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In the spirit of going against tradition, my lovely bridesmaids will be choosing their own dresses. They are all beautiful and unique, and as my friends, deserve to shine independently by my side.
With this concept in mind, I spent a great deal of time looking for dresses in possible accent colours to inspire them on their quest, but soon realised that there were just two many hues and fabrics for this to all go wrong.
Whereas some shades work well together, others clash considerably. The thought of having to tell any of them that the outfit they chose isn’t suitable is something I just can’t bear to bring myself to do.
It is why I have selected a safer option. The girls will wear black, with accents of silver or white. The image above, found via sexyredframe, embodies what I have in mind. I hardly think you can go wrong with black and believe this will work well in the venue. While I am not even sure if all 5 of the girls would wear purple or yellow generally, which would defeat the point of allowing them to find their own dress that they could wear again, black can be paired with anything and should suit all their colour preferences.
Did your bridesmaids choose their own dresses? Do you have any tips for brides when letting their BMs choose their own dresses?
Black dresses are universally flattering — and provide a perfect “blank canvas” for flowers and accessories to really shine!
My bridesmaid choose their own dresses, I pick the color and material.
I’m letting my BMs chose their own black dresses, as well, with the only instruction being that they need to be knee- or tea-length. I’m supplying most of their accessories in the gifts I’m giving them, so their look will be softened with neutral colors and feather headbands. I hope that it ends up looking as good as it does in my head!
I let my BM choose any knee length black dress - with colorful shoes! They will def wear them again. Great option!
My bridesmaids are all picking their own dresses. The only thing I asked is that they be dark brown, but the style, fabric and length are all up to them.
Perfect… they’ll love you even more for it, to have something they select, useful for future soirees to bu sure!
I’ve been in two weddings this summer, both brides did the same thing, so I only had to buy one dress!!! Its definitely a dress I can wear again, I love my brides!
I had my BM choose black dresses from JCrew and I was really happy with that decision. I knew I didn’t want them in the same dress, but I wasn’t originally sure if I wanted to use different shades of one color or the same color. I’m really glad I went with black because it was flattering and all the gals can wear the dresses again.
Great choice!
I am letting my BM choose their own dresses. They can choose any dress in the shades of (davids bridal) watermelon or rose petal.
Great idea! Black always works well — there are just soooo many different styles and truly something for everyone.
I am also offering a unique dress for each girl, but the neutral will be shades of brown and sand. My friends are all very accommodating and selflessly pledge to wear WHATEVER I pick out (’except one of those cake dresses’ as my best friend noted — but later added ‘okay, well, even one of those dresses with the big skirts is fine, if that’s what you choose’. Awww.)
I’ve also spent a lot of time looking for dresses that both coordinate and will flatter each girl. FINALLY (two months prior to wedding time), we’ve collected three dresses in shades of brown.
They are basically simple in style. The fun part will be adding lace, sashes, brooches according to what will bring all the looks together, with accents of blue. I wish I had some photos already, because I’m anticipating a great time getting creative with each look to whip up something classic with vintage flair. Plus, I have a great seamstress that is going to help make this reality 
I gave my bridesmaids the choice of getting their own dresses and it turned out beautifully!!! I loved that they were mismatched but still in the same color family. I think it’s a wonderful trend. And my BMs can REALLY wear their dresses again.
It’s a fantastic idea! My wedding (1 month from TODAY!) colors are B&W, so I just asked they find knee-length, strapless black dresses. Two of my girls bought their dresses 6 months ago. One is searching (now frantically, because she’s a “unique” size), and one hasn’t even given the dress search a second thought. I finally went last night and put some dresses on hold for her to try on, but she’s still in no hurry to actually go to the store (she’s leaving later today for her vacation, which leaves now ONE free weekend that she could actually go shopping… we’re busy with stuff all weekends but one from now to the wedding date). So the “pick out your own dress!” idea is GREAT if your girls are actually motivated enough to do so.
My bridesmaids are all choosing their own black dresses. Two out of three of them rarely wear dresses at all, and two out of three of them have to fly across country for my wedding. I feel lucky just to have these girls involved in my day, and I didn’t want them to have to shell out umpteen amount of dollars just to stand with me in my wedding. Hopefully, they’ve all got black dresses in their closet already!
My BMs didn’t pick their own dress, but I was in a wedding where I got to pick my own black dress. I have worn it to 3 other wedding since
All the bride told us was that it needed to be black, tea length and made of a nice fabric (like not jersey knit).
When I saw that on redframe’s blog I began to wish I’d had black BM dresses too - but then I only had two ‘maids, so I felt they needed matching dresses and I wanted them in my dark red wedding colours. Oh, to have a do-over!
plus who doesn’t have or want a cute lil black dress on their closet 
I feel ya! I want my bridesmaids to feel special in their own right. They are each wonderful! But everyone I talk to (my mother, fmil….) all think I’m crazy because of the potential of the dresses clashing. I was thinking about getting paint swatches in the different hues of blue I like to give to the girls. But I just don’t know! I’m interested to see what ideas everyone else has!
I do want my bridesmaids to pick out there own dresses but then the overly anal part of me is like AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. The really one driving force I have is that two of the bridesmaid are about 5′10 and my MOH is 5′4 ish so there is no way they would all look good in the same dress.
O and I am the first to get married so I dont want any revenge later haha
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Mrs. Lightning, Cape Town Age and Occupation: 22, Journalist and Graphic Designer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 23, Computer Scientist Engagement Date: December 27, 2008 Wedding Date: September 2009 Venue: Hout Bay Manor About Me: I'm a young American living abroad in the beautiful city of Cape Town with a wonderful South African fiance and our crazy kitty Zeus. We're young, driven and madly in love. Together we're pursuing our wildest dreams including our biggest undertaking yet, a vintage retrospective wedding filled to the brim with DIY madness. I have an unnatural attraction to cake, a passion for blogging and a love of good design. While I might be an overly obsessive creative with too many ideas and nowhere to put them, Mr Lightning is my biggest fan and I can't wait to make my true love mine.
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