Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Spaniel
more by Mrs. Spaniel (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Spaniel
Mrs. Spaniel's Picture
Mrs. Spaniel, Los Angeles Age and Occupation: 28, Law Student Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Psychologist Wedding Date: March 2010 Venue: Calamigos Ranch About Me: I'm a third-year law student trying to balance graduating with starting my career, keeping up a relationship, and, oh yeah, planning an Old World, multi-cultural, "mountain lodge" wedding for 180 guests! A South Asian Jewish girl getting ready to marry my handsome Catholic Dane, I'm hoping to blend our cultures in our wedding just a bit more gently than by providing samosas as appetizers and offering æbleskiver for dessert. (Although that would also be awesome.)
About Mrs. Spaniel

Buying an Engagement Ring

November 14th, 2009 @ 3:00 pm by Mrs. Spaniel

It’s not hard to find information on buying a diamond—most jewelers will be more than happy to tell you about the four “C”s, and you know your budget better than De Beers does (two months’ salary? Malarkey!).

But an engagement ring is more than just a diamond; it’s a piece of jewelry that most women will wear every day for the rest of their lives (or their marriages; you know, whatever). So the NUMBER ONE piece of advice I would give anyone who is looking to get a ring in the near future? ASK HER WHAT SHE WANTS.

(Ha, you thought I was going to say something about the significance of an engagement ring and the love that it symbolizes or something sappy like that? Bah. You obviously don’t know me very well. The ring means nothing more than how people react to it. It’s not a symbol of anything except the money you spent. So SPEND LESS!)

To save money on the ring, Mr. Spaniel and I tried a few different things. Maybe one of these will work for you!

Buying an Engagement Ring :  wedding rings Be1bdb1

source


First, we looked into a sapphire ring instead of a diamond (this one is from Brilliant Earth, a jeweler specializing in non-conflict diamonds and recycled metals based in San Francisco). Blue is my favorite color and sapphires are my birthstone, so it seemed like a viable option. It was important to me, though, to find a setting that could sit flush with the wedding band, and I didn’t find a sapphire ring that I liked that did that, so we decided to keep looking.

Once we decided on a diamond, Mr. Spaniel started planning to get me a solitaire ring, which would have offered some savings on the setting, at least. But I wanted something that offered a little more visual interest for the buck.So we kept looking.

Buying an Engagement Ring :  wedding rings Ritani

source

We also tried to save money on the ring by shopping around online. I had found a beautiful Ritani setting that I loved in a jewelry store, but I didn’t love the price—it was set with a 75 point stone, H color, and it was still $7,500! So I spent hours (months, really) shopping around online, trying to find (1) a lower retail price, (2) an online or out-of-state retailer who wouldn’t charge sales tax, and (3) a higher quality, less expensive diamond to set in the ring. I eventually found all three of those, but because the designer setting was so expensive, we just couldn’t find the ring for less than $8,000 (for a full carat), and that was more than we wanted to spend, especially for a piece of jewelry we’d never laid eyes on.

What ultimately saved Mr. Spaniel and me the most money, aside from skipping the “designer” band, was changing the shape of the diamond. Round cut diamonds lose more of the raw stone than any other shape, so a well-cut 1 carat diamond will cost much more than a less traditional shape cut from the same rough stone. Princess cut diamonds are very trendy and in-demand right now, so they also cost more than similar-sized diamonds in less common shapes. Reducing the size of the diamond from 1 carat to .9 carats also reduces the price, well beyond the 10% reduction in weight.

Buying an Engagement Ring :  wedding rings 1 Carat

source

We ended up getting a ring like this one (only, NOT two carats; image from Ring Envy): an oval cut, .91 carat center stone with .76 carats of tiny round cut diamonds surrounding the center stone and along the band. Because we went with a smaller center stone, we were able to get a much higher quality color and clarity, and because of the surrounding diamonds on the halo setting, it actually looks much bigger than it is. And because we had learned a lot about what we should look for in a diamond and what it should cost, and went to a local, family-owned shop, we were able to negotiate a great price on the ring.

Tags: rings |
advertisement below
Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Spaniel
more by Mrs. Spaniel (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Spaniel

25 Responses to “Buying an Engagement Ring”

1 2 

1.
Guest Icon
Guest
Jennifer

My fiance and I wanted a unique, pretty ring that meant something to us without costing an arm and a leg. We found a design we loved and rather than pay $5,000 for the setting alone (crazy!), we found a local jeweler who took our ideas and created a setting for us that cost a lot less. And since we saved so much money on the setting, my fiance surprised me with a bigger diamond than we originally looked at. Not only was it meaningful, one of a kind and gorgeous… he didn’t have to stress about the money aspect of it and just enjoyed getting engaged. If you don’t care about name brands and can find a good jeweler, definitely consider this option.

 
2.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Moonbeam (message)  1,732 posts, Bumble bee

Wow, you did your homework. Lovely choice on the shape and setting.

 
3.
peakay
Member
peakay (message)  71 posts, Worker bee

Hi Miss Spaniel! I loved your post because I, too, spent a lot of time with my fiance researching stones, settings and price. However, I am confused about your comment: “The ring means nothing more than how people react to it. It’s not a symbol of anything except the money you spent.” If this is the case, then why buy a ring in the first place? I loooooooooove my ring and I’m sure you wonderfully adore yours, too. So then, isn’t the ring truly a symbol of his love and committment to you? Or, have I misread what you meant? Thanks, Miss Spaniel!

