Wedding Blog
I went back and forth, back and forth on whether or not we needed a day of coordinator (DOC) for our wedding. I even went so far as to contact some coordinators last year to find out pricing. But then I allowed our budget to rear its ugly head and decided that this was an extra cost we
just couldn’t justify.
Fast forward to this past January. I started to worry more and more about the actual events of the wedding day and who would do what. It was these babies that really started to have me worried:
I was planning to have tealights across all of the tables, which I know is a very common wedding decor item. Other brides probably don’t have mini breakdowns over them. But I seriously just couldn’t fathom who might be lighting all of these candles before the reception started.
My reception site - while fabulous - doesn’t really have someone who I felt would be running around on our behalf to attend to these little details. While our contact there is so great to work with, I don’t really see this as her role. I didn’t really think this was the job of the catering staff, either. Certainly they will have more important things to attend to than running around with a lighter!
I decided enough was enough! A DOC was just what we needed, and the tealights gave me justification, I felt, to hire one. I sent emails out to almost everyone I could track down in the Chicago area (unless they had their prices on their websites and I knew off the bat they were out of our league!).
In the end, we hired Marilyn of Honey Bee Weddings. When we sat down with her, she was so incredibly nice, but we also could tell that Marilyn wasn’t a pushover and that she would make sure our timeline stayed in place and that the day went smoothly. Hiring Marilyn as our DOC is something that I’ve never looked back on with regret, even as money for the wedding gets tight! When I think about my family, Mr. S, and me not having to worry about things running off course/not arriving/not being set up, etc., the peace of mind is worth every penny!
Of course, DOCs aren’t just there to light candles, duh! Who else would be there to stand behind you, making sure your train is laying flat before you walk down the aisle?
And, I don’t know about you, but I want that clock to be a happy fellow on the day of. But I don’t want to even so much as glance at a timeline of the day!
And, of course, there are a million other odds and ends that a DOC can take care of, from making sure you and your bridal party have something to eat while you’re getting ready as well as setting up and breaking down the ceremony decor, to coordinating your rehearsal and making sure your gifts are taken to the car at the end of the night.
Who says you can’t buy peace of mind?
Are you considering/have you hired a DOC? What tasks are you pleased that he/she will be taking care of?
|
Share this post: Why I Chose to Be DOC’d
Oooh good for you! I SOO want want and funny enough the candle thing was what started it for me too. I’m not sure though because they seem to be around $1500 for a DOC in NYC area, thats wwaaay more then I’m willing to spend!
I cannot fathom not having a DOC, for basically the same reasons as you. I don’t want my family or myself to have to stress and constantly check the clock to make sure we’re on schedule. My DOCs so far are great, and I can’t wait to meet with them soon to go over everything. The piece of mind is worth every penny we didn’t spend (found them on Craigslist for free since they’re just starting out)
We do have a DOC and she as been a LIFESAVER thus far. Eeps I cant imagine getting people wrangled together to light candles, handle the vendors, make sure nobody but those allowed on my list get the microphone, straighten my train, make sure the waitstaff brings us hors d’ouvres during our post ceremony photos…(get my drift? 
)
She came along with the venue, however had she not, Id definitely be hiring one
@ lovespearls, try craigslist (search ads and post a wanted ad for one in your price range) I told someone on teh boards earlier that a lot of poeple trying to break into teh business are willing to provide services for much less - especially here in NYC!
@Lovespearls: Have you tried Craigslist?? I was doubtful until reading Miss Joey’s posts on her CL successes, and I was able to find my DOC, caterer and DJ all on CL within my budget. My DOC is free because they are just starting out….you could get lucky
While my venue provides a doc, I’m unsure if they are going to be as involved as someone I hired specifically for that job would be. I’m starting to stress over timeline details, etc.
That is EXACTLY the same reason I want a DOC–candle centerpieces! And placecards!
My venue has a ceremony coordinator, but I think they are more about getting the ceremony started and ended on time, not about making sure I don’t have to deal with other vendors. I really need someone else to get these details taken care of!
@ChiAngie: Fun! I’ve heard raves about Misse and Marilyn, so we’re really looking forward to working with Marilyn. They both have great reviews out there 
Wow, I wonder how many of us hired DOC’s to light our candles! Mine was a similar situation, I was just worried about the initial setup because you don’t think about it… but how does everything get to where it’s supposed to be?! Maybe I’m a stress case, but I’m glad I have someone else I’m paying to be responsible for it.
