Wedding Blog
Mr. Fro Yo and I started thinking about what we wanted for the ceremony and went through the logistics of what might be possible at an outdoor wedding. We liked the unity candle, but feared that wind would blow it out, so we moved on. We also liked the sand ceremony, but we would have to bring our own table to the ceremony, and that sounded like a lot of work (yes, apparently I’m that lazy). I researched a little more and found out about hand fasting.
Photo from Flickr
I’d never heard of this, but I was intrigued. It’s an ancient Celtic ceremony that is the inspiration behind today’s modern day expression of “tying the knot”.
(Image courtesy of Natalie Williams Photography)
The officiant or one of the members of your bridal party ties your wrists together, typically with cord, but some couples choose to do it with things that mean something to them (ribbon, etc.). This is to signify that you are bound together through life.
(Image courtesy of Natalie Williams Photography)
Some vows I’ve seen that accompany this part of the ceremony are:
These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you, that are holding your hands on your wedding day, as you promise to love and care for each other today, tomorrow and forever.
And
These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it, that will hold and comfort you when fear or grief confront you. These are the hands that will wipe away tears from your eyes, both tears of sorrow and – much more common I am certain – tears of joy.
So what do you think? Would you all be interested in seeing that? Has anyone seen this before?
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I love the idea of handfasting, but I have yet to see it at a wedding in my circle of friends. I think it’s a beautiful tradition, and I like the readings that you mentioned. Very sweet.
Miss Lab posted about this topic on Sunday and I bookmarked it! http://www.weddingbee.com/2009/09/13/official-business/
I love the idea, the symbolism as well as the beautiful words that go along with it. I saw one ceremony that used it, however it was an outdoor wedding with no microphone so I couldn’t hear what they were saying, just saw what they were doing 
we’re doing the “blessing of the hands” using the same reading but just holding hands and not actually fastening them together with anything.
I love it! I had just heard of it on here and think it is a different way to symbolize your unity!
i really like this idea, i’m definitely going to have to bookmark it for when we start to put together our ceremony.
I thought it was really sweet, and I like that you can pick a cord or some sort of material that means something to you.
I hadn’t heard of that, but I really like the idea! And you’re right that the unity candle and sand are both a little more complicated for an outdoor ceremony. We were trying to keep ours as simple and non-intrusive on the landscape as possible, I wish I had heard of this sooner!
My husband and I did an all-out 18th century Scottish wedding with a handfasting. We really liked the idea of the community blessing our marriage, so we asked the 6 people in our wedding party to come up with something to say that ended with a question for us. After answering the question, they tied a cord around our hands.
What they were going to say was a complete surprise to us and it turned out to be one of the most touching parts of our ceremony =)
Miss Hummingbird and Miss Cookie both used a similar ceremony
http://www.weddingbee.com/2008/06/10/a-hummingbird-handfasting/
http://www.weddingbee.com/2008/11/05/love-made-simple-ceremony/
I just saw it on an episode of “Amazing Wedding Cakes” at a Renaissance fair wedding. I guess that’s what I think of when I see it. I agree with Meg. I like the blessing, but I’d prefer (for myself) to do it just holding hands. The feminist side of me balks at the “bondage” impression of it.
I’ve never seen hand fasting done before, but I like the idea. I think we’re going the unity candle route.
I’ve only read about this, but I think it would be a really nice addition to the ceremony.
I am doing it!!! Mr. CC and I are having an outdoor ceremony and had the same issues! When we decided to do the hand fasting, we were all concerned that the family would think we were totally off the wall… but fortunately our officiant worked with us and we now have the most beautiful handfasting ceremony I could have imagined. So glad to see others doing this!!!
@Carrot Cake: I thought the same thing! But, I also thought it might be something our guests haven’t seen before and would be interesting for them. 
We did this at our ceremony because my husband is half Irish and it was nice and symbolic and definitely something most of our guests had never seen before. We used this particuar ceremony although I would read through and maybe edit the words a little bit because there is a section that says ‘May this knot remain tied for as long as your love shall last” but then the knot comes off less than a minute later.
