Wedding Blog
With an average gestation period of eight months, couples have a lot of time to think about their wedding date - a lot of time to sear it into their minds. That date (that number on a calendar) will forever signify their promise of love. It’s not surprising, then, when brides try to find the “best” date to save.
My personal favorite I’ve seen recently is 10-10-10 (October 10, 2010). 101010 is binary for 42, and if you’re familiar with the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, you’ll know that 42 is the answer. The answer to what? In this case, the answer to love - any couple who gets married on 10-10-10 can rightly claim that their wedding date was the answer to love.
For other couples it might be something more mathematically simple - the anniversary of a grandparents’ wedding, a first date, a first kiss; that sort of thing. At some point, we (as brides) kind of have to let go of the power of choosing a date. The church might be booked on that date for the next 3 years! The perfect reception hall might already be booked when you already have the perfect church date!
Then you’re not so much choosing your date, as your date is choosing you.
That perfect venue is available only one weekend this year? And it’s in February? We’ll take it! This is often what a lot of couples have to deal with when choosing a wedding date. We certainly determined our date based on the availability of the space!
Even if our wedding date doesn’t coincide with an ancestral anniversary, it is still meaningful.
Our wedding date does coincide with a celestial anniversary - an anniversary of equality. Unfortunately, that day is a Tuesday this year.
You might be thinking, “OMG - WTF Miss Bear Cub… a TUESDAY wedding?? Are you MAD??”
Well, I’m not mad, but I’m definitely conflicted.
I’ve let you in on the little secret that Mr. Cubbie and I are full-time astronomers. That’s the reason why we’re in Chile - we do research funded by the National Science Foundation on objects that can only be studied from the southern hemisphere.
little dude can’t see everything - only what’s above his horizon!
When we were picking our wedding date, we had a choice between mid March and mid September (summer camps are chock-full-o-kids in the summer!). September in Oregon is way more likely to be sunny than March, so that was easy. Within September, we were able to choose our wedding date - we wanted the weekend of the autumnal equinox.
Really quickly, remember our venue? Since we live a hemisphere away from our family and friends, we wanted to spend the entire [long] weekend with them - three full days of fun at a summer camp! For this reason, our wedding is really more of a domestic destination wedding. The idea isn’t for people to be able to drive in for the afternoon - it’s to spend several days together.
The autumnal equinox, however, lands on a Tuesday (September 22) this year. Did you know it’s a different date every year? It oscillates between September 21, 22, 23, and sometimes 24! Seeing as how our wedding “date” - the equinox - changes every year anyways, we figured it wouldn’t be a big deal if this year it was the 21st instead of the “real” equinox, on the 22. Some years it’ll be on the 21st!
Imagine you’re looking at this from above. This is another good resource if you’re interested.
September 21st is a Monday. This isn’t as bad as a Tuesday, but it’s still a Monday - a 3-day weekend ending on Monday. For some reason it seems like people are generally more willing to take a Friday off from work than a Monday, even though the hours lost is the same.
While you’re silently gawking at how I’m forcing my 80-so-odd guests to miss work for my Monday nuptials, hear me out a bit. The symbolism of an equinox wedding is, to me, awesome.
We were all set to send out our save-the-dates as September 21st, when I panicked. What if, out of 150 invited, only 20 show up?? What if everyone hates me for insisting on having a Monday wedding? I couldn’t bear the thought of traveling all the way from South America, to be surrounded by a whopping 5% of my friends and family on my wedding day. I tend to take things rather personally, and this lack of support on such an important occasion would devastate me.
I called our site coordinator, and changed our date to September 20 - Sunday. We felt that could be a decent compromise - it’s still the weekend, and almost the equinox.
I understand having your wedding on any day that’s NOT Saturday is rather controversial. But given the significance of our equinox wedding date, would you really be so upset to go to a domestic destination wedding on a Sunday? Can we still call our wedding an “equinox” wedding even though it’s the weekend before the actual equinox? Have you had any positive experiences with non-Saturday weddings?
Is your wedding date imbued with special significance? How did you choose your wedding date - or did it choose you?
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Honestly, we just picked the date. It is not a special date for us. My FI just wanted to get married in September because it isn’t too hot and I wanted a wedding later in the year. So it worked out for the both of us. We did find out later though that it is his grandmother and her husband’s wedding anniversary as well.
