Wedding Blog
Hi, Hive - I’ve missed you ladies! (And gents! - Gents? Do boys read this blog?) 
Long time no blog - mainly because I was busy crying in my oatmeal. (Kidding - mostly!)
I just got back from my Honeymoon turned Sistamoon, and I promise to share all of the deets with you soon: including cruise and travel tips, as well as a DIY travel journal to end all travel journals (The journal is either incredibly amazing, or incredibly obsessive-compulsive, depending on how you look at it.) Before we get to that though, I was moved to write this blog because I am still active on the Weddingbee message boards, and on a fairly regular-ish basis, I see a post by a bride who had to call off her wedding, due to a variety of horrible circumstances.
Weddingbee is about the experience of moving towards the altar, and for some brides, that journey gets cut short, which is what happened to me.
I have gained what feels like a master’s degree in love recently, and I feel like this merits a post to support those brides whose world seems to have fallen in, as well as to help those of you support a bud of yours who may be starting over in the marriage/love department.
To those of you who are calling off your wedding - IT SUCKS A WHOLE LOT, doesn’t it? Especially when the sudden relationship bomb is infidelity. I want to give you a little hope…
Your best days are ahead of you. Really.
Even though I am in no way glad Mr. ex-Snapdragon cheated on me, I am SO thankful I found out before we got married. As anyone who has been through a divorce will tell you - getting divorced is way more horrible than breaking up, even when you are calling off a wedding. I was able to walk away immediately, with no lawyers. When you’re married, you don’t get to do that.
The worst months are definitely the ones that immediately follow your breakup, but now that I am four months out… I don’t really cry about it anymore. I actually feel good most of the time, instead of totally broken. I have fun and laugh now (which was unthinkable several months ago!)
Another tough thing about calling off a wedding is that at least a hundred people are now all up in your business; you don’t really get to be private about it. You know what that means… lots of advice (!) which is the last thing we need. Thankfully, even though many people loved to word vomit their horrible cheating stories on me, my close friends and family were smart enough to just say, “Snappy, how are you doing?” and then take me out for multiple margaritas and tell me lots of jokes.
The most loving thing any buddy or family member can do is to just show you that they love you. Nobody that has called off their wedding wants advice, none of us want to hear your sad cheating story - we just want to know that you love us and support our decision that we have made for ourselves. I think the worst thing someone said to me was, “I always thought he was a cheater - I’m not surprised.” :O
So again, I want to reiterate that calling off your wedding is an excruciating event… but it really does get better. I will say this again: Your best days are ahead of you.
In news of the miraculous, I am going on my first post-Mr.-ex-Snap date this week, and I am kind of totally excited about it!
Breaking up doesn’t have to break you. Keep your chin up.
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Share this post: Starting Over is Really Not That Bad, Ackshually
Oh, Snaps! What a brave post - I’m sure it will help people going through this. I’m so glad you’re doing so well and I hope your date is magical 
You are a glorious writer, and an even more glorious spirit. I am so happy for you!
Aw, Snappy I’m so glad to hear that you are doing well. And I’m SUPER excited for you about the date!
I’m so glad everything worked out for the best. You’ll “snapping” up someone new in no time!
Snappy you rock and have a swoonworthy date!! So excited for you.
Wow! I only recently joined the hive so I didn’t know your story, but thank you for sharing! Thank goodness you found out when you did and not later… and good luck on your date!!
Snappy, this makes me SO happy I am grinning at my computer I am so happy you are going on a date… and I can’t wait to hear about your Sistamoon.
Welcome back Snappy! This was a beautiful post. I can’t wait to hear about your sistamoon! Have a great date!
@Miss Joey: hahaha, i love a good pun.
Snappy! I got all excited when I saw a post from you! I am so excited to read your upcoming posts! And I am excited about your date!
Wow what an awesome post. You have such a great outlook on life. I hope your date is lots of fun.
@Miss Labrador: Seriously, that is **exactly** what I was going to write. Haha!
Dearest Snappy, I have nothing left to say, as Miss Lab stole my thoughts straight out of my head.
