Weddingbee Blog

Um, that was not a typo. And, again, for those who missed it: we are not having a rehearsal. It made my muscles tense just to type that. But, I am forced to let it go. And here’s why.

Mr. CB is anti-wedding rehearsal. The one thing he’s been pulling for this entire time is not a playlist, a particular band, suit, or tie. It’s not an item on our menu or even a particular beer.

It’s that our wedding feel as organic as possible.

The last thing he wants is for the ceremony to feel like a production or a staged show. While I’ve never been to a wedding rehearsal, he’s been to many and, as someone who’s older and (okay, I’ll give it to him) wiser, he’s taking the final say on this one.

Yes, I see the merit in a rehearsal. It’s a chance for people to shake their nerves off, to run through everything just to have a general gist of how it’s going to play out. It’s not like everyone has blocking tape and scripted lines. But, no matter how much I try to gently cajole Mr. CB into feeling the same way, he doesn’t. He views them as a waste of time during which the bride stresses out and everyone stands around listening to her berate everyone. Man, he must’ve come across some bridezillas.

So, I’m gonna hand it to him:

The freedom to escape a 15-minute rehearsal. And, no, I’m not going to run through it with everyone without him there, either. (Even if I got extremely jealous of how well Mrs. Peep Toe’s went and would follow her instructions completely!)

Lucky for me, I have an aunt who is also into all-things-organic. She’s incredibly spiritual, a massage therapist, and great at making lemonade out of lemons. Her husband, my uncle, is officiating. So, of course, I mentioned to her that we weren’t going to have a rehearsal. She saw the sunny side of things and told me not to worry, that the ceremony will just be very raw and real. We won’t have been through it before so we are going to feel the transition of it all. And that’s a good thing. Because what we want is to really feel what we are doing—committing our lives to each other.

Am I worried a bridesmaid will walk the wrong way? That our transition from song to tradition will not run as smoothly? No. It might happen, and I’m okay with it. Partially because I’ll create a very thorough set of instructions for everyone, let people know beforehand who they are paired up with, and make sure our singers (my aunt and grandmother) know when they are singing. From there? I’ll let my uncle take the reins.

How do you feel about us not having a rehearsal? Do you see the value in a raw ceremony, or is a run-through a necessity?