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Everyone knows about the stereotype of the crazy, controlling bride who dictates what her husband-to-be and best buds can and can’t do for his bachelor party. Apparently, even though our groomsmen know nothing else about wedding planning or traditions, even they know about this stereotype (either that, or they just think I’m nuts, which is also possible).
As it turns out, Mr. Star’s guys have been planning his bachelor party for some time now and Mr. Star told me the other day how humorous he found it that they were all taking such pains to keep any and every detail from my knowledge.
Even my brother has been sworn to secrecy under pain of death because of his relationship to me — and he agreed wholeheartedly!
The thing is, I don’t really care. True story. If Mr. Star wants to see a naked woman jump out a cake, he can be my guest. I’m fully confident in the fact that he doesn’t, but that’s an issue for him and his groomsmen to work out. 
I trust Mr. Star with my whole heart and believe that he would probably be willing to be involved in even less craziness than what I would deem to be perfectly acceptable. My ex-boyfriend and I once had a big fight over him possibly heading to a strip club, which I now think was a combination of my silliness and the fact that he didn’t make me have enough faith in us to not be worried about the rest. My trust in Mr. Star is a credit to how he treats me, because I am so totally secure in how head-over-heels in love with me he is that I’m completely unconcerned about what may or may not transpire at his bachelor party. Maybe that’s naive, but I don’t think so.
Are you worried about what your guy and his buddies might get into at his bachelor party or are you unconcerned?
I am just very relieved that the bestman is not into that stuff! So the party will probably be more golf/beer related than anything else.
I was not concerned. I trust my husband completely. They went out and had a good time at dinner and a hockey game.
Hear! Hear!
Not concerned one little ‘bit.
“I’m fully confident in the fact that he doesn’t, but that’s an issue for him and his groomsmen to work out.”
Exactly. =)
@Gerbera: Mr. Star’s oldest brother is most definitely into that kind of stuff and for all of our groomsmen, this will be their first time planning a bachelor party, so I think they’re getting geared up to go a little wild to celebrate. Mr. Star, on the other hand, wants something low-key and involving sports. We’ll see where that gets him lol.
Nah-if my fiance wants to pay for a lap dance that’s his problem but don’t complain to me about money when i come home with new shoes. He actually went to a strip club last weekend with his friends-He told me when I got home around 1AM-I was so NOT interested that I even suprised myself. I was just like “take a shower before you get into bed with me… and burn your jeans” lol.
I trust that my FH doesn’t want that anyway. It’s not him. He’s never been to a strip club, doesn’t want to ever go, and that’s a-okay with me.
In truth, if he DID want that, I think I would be a little hurt.
@Miss Star:
That’s the thing. I know weddings are suppose to be about US. But honestly, is it really? Same goes for bachelor/rette party. The FI would be much rather do a golf day and I keep pushing him to suggest that. But being the youngest one a “tradition” has already been foreset that he does not have the heart to break, even though it’s not what he really wants. It’s just not that big of a deal to us. The wedding day is more impt.
@Gerbera: Mr. Star’s already suggested a softball game several times and he’s been met with, “yeah, yeah…and AFTER that, we’ll…” We’ll see what happens.
I agree with flaming red- I hope he has a blast, whatever he does, just be sober and ready to go for the wedding. In fact, I could probably plan a raunchier party for him than his friends anyway- boys aren’t all that creative.
The one thing I have on my side is that his groomsmen live on other corners of the US. So my guess is after paying for transportation to get back over here they won’t have the funds for debauchery. I hope! Frankly I can’t get behind that business when it’s done in relation to a wedding especially when it’s not something they would normally do. I am much more fond of all day events that start out with golf, followed by a sporting event and finishing at the bar. It gives you more time to actually hang with the fellas anyway.
I’m completely secure in my relationship and myself that I will actually encourage the guys to have a stripper involved- it’s a bachelor party afterall, I think it’s to be expected. I know at my Fiances party there will be large quantities of alcohol, rowdyness, sillyness and probably boobies. My Fiance is a very trustworthy person, I’m not owrried at all. Now had you asked me that when I was younger or with a different guy the answer would have been that I was worried.
It us customary for the guys to all agree not to talk about or admit to the strippers, lap dances, etc. that happen at bachelor parties.
Star - I feel the same way as you about the cake lady. In my opinion, if it gets the group of 20 guys who traveled to New Orleans for his Bachelor party revved up and creates lasting hilarious memories for them all, the more power to them! My bachelor will have a HUGE group of guys pumped up to spend all their money on a destination bachelor party and go WILD. I think it’s exciting and kind of cute and I completely trust my little bachelor 
I was only concerned because the mister’s friends tend to want him to drink more than he usually does, and like to do really goofy antics that make me nervous for his safety — like picking him up all together to carry him around on their shoulders (but what if they drop him!?).
My fiance just left for Vegas yesterday for his bachelor party. It’s a joint party for him and his best friend who is getting married a few weeks after we are. I know there will be strip clubs involved - totally his buddies’ idea - my fiance says he hates strip clubs because he feels sorry for the strippers. In a way, it is a bit depressing. Anyway, it doesn’t bother me a bit. I totally trust him. I just want him to get home clean and in one piece!
My husband went bowling. He didn’t even want a bachelor party because he was afraid that there would be uncomfortable nakedness! Like you, Miss Star, I have complete and total faith in my husband–and always have even before we got married. The only girl he sees is me, everyone is is merely a person–not a possibly object of any sort of affection. It’s definitely one of his finer qualities
I’d say we’re lucky to so sure about our men!
I know they’ll have a good time no matter what. The only rules are: 1. Don’t get arrested, and 2. No cuts or bruises where the camera can see ‘em. Same goes for me
@Miss Bruschetta: Aww, Bru. Mr. Star’s guys encourage him to do all the same sorts of things. I get nervous when I have to sit there and watch it (eek!), but I think it’ll be easier for me to be at my Bachelorette at the same time and not worrying about him! Plus, I know he’ll have allll his guys there with him (even his dad!) and surely one of them will veto anything seriously dangerous or at least get him bandaged up before I see him, haha.
@pieceacake: We are definitely two lucky ladies
That is a great attitude to have!
Mr. Duff’s best man (his brother) actually ran his ideas by me to make sure that I was okay with what was going on. I thought that was really thoughtful of him, but like I told him, I don’t really care since I trust the whole group of them not to do anything too awful.
nope, not a single worry. that’s not his style anyway so if his friends planned a party like that, it would be for their benefit and not his. he’s always been clear about the woman who has his heart and attention. so party on boys!
Very well said, and exactly matches my views and my experiences. It’s like you channeled my brain or something!
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Mrs. Star, New York City Age and Occupation: 22, Actress Fiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Casting Assistant Wedding Date: October 2009 Venue: Ceremony: The Kraine Theatre, Reception: Midtown Loft & Terrace About Me: I’m a professional actress who’s always had New York City in her blood and I'm finally getting the chance to make a home in Manhattan with my fiancé, my dog, and my big dreams! I love polka dots, craft projects, Dunkin’ Donuts’ iced coffee, and anything sparkly. I’m having a blast planning our elegant/dramatic/New York City/acting-themed/largely-DIY wedding and am thrilled to be the youngest current Miss Blogger!
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