Wedding Blog
Alright hive, start buzzing, because I need some help. Mr. Ducky and I have been discussing what we want to do for readings during the ceremony. We will be meeting with our officiant (and close friend) tomorrow to talk about the ceremony. I wanted to find some readings in advance that we could think about.
We have 1 reading that will be very special. When I first moved to Orange County I started working with a 7-year-old autistic boy doing play therapy, social skills building and behavior intervention. The entire family has become family friends and the little boy (now 9) is my best buddy on Friday afternoons. He is constantly teaching me about joy and wonder in a way that only a child can. Well, for the wedding I have asked him to read something so that he can be a part of our day. I just am not sure what to have him read.
We will probably have 2-3 readings and I’d like to find something meaningful to put in our program booklet that we are creating.
Here are a few that I really liked while browsing the Weddingbee reading archives late last night.
Union by Robert Fulghum
You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes, to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making commitments in an informal way. All of those conversations that were held in a car, or over a meal, or during long walks – all those conversations that began with, “When we’re married”, and continued with “I will” and “you will” and “we will” – all those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” – and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding.
The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things that we’ve promised, and hoped, and dreamed – well, I meant it all, every word.”Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another – acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another these past few years. Shortly you shall say a few words that will take you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never quite be the same.
For after today you shall say to the world –
This is my husband. This is my wife.
Ruth 1:16 -
Entreat me not to leave you, or to return from following after you, For where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. And where you die, I will die and there I will be buried. May the Lord do with me and more if anything but death parts you from me.
Cheese talked about this verse a while back and I thought she phrased it beautifully. Ruth has always been one of my favorite books of the Bible.
I’d like to find something kind of light-hearted for our favorite 9-year-old reader. I’m not sure that this it, but I’d like to find something like it.
A Lovely Love Story by Edward Monkton
The fierce Dinosaur was trapped inside his cage of ice. Although it was cold he was happy in there. It was, after all, his cage.
Then along came the Lovely Other Dinosaur.
The Lovely Other Dinosaur melted the Dinosaur’s cage with kind words and loving thoughts.
I like this Dinosaur thought the Lovely Other Dinosaur.
Although he is fierce he is also tender and he is funny.
He is also quite clever though I will not tell him this for now.
I like this Lovely Other Dinosaur, thought the Dinosaur. She is beautiful and she is different and she smells so nice.
She is also a free spirit which is a quality I much admire in a dinosaur.
But he can be so distant and so peculiar at times, thought the Lovely Other Dinosaur.
He is also overly fond of things.
Are all Dinosaurs so overly fond of things?
But her mind skips from here to there so quickly thought the Dinosaur. She is also uncommonly keen on shopping.
Are all Lovely Other Dinosaurs so uncommonly keen on shopping?
I will forgive his peculiarity and his concern for things, thought the Lovely Other Dinosaur. For they are part of what makes him a richly charactered individual.
I will forgive her skipping mind and her fondness for shopping, thought the Dinosaur. For she fills our life with beautiful thoughts and wonderful surprises. Besides, I am not unkeen on shopping either.
Now the Dinosaur and the Lovely Other Dinosaur are old.
Look at them.
Together they stand on the hill telling each other stories and feeling the warmth of the sun on their backs.
And that, my friends, is how it is with love.
Let us all be Dinosaurs and Lovely Other Dinosaurs together.
For the sun is warm.
And the world is a beautiful place.
What readings are you doing for your ceremony? Have any readings stood out to you in weddings that you’ve attended?
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Share this post: Finding Meaningful Readings
There’s a children’s book called “I Like You” by Sandol Stoddard. It’s got some adorable, simple passages and talks about friendship and love in a light-hearted way. It might be worth a look for a child reader.
I think we are going to use “Union” and we may use Ruth 1:16. Very beautiful!
We’re using “I Like You” and Ruth 1;16… at least that’s the plan right now. 
