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Mrs. Cub, Chile/Portland Age and Occupation: 26, Astronomer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 28, Astronomer Engagement Date: May 10, 2008 Wedding Date: September 2009 Venue: Westwind YWCA camp About Me: I'm a small-town girl who's making a living in Chile, with her heart in the Pacific Northwest. I grew up in Southern California, went to high school in Texas, grad school in New Mexico, and now I can't wait to settle down in Oregon! I love pears, hazelnuts, knitting, traveling, running, baking, and long talks on the phone with good friends. I'm planning my Oregon coast summer camp wedding while abroad with my best friend - I'm always at home when I'm with him!
About Mrs. Bear Cub

A Dress From My Dreams, Part 3

June 2nd, 2009 @ 9:26 am by Mrs. Bear Cub

By this point in the game I was deep in the hunt - for steals & deals, no less.

Yes, I admit - I’m a designer junkie crammed into an Old Navy wallet. I desperately wanted a $5000 dress on a $1500(ish) budget. I must reference you to my reasonings, though - they’re rock-solid (for this self-manipula-shopper, anyways).

Realistically, though, the strongest reason for letting myself look at designer gowns was this: I was certain I was going to buy a used dress. Why get a new dress I’d feel “OK” in, when a whole new world of dresses popped into my price bracket once I considered used? Buying your wedding dress used is a very significant way to make your wedding more “green”. Think about it - if all women in the US eventually get married (I’m being generous here), if 70% of them buy a new dress (pretty reasonable, considering the likelihood they’ll wear their mom’s wedding dress), how many of these brides do you think sell their dress afterwards? Only as many as will buy - no more than 30% of all brides. That means that integrated over all women getting married in the US, at least 40% of them have their wedding dress in their closet! Or, worse yet, in the dump! What a travesty of accumulated “stuff”.

So I’m just “doing my civic duty” to recycle :). And I’ll recycle my dress again after I’m married (and hopefully recycle some of that emptiness in my wallet!).

The first place I turned to look for things to “recycle” was preownedweddingdresses.com. I must have ogled this dress for months. It was in my price range, already recycled once, and best yet - in Portland! Unfortunately, it had already sold :(.

Personally, I thought this girl looked better in this dress than the POB model!

Mr. Cubbie - this is where you leave.


All the other gowns I found in this style were out of my price range (even used!), so I decided it was a good time to look elsewhere. At this point, Weddingbee proved to be a great resource for finding a dress. Mrs. Peppermint has great style - I loved seeing all the inspirational lacey dresses (Lhuillier included) she was looking at. Mrs. Gummi Bear was just finishing her re-caps of her October 2007 wedding, and her dress was stunning. She wore the well-loved Scarlet. My favorite part about this dress was that it hugged all the right curves (badunk & boob), and showed off all the best womanly shapes (killer arms). I really hated all that bone stuff in the bodices of the David’s Bridal dresses, so the sight of this lace dress was a dream.

By this point I was pretty set on what I wanted - either the POB 2902 or a lacey Lhuillier-like number.

I stalked preownedweddingdresses.com, oncewed, and eBay religiously for months! If you’re looking to snag an incredible bargain on a wedding dress online, Mrs. Haute Cocoa has an incredible manual. Mrs. Tulip also has an excellent guide to buying your wedding dress on eBay. No use re-inventing the wheel here, eh? ;)

Just in case my lacey Lhuillier or POB 2902 didn’t come up for a steal on any of these sites, I looked a bit into some other similar designers.

Have you heard of Cymbeline Paris? This Lhuillier-like dress is amazing!

Cymbeline USA - Agadir

“Agadir”

Unfortunately, there were two problems getting in the way of me and Cymbeline. There are very few bridal salons in the states that sell this designer, which means that there were very few (next to none) used dresses to be found online. Also, like I said, I’m a little …voluminous… for my height (5’2″), and halter tops don’t feel good on the neck when they’re actually expected to provide support.

Another European designer I happened upon was Charlotte Balbier (what’s my issue with wanting things that are hard to get??).

Charlotte Balbier - Tabitha

Charlotte’s a relatively new designer in the UK, and although her dress Tabitha was almost exactly what I was looking for, I couldn’t justify buying a new dress (for my wallet and the planet).

I was emailing people on Craigslist, preownedweddingdress.com, oncewed, partypop - you name it. And then a pristine lacey Lhuillier came on eBay for $50.

I know what you’re thinking - Miss Bear Cub! Things like this always get bid up at the last minute!

