Weddingbee Blog

Can we be real here? Like, really real? This post has to do with weight, and size, and wedding pressure to look completely perfect at all times.

When I bought my wedding gown, I was in the middle of a super workout frenzy. In my adult life, my weight has fluctuated a lot. On dress buying day, I weighed 155 lbs. I was doing pilates three times a week, running 3 times a week, doing the Shred and other cardio often, as well. My tummy was flat! I could run two miles without stopping (for someone who couldn’t even run half a mile in high school, this was an AWESOME accomplishment)! I felt amazing.

The day I went in for my first dress fitting, over five months later, I had gained ten pounds. As my day to day schedule got more hectic, I didn’t have as much time for exercising. As our wedding budget got bigger, I didn’t have as much money for private pilates and yoga classes. All of these little changes added up. And when I tried on my dress, it showed. The dress fit, but was tight in the thigh area, which happens to be my “problem area”. I have a 28 inch waist and 42 inch hips. It’s ridiculous! But, it’s just the way I am built, and no amount of cardio or weights or dieting will change that ratio. In fact, when I am on a workout kick, my waist gets smaller, yet my thighs get larger and more muscular!

Like I said, my dress was tight in the thighs. Tight enough, apparently, for the alterations person to tell me to stop eating for two weeks. To advise me to start the “walking diet” and walk away the fat on my thighs.

I would love to be telling you that this didn’t affect me. That I let the rude comments roll off my back. But it did affect me. I immediately hated what I saw in her mirror. I started berating myself for not spending the last eight months dieting, like “a good bride should”. I couldn’t believe I was going to be getting married looking like this. I was mad at myself. I was discouraged. I felt worthless.

In reality, I should have been mad at the seamstress!

Instead of doing the right thing and leaving her studio immediately, I let this woman make comments on my shape for the next 20 minutes while she pinned and cut and scrutinized. I smiled and nodded and promised to work on my weight…

I held myself together throughout the meeting and waited until I was safely in the car with Mr. S to get upset. I didn’t cry; I just felt sick to my stomach. My thoughts were erratic… Hhere we are, a month from my one and only wedding day and I didn’t starve myself for the past year to look perfect, and now I have to face the consequences by walking down the aisle in front of everyone with enormous thighs!!! OH NO!!!

It wasn’t until two days later that I realized how ridiculous I was being. I had let a silly comment from my seamstress take over my brain for a full 48 hours, and I had no reason to let this go on.

There is SO MUCH pressure for brides to look “perfect” on their wedding day. From the dress consultants who will ask, “How much weight are you planning on losing before the wedding?” to the magazines that advertise step by step “bridal diets”, the pressure to change your body for your wedding day is extreme.

And for two whole days, I got caught up in this mindset. I contemplated not eating, doing a fast, a cleanse, anything that would help me drop some weight. It is a crazy thing when someone makes you feel like you have lost control of your own body.

Here is the real deal, though. I already eat pretty healthy foods (okay, maybe my cupcake trials were catching up to me, but on a normal day to day basis, I eat well). I can’t really cut out any food without cutting out essential nutrients. I exercise pretty regularly, but I had let some of it go in the past few months. I vowed to not worry about it, work out when I can, but not be extreme about it, and buy a really good pair of Spanx to smooth out any lumps and bumps! I also vowed not to let any comments from someone who doesn’t even know anything about me other than my measurements affect my mindset.

Will I lose ten pounds in the next ten days? No. Will I look perfect for the wedding? Depends on your idea of perfect. Will Mr. Sprinkle tell me I look perfect? Yes, he always does. Will I believe him? I hope so! Luckily, my seamstress will be nowhere near our wedding, and I will be surrounded by people who love me exactly the way I am right now; not twenty pounds thinner, or two inches taller, or in a more expensive dress, or with whiter teeth, or tanner skin…

Have you felt the pressure to look perfect on your wedding day? How are you dealing with it?