Can you please be the new DatingBee?? I talk to girls ALL of the time on here that aren’t even engaged or even have boyfriends for that matter… so I’m sure those girls, as long as the rest of us would LOVE to here your stories. When I saw you posted I got soooo oober excited to see what you had to read about (of course hoping it was good news!) so please don’t be a stranger Miss Single Snappy!
As a divorce lawyer who’s had more than one client tell me that “I knew it was a bad idea as I was walking down the aisle,” I commend you for taking the difficult, but undoubtedly right step of calling it off. It must have been hard after everything that you planned and dreamed, but I know for sure you will happier for it. Thanks for sharing your story - I hope that it will let other people know that if something’s really not right, you can back out and move on! You rock, and your upcoming date is only lucky guy!!
thanks miss snapdragon for your post… have a blast on your date! your outlook on life is absolutely beautiful.
We love you Snappy, and we’re so glad you’re back to posting! Hope you have a fabulous date!
Thank you for this post!! I’m so glad to hear you’re doing well and to see you posting on the Bee again!
You’re awesome! and you’re absolutely right - breaking up doesn’t have to break you. Thank you for posting this and I’ll cross my fingers for you for a magical first date!
I love that you’re still writing posts… I’m excited to hear all about your happy new adventures!
Woo!! Can’t wait to hear more about the sistamoon! And yay for a hot date! I’m glad to hear everything is looking up for you now!
I remember reading your last post and actually cried with you. I wasn’t engaged but was in a similar relationship where everyone thought for sure I would have married him, boy am I glad I didn’t stay in that relationship. I wouldn’t have met hokieboy
SO glad things have turned around and you have such a POSITIVE direction! Best of luck on the date!
Good for you! So happy to hear you are doing well. I peek at your personal blog from time to time and you are very inspirational - even for people just breaking up with bad habits.
All the best!
Great post and I totally can’t relate, but none the less, my sister told me this quote once.
“The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else!”
Hope your date goes well!
we MISSED you SO much!
Thanks for this post, for being an amazing strong woman, and for sharing your story with us as well as all your nosy would-have-been wedding guests.
have a fantastic date. so excited for you!
Great post!
YAY!!! I think you should definitely blog about this date! Inquiring (nosy) minds want to know!
@hbowar: HAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!! love it!
I’m so happy for you Snappy! I hope that date goes awesome for you. We all really missed you here and I can’t wait to hear from you more.
I’m glad you are recovering! Let us know how the date goes!
Snaps-I will totally go out for margaritas with you and tell you jokes-but hopefully over stories of the raddest of first dates!
Snappy, Please, please stay on Weddingbee! We’d love it if you can write us posts .. they’re so encouraging and we’d also love to support you in your new life!
I missed you! You go girl!
I have a feeling that the best is yet to come. It may sound cheesy…but life really DOES have a way of working out. I just have this feeling…..that 10 years from now..you will be happy and in love and married….maybe even a houseful of kids. You will be with someone who gives you everything you ever wanted…..you will look back at poor Mr. Snap and think “wow! Am I glad that ended or I never would have had this amazing life and love I have now!”
I am so happy to see a post from you and hear that you are in a much better place.
Just think…you have no idea what is ahead of you….it could be amazing!
the best really is yet to come
that’s really inspirational. Though my wedding didn’t happen for other reasons (god’s willing), I think I’ll follow your step and move forward too! Thank you and have a fantastic time on your date!
snappy! i’m so glad to hear you’re doing well and thriving! i hope the rest of your steps continue to grow easier i’ve missed you!
@BucknellBride: Haha, I don’t mind sharing the exact same comment!
:-) you deserve a great date! he better be worth it!
Snappy - I’m so proud of you, and so proud to know you. And so excited for you!!
YAY Snappy! Missed you! I cant wait to hear about your sistamoon.
And I’m sure your date will be awed by your awesomeness!
