Weddingbee Blog

When it came time to plan and write out our ceremony, Mr. D and I were considerably overwhelmed. After all, neither of us had any experience writing a marriage ceremony. After turning to the internet, we then turned to our officiant.

We’d been having a particularly difficult time when it came to wedding rituals. None of the ones we could find really spoke to us as a couple or fit with our ceremony. What if the wind blew out our unity candle? Or if our sand jar was misplaced, broken, or all mixed up during a move? What happens to the water after the water ceremony? What if I spilled wine/chocolate/other food on myself?

Then we started talking about planting ceremonies, which while great, also stumped (tee hee hee) us. We don’t really have anywhere permanent we plan on living for a while; certainly no place to plant a tree. Then we started talking about how much we both loved Austin (where we met) and the Southwest in general. When it hit us: we thought, ‘What if we plant a cactus?’

Sure, a prickly cactus at first glance might not seem the best symbol of a marriage, but if you’ve spent time around them you might see why I find them so impressive.

They can be used for food, medicine and shelter for small animals. They can be as delicate as they are hardy. And to replant one? Simply stick one on the ground and it will replant its roots whereever it falls. Since we’re nomadic, it seemed like the perfect choice.

We ordered a cactus (from Arizona) and I wrote the text for the ceremony. I sent this to our officiant and asked her if she could smooth it out and tweak it a bit.

Christiana and Nick will now take part in their cactus planting ceremony to symbolize the roots of their relationship, and the continued growth of their love as they become family to each other today. Unlike a tree, a cactus can be replanted over and over, without any true danger to the plant. Much like Nick and Christiana, they can spend a fair amount of time moving around while still strengthening their roots. Many of you know, Nick and Christiana met and fell in love in the Southwest, and this cactus will serve as a daily reminder of the beginnings of their relationship. As they provide the sun, soil, and water for this cactus, they will provide the encouragement, trust, and love needed on a daily basis to consciously nurture and nourish their connection to each other.

And she sent back this:

We will also be symbolizing the depth and meaning of this union today through a special ritual- unique to Christiana and Nick. The two of you will now take part in a cactus planting ceremony. As many of you know, Nick and Christiana met and fell in love in the Southwest, and this cactus will serve as a daily reminder of the beginnings of their relationship. It symbolizes the roots of their relationship, and the continued growth of their love as they become family to each other today. Unlike a tree, a cactus can be replanted over and over, without any true danger to the plant. Much like Nick and Christiana, who have spent a fair amount of time in their relationship being uprooted and moved around but growing stronger all the while.

Nick, please add the soil.
Christiana, please add the water.

And thus, we’ve made our own ritual (sorta). Woo hoo!

Have you created any rituals for your ceremony? What rituals did you incorporate, and why?