I know, I know. I waited, and I watched. I also emailed the seller. If you’re serious about buying a wedding dress on eBay, always email the seller way in advance of the auction closing. Your best bet is to buy from a real person, especially a bride who’s selling her dress directly. I don’t buy expensive things on eBay unless I’m certain the other party is for real.

The seller was very nice, and answered all the questions I had (I made sure to inform her I was serious about potentially buying her dress). I asked her if it was a real Monique Lhuillier. A lot of people try to sell copies of designer gowns on eBay. While there’s nothing inherently wrong with that, I was in it for the real deal. I also asked her for more photos of her dress (from different angles, highlighting different things), how long she wore it (6 hours, and inside!), how dirty it was, and if it needed repair/cleaning (it was pristine), what kind of bustle she had, how tall she was, her other measurements, whether it had been altered (and for how much), and most important - if, after the alterations, there was still enough fabric in the seams to potentially alter it some more. This is crucial. I knew I’d have to get my wedding dress altered anyways (who doesn’t have to?), and without trying this internet-buy on in person, I’d have to be absolutely certain the dress had some give.

She sent more detailed pics of the dress, so I’ll share those with you. The dress I was silently hunting on eBay was the Monique Lhuillier Miranda in ivory.

By this time (6 days into a 7 day auction) the bid was up to $1000. No matter, $1000 is still within range.

The seller had made some alterations, but as it turns out, I probably would have made the same alterations anyways.


The normal Miranda has a plunging neckline. I really don’t feel comfortable when my balcony is on display, so I was really glad that the seller had already altered the front so that the v-neck came together higher on the chest.


She had also added lace cap-sleeves. I liked this, also! I thought the plain straps made the dress feel more casual anyways, plus the cap-sleeves gave a similar appearance to the Scarlet.


This isn’t any particular alteration - isn’t Alencon lace so pretty?


She had the bottom of the dress hemmed, but I’m still a good 4 inches shorter than her, so no biggie.

…and then I waited. I must have hit refresh a bajillion times those last 2 days.

At 5 minutes to go, the dress was up to $1300. Five minutes, and $1300! You never bid at 5 minutes, if you really want it.

At 3 minutes to go, the dress was at about $1400. THREE MINUTES, and $1400!! Don’t bid at 3 minutes.

You bid at 30 seconds if you want to be able to revise your bid (like if some jerk bids after you).

You bid at 15 seconds if you’re ballsy and confident.

I bid at 10 seconds. This was the only bid I placed on this dress. I figured, what the heck? If I get this dress now, I know I’ll like it, it’s in my price range, and I can always re-sell it later if things don’t pan out. I really didn’t expect to win.

I won.

I couldn’t believe it! This was June, and I already had my dress! Mr. Cubbie was sitting on the other couch in the room, and when I won he started a jumping-for-joy celebration with me!

I had my dress!!

I got it in the mail (safely!) a week later, and it fit. It really only needed a few minor alterations (like height, obviously), but for the most part, my dream dress was a dream to buy.


(Click the photos to enlarge - sneaky eyes might want to know!)


(Nevermind all those sciency & Frenchy books, btw! ;) )

I wasn’t quite done yet, though - I still hadn’t tried on the POB 2902, and I had the perfect opportunity the following week to try it on at the Denver POB!

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47 Responses to “A Dress From My Dreams, Part 3”

1.
august15bride
Hostess
august15bride (message)  1,371 posts, Bumble bee

Oh it is beautiful. Absolutely lovely.

 
2.
Miss Mary Jane
Bee
Miss Mary Jane (message)  1,505 posts, Bumble bee

Miss Bear Cub! You look stunning in it! What an amazing deal you got…. and it looks amazing! I love eBay when things work out like that! :)

 
3.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Bruschetta (message)  5,553 posts, Bee Keeper

Wow, that dress is stunning! I LOVE the plunging back on you — congrats on the win! :-)

 
4.
Miss Gloss
Bee
Miss Gloss (message)  1,019 posts, Bumble bee

Woohoo! Love it!!

 
5.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Quiche (message)  2,131 posts, Buzzing bee

Looooove it.

 
6.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Quiche (message)  2,131 posts, Buzzing bee

p.s. 501 French Verbs was my bible for 7 years! :)

 
7.
Member Icon
Member
Perk (message)  125 posts, Blushing bee

OMG! I love your dress- it’s stunning!

I too understand the desire for a designer dress for an budget bride. I bought mine at the Kleinfeld’s sample sale in NYC. An $8500 dress- I paid just under $1500 (with a little negotiations since they don’t include alterations). The waiting and scouring was totally worth it.

