Wedding Blog
Sometimes, I’m a little self-conscious when I wear high heels. My Lambers loves me in heels, and thinks flats look a little like “grandma shoes”. I too love heels, but I also soar to 5’10″ or above when I slip them on. J-Ram? He rocks me hanging off his arm in my high heel glory like sane Tom Cruise used to rock the less Botoxed version of Nicole Kidman. Me, I avoid pictures standing on the same level and prefer taking pics when I’m standing a step below him. Yikes!
This has led to an interesting debate in my head. Should I boost my confidence and own my height by wearing heels? Or should I find a lovely pair of flats and be comfortable (mentally and physically)?
Here are some of the flat options that I have been scouring on the internet:
These babies will keep my tootsies toasty - but will not be good for walking outdoors. They’ll be comfortable for dancing, but maybe not as picturesque.
The Jeffrey Campbell Pearl Flat
In ivory, the cutie-petooties just might bring together style and functionality. But will Lambers think I look like I’m on my way to the retirement home?
I love the peep toe and jewel ornamentation… but I’m not loving the scrunchy look. I suppose on my feet, they’ll appear flat, though.
Ruby and Bloom Grace Ballerina Flat
I always wanted to be a ballerina - and with a little touch of vintage clip on earrings… eh? I see the potential.
Naturalizer’s Verdum Peep Toe Flats
Similar to the Herlene, but less scrunchy and no bling. I think these would be a statement that the shoes just weren’t that important to me, which might be the statement I want to make, but I’m not sure.
These are some of the heel options that have caught my eye. I found most of the options on eBay since it was so easy to narrow down the size, color, and designer - bonus points, there are some great deals!
Kate Spade Gold Gwen Slingbacks
I’m not crazy about them, but with the designer construction, they should be more comfortable than most high heels. It’s a clean and polished look.
Peepety peep toes! How stinkin’ cute are the bows? And gotta love not having to pay J.Crew prices.
More like Plain Janes… but I could spruce these bad boys up with a feather and shoe clip, no? They also just look comfy for a high heel.
Notice how I keep going back to comfort? Maybe I should go with the slippers! Anyone wear slippers as their wedding shoe? Did you regret not having a formal pair of shoes?
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It makes me giggle that you say “soar to 5′10″ or above.” I’m 6′3″ in bare feets! :p
I’m planning on going with some cute, colorful, pointy, flat Manolos. That is, if he decides to make some for this spring. I should have bought the ones from last spring. *le sigh*
I say go with the heels, personally! I’d love to wear heels on my wedding day, but my fiance is the same height as I am, (well, 1/2″ taller), and I don’t want to be taller than him in pictures. He loves it when I’m 6′7″ in heels though. Must be a German thing. :p
Would you consider kitten heels? A little height — but not too much? — and still pretty comfy?
I love the J. Crew Daniela the most. The bows are so sweet, they would look great peeking out from under a wedding dress. 
The Jeffery Campbell shoes are my faavorite! They’re so, so cute.
cute! I’ll be wearing thick flip flops that I wore to senior ball 4 years ago!
@fiftyfootbride: Hahaha, I thought about you actually when I posted this! My brother’s gf is 5′11″ so I feel like a shorty next to her. I’m in the same boat as you though, if I wear heels, I’ll be taller than Lamma-Ramma in the pics . . .
I’m with Dachshund on this one…in fact, I had to go see where I could get them…the Jeffery Campbell flats–LOVE LOVE LOVE. I think you would look gorgeous in any of them! Too funny you brought up this topic–I’m struggling with the same kinda deal…I’m 5′8, he’s 6′. He loves the sexy heels, I like the “less apt to break an ankle while attempting the chicken dance” flats, with the added benefit of not sinking 2 inches every time I take a step on the lawn AND feeling petite (NOT a word any sane person would use to describe me) next to my hunka-burnin’-love. Fifty Foot Bride–you crack me up! Can’t wait to see what you choose Lambkins!
Mmm… I cannot imagine myself getting married in flats to be honest. I vote do what I am doing: get some heels for the ceremony and flatties for the reception. Everyone is happy (except maybe your bank account).
No Isotoners (um… they are ISOTONERS). Love the Jeffrey Campbells, the Kate Spades and always a fan of Jcrew.
Soar to 5′10″ in heels? Then for goodness sake, wear the heels! You’re not tall enough to feel self-conscious in them. 
Oh! I should clarify - I’m 5′8″, so add an inch with each inch of heel - if I wore what I wanted, some 4 inchers, I’d be 6′. The 5′10″ is with kitten heels. The Lambster is 5′9″. To me, it’s soaring because if I kissed him straight on, I’d be kissing his forehead. LOL.
A good friend of mine wore white ballet slippers on her wedding day and said it was the best decision she ever made I would have done the same if I wasn’t so short and didn’t have a love affair w/ heels
Wear the heels if that’s what he likes, and you like ‘em too. I’m 5′10″ barefoot - and Mr. MJ likes me in heels! I wore 3.5″ ones for our wedding (he’s 6′ tall). Your photog can do creative angles to mask the height difference.
@Mrs. French Bulldog: so did a friend of mine! she loved them. and since her dress was long, no one knew until she hiked up her skirt to give us a look.
i think if you get nice looking flats, even lambers can’t say they look grandmaish!
I love the idea of peep toe flats but the ones that scrunch on the back ALWAYS end up giving me blisters!
I think there are some J Crew flats that look like the Daniella D’Orsay!
If you end up going with the Kate Spades, go to a retail place to try them on first. While I LOVE Kate’s designs, often the placement of her heels throws me off balance. It’s a personal thing, but obviously you need to be comfortable on your wedding day.
I’m almost 5′10, the mister is about 5′11.. so I will definately be doin the flats!