We’re getting married on a Sunday too—although it’s the Sunday of a long weekend, Labor Day weekend. I have to say, there are some up sides of having it on a weird day… I have a large extended family that I’m not particularly close to, but feel obligated to invite. When my sister got married (on a WEDNESDAY!), only one out of 40+ of them came. But everyone was happy—she didn’t have to take on the cost of the added people, but also she didn’t have to upset anyone by refusing to invite them.
Wonderful meaning behind your wedding! Mine was a Sunday and the turnout was just what I expected. I’m invited to a Monday evening wedding in August and don’t think I can make the trip.
Our date was actually our second pick — the week BEFORE the one we originally wanted — which we shifted to ensure it fit our celebrant’s schedule. But there’s a fun repetitiveness to the numbers, and just a few weeks into planning, it totally already felt like “ours.”
I love that you’re getting married on a Sunday. It’s really kind of you to be so concerned with your guests needs and wants as well 
I think I commented when you posted this on your blog, but I just can’t resist: YAY FOR 10-10-10! Only sixteen more months!
I love the significance of your near-wedding date! I think you’re close enough
Our wedding is on a Sunday, too, because of the logistics of our venue! But more on that later…
I’m also an astronomer (just got my PhD!), and I think it’s *awesome* that you’re setting your wedding to coincide w/ the equinox (even if it’s only *almost* the equinox). Sadly our wedding will not coincide with any astronomical milestone. We are trying to coordinate with another friend, who will probably get married the weekend after us, and really we’ll take any summer weekend when our venue is free.
My date picked us. We wanted a certain venue, not much choice in small town West Virginia. I thought not many weddings in small town WV. Wrong my hometown is somewhat of a destination wedding mecca. We really didn’t want an engagement that was longer than a year so when we got engaged in November of 2008 we were looking at Fall 2009. The only availability was 10/31 or 11/14. Nov 14 is my sister’s birthday and the hotel rooms at my venue were booked that weekend so that left 10/31 as our only choice. Oh well, I’m slowly geting used to it.
We chose it and it chose us. We also wanted an equinox wedding (vernal for us!), but even more important was to us was to be able to take a honeymoon, even if it was short, immediately after the wedding. Conveniently, my spring break from grad school falls the weekend after the equinox, and it is on a Saturday next year, so it was like it was meant to be! 
I really wanted to have a March wedding because, 1. It is both of our birthday months and 2. We met on his birthday. 3. My e-ring is our birthstone. So it would have meant a lot to us. However, as I quickly learned I couldn’t have my wedding on other people’s weddings as we are a large city with small town doings and most guests would be going to both weddings, etc. Then the venue we wanted advised us against doing the end of March because it is spring break and they have lots of tourists in the town and we would have a hard time finding hotel rooms etc. So we said April. The first weekend in April is Easter next year so we went with April 10, 2010. Which to me is pretty cool.. 4-10-10 or as I keep saying “Rin, Tin, Tin!”
I think you’re adorable. I loved this!
I had an idea….what if you got “married” on Sunday, but did not have your license filed until Tuesday. Can that be done? This way you get your “offficial” date on the equinox, but the party will be convenient.
Once we decided that fall was going to drive us both insane with scheduling conflicts we were able to pick whatever spring date we wanted. I was super happy about 05.15.10 because of all the nice round numbers. That date isn’t going to work though because we live close to Virginia Tech and VT’s graduation shuts down every hotel within a two hour drive and makes traffic a nightmare. So we’re going for the next weekend 05.22.10. I guess it kind of picked us and I’m perfectly happy with it!
Our date isn’t nearly as symoblic as yours, but we chose Labor Day weekend because we’ve always hosted a Labor Day barbecue, while various other friends of ours have been respectively assigned Christmas, Thanksgiving, or Fourth of July, etc. We figured that we’d continue our tradition of a Labor Day Weekend party. The final consideration in selecting our date was my brother’s desire to go to a football game. He’s been fanatical about the University of Montana Grizzlies since college, but he hasn’t been in town for a game since he moved six years ago. By having our wedding on Sunday, everyone who wants to can spend the day at the football game on Saturday. My brother is ridiculously excited!
O.M.G. I thought I was the only one. We started off with 5.15.10 as our date since they are all mulitples of 5, I was thrilled!
Then, the venue didn’t work out.
So we changed it to May 22, 2010 (note that I spell it out rather than use the numeric form) which was ok because my favorite number is 2 and 2010 is an even number.
