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Mrs. Mary Jane, Grand Forks, ND Age and Occupation: 26, Instructional Designer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Lead Programmer Engagement Date: February 28, 2009 Wedding Date: September 2009 Venue: City Hall About Me: I'm a career woman on the surface and a homemaker at heart. I love fast cars and high heels, and my favorite food is cake. Mr. Mary Jane and I are both full-time employees and students, and we just bought our first house. We love to curl up on the couch with buttery popcorn, Sour Patch Kids, and the latest Netflix arrival -- whenever we can get a break from everyday life.
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Splurge? On Myself? Ha!

July 10th, 2009 @ 4:29 pm by Mrs. Mary Jane

Several bees have written about the splurges they’ve made on their own health, appearance, and mental well being. From new skincare regimens to personal trainers, a lot of brides have used their upcoming weddings as an excellent excuse to make positive and rewarding changes in their self-care.

I have frequently tried to talk myself into things like this. I build myself up and decide to spend the money on better shampoo or a manicure or something that’s just for me. And then I get to the store or the website and… I just. Can’t. Do it. I talk myself out of it. We have too many other things to worry about; I feel horribly guilty and irresponsible spending $40 on a manicure or $200 on good makeup. I rarely even go shopping for clothes unless I need something, and half the time I’ll either talk myself out of the purchase, or try to find it as cheaply as possible. (Even though Mr. Mary Jane is completely on board with me spending money on myself.)

Case in point: I recently won a free tube of Bad Girl Waterproof mascara. My normal waterproof mascara is the basic Maybelline Great Lash Waterproof Mascara. I’m pretty happy with it, but it’s a little clumpy and makes my eyelashes feel heavy when I wear it. It’s also pretty difficult to remove. Not the case with Bad Girl. This is The Shit. I can wear it every day, and wash it off at night. No flakes, no clumps, no eyelids-stuck-together, and it even makes my lashes and eyes look a lot better than the Great Lash does. It’s awesome. It makes me think that more expensive makeup is a worthy investment. But the thing is… I won it. It’s normally about $20, whereas my Great Lash is about $6. Would I buy Bad Girl again?

Probably not. I’d probably stand around in front of the display, holding the tube and having a mental budgeting pep-talk. I might even walk halfway to the checkout before ultimately returning it to the shelf. When it comes to me, I am cheap. Even though I know that “you get what you pay for” in a lot of cases.

But here’s my issue. I could spend $20 for this…

Splurge? On Myself? Ha! :  wedding makeup Badgal

[source]

…or I could save it for this.

Splurge? On Myself? Ha! :  wedding makeup Movie T

[source]

It’s not that we don’t have any money to be flexible with. It’s just that I like to spend that money on stuff that’s for both of us (or just my Mister- he’s got a b-day coming up!). I guess that’s where my priorities lie. I can’t see spending $50 on a mani/pedi when Mr. MJ and I could go out to a nice dinner with that money instead. $200 on my dress? That was hard. Especially when I know that Mr. MJ could use some new computer monitors, or that we could have put that money toward a car loan or honeymoon savings.

I have made some investments in myself. I pay for prescription medicines that have practically cured my acne (they’re only partially covered by insurance). I get my hair cut at an Aveda salon instead of Cost Cutters (but I don’t buy their expensive hair or skin products). I buy a lot of shoes (albeit, mostly clearance shoes). But that’s about where the me-spending stops. I don’t need y’all to talk me in to spending big money on makeup and massages, but I would love to know your experiences with spending on yourselves.

Do you find it hard to spend money on yourself? What are your splurges, and what can’t you bear to buy?

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61 Responses to “Splurge? On Myself? Ha!”

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1.
Guest Icon
Guest
Andrea

I need to buy new bras but I never want too. It just seems dumb to me to spend $50+ on a new bra. i’ve never spent that much on one in my life before but with my increasing boob size it looks like i may need to splurge and buy a bra that actually offers support instead of my usual $15 target or kohl’s bras.