@abride:
I know! A lot of us don’t have receptions at traditional hotel ballrooms or banquet halls where there is a manager to kind of handle major logistics. Once my venue was set I started to realize that someone had to be in charge of all of those little things…and I’ve seen too many out of control wedding rehearsal on reality tv that I thought it’d be nice to have someone coordinate that too!
I have a good friend who is very OCD, like myself, and she is going to help me out with the final set up of everything. She isn’t in the wedding party but I figured I will give her a gift and have her come to the rehersal dinner as a thank you for helping out.
Angie and Miss Stiletto, Misse from Honey Bee is doing my September wedding also! It is awesome to see other Hive-rs are using the same DOC, how fun :-). I am a Septrmber bride so I haven’t had to enlist Misse’s help too much yet but she seems like a doll and is so knowledgable, I am so happy I decided to hire a DOC
I lucked out in having a venue where the staff took care of everything! I was glad not to have the added expense. However, it would have been nice to have an extra pair of hands and head around here the few weeks leading up to the wedding. My family and friends are lifesavers!
Laurlyn,
We loved her when we met with her so as soon as she left we knew we wanted her.
I have! I asked her to help me proof the invites suggest a florist which I am using! Some other suggestive and emotional support LOL!!! I am getting married August 15th.
Angie
I’m really lucky to have a friend who is starting out in the wedding planning business and she pretty much TOLD me she was my DOC and I said I might feed her (joke)…I can’t imagine doing all those little things AND getting ready without freaking out.
We hired a DOC. We really don’t NEED one, as our wedding is pretty small, but she came highly recommended from my local board on the knot, and she is a gem. I didn’t even bother meeting with anyone else. She has a great personality, has done weddings at my venue and I know she’ll be up to bat for me on wedding day to make sure everything goes smoothly!
@KellyV and MrsSI82be - Thanks! I hadnt thought of it but it defintely cant hurt to look!
Ooh I have the same 1 million candles problem and that’s one of the best reasons for the Coordinator. That and like you I don’t want to worry about the schedule - that’s her job. It’s the one day my entire life that I’m planning on not watching the clock.
I think that was a great choice! I just recently attended a wedding where the caterer was supposed to light the tealights on the tables and forgot, so I ran around doing it for them!
I have been stressing about this lately. After some comments from my mom asking “Who would do that? We can’t be doing everything you know.” I quickly started to freak. My mom and I are handling ALL the details of my wedding. How in the world will everything come together on the day of? I certainly don’t want to be running around and I’d rather my mom not either. I found a lady on CL who says she can be my DOC for $300!!!! I was shocked. That price is for her to be there all day and have an assistant. I hope to meet up with her soon. However when I mentioned it to my mom this morning she gave me a weird look. Le sigh. We shall see what happens.
Having a DOC was one of the best decisions that DH and I made while planning our wedding. It’s totally worth it.
@MyPurpleWedding: I decided to book our DOC and tell my mom about it later. I told her that Mr. S and I wanted to pay for a DOC because we wanted to make sure that SHE was able to enjoy the day and not worry about anything. After I explained everything the DOC would do, she started to ease up, but once I told her she didn’t have to foot the bill, it was smooth sailing from there
@Miss Stiletto: That was a good idea. I made my first mistake by telling her about it as I was walking out the door for work. lol (my bad) She’s not footing the bill though….for anything. In my opinion, it would most likely end up being the best $300 purchase I’d make for the wedding. Hopefully I’ll be able to talk to her about it more tonight and she’ll be more receptive. I even e-mailed the coordinator again this morning and asked what the price would be if we only need her there until about an hour into the reception. She knocked the price down to $200. If she’s as good as she says, I can’t pass that up! Time will tell. She planning the fashion show at the local Premier Bride show on the 9th of August and I hope to attend to see her work and meet her.
You touched on something that people tend to forget about…who is going to take everything down? After all the hard work we brides put into the decor of our weddings and making them unique it is easy to forget that after the wedding, someone has to clean it all up. The DOC means you and your husband AND your family can leave the venue and pick up your things from someone else much later down the line!
I love this post! I am a wedding planner in CT and when we meet with brides who are interested in a DOC, I know they are going to enjoy their day so much more!