Ok, mine isn’t NEARLY as cute and awesome as yours but it’s something that had to be!
My brother got married on a Tuesday last year because that specific date had extra significance to him and his [now] wife. I was really curious to see what the turnout would be … and it actually wasn’t bad! They were planning on 100, and the final count was 92. I think that people even appreciated the excuse to make a small vacation of it. Of course others couldn’t make it, but that only made it that much more special for those who could! Either way, I think your wedding sounds like an awesome experience for your guests and surely worth missing a monday/tuesday of work for
Miss Bear Cub, I love all of the celestial significance you put into finding your date! Our wedding date is 6-26-2010, so the month & year are kinda fun. And just think of our 16th anniversary: 6-26-26.
I love your rationale Our date chose us. We fell in love with the venue and the only date in 2009 they had available was our date. And there it was set!
I love when people choose a date that has special significance! I took a red eye across the country last year to be in attendance at an 08-08-08 wedding for two of my favorite people. For me though it was a choice more out of necessity as I am working on a Master’s degree currently. Summer was the best choice so I would not have to miss classes. We had our honeymoon trip picked out before we even got engaged and the ship sails on August 8th so we chose our wedding date as the closest day that wasn’t the weekend right before the sailing date, July 25th. Sadly this is the day after my birthday and I will forever have combined anniversary/birthday celebrations. It’s worth it knowing I get to have my fiance for the rest of my life and if he ever forgets he would have to forget both and will be in some serious trouble!
I was married on a Sunday. It worked out very well for us, as we wanted the party to wrap up early. Our guests didn’t mind a bit (or at least no one voice it to me!).
I don’t have a date yet, but my parents’ wedding was on 8/1/81 (or 08/01/1981, but that doesn’t look as cool!). I wish mine could have a nice pattern like that, but unfortunately none of the weekends in the next few years are as cool as that!
I went to a Sunday wedding last night. One word: hangover. Head. Hurts. Ouch. But it sounds like all your guests will have Monday to recuperate, anyway.
We’re getting married on a Monday, because it is the anniversary of our first date and day our venue was free (and said venue has been the site of MANY dates and is also important to us). And I am so over the looks of, “oh, your weddingm is on a MONDAY?!?”. pish. good for you!
we’re getting married on 7-26-09 (if you add 2 +6, our wedding date is 7-8-9) and another cool thing about the date that we just realized is that we’ll both be 26 when we get married! (that should make the date easier to remember…)
Yay I’m a 10.10.10 bride!!! I actually found about the 101010=42/ HGTTG thing on Weddingbee. I’m pretty sure that’s what sold my fiance on the idea
I love love love when dates have a special significance to couples! It just makes the day all-the-more special!
I am getting married on a Sunday too, but it is Martin Luther King Day weekend, so I figured it was as good as a Saturday night wedding. Most guests should have the Monday off from work. I picked Sunday because it is winter so I thought they could drive up either Friday or Saturday, giving them flexibility in case there is a snow storm. I love my number because it the 17th and I have always had a thing for prime numbers!
That is SO COOL that you picked the equinox for your wedding date! 
We originally wanted March 14 for our wedding because it’s Pi Day (3.14, hehe) even though it’s a Sunday next year, but we weren’t able to. We’re getting married at the Arecibo Observatory and they told us that the telescope is in transmit mode during new moon, and Pi Day 2010 falls close to new moon, and they said it would probably be better to avoid transmit mode. So we moved the wedding to a few weeks earlier, to February 27th (a Saturday) which falls almost on full moon. It turned out great too, because we both like the number 27 because it’s a cube. Hehe, we’re dorks 
I like your rationale. We are 10.10.09 so we’ll be celebrating our first anniversary on 10.10.10. We would have liked the 2010 date, but there’s no way we were going to wait a whole other year!
I sometimes wish we were having a Wednesday wedding.
We just went with the first date in our chosen months (june & sept - based on weather) that both the church & reception venue were available. However, turned out great as 9.19.09 has a nice ring to it!
We’re 10-10-10!!!! I’m designing our hitchhiker themed save-the-dates right now!
I’ve been to several fantastic Sunday weddings, because most of my family is Jewish - two during 3 day weekends, the rest just ordinary days. I enjoy Sunday weddings, which is part of the reason we are having ours on a Sunday - and it’s the Sunday of Columbus Day Weekend, so it’s not totally unreasonable since about half our guests will be getting the Monday off. We’re also having it earlier in the day.