Ooh, readings. Readings readings readings. Readings are hard. We have LOTS. Like, TONS.
We have not decided completely, mostly because we cannot decide on just three…or even four! =) We’re trying to find ways to squeak in extra readings (for example, we’ll have all the guests read a “well wishes” passage that we’ll print in the programs, and hopefully we can include some clips in other aspects of the ceremony), but we’re having a hard time figuring out which ones we want to have centre stage as “readings”.
We had a friend read Union at our ceremony. I love that reading!
There’s also a really sweet passage from The Velveteen Rabbit that speaks a lot about true love- you might want to check it out!
Check out this archive of readings: it’s pretty comprehensive! http://kvetch.indiebride.com/index.php?t=msg&th=2271&start=0&rid=0&S=2158b7874f2408cc6340d4e86cb7e151
Oh, and I think that dinosaur passage is incredibly adorable for a nine year old reader….too cute
We’re doing Union by Robert Fulghum, too! Mr. Lab and I just got to work on our ceremony today!
We used a reading from “Letters from Abigail Adams to her husband President John Adams”.
As a suggestion, it’s a good idea to keep it short for readers under the age of 12 - though the dinosaur reading is really sweet, it’s a little long for a nine-year-old to read - just something to keep in mind when choosing.
My family always has 1st Corinthians “Love is…” at our wedding, read by a family member. I’ll be asking my god-mother to read it at mine! Although the FI is not religious and we will not be having a religious ceremony, the tradition of this verse has seeped through to our wedding.
we are doing readings from the bible as our ceremony is in a catholic church. I can send you the reading options that our church gave us if you want to see them.
We’re using “Union” as well. That is SO cool that you’re having the little boy you worked with read something. I’m majoring in Applied Behavioral Science and I’ve always wanted to do behavioral intervention - I just haven’t been able to get it to work with my schedule yet.
The entire book might be a little long, because I think Gilneas is right about keeping a child’s reading short, but have you ever hear of the book “Hope for the Flowers” by Trina Paulus? It is a children’s book, and one of my favorites, and you might be able to grab a section of it that will work.
I’m a little surprised so many people use this passage from Ruth. In this passage, Ruth is not speaking to Boaz (her future husband), but instead is vowing to her mother-in-law, Naomi, that she will never abandon her. While a beautiful love story, this particular passage seems a bit humorous to read at your wedding when you apply the same context to modern day, wouldn’t you think? : )
I think the most appropriate reading for this young man is is a condensed version of “Guess How Much I Love You” by Sam McBratney:
“Little Nut Brown Hare,
Who was going to bed, held on tight to Big Nut Brown Hare’s very long ears.
He wanted to be sure that Big Nut Brown Hare was listening.
“Guess how much I love you,” he said.
“Oh I don’t think I could guess that,” said Big Nut Brown Hare
“I love you all the way down the lane as far as the river,” cried Little Nut Brown Hare.
“I love you across the river and over the hills,” said Big Nut Brown Hare
That’s very far, thought Little Nut Brown Hare.
He was almost too sleepy to think anymore.
Then he looked beyond the thorn bushes, out into the big dark night. Nothing could be farther than the sky.
“I love you right up to the moon,” he said and closed his eyes.
“Oh, that’s far,” said Big Nut Brown Hare.
He leaned over and kissed him goodnight.
Then he lay down and whispered with a smile, “I love you right up to the Moon~
And back.”
There is also a sweet reading from The Velveteen Rabbit that is nice for weddings:
“What is real?” asked the rabbit one day. “Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?” “Real isn’t how you are made,” said the skin horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you then you become real. It doesn’t happen all at once. You become. It takes a long time. Generally, by the time you are real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”
We had part of ‘Union’ and then ‘On Marriage’ from The Prophet by Khalil Gibran. It really describes us, and we love it, so did our guests!