I loved your post so much I would like to feature it on our blog tomorrow (with proper credit due, obviously!) Check back tomorrow: Http://www.weddingistas.com
I originally planned to have a DOC, then much like Miss Stiletto I hemmed and hawed due to the cost (downtown Chicago). The FI reminded me that it really isn’t in the budget, and I reluctantly agreed. (He, however, isn’t actually DOING any of the prep work himself! So it’s easy for him to say!)
Then, yesterday, my mom mentioned that she’d need to get to our venue an hour and a half before the wedding to, “you know, set up the centerpieces and such.” AAAHHH! My mom and I are DIYing the centerpieces, and every table will be slightly different. My mom can’t do set up the day of the wedding! That’s crazy talk!
Now to convince the FI of the necessity of a DOC. He genuinely loves my mom, so once I explain she’d have to work that day and change ON-SITE, I bet he’ll be all for it!
Teamzeewagen,
It is a very cost effective thing to have. You can have less stress your mom wants to be with you not setting up certerpieces. I am not sure how big your wedding is but just list all the things that are possible that need setting up. Seating cards, gift table, favors (if exceluded from seating cards) Who will direct everyone where to go, create a timeline for the ceremony , reception set up and teardown. Coordinate all vendors and if someone does not show up who hunts them down?? There are so many things I had not thought of before Misse showed me the list of things she would handle.
Angie
I was very fortunate and had a good friend (who’s helped out at numerous weddings) offer to be my DOC just a few days after I got engaged. She was great in making sure people were at the right place at the right time, and setting up everything. The best thing is that I will get to return the favor this August when she gets married. Very excited!
I know I’m a stress bucket, and I want so much to spend the wedding day stress-free. I knew from the beginning I really wanted a DOC- no need (or desire!) to have anyone else plan the wedding, but to have someone there the day of to make sure people are where they need to be and when they need to be… so fantastic. Also, my fiance was sold when I told him that our DOC will make sure we get to have some of our cocktail hour food! He was really worried about missing out on all the delish noshes while we took photos. His relief was palpable.
We found a great DOC who’s just starting out, so she was very reasonable. I’m so happy we hired her!
Mrs.Corn brings up a fabulous point! My friend actually served as a DOC for my wedding, but did not stay until the end. As a result, my husband and I spent at least an hour at our venue packing up all the decorations and everything else in our wedding finery! Oh well!
Hiring a DOC was the best wedding decision we ever made. She was just getting started, so we got a great deal in an otherwise expensive area (San Francisco). We had a small wedding and did most of the prep ourselves, but it was such a relief to turn it all over and not worry about a thing on the day of the wedding. We ran on time, though not aggressively so and all the details we’d worked so hard to create were executed flawlessly.
If cost is an issue and you can’t find someone in your area, you may want to consider checking your local boards to see if there is another bride in a similar situation - perhaps you could DOC for each other.
Sorry for the delay in response, I was busy lighting candles. LOL.
Thank you for the lovely post. It is always nice to get some recognition.
I did a blog post about your post.
[...] blogging about being blogged! It’s always exciting when a fellow blogger writes about you. Miss Stiletto on Wedding Bee aka Soon to be Koo wrote a lovely post about her reasons for hiring a Day of Coordinator aka a DOC. [...]
We just hired really wonderful vendors who all had an impeccable attention to detail and willingness to go the extra bit and work outside of their designated role. The caterer and his staff handled the candles as if it were part of his job. The DJ found us a knife and plate to cut the cake with the day off (oops), things like that. Our vendors are definitely what made our day so successful, and there isn’t one that I wouldn’t recommend again.
[...] shared a little while back about why we chose to hire a day of coordinator (DOC). I wanted to know that the little details were taken care of, and while I thought our DJ was a [...]
| Visit our sister sites | Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Fertile Thoughts Infertility Support |
Mrs. Stiletto, Chicago
Age and Occupation: 26, Non-Profit/Fundraising
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Engineer and Photographer
Engagement Date: March 2, 2008
Wedding Date: September 2009
Venue: The 19th Century Club
About Me: My fiance and I love living in the city of Chicago with our cats Basil and Linus, and vow to never move to the suburbs if we can possibly avoid it! We’ve poured ourselves into planning a wedding that reflects our personal style - modern and high contrast with a vintage twist. Blogging keeps me creative, baking keeps me happy, and grande nonfat no foam sugar free vanilla lattes keep me sane.
| Sun | Mon | Tue | Wed | Thu | Fri | Sat |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |
| 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 |
| 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 |
| 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 |
| 29 | 30 |
Source
Latest Gallery Pics