We didn’t realize it was 10-10-10 until a vendor pointed it out to us, and we didn’t realize the Hitchhiker’s connection until later, but we are running with it.
We knew we were doing summer and an available date popped up in August. It just so happens that the date is 5 days after my birthday, exactly 5 months until his birthday, and 3 days after our official anniversary. So - we like it!
Oh, I think you would have been fine with a Monday wedding!!
I like september 21, because it’s the sum of our birthdates. I thought April 25 would work as well, as it’s the average, but I think I like 9-21 better.
But I am not engaged, so I can only daydream… >.>
Interesting. I wish we could have gotten one of our “special” dates, but it was not meant to be. We finally picked a Saturday that was NOT ever going to be Father’s Day weekend. It happens to be 3 days after my Dad’s birthday…. but at least it’s not the same day!
I love what you’re doing, it is so special! I think you’re friends and family will feel the same.
Our date was actually our 4th choice! But it ended up being the very best of them all - 20% cheaper for November vs. October… and after we booked we found out it is his Grandparents anniversary - who were madly in love for over 50 years.
ummm….we picked our date around college football. technically….I did because the boy doesn’t care. and so on saturday october 17th, we’ll be surrounded by our family and friends, UGA’s homecoming will be over, and all our other SEC fans don’t have conference games to worry about =)
I’ve been to a Sunday late-afternoon wedding, and aside from it wrapping up earlier than usual (10pm) it was great!
Our date picked us… we really couldn’t care less, decided on a fall wedding and so took the first available Saturday at our venue of choice.
i like your pick. i’m sure your “important” people will go out of their way to make your sunday wedding……..
AND
if you take a honeymoon the week after you can have a honeymoon equinox!!!
I love the signifigance of your wedding date- but honestly I am not a fan of the “non Saturday” wedding date. I’ve been to several weddings that were on other days of the week and I ended up being so stressed out about missing work that I couldn’t enjoy myself. Most specifically, I attended an out of town wedding on a Thursday at 11am. I had to drive the 5+ hours on Wednesday evening and take Thursday and Friday off work and that coupled with the cost the hotel was way way too expensive! It was super stressful and the whole event ended up costing me like 600 dollars (missing work etc). I vowed never to do that to my guests!
As an astronomer and newlywed, I have a few words for you…. I AM JEALOUS!! We picked our venue and there were only 2 weekends left, so our date sorta chose us. BUT - it is the anniversary of Apollo 6 being launched.
My wedding is 10.10.10, and The Hitchiker’s “answer” was exactly what my fiance loves about it too! I posted about this on the boards so I’m being redundant, but it’s so fun! And great that my man is excited about the date! Every other choice was arbitrary. I tried figuring out the best weather in Oct… but in PA it’s always iffy. Turned out our rabbi was already booked for every Sat in Oct 2010 (crazy, right?) so I changed to Sun of Columbus Day weekend, and it happened to be 10.10.10
We have a Friday date and we’ve heard a few grumbles, but we’ve got our standard response of “We really hope that you’ll be able to celebrate with us, but we understand that everyone’s schedule is different and that they may not be able to attend.”
I think its great that you guys are sticking to getting married on an equinox weekend; the people that are most important to you will find a way to be there no matter what!
Honestly, I picked the date out of the air. We both wanted some time in late April or early May. I was originally hoping for May 8, 2010 but then realized that was Mother’s Day weekend and changed the date to May 1, 2010. This day has no significance to either myself, the FI or anyone in our families. Thankfully, our location, photographer and pastor are all available for the 1st!
I have a thing for symmetry AND loved the idea of having our wedding over a holiday weekend. We’re getting married on 09/06/09, which is the Sunday of Labor Day weekend. Can’t wait!
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Mrs. Cub, Chile/Portland
Age and Occupation: 26, Astronomer
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 28, Astronomer
Engagement Date: May 10, 2008
Wedding Date: September 2009
Venue: Westwind YWCA camp
About Me: I'm a small-town girl who's making a living in Chile, with her heart in the Pacific Northwest. I grew up in Southern California, went to high school in Texas, grad school in New Mexico, and now I can't wait to settle down in Oregon! I love pears, hazelnuts,
knitting, traveling, running, baking, and long talks on the phone with
good friends. I'm planning my Oregon coast summer camp wedding while
abroad with my best friend - I'm always at home when I'm with him!
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