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Miss Lamb, Norfolk Age and Occupation: 25, Homeland Security Consultant Fiance's Age and Occupation: 27, Graduate Student Engagement Date: January 2009 Wedding Date: January 2010 Venue: Trinity Presbyterian Church/Harrison Opera House About Me: I’m a Homeland Security Consultant with a tendency towards pulling office pranks, taking lunch breaks, and drinking Wawa shakes. I’m also an English major with a serious obsession with alliteration and rhymes. While I’m not keeping America safe, I’m training for half marathons and the Escape from Alcatraz swim. Or moving for the third time this year. Or baking. Or wedding crafting. Or crying about wedding planning. All the while, I’m getting myself into Lucille Ball-esque scrapes and making Jim Carey-esque faces. Our big fat Czech/Baptist/Jewish/Italian wedding is a combination of vintage eclectic, DIY, and little spoonful of sugar from our Event Coordinator. It’s going to be a Norfolk flavored wedding with the verve of an only-daughter-blow-out bash!
About Miss Lamb

My Own J.Lo

September 18th, 2009 @ 11:59 am by Miss Lamb

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Well, hopefully my coordinator isn’t going to run off with my groom… but I’m very excited that we decided to hire an event designer/wedding coordinator!

Early in the process, we knew that we at least wanted “day of” coordinating services. My parents did not want to be worrying about the processional, paying the DJ, or putting out favors while their guests were left to fend for themselves. Deciding on the right company and the right package was much harder than I thought, though.

I began my search with these considerations in mind:

  1. I would most likely be an out of town bride.
  2. I work full time, am getting my master’s part time, and am very involved at my church.
  3. The future Mr. Lamb is starting graduate work in the fall.
  4. My mom and I need an objective 3rd party to steer us right.

I looked through Wedding Wire to find planners located near my hometown. I chose several that seemed to match my philosophy and aesthetic. I also scoured local web-boards at The Knot and Craigslist. I contacted a total of 5 coordinators after my initial research. Out of the 5, only 1 contacted me within 24 hours. Then 3 more contacted me within 4 days and the last one never contacted me.

My decision on which coordinator to hire basically came down to the person that I liked talking to on the phone the most. If I’m going to be working with someone for a year on an event, I want to be comfortable with the person and feel like they really listen to me. As a professional consultant, I know that my clients look for these attributes. I love the fact that I get to be the client this time! Our event designer immediately returned phone calls and emails. I also knew that the persistence she showed in booking my account would be the same persistence that she would use to keep all of the vendors in check! At that point, we got the event planner, but which package would we choose?

The coordinators that I researched all basically showed three basic packages (with a la carte additions, of course!).

  1. “Day of” - Usually complete wedding day coordination with a limited number of hours to consult with the bride and be present at the rehearsal.
  2. “Partial” - “Day of” coordination with some understanding of a limited number of hours or responsibilities.
  3. “Full” - the soup to nuts of wedding coordinating.

I got a really big kick out of how many coordinators named these packages kitschy names that went along with their business name. The whole Silver, Gold, Platinum was overused, and some were so funny because they were pretty forced. Without giving too much away and embarrassing hometown vendors, I’ll give you an example. I contacted, “Flower Wedding Coordinators” and their package names were, “Lily”, “Rose”, and “Orchid”.

Once I had chosen our coordinator (who I’ll call Miss P from now on), we reviewed the packages in detail. My parents, the future Mr. Lamb, and I read the services and compared them vigorously. We found ourselves debating between Partial and Full planning. Since we hadn’t booked a venue yet, most of our discussions revolved around the need to hire a full wedding coordinator if our potential venue would provide one as well. My dad referred to this as “paying for the same service twice”. I saw it from a different perspective. I saw the wedding coordinator as acting as owner representatives. Yes, the venue may have a coordinator, but she’s working for the venue, while our coordinator is working for us. I don’t want their coordinator having to involve us in decisions like where the presents should go after the reception – cue our coordinator!

The argument for the Partial package: My mom and I are very detailed oriented people and do event planning for our livings. My mom and I like being in charge. The cost was lower for the package. Ease of coordination so that no service was “paid for twice”.

The argument for the Full package: My mom and I have full time jobs. Everyone involved in planning was definitively not excited to do many aspects of the planning (haggling with vendors, for example). With the venue still TBD, we have to deal with an out of town (OOT) wedding, and the research would be very time consuming.