Your dress is stunning- and you look incredible in it. Congrats!

 
8.
Guest Icon
Guest
PlanningMyPurpleWedding

OMG!!! You look amazing in it!

 
9.
Guest Icon
Guest
liz

oh oh, it’s gorgeous and it looks amazing on you! it fits like it was made just for you. yay! :D

 
10.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Beagle (message)  1,021 posts, Bumble bee

Ooooh, I love it! I like the cap sleeves… good choice. :)

 
11.
AbbyM
Member
AbbyM (message)  243 posts, Helper bee

A beautiful dress! You look amazing in it!

 
12.
Guest Icon
Guest
ColorCoated

Wow! That dress is beautiful!
Also, great idea buying the dress pre-owned! It’s soooo pretty!

 
13.
Member Icon
Member
chiBride2Be (message)  13 posts, Newbee

aw. its fabulous! and it looks fantastic on you.

 
14.
Mojito
Member
Mojito (message)  269 posts, Helper bee

Miss Bear Cub, that dress was made for you. Gorgeous!

 
15.
Guest Icon
Guest
Melizza

Well done! It looks perfect on you! Congrats!

 
16.
Hayley
Member
Hayley (message)  214 posts, Helper bee

it looks AMAZING on you!! definitely meant to be yours!

 
17.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Hot Cocoa (message)  1,685 posts, Bumble bee

If I were there, I’d jump up and down with you guys! Not only is that dress just perfect for you, you got it for a steal!!!

 
18.
Golden139
Member
Golden139 (message)  337 posts, Helper bee

You look gorgeous! What a beautiful dress. It looks like it was made just for you.

 
19.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Cowboy Boot (message)  227 posts, Helper bee

Che bellissima. You look gorgeous!!

 
20.
Member Icon
Member
CHK (message)  379 posts, Helper bee

Wow!!! that is a fabulous dress and your look fantastic in it!!! I’m so excited for you!

 
21.
Catherine
Member
Catherine (message)  79 posts, Worker bee

That dress looks totally fab on you! I am impressed at your mad Ebay skills!

 
22.
Miss Grizzly Bear
Member
Miss Grizzly Bear (message)  42 posts, Newbee

congrats! it is so stunning!

 
23.
Guest Icon
Guest
martha

you look absolutely gorgeous in that dress!

If you end up not keeping it, or selling it after your wedding I will buy it for whatever your asking price!

mk.schumann@gmail.com

 
24.
marigold
Member
marigold (message)  2,227 posts, Buzzing bee

That dress is gorgeous! I’ve always avoided ML (I have no idea why) but now I might have to be on the hunt for the same dress… I think I tried off a David’s knock-off without realizing it.

 
25.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Peep Toe (message)  1,610 posts, Bumble bee

I heart that dress!! It is stunning!!!

 
26.
Guest Icon
Guest
Kristyn

Yowza. You look like perfection — Mr. Bear Cub will be panting when he sees you!

 
27.
Miss French Bulldog
Bee
Miss French Bulldog (message)  5,956 posts, Bee Keeper

That dress is stunning and you look GORGEOUS in it!
Love you use of Balcony by the way ;-)

 
28.
Mrs. DG
Hostess
Mrs. DG (message)  3,986 posts, Honey bee

I was just going to comment that the two books that jumped out at me were Physics and Mars :)

And I was going to comment that your dress is gorgeous and I admire your fortitude and discipline in getting it!

 
29.
Mrs. DG
Hostess
Mrs. DG (message)  3,986 posts, Honey bee

PS-I’m assuming we are going to get an undergarments post from you sometime soon ;) (built in bra vs long line vs other option?)

 
30.
Miss Bear Cub
Bee
Miss Bear Cub (message)  1,321 posts, Bumble bee

@doctorgirl: teehee, you guys want to know all my secrets ;)

 
31.
Miss Bear Cub
Bee
Miss Bear Cub (message)  1,321 posts, Bumble bee

thanks for all the wonderful comments!
I can’t wait to see my dress again in september - we’re in a long distance relationship right now.

 
32.
vistagirl
Member
vistagirl (message)  784 posts, Busy bee

I LOVE your dress. BTW that is exactly what my bookshelf looks like- science french and Harry Potter :)

 
33.
MrsSl82be
Member
MrsSl82be (message)  1,435 posts, Bumble bee

Totally awesome, I love ebay and I bid the same way!!!

