Wedding Blog
A few weekends ago we officially started our registry process. I say started, because it seems like we have been continually adding, editing and changing our minds on different items. We originally planned on getting all 4 stores completely done in a weekend, and that definitely did not happen. All the choices are almost overwhelming. We decided to register at Macy’s, Crate and Barrel, Pottery Barn, and Bed, Bath and Beyond.
Our first store was Macy’s, and we headed straight for the item we have been coveting since we were engaged. The KitchenAid Mixer! We registered for a beautiful silver one that will match everything. I am already crossing my fingers that someone gets us this guy for one of my showers. Is that bad? My roommate in college had one, and I’ve been dying to get my own ever since I moved out.
Here is a picture Mr. Ducky took of me at Macy’s. Excuse the poor picture quality, but it’s the only documentation I have from the marathon registry day.
Now, here’s our dilemma regarding registering.
Mr. Ducky and I are a young couple and with my chosen career path and recent grad school expenses, home furnishings have not been very high on the priority list. Basically, when it comes to our registry process, we need everything, since we are starting from scratch. We’ve registered for all our essentials like kitchen supplies, dinnerware, bedding, and bathroom stuff. Now I am seeing all the beautiful decorative touches at Pottery Barn and am drooling over the possibilities to make our first place a “home”. We worry that if we put these items on the registry that we might not get our essential items like plates. Do we wait and see what people buy us, and then add the other stuff at the last minute? Or do we just go for it all and see what we end up with?
Source We didn’t register for these plates, but aren’t they so cute!
Another issue we have run into is things going on sale. Now this, on one hand is a good thing, because it makes some things more affordable, like our kitchen electronics. Bsome stores have sold out of sale items we registered for and they are no longer available, such as a beautiful rug I was in love with from Pottery Barn. It was another one of those non-essential items that I loved. I took it as a sign that I shouldn’t have had it, anyways. We’ve had to go in and replace several items at a few stores. Currently, I’m looking for some new glasses at Crate and Barrel. We tried to register for items that weren’t seasonal or going to go on sale, but we are still getting caught by a few items. We’ve just learned to check the different products frequently and make sure that everything is still available so we don’t get half sets.
Overall it has been so much fun registering and getting excited about the next chapter in our lives together. Suddenly, I can’t have flowery bedding anymore (hello stripes) and we are learning what our style is together. We are already looking forward to cooking some delicious meals with all our fun kitchen supplies. Mr. Ducky even started growing vegetables in pods that we will be able to transplant into our garden. I have a black thumb, so I just encourage him.
Is anyone else worried about not getting your “essentials”? Is there some sort of registering strategy that I should know about? What has been your favorite thing you’ve registered for so far?
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We discussed a registry “strategy,” but in the end, just put everything on the registry. We are, though, “talking up” some of the items about which we’re most excited. (For me, it’s the Kitchen Aid mixer, and for both of us, our cookware and knives!) Nothing wrong with letting your bridal party know which items you’d be thrilled to receive, right?
We had that same problem - things would quickly sell out online and we would have to start the whole process over again (”do you like these bed linens?”). I say, put the essentials that you really want on the registry now. When it gets closer to the wedding, you will see what you get.
That is the exact reason we did not register for everyday dinnerware. I was worried we’d end up with 2 plates, 3 bowls, and 1 coffee mug and have to buy the rest. It turned out we got enough in gift cards to buy whatever we needed. So, it’ll all work out in the end 
Yeah, we just ended up putting everything on there! I hope that people will gravitate toward the “needs” but I’m looking forward to a few “wants” that we would never have purchased for ourselves.
Think about it this way … you can always return some of the wants for the needs after the wedding. Some people gravitate toward the pretty, frivolous gifts and will buy those things off the registry if you don’t put a few on there — at least, that’s my theory.
We ended up putting everything on the registry, even some small furniture. We figure if we don’t get what we need like plates and silverware, we can return some of the decorative gifts and buy what we need.
Emma! Those dishes are the only thing on our registry that I begged Mr. Y to let me add. The rest I could care less about! :o)
We’ve run into the problem of items going on sale, too. Come to think of it, we may need to add a few last minute items.
We just received our silver kitchen aid. She is so sleek and lovely. It is almost a shame to mix in her!
Re: Registry items you need vs. want… When my sister got married, she and her now-husband put all of the items that they really NEEDED on their registry first. Then, as those items began to dwindle, they added the items that they wanted or things that were a bit lower on their priority list. I have to say, it worked out well. They were just starting out, with entry-level salaries, and so this worked out well for getting their home set up! We all love them, of course, so this way we were helping them in the ways they needed most.