We’re planning on doing this at our October wedding…but finding the material to do it with has definitely been harder than I had thought that it would be!
@abrideagain: Try looking in a Jo-Ann’s Fabrics; that’s where we got the cords for our ceremony.
We did a hand fasting! You can read about our ceremony here: http://www.weddingbee.com/2008/09/24/write-your-own-wedding-ceremony/ and see some pics here: http://www.weddingbee.com/2009/02/20/married-in-montana-our-wedding-ceremony-part-2-of-2/
I think it’s a really neat idea! One silly question though… when do you untie yourself? After the ceremony? Before you walk back up the aisle together? I can just imagine if I did the hand fasting, trying to turn around still attached to Jimmy and ending up in a tangled mess on the floor!
@jillianleigh: We had our officiant untie it after he was done with the reading.
I have seen a celtic hand tying ceremony, but the officiant asked both the bride and groom a series of 6 questions they went something like this Groom, Will you ever hurt bride? The groom answers with, “I may.” Then the officiant asked “Is this your intention?” and the groom answered “No.” Same question to the bride with the same answers. After each question the question was asked and answered by both the bride and groom the officiant tied a knot into the cord. It was really lovely. It looks like a version is located in this forum: http://www.brides.com/forums/planning-and-etiquette/thread.jspa?messageID=453759
@jillianleigh: I’ve heard about them slipping it off too because it isn’t tied too tight.
So many great traditions to choose from, this one seems very sweet.
i have never seen it in person though i’ve read many variations of the ceremony online
love this idea as I’m personally not a fan of the unity candle or sand traditions!
I’ve never seen this done before either… but it is a beautiful sentiment & tradition.
Our officiant transitioned from the handfasting to the ring exchange by explaining that the rings represented the promises that we’d made to our community along with the personal vows we were about to share with eachother. He slipped off the cords so we could exchange vows and rings. It worked pretty well!
I love the idea of this. I’m unsure of the symbolism of immediately untying the knot after the reading, though. Has anyone seen a ceremony where the couple kept the knot tied and did something with the knotted cord afterward? Say, put it on display somewhere, kept it on for the rest of the ceremony, etc.?
@KateL: We plan to just slip the cords off and keep them in our house afterward. I’m not sure where just yet, but that’s definitely something we want to do.
@Miss Frozen Yogurt: In thinking of my own ceremony, I’ve considered hanging it either above the bed or on the wall above the kitchen table.
@KateL: Ours are still knotted and we hung them around the hilt of the sword my family gave my husband at the wedding. The plan is to mount them both on the wall, though we haven’t done that yet.
Ive seen that a lot and even tho I still dont know if we are doing it or not, I think is super sweet!
we used those words from ‘these hands’ that you listed above, but only with us holding each other’s hands, no cords involved.
we did, however, get our guests to also take the hands of their partner/friend if they wanted. it was touching to see that it was meaningful for them too!
We’re planning on doing a handfasting with our non-religious ceremony.
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Miss Frozen Yogurt, Dallas
Age and Occupation: 28, Special Projects Coordinator
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Equity Trader
Engagement Date: March 19, 2009
Wedding Date: April 2010
Venue: Marie Gabrielle, Dallas
About Me: I was born and raised in Texas, and have lived in several of the cities across the state, but I currently reside in Austin. I went to college in Boston and have a special place in my heart for the Northeast. I love reading, shopping, wine, reuniting with college friends that are scattered across the country, reality TV, trying out new recipes, and attempting all the DIY projects that come along with wedding planning. I'm a "bleeding heart, save the world type" and thankfully my job allows me to work on legislation and policy to help out those in need. I met Mr. Frozen Yogurt in a bar, though he doesn't even drink! And now we are planning a modern yet vintage wedding in Dallas while dealing with the trials and tribulations of first time homeownership.
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