Wedding Blog
Mr. S and I really laid a lot of the groundwork for our wedding over the winter. Sure, we booked our reception site last May and our photographer and church last July. But our florist, day of coordinator and limo were booked in the winter, while many planning details and projects were thrown around.
So, on a regular basis we held wedding meetings right here:
At first we tried having wedding meetings at Starbucks. Even though it got Mr. S away from distractions such as his laptop, he still had that pesky iPhone. Which of course meant that getting his attention at home was virtually impossible… I could never get him to focus in on the task at hand. Since I opened Mr. S’s eyes to the wonders of the bubble bath at the beginning of the winter, I knew I had him right where I wanted him!
We’re blessed with a fabulous deep-soaking tub. No, it’s not one of those big fancy corner units with lots of space, but with a little finagling we manage to fit - bubbles and all, and maybe even a glass or two of wine on the side if we’re feeling saucy.
From the very start, Mr. S has been very engaged in the planning process. I’ve done my best to get his input on almost everything, and I even try and listen and understand his feelings when he’s going completely against what I want to hear! I’m very, very blessed that he doesn’t roll his eyes as I show him three different examples of escort cards or when I have him weigh in on which white flower looks the most like “us”.
So, when we held those fabulous meetings in the tub this winter, we were completely free from distractions, inspiration overload, and real life. Instead, we could just pick a topic and plan it out from top to bottom. This was how I found out that he had a great idea for the guest book that he really wanted to do (when previously I thought he didn’t care one way or another). Having that relaxed and focused “us” time really brought us together as we were planning, while also quelling some of my wedding planning stress and frustration!
Now summer is here (although it doesn’t feel that way in Chicago most days) and the baths are over and we’re 70-odd days away from the wedding (eeeh!). While we have our disagreements about the wedding from time to time, I find that they’re more grumbles than all-out fights, and I truly believe it’s because we’ve really invested the time in planning a wedding that reflects both of our wants, wishes and ideas.
How have you and your significant other approached your planning? Where do you find you get the most effective planning done?
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Gawd I wish we had a deep soaker tub. Our bathroom’s barely big enough as it is though, so I don’t see it happening. Mr. MJ and I often talk in the car. Even if we have no place to go, sometimes we’ll just drive around if we want to do some talkin’.
That’s so cute! I wish we could’ve done that, too! Reminds me of the comment in the “wifely advice” thread about arguing naked. : )
We are big fans of “tub time” too! At least once a week. Whether we need it or not. 
So cute! I think we get our most effective wedding deciding done at dinner… there is food, so were both happy
That is an awesome idea! =) I may just have to try something like that with my fiance during the two weeks in August we have all to ourselves! ^.^
I have yet to figure out a good way to get some quality planning time in with my man. He gets distracted SO easily. Even if we are alone at his place with the tv off he still gets distracted by the cat, by me (he can’t keep his paws off me sometimes! 
hehe), by his cell, etc. It drives me batty sometimes. I try really hard to keep our planning talks/sessions down to about 30-45 minutes because his attention span doesn’t last much longer (if even that).
I love baths, but haven’t yet convinced my guy of the wonders of the tub! We get a lot of our good planning done at happy hour. When we are both actually home in the early evening, we head out for a couple of cheap beers and some chatting! I always have scraps of paper and a pen in my purse, so my wedding folder has plenty of notes on the back of receipts.
We have our morning showers together. We don’t cuddle much when sleeping so this takes the place of spooning, I guess.
But I have always done my best thinking in the shower so it works for planning too!
We also commute together (for the next few months at least) so with our morning coffee/diet pepsi in hand, we chat and plan.
That is so sweet! What a fabulous idea, and it’s something you guys can continue to do next winter, to reflect back on your wedding day, and plan out your future together!
i want bubble bath planning sessions! Maybe I can convince my hubby to have house decorating bubble bath sessions. Amazing idea!
We have a hot tub (I still live with mom and dad) so over the winter I would invite Mr. BW over for a “tub” and we would run out in the freeeeezing New England weather and jump right in! Once we were in it was hard to get out…wet…in your swimsuit….in ten degrees Fahrenheit. Needless to say we stayed in there and did a lot of talking. About us…when we would be ready…the future. There’s nothing better than to relax and dream about the future amidst bubbles
@Miss Mary Jane: That’s the last place we can talk. He gets lost and annoyed and can only concentrate on one thing at a time. He tries, but it’s just not worth the frustration. Ugg. I’m all stressed just thinking about it.
We tend to get into bed with our laptops- me with Word open taking notes, and him with Firefox open, looking through inspiration pictures. It works most of the time, except when he decides he needs to check his email. Then I lose him for ten minutes!
Brilliant! I wish we had a big tub. Our best talking place is the car on long road trips like Miss Mary Jane. He usually drives, so I get his undivided Blackberry-free attention!
There wasn’t much “us” time in our wedding planning. All Mr. K wanted was alcohol at the reception and…well, now that I think about it, just the alcohol. Couldn’t really get him to weigh in on much else!
Seriously, this idea is genius My Mr. wont touch the tub unless it includes me…but I am so going to hold meetings there now!
Wow… I’m so jealous that all of you seem to have meetings with your FI to plan the wedding details. My FI gets upset if I talk about the wedding 2 days in a row. We’ve agreed that I will handle the details and just bring him in on the big stuff. On the bright side, that makes things easier for me, but sometimes I get so excited about things that I feel like I’m going to burst if I can’t talk about it. Anyhow, I have to figure out what will be the best way to have brief conversations about the big things and keep him from feeling stressed and overwhelmed. Thankfully my Maids enjoy discussing the details.
We have a bar in our basement that currently is home to a broken television, so it is the base for our wedding pow-wows. Give each of us a great pint and we can work almost anything out… maybe in my next house I’ll have a tub…
I want to say that for all of you ladies out there who don’t have fiances who are all about the planning…there can be a dark side to having such an involved guy. Sometimes I just want to make a decision because I like it, and I know that I can’t do it without his buy in…and when he doesn’t like something I love (ahem, bird caketopper!), it’s a major downer!
Thanks, Miss Stiletto. I’ll try to remind myself about the positives of our arrangement when I have to stifle my wedding related squeals and chatter. Thank God for this site! It’s where I get my wedding fix.
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Mrs. Stiletto, Chicago
Age and Occupation: 26, Non-Profit/Fundraising
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Engineer and Photographer
Engagement Date: March 2, 2008
Wedding Date: September 2009
Venue: The 19th Century Club
About Me: My fiance and I love living in the city of Chicago with our cats Basil and Linus, and vow to never move to the suburbs if we can possibly avoid it! We’ve poured ourselves into planning a wedding that reflects our personal style - modern and high contrast with a vintage twist. Blogging keeps me creative, baking keeps me happy, and grande nonfat no foam sugar free vanilla lattes keep me sane.
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