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I have a hard time dropping the f-bomb (and obviously I mean fiancé)! I always thought I would relish in the days of fiancé-ness, but now that I’m here, I feel pretentious whenever I say it. Usually I can avoid it by simply saying ‘Mr. Gloss’ rather than ‘my fiance’, but for people who don’t know his name, it is hard to avoid! Mostly this happens in work/elevator conversations, when discussing weekend plans, etc. with coworkers who may not know my fiancé’s name.
Before, I would say, “Oh, my boyfriend and I are going to do so and so this weekend,” and now I have to replace that word with fiancé. Or during introductions—I can’t say, “this is my boyfriend Mr. Gloss,” and I avoid the f-bomb like it’s the plague. So, instead I say, “This is… Mr. Gloss,” usually with an awkward pause to replace where I avoided saying ‘my fiance’.
It’s absolutely not a commitment issue, and I am very excited to be able to say ‘My husband’, I just have a huge problem saying fiancé.
Has this happened to anyone else?
It’s a weird hoity toity word isn’t it? Boyfriend sounds childish, fiance sounds pretentious, husband sounds ok! I called him “my lover” for a bit, it was pretty funny to see reactions!
haha.. i thought i was the only one! i too struggle with saying the f-word and just say his name whenever i can. 
Haha, yes, I feel pretentious or something… you’re not alone!
I feel pretentious using that word too. I mostly call him by his name.
I totally agree! I think it sounds pretentious too I still use it sometimes, because it’s so efficient…and well, because he is after all…my fiance! But, I usually say “husband to be”. Thanks for this post! I thought I was only one who felt funny about the word!
Umm…I guess I’m the oddball out - I LOVE saying “My fiance”!
I totally agree and am so glad I’m not the only one who feels this way!!
I totally feel your pain, and until reading this post, I had not linked “pretentious” to my uneasiness, but that’s EXACTLY it!
My FI told me that he felt prententious using “girlfriend” because he’s “older” (33…aka…not old). lol
Same for me! I hate the f word…for whatever reason, I feel like it makes me sound snobby. I was fine with boyfriend, I’ll be excited with husband…but fiance…ergh.
I, too, find it awkward to use “fiance.” But, my “fiance” will remind me when I call him my bf that he is actually my “fiance.” I agree that it’s a bit pretentious and perhaps it sounds too feminine for a guy.
I have the same issue… it just sounds weird. I still call him my boyfriend. You should start calling him your betrothed. 
“Oh, this is my betrothed, Mr. Gloss.” I doubt it would solve your problem, but wow, that would be a crack-up.
YES! We tried to think of a different word. We thought of hatbox and birdcage but those didn’t work either. I actually just started calling him my husband. I know it’s cheating but we LOVE it. He’s saving wife for after the big day.
I am 100% with you!!! I hate the word fiance. When we first were engaged I said “boyfriend” to one of my bridesmaids and she said “You mean you fiaaaaaaaance” (jokingly!) and from that point on I could never say it! I also, cannot wait to be able to say my husband, it just seems so much more natural.
YES! i just feel awkward with it and so usually just use boyfriend
YES! I am so glad I’m not the only one who feels like this — I get teased all the time bc I almost never refer to him with the word “fiance.” It totally does sound pretentious to me. We jokingly say pre-wife and pre-husband instead
YES! Me! I totally feel pretentious saying it, I don’t know why!
LOL, I have the SAME problem! So instead, we call each other “financiers..” I think it’s from the movie Young Frankenstein??
Anyone remember the Seinfeld episode where Eliane goes to a party and this woman keeps saying “where is my fiaaaaaanceeeee? I just can’t find my fiaaaaaannnceee!” It does sound so pretentious and funny!
THANK YOU!!! I hate saying the word fiance!! It is very awkward and we speak more in spanish so we don’t use that word very often so it is just weird!! Glad to know I am not alone on this
If it makes you feel better, even though we’ve been married over a month, I just referred to my husband as my boyfried! Whoops - he just laughed. I wasn’t good at saying fiance (I would still say boyfriend in the types of situations you mentioned) and apparently I need to work on saying husband as well!
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Mrs. Gloss, Boston/Maine Age and Occupation: 24, Designer/soon-to-be Architect Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Systems Engineer Engagement Date: May 23, 2008 Wedding Date: August 2009 Venue: SS Katahdin/Lakeside Tent About Me: I don't like nickels or the skin that forms on pudding when it's in the fridge for too long. I couldn't live without Pantone markers, fountain soda (3/4 diet, ¼ regular Coke), run-on sentences, or ridiculously oversized sunglasses. I will try to DIY almost anything and am just OCD enough to make most of it work. I am truly excited about having all my family and friends together, becoming Mrs. Gloss, and having amazing photos to prove it!
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