 
4.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Trail Mix (message)  6,312 posts, Bee Keeper

mmmmmmm, I could stare at diamonds all day…Love your ring, I think halos are frickin’ to die for!

 
5.
Guest Icon
Guest
kathy

“The ring means nothing more than how people react to it.” Wow. I don’t consider myself sappy, but people’s reactions to my ring actually mean nothing to me. But to each their own.

 
6.
jeaninelovesyou
Member
jeaninelovesyou (message)  155 posts, Blushing bee

i love ovals! good choice :)

 
7.
Carebear0613
Member
Carebear0613 (message)  164 posts, Blushing bee

Your ring is gorgeous! I am full believer in doing your research and getting the best deal!

 
8.
LoriLori
Member
LoriLori (message)  727 posts, Busy bee

I get you Miss Spaniel! I totally love it when someone goes “Wow, that’s some ring!” LOL
;-)

 
9.
moderndaisy
Member
moderndaisy (message)  6,607 posts, Bee Keeper

I know my FH saved money by spending all of his budget on the stone instead of investing in a more expensive fancy setting. So it’s kind of the same concept of your search, but we went a different direction. He was very intent on the stone being very ’sparkly’ which I guess equates to an excellent cut, and a certain carat weight. We both agreed that in the future I could always have it re-set in something a bit fancier, but for now its a six-prong solitaire in white gold.

 
10.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Cola (message)  2,868 posts, Sugar bee

This is really good info! And awesome that you had enough knowledge to be able to negotiate for the right price.

 
11.
Member Icon
Member
KMSull (message)  6,442 posts, Bee Keeper

This is an excellent post! Thank you so much. We’re just getting started on the whole “buying an engagement ring” process and the boy is so freaked out! I’ll definintely have to forward this article to him. Thank you!

 
12.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Spaniel (message)  6,792 posts, Bee Keeper

@peakay & @kathy: I hope I didn’t offend with that statement! We didn’t get the ring to symbolize our commitment to each other–we had that long before the ring. Everyone feels differently, but for us it’s a signal more than a symbol: it says to other people that we’re engaged, but it doesn’t mean anything more than that. It’s just a pretty ring.

 
13.
Gator
Member
Gator (message)  607 posts, Busy bee

Miss Spaniel - I saw you were looking for conflict free rings early in the process, did that make an impact on your final decision? (Also, my ring is a sapphire!)

 
14.
Mrs. Mouse
Bee
Mrs. Mouse (message)  5,844 posts, Bee Keeper

I wish I had been this practical and methodical about finding a ring! It sounds like you guys got a great deal: now let’s see it!

 
15.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Cheeseburger (message)  1,020 posts, Bumble bee

so beautiful! I too have a halo ring and love it! awesome post

 
16.
coleyjean
Member
coleyjean (message)  64 posts, Worker bee

I agree with your statement that the ring is more a signal then a symbol. We’d lived together and planned to have children and get married long before I had a ring, but people (mostly married people) took us seriously as a couple only after I had a diamond. Silly, but that’s how it is.
By the way, that Ritani is my ring! I love it! Hubs definitely didn’t spend $7500 on it, though…

 
17.
pvaulter718
Member
pvaulter718 (message)  2,116 posts, Buzzing bee

When can we see your ring?? After all that research, I can only imagine how beautiful it is!!!

 
18.
Guest Icon
Guest
dandylyon

yess, I can’t wait to see it too!

miss spaniel, i’m going through the proccess myself, so this was super helpful. thank you, thank you. did the diamond you end up getting come with a grading report? i hear those are important too

 
19.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Spaniel (message)  6,792 posts, Bee Keeper

@pvaulter718: I’m working on that post! It’s pretty tough to photograph!
@dandylyon: Glad it helped. :) I originally wrote about this process for a personal finance audience (rather than a wedding-oriented one) so I’m really glad this is relevant!

 
20.
Guest Icon
Guest
dandylyon

well the two go hand in hand. besides, anecdotal stories are always the most helpful/relevant in life i think.

sorry to nag at all, but i’ still would like to know if your diamond came with a grading report or not? other people i’ve talked to tell me to insist on one and it seems like you were extremely well prepared, so i’d love to know what you did in that regard.

 
1 2 

Leave a Reply


You can also just...

Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Spaniel
more by Mrs. Spaniel (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Spaniel

Visit our sister sites eHarmony
Online Dating
eHarmony Advice
Dating Advice
Project Wedding
Wedding Songs
JustMommies
Pregnancy Calendar

Copyright 2004-2012, Weddingbee.com
 

Find your vendors on Weddingbee

Real reviews from brides in your area!

Favors by Weddingbee

  • Favors by season

Shop Now »

Mrs. Spaniel
Mrs. Spaniel

Mrs. Spaniel, Los Angeles Age and Occupation: 28, Law Student Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Psychologist Wedding Date: March 2010 Venue: Calamigos Ranch About Me: I'm a third-year law student trying to balance graduating with starting my career, keeping up a relationship, and, oh yeah, planning an Old World, multi-cultural, "mountain lodge" wedding for 180 guests! A South Asian Jewish girl getting ready to marry my handsome Catholic Dane, I'm hoping to blend our cultures in our wedding just a bit more gently than by providing samosas as appetizers and offering æbleskiver for dessert. (Although that would also be awesome.)

Boards
Classifieds

Blog Calendar
February 2012
SunMonTueWedThuFriSat
2930311234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
26272829

Weddingbee Bios
Wiki
More