Yeah, I’m a little over 5′10″ au naturel, so I’m biased toward flats, I love the Jeffrey Campbell flats.
I am taller than my fiance before shoes (I’m 5′9″ and he’s 5′6″) so I would definitely feel like a giant if I wore heels. I have been seeking out cute flats since I got engaged and have had no luck so far.
I considered the Jeffrey Campbell flats too, but in pink, and while they were cute online, in person I thought they looked kind of silly, not elegant and fun like they do online.
Also, a word about ballet slippers: be careful if you plan on wearing them outside at all. Most will soak up water. We used to do outdoor dance shows sometimes and if the ground was wet at all our feet got all wet and gross.
O would wear kitten heels for the ceremony (i love the j.crew d’orsays!) and some inexpensive comfy flats for the reception. cute inspiration!
I’m 5′6″ and about 1/2 inch taller than FI. he loves when I wear heels, too, but I really don’t want to tower over him on my wedding day. I’ll probably be looking for something flat. I really like the Jeffrey Campbells!
I’m wearing the Campbell pearl flats - and let me tell you, they are MEGA when peeking out from underneath my dress.
They’re so delicious.
Not gramma-y at all.
Of course, I tend to rock some pretty solidly awesome shoes on a regular basis, so my slightly different taste might not be for everyone…
I think it all depends on the dress. I’ll be a SDB - so I need a killer set of heels - but I say, if you can’t actually seem them then it’s comfort all the way!!
Have you checked out Miu Miu flats? They’re a bit on the pricey side, but can definitely be worn time and time again. My favorites are these (http://www.barneys.com/Studded%20Bow%20Ballet%20Flat/500139920,default,pd.html); it even has a little something blue!
I’m taller than my finace without shoes. I found some great flats by Shannon Brit that I absolutely love! they are ivory with feathers on the toe. she also makes heels that are similar. Check them out!
I would second Mrs. Bruschetta and say look for kitten heels - they are SO cute AND comfy! (I wear them for work all the time because I do a lot of walking.) That said, I was LOVING those peep toe flats until I saw the Kate Spades… then I couldn’t see anything else. LOL
I will never understand why so many women have such an issue with being tall.
I love the Kate Spade slingbacks! I agree with everyone who said the others seemed to disappear when they saw those lovelies.
If you’re worried about your photos looking awkward, find a place where there’s a curb or stairs as a backdrop. Chances are good that your posture will look better in heels, even if a few people notice that you seem taller.
If it’s about personal comfort as far as walking in the heels (and I know I’m not very comfortable walking in them, either, but I sucked it up for the sake of photos and killer calves on my wedding day), then buy a comfy pair and start practicing! Plenty of clumsy girls learn to walk gracefully in a very short period of time, once they actually try. Just watch any season of America’s Next Top Model (and you actually might pick up some good tips for your own walk!).
I say go with a shoe you’ll feel comfortable and pretty in
Definitely go with heels! Even if you choose a low heel–it’ll feel more stylish and special.
I love the Pearl flats! I want a pair… I’m pretty tall too & I’m taller than my FI when I wear heels. Thanks for the inspiration
I am 5′11″ and my husband is 6′, so I went with flats. I bought Benjamin Adams’ Renee flats from My Glass Slipper- and I loved them, they were so comfortable!
Let me just say, I feel your pain! I’m 5′6 1/2 and FI is 5′9. It’s not that you or I would be extremely tall in heels, it’s the fact that you want to feel tiny and taken care of by your FI and on the most importatnt day of your lives you don’t want to be bending down to kiss him!
With that being said…I actually purchased the Jeffrey Campbell flats that you have pictured and love them! I should also add that I’m absolutely obsessed with heels and have a closet comprable to Carrie Bradshaw to prove it (literally)! This was one of the most agonizing decisions for me - vanity for shoes or vanity for height. I chose 2 inch satin d’orsy pumps for the ceremony (so I will walk taller and not shuffle as everyone watches) and the J.C. flats for the reception. I plan to indulge in whatever heels I want for my bridal portriats!!! Good luck!
I would go with kitten heels. I’m definitely way over six foot in heels, so it makes me chuckle when you’re worried about five ten!
The Jeffrey Campbells are adorable in person! I wasn’t sure how’d they look under the dress, but I highly recommend them for the ladies looking for flats!
It’s nice to hear what other brides have to say about this situation. I always dreamed of wearing beautiful 3-4″ heels for my wedding. But I’m almost 5′10″ and my fiance is 5′5.” I think I have to wear flats because if I wear heels, I’m over 6″ and he’s still only 5′6″ (with normal shoes). We even looked into getting him some shoes with lifts (elevator shoes), but those are a little weird and don’t look completely natural…so I think I have to go with comfortable ballerina shoes. At least my feet will thank me.
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Miss Lamb, Norfolk
Age and Occupation: 25, Homeland Security Consultant
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 27, Graduate Student
Engagement Date: January 2009
Wedding Date: January 2010
Venue: Trinity Presbyterian Church/Harrison Opera House
About Me: I’m a Homeland Security Consultant with a tendency towards pulling office pranks, taking lunch breaks, and drinking Wawa shakes. I’m also an English major with a serious obsession with alliteration and rhymes. While I’m not keeping America safe, I’m training for half marathons and the Escape from Alcatraz swim. Or moving for the third time this year. Or baking. Or wedding crafting. Or crying about wedding planning. All the while, I’m getting myself into Lucille Ball-esque scrapes and making Jim Carey-esque faces. Our big fat Czech/Baptist/Jewish/Italian wedding is a combination of vintage eclectic, DIY, and little spoonful of sugar from our Event Coordinator. It’s going to be a Norfolk flavored wedding with the verve of an only-daughter-blow-out bash!
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