After some heated arguments, some tears, and a plan to move forward with kindness and renewed respect for all parties involved, we signed a contract for Full planning services. It helped so much. Searching for churches near a candidate reception venue? Miss P! Calling references for another venue? Miss P! Keeping track of the budget? Miss P!

Love it! And I always, always think of Franck when I tell people we hired a coordinator - I can’t wait to pick out a kheck!

Did you hire a full-service wedding planner? What were the pros and cons of hiring him/her?

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22 Responses to “My Own J.Lo”

1.
LatteLove
Hostess
LatteLove (message)  4,094 posts, Honey bee

A kheck! [I might have hired a coordinator if I could've found one like Franc.]

Kudos to you for making such a big decision! Did you have a hard time letting go of some of the details that are no longer your ‘responsibility’. Do you think you will in the future?

 
2.
Guest Icon
Guest
Heather

Thanks for explaining the various levels of coordination! I’ve been very hands on, very DIY-crafty, and have lots of free time (surprisingly), so I really want to do it myself. However, since it is so DIY, in my sister’s backyard, my family and I were concerned that we might be overwhelmed day of with small details. Like who cuts the cake, who answers the door, talks to the caterers, etc. etc. So…I’m going with a partial day-of coordinator. That’ll work with our budget but is still an indulgence! How fun!

 
3.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Bruschetta (message)  5,553 posts, Bee Keeper

LOL @ “kheck.” ;-) We didn’t do a “full” planner, but our DOC was a lifesaver in the weeks leading up to the wedding — and on the day-of, too, of course!

 
4.
Member Icon
Member
MissGoodie (message)  53 posts, Worker bee

We debated between the full and partial package as well. I work mostly from home and we have a long engagement (2.5 years) so I do have the time to do it all myself but the more I thought about it the more I realized that I didn`t WANT to do it all by myself. We ended up going with the full package and I`m so glad we did. I get to do all the fun DIY projects still but for the rest I just show up to meetings and sign on the dotted line, I don`t have to spend hours hunting down vendors, making meetings, and crunching numbers for our budget. I highly recommend the full package, it totally pays for itself.

 
5.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Lamb (message)  461 posts, Helper bee

@LatteLove: I’ll definitely be blogging about my relationship with my planner in future posts. I will tell you now though that it’s been a huge relief to hand a lot of the details over to her!

 
6.
SweetLemon
Member
SweetLemon (message)  54 posts, Worker bee

Congrats on getting some major help and I look forward to hearing about how this evolves. :-)

 
7.
bunny
Bee
bunny (message)  533 posts, Busy bee

Love Franck. Srsly. That movie rocks my face off.

 
8.
Dragonsus
Member
Dragonsus (message)  125 posts, Blushing bee

There wasn’t a question for me - I got a full service wedding coordinator. I’m 400 miles from where I’m getting married, and I have no family there. My future MIL is wonderful, but I can’t bring myself to use all her free time to do my errands. So we hired the lovely ladies at C&D events in Raleigh. Their prices were reasonable and they have been great at narrowing down vendors within out budget so that when I can come into town, I only have to meet with a few people rather than trying to cram 10 people into one Saturday. They will be coordination everything on the day and it is such a load off my mind. (i’m also a full time student and my Fiance has a full time job as do my parents.) Plus, I am NOT CRAFTY at all!! so they can help with that as well.

 
9.
IA_Snowflake
Member
IA_Snowflake (message)  1,608 posts, Bumble bee

We hired a full service coordinator. I had the same problem as you, I’m a total planner and I’m also a control freak. My coordinator and I had a lot of problems with each other. In the end she came through and pulled off the day, but I really wish i would have interviewed more people to find someone as anal as I am.

 
10.
Member Icon
Member
jhguba (message)  239 posts, Helper bee

Father of the Bride is one of my favorites! “Was he going to coordinate our wedding with subtitles?”

 
11.
lalalandTN
Member
lalalandTN (message)  91 posts, Worker bee

I love FRAHNK!!!

 
12.
pvaulter718
Member
pvaulter718 (message)  1,581 posts, Bumble bee

It’s good to know that this decision is as hard for other brides as it was for me! I ended up going with a DOC+. She did full Day Of duties, as well as participating with the rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, and as I found, virtually unlimited emails and phone calls! I think I got more than I paid for, but it was great!