Thank you for sharing your experience after 4 months. I can’t help but smile to see how courageously you have handled the situation. A lot of women would curl up and dwell in misery. Good for you that you choose to take a more positive approach. I love that you still got to enjoy your Sistamoon. Lastly, I wish your self-determination and courage could rub off on more women who are going through similar situations.
I hope you have a fabulous date! I am so happy you’re doing great and thank you so much for sharing your life and courage with us.
Can’t wait to hear the stories and pics from sistamoon! What an amazing celebration it sounds like! After I divorced my xh, we had an “independence day” celebration and went on a girl’s vacay over the 4th that year (2004) to have fun! I still think that was the most fun weekend ever!
Starting over is rough, we both know about that, but this is a great time!!! You’re doing amazing, new things and are surrounded by those you love and who love you too! In the meantime, have a blast! Wishing you love, hugs, and lots of smiles and a wonderful summer!
wow, what a story - you’re so brave and strong. good luck with everything!
Yes, I am a gent and I’m glad to hear from you and that you are doing well. Things happen for a reason. Continue to have fun!
@hbowar: That. Is. Hilarious.
@MaPo: Girl, I will do margaritas with you anytime - and I gotz jokes for you too!@Kelly: I kind of think he might be… we’ve been talking every day for two weeks and we are old friends. I must admit to being TWITTERPATED. He doesn’t know it, but he has some smooching in his future. (scandalous!)
Snappy, you are one of the strongest women I have encountered. Ever. I’ll keep this in my mind for all bad times, you are an inspiration! Good luck on the date!!!
You’ve handled this with such grace. I’m very impressed and always glad when I see one of your posts.
Snappy I am SOO GLAD to have you back! You are so amazing and brave.
I hope you have a fanfriggentastic first date!
Everyone else is right — you are such a strong, brave, independent woman. =) I’ll bet Mr. Snap is going to regret this the rest of his life.
I hope your date goes well!
oh snappy, i’m so happy to see you writing and in good spirits. i hope your date is AWESOME! *huge hugs*
Yay . I hope your date goes super well, if not at least it’ll be a good chance to wear a cute dress.
I wish you all the best.
Snappy, you are one amazing lady. Congrats on the upcoming date, and your ability to have such a wonderful lookout on things!!!!!
So glad to see you posting again! Hope the date is fabulous and love the new map business too! Good luck!
You’re so amazing A my FI’s cousin’s engagement was just broken off (by her FI) over the weekend. I’m definitely going to take your advice about not word vomiting all over her. I’m SO glad to hear that you have a *DATE*!!! Can’t wait to hear all about the Sistamoon, the date (if you choose to share), and anything else you blog about. You truly are an inspiration
You are such a spectacular lady! You deserve nothing but the best, and I have a strong inkling that that “best” is right around the corner. Love you, Snaps!
Welcome back Snappy! I’m so glad to hear from you. You are so awesome and I can’t wait to hear about the sistamoon and the date! Your post just made my night!
I am so happy you’re back! I’d missed hearing from you! I’m among the multitudes who can’t wait to hear about your sistamoon!
Can’t wait to hear about the Sistamoon Glad to have you back around here on Weddingbee… you’re sure an awesome and amazing and brave person.
Hugs!!! I am sooo proud of you, you are my hero. Thanks for being an awesome role model for other ladies.
Aw, Snappy… thank you so much for that post. You are so honest, and mature about the whole thing… lots of peeps cant learn from you.
I am really happy for you and that date…. hmm you better share some details… me want to know
Good luck and take your time… but who am I kidding you know that already xxx
Snappy!! I’ve missed you and can’t wait to hear about tha sistamoon! There has been a little something, something missing without you around!
Yay! I’m so glad you’re back! Thank you for posting!
Good for you! I am so glad things are on the up and up! You deserve it!!
I think it is great that you have been so honest about your break-up and I am sure it will help brides going through something similar. You should start your own blog or a book about it because you are enjoyable to read and could offer sound advice to brides who call off their weddings!
Good luck to you!
Aw, Snap! Just kidding. . .I had to say it, really :).
Anyway, glad you’re back Snappy! I admire your great attitude! Keep it up!