The dress looks gorg on you btw :)

 
34.
emagnus10
Member
emagnus10 (message)  69 posts, Worker bee

The dress looks amazing on you! Too perfect.

 
35.
panda in England
Member
panda in England (message)  73 posts, Worker bee

more Brides should try non-strapless dresses, you look amazing!

 
36.
Member Icon
Member
walkunafraid (message)  22 posts, Newbee

The dress looks great on you! By the way, I’m excited to see you post the Cymbeline. That’s the dress I ordered, and you definitely don’t see many of them around!

 
37.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Labrador (message)  1,315 posts, Bumble bee

OMG! It’s absolutely beautiful! Like so beautiful that I almost doubted my choice of dress! haha And the Ebay story is one for the ages! Isn’t it great that we have Ebay in our day and age? Could you imagine our grandmas buying their gowns through an internet site? lol Btw, I’m getting my gown from Ebay too, but it’s an “inspired by” version of a designer. I would only buy a real one the way you did by finding out if the person was real. But since I’m getting mine so cheap, I was just glad that they admitted it was inspired by and didn’t try to pass it off as the real thing AND that they had a great return policy PLUS the backing of Ebay & Paypal policies! Good job on your find!

 
38.
MaPo
Member
MaPo (message)  310 posts, Helper bee

What a story! I’m so glad you ended up with something you love.

 
39.
azula
Member
azula (message)  161 posts, Blushing bee

Miss Bear Cub, that dress is amazingly GORGEOUS! Oh how I love lace. I originally wanted to buy a lace-all-over dress but my skin was having some kind of allergic reaction to lace on the neckline/bustline :(

Also, giggles at BOB on your bookshelf (Carroll & Ostlie, a.k.a. Big Orange Book, “BOB”) :D

 
40.
Miss Bear Cub
Bee
Miss Bear Cub (message)  1,321 posts, Bumble bee

@Miss Labrador: hell ya, ebay! :)
@azula: that’s too bad you were allergic to the lace! Do you know what kind it was - what material it was made out of? Maybe it was polyester, or it was treated with something. btw, the bookshelf on the other wall has our second copy of BOB ;)

 
41.
azula
Member
azula (message)  161 posts, Blushing bee

@Miss Bear Cub: I tried on around 15-20 lace-all-over dresses, but I’m not sure what material the lace on them was. On some the lace was rough and itchy (those were the ones that elicited the worst reaction in my skin), on others the lace was kinda soft but still itchy, and there was one and only one (Pronovias Gavina, if I remember correctly) that had soft and smooth lace just like I wanted it in the first place, and it *still* made my skin red :(

And yay to two BOBs! We have two BOBs too, one at home and the other one at work. We alternate custody of that one between offices whenever it’s needed :P

 
42.
Cole B
Member
Cole B (message)  448 posts, Helper bee

You look absolutely gorgeous in that dress, I love love love the lace and the back.

 
43.
WorstTwinEver15
Member
WorstTwinEver15 (message)  737 posts, Busy bee

Very pretty!

 
44.
Member Icon
Member
infamia (message)  150 posts, Blushing bee

Gorgeous! Congrats on a great find!

 
45.
lreighard1
Member
lreighard1 (message)  643 posts, Busy bee

OMG I FINALLY wa able to read all about your dress from start to finish! I’m so glad I did! Congrats on your find! You look amazing!

 
46.
Guest Icon
Guest
kbok

so pretty!!! this dress looks fabulous on you. it looks very elegant and romantic. great find! =D

 
47.
Guest Icon
Guest
charia

What a beautiful dress! I have a similar story and a similiar dress- it is a tara keely, alcenon lace, trumpet shape with a v-neck. I got mine on partypop for $125, when the dress was originally $2500. I was worried it wasn’t for real, but it was! I did have to get some major alterations which bumps the price up to $325. But still.

 


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Mrs. Bear Cub Mrs. Cub, Chile/Portland Age and Occupation: 26, Astronomer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 28, Astronomer Engagement Date: May 10, 2008 Wedding Date: September 2009 Venue: Westwind YWCA camp About Me: I'm a small-town girl who's making a living in Chile, with her heart in the Pacific Northwest. I grew up in Southern California, went to high school in Texas, grad school in New Mexico, and now I can't wait to settle down in Oregon! I love pears, hazelnuts, knitting, traveling, running, baking, and long talks on the phone with good friends. I'm planning my Oregon coast summer camp wedding while abroad with my best friend - I'm always at home when I'm with him!
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