 
13.
BeachyBride2010
Member
BeachyBride2010 (message)  314 posts, Helper bee

BEST movie ever… well, in my top 10 at least! (Showing my age, I know…)

 
14.
RecessionistaBride
Member
RecessionistaBride (message)  3,104 posts, Sugar bee

I’m going to hire a DOC but not a wedding planner…
@Beachybride: hey I love that movie & I’m 23!!

 
15.
Mochacoca
Member
Mochacoca (message)  38 posts, Newbee

I too ended up getting a full time wedding planner/coordinator because I will in Afghanistan for six months starting Jan. In addition the wedding is in California not DC which is where I live. It only makes sense for my sanity to hire someone full time. I basically used the same method you did except I didn’t have my parent’s input. I am still doing a lot myself such as the favors, invites , and all that jazz.

 
16.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Lamb (message)  461 posts, Helper bee

Lamb Dad’s favorite line is: “I want the chipper chicken!”

@Mochacoca: Godspeed to you! Enjoy having the planner - it’ll be such a relief for you!

 
17.
tea
Member
tea (message)  2,610 posts, Sugar bee

i thought about it before but once i go my feet wet helping my bestie plan her wedding. in fact, her dad nicknamed me j.lo! lol. i think i’m good to go for our future wedding planning. definitely want a doc though since i don’t to think about anything BUT having fun on the wedding day.

 
18.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Moonbeam (message)  1,328 posts, Bumble bee

Really need to look into a DOC, but venues and catering came together reallly quickly and a planner really wasn’t necesary. You are one busy gal.

 
19.
Member Icon
Member
lkbphmd (message)  179 posts, Blushing bee

I hired a full planner as I live over 400 miles from the wedding location. What I wish I would have done is really done my homework. The reason? I found out she posted on the knot looking for vendor suggestions for my wedding. Figured out after every other post is about this wonderful wedding planner she hired. After some in depth time with google, I found out she hadn’t lived in the area for years, as her wedding planning stories suggested but she had actually moved into the area recently. So my bad for not doing the homework I should have done. So far, I could have done everything she’s done for free. Plus she isn’t detail oriented and several of my questions, requests have gone unanswered. But I’m so non confrontational, I would really have to work up some nerve to say anything. But don’t think I don’t blame myself for where I am today. Don’t do your homework and you will pay….so take my advice, really check out the person you are considering. Personality isn’t everything!

 
20.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Lamb (message)  461 posts, Helper bee

@tea: @Miss Moonbeam: A DOC is a perfect choice if you’ve already booked a lot of your vendors and just need someone to run logistics for you that day. Good luck! :)
@lkbphmd: I totally agree with you! Checking out the background of the planner is a really good idea. My planner was a full time event designer in DC prior to taking the plunge and starting her own wedding business :)

 
21.
ColorCoated
Member
ColorCoated (message)  951 posts, Busy bee

I think a DOC is a good idea. I don’t know if we’ll get one though.

 
22.
Miss Poodle
Bee
Miss Poodle (message)  3,015 posts, Sugar bee

ohh I would love to have a DOC hehe

 


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Miss Lamb
Miss Lamb Miss Lamb, Norfolk Age and Occupation: 25, Homeland Security Consultant Fiance's Age and Occupation: 27, Graduate Student Engagement Date: January 2009 Wedding Date: January 2010 Venue: Trinity Presbyterian Church/Harrison Opera House About Me: I’m a Homeland Security Consultant with a tendency towards pulling office pranks, taking lunch breaks, and drinking Wawa shakes. I’m also an English major with a serious obsession with alliteration and rhymes. While I’m not keeping America safe, I’m training for half marathons and the Escape from Alcatraz swim. Or moving for the third time this year. Or baking. Or wedding crafting. Or crying about wedding planning. All the while, I’m getting myself into Lucille Ball-esque scrapes and making Jim Carey-esque faces. Our big fat Czech/Baptist/Jewish/Italian wedding is a combination of vintage eclectic, DIY, and little spoonful of sugar from our Event Coordinator. It’s going to be a Norfolk flavored wedding with the verve of an only-daughter-blow-out bash!
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