 
2.
LovestheBear
Member
LovestheBear (message)  1,250 posts, Bumble bee

I am totally with you. As much as I love the idea of buying something nice for myself I can’t do it. Mani/pedis are the hardest to justify and therefore the rarest treat. The lamest guilty pleasure I partake in is online shopping–I find a great sale, load up my shopping cart and then close the window right after the budget guilt sets in.

 
3.
Mrs. Penguin
Bee
Mrs. Penguin (message)  3,499 posts, Sugar bee

I splurge on myself all the time. It’s the only thing that keeps me sane. It’s the little things that get me through life, and I’ve got no shame that my toes are always in perfect polished condition. I work hard, and I deserve it!

 
4.
TheEditrix
Member
TheEditrix (message)  135 posts, Blushing bee

Oh geez, I’m the worst. I think my sentiments lie more along the lines of Pengy’s … I work hard for the money, so hard for it honey. I am mostly bad about spending on cosmetics, and somewhat on clothes/shoes/handbags (though I will typically only buy those at a reasonable discount). It’s more a matter of discipline than anything (or lack thereof) … but yeah, I could use some, for sure, because soon enough we’ll be looking to buy a house, and those $150 trips to Sephora will be only a distant memory. If I were a rich girl!

 
5.
Bee Icon
Bee
miss sunbeam (message)  545 posts, Busy bee

I sometimes find it hard to spend on myself! I’ll take myself to go shopping, then end up with nothing after over thinking the price tag on things! Or I’ll check out the same outfit a few times, then finally buy it when I think - ok yes I really do want this. On occasion I let loose and splurge without over thinking it, I have on a few things for the wedding, but that’s not the norm for me!

 
6.
Miss Dachshund
Bee
Miss Dachshund (message)  689 posts, Busy bee

I love to splurge on myself, but it’s so hard when there are so many other things that I need to buy. I can easilly drop $300 at Sephora, but then I think… “ugh, that’s 1/3 of what a photobooth would cost!”

Mrs. Bee’s post really got me craving a trip to Sephora, though…

 
7.
moderndaisy
Member
moderndaisy (message)  6,607 posts, Bee Keeper

I normally have a huge splurge every couple months instead of a regular treat here or there. Like I’ll wake up one day and decide all my clothes are old and gross and I’ll spend $500 on a new wardrobe. But I won’t get regular mani/pedis or go out to eat.

 
8.
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Member
bostonbride919 (message)  23 posts, Newbee

I wish you could give me some of that feeling!!! I splurge on myself ALL of the time… I figure you only live once, so live it up! :)

 
9.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Snapdragon (message)  717 posts, Busy bee

I totally understand where you are coming from - I am a Scrooge when it comes to myself. HOWEVER, [in my opinion] it’s important to treat yourself to things once in awhile. As long as you aren’t going overboard or spending money just to spend it… I think it’s worth it. For me, I select specific things that I am allowed to splurge on: good jeans and mascaras. Recently, I splurged on a whole makeup extravaganza, but that was for the first time in about five years. On a regular basis, I’ll splurge on mascara and then new 7 jeans, when I need them.

I say, pick a couple splurges, and maybe that’ll be a strategy that works for you too!

 
10.
Habibi
Member
Habibi (message)  567 posts, Busy bee

I don’t hesitate when it comes to personal grooming - hair and skin especially. I hold back on clothes but when I give myself the green light I do go for it. I am a great sale shopper though. Btw, I bet you can find your mascara on ebay. I buy a lot of high end beauty products that way! Don’t deprive yourself to much. If/when you decide to have children it will be so important to take the time to take care of yourself. Get in the habit now! (words of wisdom from my mom, who actually forced my aunt to get a weekly manicure when she first had kids)

 
11.
Guest Icon
Guest
cg

I think part of my problem is not wanting to be that girl who spends money on herself. Most of the time I see it as frivolous, and frivality I have not. But I realized that those who were frivolous that I saw, were that way because they spent money they already had, on things they did not need. They had three tubes of expensive mascara and bought it on a credit card for which they could barely afford the minumum payment. I did not want to be labeled as they were. It took me awhile, but I finally realized I was not being like them, if I wasn’t like them.