You’re such a strong woman. Thank you for sharing your experience with us and I’m look forward to more posts from you. I wish you all the best
I’m glad you’re back! I think the world of you and admire you so much for all of the strength you’ve shown through all of this. I wish nothing but the best for you!
And please—-Give us a little post-date recap! I hope it’s awesome and that you have a great time!
Sounds like you have a wicked awesome family and a great spirit! So glad to hear you’re doing well!
YEAH! SO happy to hear you’re doing well Snappy! I was devastated for you when I read your post many months ago. It’s hard to look ahead during rough patches in life but you’re proof that the bad times don’t last forever. You’re an inspiration!
I am so glad that you wrote in an update, and that you are doing so well! I hope that all goes well for you in the future, and enjoy your date!
I’m glad to hear from you……..glad you are doing well. Best luck on your date!
I said this on the encore post just the other day, I’m an encore-FI. Called off the wedding 6 months prior and the emotions I went through were very difficult. My new FI was also engaged. He has been so understanding that no one else could give me to help me move on. My girlfriend just called off her wedding and my advice to her and you is go out there and have fun dating and hanging out with friends. And you are so right, it does get better from here! Your post to girls who may go thru this or have a friend who does was a great idea! Good advice
Aww shnap! Here she comes! I could just hear the background music playing in your head (or my head…ala Ally McBeal) on the way to your date as you’re feeling fabulous: I get knocked down but I get up again, you’re never gonna get my down! (from the song Tubthumping by Chumbawamba)
Smiles all around. Thanks for such an uplifting post! Glad to hear all is well, and improving!
I love when you wrote,”Breaking up doesn’t have to break you.” Snaps to you, Snappy! You are a strong and beautiful woman.
You really are inspirational. Thank you for continuing to post.
Thanks for coming up and showing us the good and light at the end of the tunnel!
Snap, you are truly an inspiration of strength for all of us! You are simple amazing and definitely should not (and I know you won’t ) settle for less. Have a wonderous date….and run back here to tell us ALL about it! Mwah!
I am so glad that you are doing well! I have been wondering and praying for you! Thanks for the great post. I know a lot of women and relate and needed a voice like yours to tell them that there is better times to come!
Good for you Snappy!! Glad you are so happpy. Have fun on your date.
I’m so glad you’re back and doing well. I think you have a wonderful attitude and amazing perspective on everything!
Wow. What a great post! You not only offered words of wisdom for getting through a broken engagement but for others as well.
Welcome back!! I have missed reading your blog so much. You are fabulous and (even though I don’t know you) I am proud of you : )
So happy to have you back! Can’t wait to hear more about the sistamoon. Hope you have a blast on your date!
Oh Snappy, you’re the greatest! I’m so glad you posted again! This was awesome!
I was thinking about you this week and hoping we’d hear an update soon! I’m so glad you’re doing well and moving on and healing. Congrats! And hurray for your date! ^_^
Mayhaps this new fella has some smooching planned for you as well. Is it scandalous if you both plot it separately?
I hope everything goes swell for you! You have such a marvelous attitude!
I firmly believe all things happen for a reason. Have a perfectly scandalously smoochable date.
You are amazing Snappy! We have missed you! Best of luck on your date Your guy is out there and he will be just as incredible as you are!
What an incredible post. I’m new (been around since April) so I didn’t know what happened. I can’t even imagine. Good for you though for not letting it destroy you. I hope you have a fabulous date!!!!
Snappy, yours was one of the first blogs I read when I discovered Weddingbee earlier this year. I was so sad for you, but happy at the same time that you found out in time. I’m so glad you’re back and can’t wait to hear about your sistamoon!
Your post first caught my attention because you wondered if boys read these blogs. I’m the groom, and I love coming on here to read and see new ideas.
Then I actually read the blog. *sigh* I don’t know what to say. It seems that you have a great attitude, and of course, this is a great place to find support. Look at all the comments!
Above all else, please don’t blame yourself for anything, and you deserve better!