@doctorgirl: Yeah for the kitchen aid! What are you making first?
We needed the basics, too! I tried to keep only my “need it” items on the registry for the shower and then after, I added a few “want it” items so people who weren’t family (or not invited to the shower) would have some more gifty items to choose from if they wished to purchase something. It worked out pretty well for us that way. Also, now that we are married, it’s nice to have all of the needs and wants on the registry because we get the discount if we buy items from the list after the wedding.
We also needed EVERYTHING, so I was sure to start out with just the essentials on the registry. I had two large showers, and pretty much after the first one, I had a lot more room to add some non-essentials to the list.
I wish I had done a list of non-essentials earlier, though, as the last shower we had was only about a week before the wedding, and I was scrambling to get more onto the registry before the actual wedding. There were a few things I didn’t even have time to think about; ie: curtains!
We had some serious registry dilemmas before he finally broke down and gave in. We have lived together for over two years and are in our 30s, so we have a lot of ’stuff’. However, we have lots of ‘Ikea stuff’ and ‘Target stuff’. We registered at Macy’s and Williams-Sonoma. I went to culinary school and we both LOVE cooking, so it was really important to us to get things we would LOVE to have, not thing we WANT to have. It took me a while to get my FI to understand that our registry is a “Wish List”, not a “Only Buy From This List”. He was worried about our friends being able to afford what we registered for and wanted to put ‘cheapy’ things on for those people to buy us. Why receive a gift you don’t really really want? After we got past that, our registry grew- and HE was the one making it grow!
Our biggest dilemma was pots and pans. We registered for two copmplete sets, and for the individual pans themselves (per direction of the store ‘expert’. Hopefully, it all works out and we get things we totally LOVE!
We ended up just putting EVERYTHING on our wedding registry, even TVs and video games that we don’t completely expect people to buy–we’re looking forward to the discount we’ll get on the items people don’t buy from our registry!
I was also very pleasantly surprised to receive some high priced items that I didnt think people would be able to afford! (my apple green Kitchenaid!) So you really never know.
We had a hard time because we’ve been together for 7 years and have lived together for 4. BUT– most of the items we already have I had bought back in college, so it’s time for new anyway. We actually got rid of our Pottery Barn registry because it was too hard to deal with because of sales and discontinued items… then you could only add certain things online (which is difficult when you live 3+ hours from a mall!) We are now at Macy’s, Crate & Barrel and Dillards (because my mom works for their corporate office and can get a discount.)
Yes we’re worried about essentials, mostly because we have two place settings of our everyday, and we’re two weeks out. however, I think it’s a great idea to register for lots and lots of thing (in various price ranges, of course) because you can return the more un-needed gifts for things you find out you need along the way.
I love the KitchenAid mixer! They are so wonderful! I have a red one and it’s lasted forever! Silver is a great idea, that way it will match everything! The pale yellow plates are great too! Crate & Barrel is so nice to register at…their merchandise isn’t too expensive, right in a good price range for everyone! Congratulations!
@Miss Snapdragon: I miss seeing you around here more often, Miss Snapdragon!
first - you’re right. those plates are so cute! I want them!
second - I’d register only for the things you need (ie, the expensive things). money is money, and if people buy you a gift, at least it will be something that you need. you can always buy the home-making things later!
I am totally in the same situation. I didn’t register for any decorative items (even though I want those, too!) yet because I am trying to get the essentials first… if it looks like people are actually buying off the registry, I will add those later.
I am dealing with the problem by registering at fewer stores (just Macy’s and Crate & Barrel) with good return policies and completer discounts so that if I get a half-set of my fine china at Macy’s, I can just return them and buy my much-needed cookware instead. I thought about adding a third registry, but I wanted to make exchanges of non-essentials for essentials easier for myself so I stuck with two.
Oh, registry! How you’ve caused me such grief. Maybe a little melodramatic, but this registry business is hard work.
I know I’m probably overthinking this, but the plan for setting up our registry over the next few months is to add only the things we REALLY REALLY want at first, but keep a running list (probably either in a Google doc or maybe a new delicious account) of things to add as the list gets cleared out. Especially the basic stuff that will be easy to add without much thought, such as towels.
This is the PLAN, but the reality is I’ll probably end up dumping everything but the kitchen sink on the list and hoping for the best.
@Miss Yorkie: We got the Emma (in Ivory) dishes as an engagement gift! I love them and can’t wait to start using them when we move in together!
We haven’t started adding anything to our registry yet, but when we do, I imagine that there will be some “want” items on it!
