Weddingbee Blog

This has definitely been the hardest young-ish bride post for me to write because it’s not something that I usually like to admit to. Well, not to anyone except Mr. Star.

Many times during this nearly two-year process of engagement, I’ve gotten nervous or stressed or anxious or scared about [insert ridiculous wedding detail / legitimate marriage anxiety / partially unresolved divorced parents issue here].

(Photo Credit)

A lot of times I get super duper nervous, like Mrs. Cheese. I also worry about all the details like Mrs. Powder Puff. Sometimes, I just get those normal bridal butterflies. No matter what, I feel like I have to hide it.

Why is that? I have a loving family and wonderful friends with whom I talk about nearly everything. So why would this be any different?

I think the answer is somehow twisted up in the fact that I’m a young-ish bride. Along the way, we’ve met with some reticence about us getting married so young from family, friends, and acquaintances alike, which has caused me to feel throughout our engagement that I needed to be proving why we were doing this and how strong a couple we are together.

I’m probably not alone in being a young-ish bride who feels the need to constantly keep up a brave front about my wedding nerves for the sake of calming the nerves of those around me who are worried about my young age.

The thing is, I think wedding nerves are pretty healthy, actually. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about “should I call off the wedding or not?” type nerves. I’m talking about the earnest, heartfelt nerves that you get when you’re making any life-changing decision or starting off in a new life direction — the kind of nerves you get the night before you move into your first college dorm room, the kind of nerves you get when you break tradition and actually ask a guy out on a date, or the kind of nerves you get when you know you’re about to make the decision about the person who will be your partner for life, through thick and thin.

Nerves are normal and healthy for people who really think about the levity and depth of the decisions they’re making… or, at least they are for me. I’m once again lucky to have Mr. Star, who makes me feel totally comfortable in telling him when I’m feeling nervous and is understanding enough to know that it has nothing to do with him or us, it’s just something that I’m going through because my life is changing forever.

I’m done trying to hide it from other people, though. I’ve decided to tell people when I’m feeling nervous.

Person: “So, big day is coming up — you getting nervous yet?”
Me: “Yeah, actually, I am a bit nervous, but I think that’s normal. I’m also super excited!”

Have you felt like you had to conceal your wedding nerves and pretend to always be a calm bride (young-ish and not so young-ish brides alike!)?