Oh sooo excited for you about your date! So good to hear from you, and I have no word vomitting (that cracked me up) to impart! We love you, Snaps.
you. are. simply. a. rockstar.
thanks for sharing your story and being so positive, you rock! more powah to you girl!
Hooray, I missed reading your posts, I’m glad you’re back and doing so well! Have a blast on your date!!
Well Done, we are all very proud of you. Onwards and Upwards!!
Thank you for sharing your story. You are clearly a strong, amazing woman.
You are so inspiring snappy. I was so sad when everything happened you were a bee after my own heart. I was so happy when I stumbled across your personal blog (I tried the weight watchers tortellini recipe and it is DELISH). Can’t wait to hear about your sistermoon. GL on the date.
when i saw your intro for this entry i thought, is it her? hehe we’ve missed you too and you are freaking awesome. chin up indeed!
I love you, Miss Snappy! I remember how amazing you were over your break-up, and I’m so glad you posted here again. Have a great time on your first date!
I love you. Have a blessed life!! PLEASE post again when you have fantastic life-wedding news!!
You are awesome. I especially love your last line. I’m so excited for you, have FUN on your date!!
Glad to hear you’re doing better and congratulations on taking that first big step in dating again.
I’m so happy to hear that you’re laughing again… and I’d also like to say congrats on the map shop! I’ve seen pix on Weddingbee posts from some of the BEEs and the maps look amazing!
Super excited for you on the DATE
You have a great attitude about everything - it’s great, and I’m glad you enjoyed your sistamoon!!
And, good luck on your date this week!
Oh. I’m so happy to read your post.
My wedding would have been in two weeks; instead I’m completely devastated. Everyone says “at least you weren’t married, at least it didn’t happen a year from now, five years from now…” but it’s so different to hear it from someone who’s gone through the agony of calling off a marriage.
Thank you for your words. Everything feels black right now, but thanks for assuring me there’s a light at the end of this very dark tunnel. Seriously, Snappy. Thanks.
Thanks so much for this post, Miss Snappy! I’m looking forward to hearing about your sistamoon and I hope you have a fantabulous time on your date!
I had a wedding called off too, though several months before the wedding, and he actually called off the wedding (reason still unknown, but almost 3 years later I could care less).
It hurts for a while, and it will still “haunt you” for a long time, maybe forever. My fi (now) is a somewhat insecure guy having been hurt in the past, so it does hurt him that we’re not both wedding virgins. I just remind him that this is different, and even if I did something before it doesn’t mean this isn’t special. Be mindful of that in the future. It might be a sore point for some guys, but w/ the right guy you’ll work through it together.
There are a lot of people who will want to give you their opinion, maybe just to be gossipy. Maybe they think it will help, I don’t know; just try to ignore it and accept that they think they are being helpful. At least they are there for you.
I have been where you are and it is such a relief to make it to the place where you’ve stopped crying and start living. When you’re in that pit of despair you feel like you’ll never make it out, but then you do- and great things happen! My mom told me when I was in the pit that this was the best thing that could have ever happened to me “WHAT??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? How is having my heart ripped out and stomped on the best thing that could happen to me?” Well, she was exactly right, which she reminded me the day my fiance proposed- and to her delight- I agreed with her. I did SO many awesome things when I was single. For the first time I lived for ME, and I learned so much about myself. And when I met my fi, I was the me I needed/wanted to be, and that is so fulfilling.
Best wishes- now go have the time of your life and be grateful you avoided disaster!
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Miss Snapdragon, Chicago
Age and Occupation: 30, Production Assistant for a Media Firm
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 30, Education Administrator
Wedding Date: June, 2009
Blogging Since: November 14, 2008
Venue: The Hyatt Lodge
About Me: Vintage and crafting obsessed. Voracious reader of short stories, Russian literature, National Geographic and Cosmo. I am a GENIUS at spicing up Weight Watchers recipes and a pathological cheater at board games. A Texan transplanted to the snowy Midwest, I can't wait to marry my one and only. Is it June yet? ... What about now?
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