As a veteran, I’d recommend only registering for what you “need” if that’s what you’d prefer people buy first. A lot of people prefer to buy “prettier” or more decorative things (e.g., vases, china, silver) rather than home essentials (e.g., pots and pans, vacuum, towels). I think the thought is that the former will likely be around longer and more of a foundation of your household, rather than an item that will be replaced in 10 years or so.
@Melissa: that’s a generous thought ;). When I buy “prettier” things for people, I’m not thinking into the future so much as I’m thinking it’s just more fun to give! Which is why I’m not giving people the option for mine! 
I viote for registering for essentials and using cash gifts for non-essentials.
The KitchenAid Mixer is just a just have! It’s so fun. I went for the sassy classic red one!!! I am dying for the pasta attachment so I can make my own homeade pasta!!!
I would go with the needs first and wants later. My shower was really early for my September wedding because of crazy schedules for my BMs who have four other weddings than my own in the next few months. I put everything I wanted on there and now I wish I had first gone with what I needed and added more later. I went home from my shower with every decorative piece the Emma line at PB offers but no plates. I have tons of decorative items but I didn’t get the iron I desperately needed or more than one pot. It seemed people wanted to buy the pretty stuff first or what they liked the most off my registry. I think people would much rather buy me a Lenox pitcher than the stainless steal trashcan I really need
Haha….like you the one thing I REALLY want is the Kitchenaid mixer. A little pricey I know, but one can hope.
I don’t know if anyone has mentioned this but I know Bed Bath and Beyond for one will give you a discount on items not purchased on your registry. Maybe you can use some of the cash you get for some necessities you don’t get?
We’re also worried about not getting our essentials, like say our flatware :-/ That is still sitting on our registry unpurchased. I just keep telling myself the wedding is in 2.5 months and if we don’t get it we can still return stuff and get the flatware or buy it w/ any money we’re given. I hope I hope!
Hi Miss Duckling! As a newlywed and a fledgling registry blogger, I think it’s best to register in two “phases,” if you will.
First, register for your essentials, and then gauge where you are at after your bridal shower and/or any early engagement gifts. Then, you can register for more accessories and little luxuries in a “registry refresher” closer to your wedding!
I also have two other small thoughts:
1) I wouldn’t think of your first set of registry items as boring just because they are nesting necessities. There are so many gorgeous products out there that are also justifiable and practical purchases!
2) Even if you do register for some of the more mundane items that just aren’t meant to be fancy or cute, you will still likely receive some pretty off-the-registry gifts to delight in at your shower! Friends and relatives always seem to enjoy adding a set of cute dishtowels or measuring spoons to bridal shower gifts, so you will still get to have some fun early on!
Hope this helps
@MaPo: OMG, I can’t wait to pick up the pasta attachment!
Kitchen Aid mixers are Great! With a variety of color options, you can find one to match any kitchen!!!
Yay for the mixers, we have the same one you registered for! As for needs vs. wants on the registry, we put everything we wanted, but like you had to check often just in case things became out of stock. We chose to register at places that had great return policies and then left it up to people to get us what they wanted. It seemed like people picked things we needed for the most part and we got a couple of want items, which was fun. But, it was nice having the great return policies so if we got a rug, but no dinnerware, we could exchange one for the other…just a thought!
I know that feeling — the glasses we love at Crate and Barrel are being discontinued!! And Macy’s is so confusing because their regular prices are outrageous compared to their sale prices - plus their online prices are different from their in-store prices. It is driving me crazy!!
But yes, we’re registering first for our essentials, and then if we notice that things are getting snatched up and there is room for more items on the registry, we will add it. We’re putting furniture on last. There’s one piece that we desperately want, but we’re waiting until the week before our wedding b/c really who is going to buy us a $1000 bar cabinet?
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Mrs. Duckling, San Diego
Age and Occupation: 23, Psychology Grad Student, Youth Diversion Specialist/Marriage and Family Therapy Trainee and an Executive Assistant
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Marketing and PR Coordinator
Engagement Date: May 17, 2008
Wedding Date: September 2009
Venue: Rancho Bernardo Inn
About Me: I'm currently living in Orange County, but planning our wedding in my hometown of San Diego. We are a DIY wedding "2fer", as I'm the crafty one and Mr. Ducky is in charge of all of our graphic design and technical aspects. When not wedding planning or reading wedding blogs, I'm attending grad school and rotating between two different jobs to keep things exciting. My favorite things include shoes, Post-Its, Labrador Retrievers, traveling, psychology, delicious food, photography, reading, craft gadgets/supplies, and of course, my wonderful Mr. Ducky!
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