Get it?

I had one tube of good mascara that I used until it was bone dry, and I bought it with cash, money that I had for that purpose and spending it did not leave me in debt of unable to pay my other bills. So I am not frivolous for buying good mascara. Even if I spend money on myself, I am still sensible, practical and smart…and damn if I don’t look good doing it!

 
12.
Member Icon
Member
TheMapChick (message)  119 posts, Blushing bee

My fiance is a saver, but he doesn’t have a problem with money I spend on myself. I’ve tried to be more budget conscious as a result of his influence but on the other hand sometimes I find myself encouraging him to spend a little on himself. I mean it’s great to be fiscally responsible and prepared but at the same time you have to live a little sometimes, right?

 
13.
kjpugs
Member
kjpugs (message)  1,751 posts, Buzzing bee

@Andrea: I AM SO WITH YOU ANDREA! I need new ones bad but I just keep on going on and on with the old ones…

 
14.
Tulips
Member
Tulips (message)  40 posts, Newbee

Ms. Mary Jane, I so know what you are talking about. I used to use Cover Girls color stay blush. They would run me about $8~9 per month. Sometimes I would get them on sale buy 1 get 1 free or 50% off. However, despite the name “Color Stay” it does not last all day. I would have to re-apply at least once in the afternoon. And then one time at Macy’s when I pass by the Dior counter, the beautician convinced me to get a free makeover. Thinking it was free, I gave it a try. All in all, it was good, but what really impressed me was their blush. It lasted all day and night. So, I eventually caved in and bought one for $31. However, it has lasted for well over 6 months, and it is now time for a new one. I am still hoping that some promotion or freebie will happen soon so I can convince myself to buy it again. Sorry for the long post.

 
15.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Spaniel (message)  6,792 posts, Bee Keeper

I have moments of both… it’s hard to spend on myself for things like haircuts or manicures (regular expenses that constantly need to be redone), but I haven’t really held back on buying nice things (designer jeans? yes please!), even though I’ve felt terribly guilty about it. I think I just like putting money towards things that both make me feel fabulous and also LAST…

 
16.
Tulips
Member
Tulips (message)  40 posts, Newbee

@Andrea:

If my boobs increased on their own, I would be more than happy to buy them new sexy bras to house them……j/k lol.

 
17.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Kitten (message)  868 posts, Busy bee

Like Pengy, don’t feel bad about spending money on myself. I work really hard and if something is going to increase my overall quality of life and I can afford it, then I get it! Now that we are combining our incomes, Mr. K and I are setting what you could call “splurge budgets” so that we can occasionally treat ourselves to things without spending too much.

 
18.
Member Icon
Member
Juju (message)  44 posts, Newbee

I’ve always found it hard to splurge on myself (other than a good haircut, being a curly girl!), but I’m getting better at it ;)

 
19.
Miss French Bulldog
Bee
Miss French Bulldog (message)  7,730 posts, Bee Keeper

I also don’t feel that bad about spending money on myself… I don’t go over board but I buy things that I want and can afford :) I save money where I can, but I like to splurge on certain things. When we’re married we going to set up “splurge budgets” like Mrs. Kitten :)

 
20.
evelinej
Member
evelinej (message)  370 posts, Helper bee

I splurge on myself sometimes as long as I can afford it. When I wasn’t working then I was in “no spending mode”.

 
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Mrs. Mary Jane
Mrs. Mary Jane

Mrs. Mary Jane, Grand Forks, ND Age and Occupation: 26, Instructional Designer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Lead Programmer Engagement Date: February 28, 2009 Wedding Date: September 2009 Venue: City Hall About Me: I'm a career woman on the surface and a homemaker at heart. I love fast cars and high heels, and my favorite food is cake. Mr. Mary Jane and I are both full-time employees and students, and we just bought our first house. We love to curl up on the couch with buttery popcorn, Sour Patch Kids, and the latest Netflix arrival -- whenever we can get a break from everyday life.

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