How about something from the Little Prince for your 9 year-old reader? There are some really sweet passages! A lot of people like the part of the Velveteen Rabbit, too, where he talks about how being loved makes you real:
“What is REAL?” asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. “Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?”
“Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”
“Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit.
“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.”
“Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?”
“It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”
Good luck! Tell us what you pick :~)
We’re doing the Union reading, i really love that one.
We used the Union reading and I *loved* it. I read a lot of poems and a lot of them felt too dramatic or grandiose for us. That one really felt more like *us*. I’ll tell you what, I didn’t cry at the actual ceremony, but I did cry at the rehearsal when my best friend read that poem!
We had the lyrics to the Beatle’s, “In My Life,” read. It was also the processional that we used.
oh my goodness those are so lovely. i need to start thinking about readings as well… i love that you are having a young reader!
I’ve always loved “The Little Prince,” it holds a lot of meaning for me and the mister. Not sure if we could use it in the ceremony but it might be nice for a young person to read.
We are using Ruth 1:16 as well and also Colossians 3:12-15. It talks about clothing yourselves in mercy, kindness, humilty, gentleness and patience; forvigiveness; and love being the most important thing.
Thank you so much for posting about this! I need to get cracking on picking our readings :-0
I used 1 Corinthians 13 and 1 John 4:7-12 (a bit of a tongue twister, but such a powerful message about love). I also love Colossians 3:12-17 and the Union reading. It took a long time for me to pick my readings - in the end, choose whatever speaks to you and your fiance. And if you get a little teary-eyed everytime you read it - then you know it’s the right one!
i don’t know if you have reposted about what readings you are using yet (i’m catching up on weddingbee in chronological order)
but here is one that is cute and 9-year-old appropriate.
“It’s you I like”
From Mr. Rogers
It’s you I like,
It’s not the things you wear,
It’s not the way you do your hair–
But it’s you I like
The way you are right now,
The way down deep inside you–
Not the things that hide you,
Not your toys–
They’re just beside you.
But it’s you I like–
Every part of you,
Your skin, your eyes, your feelings
Whether old or new.
I hope that you’ll remember
Even when you’re feeling blue
That it’s you I like,
It’s you yourself,
It’s you, it’s you I like.
Pasted from
here is the link that didn’t paste into the first post:
http://pbskids.org/rogers/songlist/song5_ra.html
Oh so many good ideas - I didn’t know that Union was such a popular reading - wow!!!
[...] Duckling also highlighted “A Lovely Love Story” by Edward Monkton (read it here) and I instantly teared up when I read it. It’s funny and heartfelt. I replaced “I Like [...]
That dinosaur reading is so cute! And I second mrspaetz, portions of Khalil Gibran’s “The Prophet” would be lovely… I think there’s also a chapter on love.
I find the Apache Wedding Prayer to be beautiful, simple, and meaningful:
Now you will feel no rain,
For each of you will be shelter to the other.
Now you will feel no cold,
For each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now there is no more loneliness,
For each of you will be companion to the other.
Now you are two bodies,
But there is one life before you.
Go now to your dwelling place,
To enter into the days of your togetherness.
And may your days be good and long upon the earth.
Good luck!!
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Mrs. Duckling, San Diego
Age and Occupation: 23, Psychology Grad Student, Youth Diversion Specialist/Marriage and Family Therapy Trainee and an Executive Assistant
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Marketing and PR Coordinator
Engagement Date: May 17, 2008
Wedding Date: September 2009
Venue: Rancho Bernardo Inn
About Me: I'm currently living in Orange County, but planning our wedding in my hometown of San Diego. We are a DIY wedding "2fer", as I'm the crafty one and Mr. Ducky is in charge of all of our graphic design and technical aspects. When not wedding planning or reading wedding blogs, I'm attending grad school and rotating between two different jobs to keep things exciting. My favorite things include shoes, Post-Its, Labrador Retrievers, traveling, psychology, delicious food, photography, reading, craft gadgets/supplies, and of course, my wonderful Mr. Ducky!
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