitely beautiful in its own way — it reminds me of the ruffles around a fancy parasol — but is it the right one for me?

(source)

Finally, there’s the bustle Weddingbee reader peony80 recently posted about, which comes closest to the style I think I prefer. It’s similar to Dee’s attempt, but just has a much more polished look, in my opinion.

Which style do you like best? (I really need your input and advice!) Did you have a hard time deciding on your bustle?