Wedding Blog

You’d think I could have made it through the ring exchange without causing a scene, but that would’ve been too easy! The officiant asked our maid of honor and best man to hand her the rings so we could get the show on the road. For some reason, I had my maid of honor hand me the ring and then realized she was supposed to give it directly to the officiant. Whoopsies! Of course, this resulted in me mumbling to myself and apologizing for being such a space cadet, which made the wedding party burst with laughter. I told myself I would get through the rest of the ceremony calm, cool and collected with no more outbursts. Yeah, that didn’t happen…

These two rings that you are about to exchange will be the outward symbols of your vows. They are signs anyone can read—declaring to the world that you have made the commitment to share all that you are and all that you have with one another—in happiness and in sorrow, in plenty and in want, in sickness and in health—as you spend the rest of your days loving and caring for each other.

Mr. Candy Corn, would you now place Miss Candy Corn’s wedding band on her finger, repeating after me?

(Notice how Mr. Candy Corn stylishly tucked his vows into his pocket and just let them chillax there for the rest of the ceremony! Hahah, oh dearie.)

“With this ring I marry you,
And join my life to yours,
Now and forever.”

When Mr. Candy Corn was trying to slide my ring on, it wasn’t going over my knuckle very gracefully (I tend to swell up like a balloon when I’m nervous, haha). So I had to shove it on after his failed attempts, while grunting, of course. See his face in this photo? Yeah, that was him struggling to get it over my beastly knuckle.

Miss Candy Corn, would you now place Mr. Candy Corn’s wedding band on his finger, repeating after me?

As soon as Mr. Candy Corn put his hand out, I noticed how badly it was shaking and proceeded to hold my hand out and shake it frantically in mockery of the poor hubs-to-be. Le sigh. Feisty Miss Candy Corn!

“With this ring I marry you,
And join my life to yours,
Now and forever.”

Okay, this one takes some explaining because I realize I look like I am trying to take a swing at Mr. Candy Corn’s face in the photo. Have you ever seen the early episodes of the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air when Will Smith mouthed along all of the actor’s lines? Well, that’s exactly what Mr. Candy Corn was doing while I was repeating the words of our officiant. He was mouthing along every single word with me and it was incredibly distracting and resulted in me having yet another giggle fit. Then I realized that no one else had a clue about what I was laughing at, so I did my best to nervously explain to the officiant (and the rest of our guests who could hear me) that he was mouthing along all of the words without meaning to.

Insert more giggling from us and the wedding party here _______.

From this day forward, whenever you see these rings, may you be reminded of this moment and of the endless love you’ve promised to one another.

And now we have come to that time in the ceremony when the officiant offers the couple some very wise advice on how to make a happy marriage. I’m sure you’ll all be relieved to hear that I’m not going to do that today. Instead, in closing, I offer you the words of Dante Alighieri.

I’m going to regret admitting this, but I chose this quote by Dante Alighieri because I was so moved when I heard it read on One Tree Hill. There, I said it. So. Embarrassing. I think I had a slight crush on Brooke Davis, but that’s beside the point. I don’t watch the show anymore, but I did back in the earlier days (not that it was any better then, come on now) and I immediately Googled the quote so I could find out who the writer was and make a note to use it in our ceremony.

I glanced over at my mom and saw her bawling and not-so-subtly mouthed, “Stop crying!!” because she was making me all verklempt.

“Remember tonight, for it is the beginning of always. A promise. Like a reward for persisting through life so long alone. A belief in each other and the possibility of love. A decision to ignore, simply rise above the pain of the past. A covenant, which at once binds two souls, and yet severs prior ties. A celebration of the chance taken and the challenge that lies ahead. For two will always be stronger than one, like a team braced against the tempest civil world. And love will always be the guiding force in our lives. For tonight is mere formality. Only an announcement to the world of feelings long held. Promises made long ago. In the sacred spaces of our hearts.”

?And so, Mr. and Miss Candy Corn–Our wish for you is this: May you continue to make each other smile and laugh as much as humanly possible. May you always find time for stargazing together. May you be forever surrounded by the love of friends, family, poodles, rabbits and chinchillas… and may you wake up each morning for the rest of your lives only to fall in love with each other all over again!

And now, since you have spoken your vows before these witnesses, and exchanged wedding rings as symbols of your love, fidelity and commitment, it is with great joy that I finally say the words you’ve been waiting for: I now pronounce you husband and wife!”

I noticed Mr. Candy Corn’s glasses were sliding down his nose, like a wee old man librarian, so I adjusted them for him (see video below for nerdom). I was so terrified to have to kiss Mr. Candy Corn in front of our friends and family. I am so not a PDA girl when it comes to kissing, so of course I did a little nervous shimmy and made a four-chinned ‘Oh god, I hope I don’t mess this up and embarrass myself too much!’ face while trying to wiggle out of the room without anyone noticing. Epic fail. Do yourself a favor and fast forward to the 3:09 mark in the video and check out the face I made right before having to smooch Mr. Candy Corn. What. The Hell. Was That? That’s the face I make while I normally say, “sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyit,” so you have to imagine that’s what was going through my head at the time.

“You may kiss your bride!!”

(Phew, I survived the public smooches.)

It was exhilarating having all of our guests applauding us. We both just felt so much love and emotions, it was absolutely unforgettable. It made my heart melt like that darn adorable tiger that nursed those tiger-costumed piglets. You know the one I mean…

My makeup artist would’ve been proud that I didn’t shed a tear, no thanks to Mama Candy Corn who was a hot mess of emotions (I suppose I can’t blame her, though)!

Our lovely officiant, Natalie Kita, telling everyone to rise and that the cocktail hour was about to begin.

A teary-eyed Mama Candy Corn with Papa Candy Corn.

Mr. Candy Corn’s mom & stepfather, who were a smashing duo and went all out to match our wedding colors.

Exchanging rings & pronouncement of marriage from Mrs. Candy Corn on Vimeo.

Our Candy Corny Lovefest: The Bachelorette Party (Rated PG-13 For Brief Chocolate Nudity)
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: Our Rehearsal Dinner (The Last Supper As A Single Lady!)
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: Bridal Bouffants and Blushing Bridesmaids and Boobie Grabbing! Oh, My!
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: The Girlies Get Gussied Up
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: The Girls Hitch A Ride In A Limo!
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: The Guys Get Ready At The Museum
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: Fun & Formal Shots Of The Gals
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: A Bridal Blunder Like No Other
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: The Opening Remarks & Sand Ceremony
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: “I Like You”
Our Candy Corny Lovefest: Saying “I Do”

All photos by the fantastic duo: Laura Kicey & Michael Alan Goldberg!!!