Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Swan
more by Mrs. Swan (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Swan
Mrs. Swan's Picture
Mrs. Swan, New York City Age and Occupation: 31, Legislative Representative Fiance's Age and Occupation: 33, Finance Guy Engagement Date: August 9, 2008 Wedding Date: August 2009 Venue: Battery Gardens About Me: I am an un-crafty but resourceful, Caribbean-born but New York-raised woman who's been known to analyze "Dancing with the Stars" and “So You Think You Can Dance”, buy stinky cheese, and use way too many parentheses. I keep lists for fun, am constantly daydreaming of my next international travel adventure (four continents down, three to go), debating sports (let’s Got Mets/Giants!) and dancing around my apartment to stay sane. I am excited to share our wedding planning journey as I hope to plan a streamlined, personal, and fun wedding with the greatest life partner I could ever imagine, Mr. Swan.
About Mrs. Swan

Engaged Abroad - I Did What?! (Part 1)

November 24th, 2009 @ 5:59 pm by Mrs. Swan

Hello, everyone!

My, how I’ve missed you! I’m in wedding blogging limbo still waiting for our pics to come through from our photographer. It’s definitely hard, but I know that good things come to those who wait.

In the meantime, I thought I would tell you about one of the more fulfilling experiences that I had while I was engaged. Last October, I took a week-long trip by myself to Brazil. I’d never traveled completely by myself internationally before, especially to a country where I didn’t have total command of the language, so on many levels this was a total challenge for me (after a year of college Brazilian Portuguese I have the vocab of an 8 year-old… okay, better make that a 5 year-old.).

I had a different outlook on this trip, though. It was the first time that I would be leaving my future husband at home. I will give Mr. Swan a shout out for being so encouraging and not freaking out when I said that I wanted to a plan a trip by myself to a city that did not necessarily have a reputation for always being super safe (Rio; I went to Salvador, too.). Mr. Swan hears way too much about my wanderlust and has learned to appreciate (for lack of a better word) my independent streak. I so appreciate his confidence in me, and his willingness and ability to let me be me.

After the excitement of getting engaged I stopped myself one day and came to a deep realization: this is it, Swan… you’ve got another person who will be your partner in making decisions (even about things like vacations..uh oh :) ), who may occasionally worry when you walk out the door for the day and for whom you’ll need to do the same.

I’m just letting you know that there’s nothing wrong with that. That is by far the best part of marriage. In a way, I wanted to establish with Mr. Swan that while there was going to be this new, amazing partnership that we were forming, that there could still be this space for me to explore my own interests and challenge myself while still cherishing him. I knew that I wanted to do something fulfilling for me, and only me, before we got married. In the end, this trip to Brazil was about not only satisfying my yearly exploration cravings but also to explore how to be me within this new us.

Anyway, without further ado, here’s a picture of me in Rio:

Engaged Abroad - I Did What?! (Part 1) :  wedding relationships Tdriovi

I will most definitely be recapping my trip, but I thought I’d get the mushy stuff out of the way first. :)

Are/did you do anything just for you as you make the transition into marriage?

Tags: relationships |
advertisement below
Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Swan
more by Mrs. Swan (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Swan

24 Responses to “Engaged Abroad - I Did What?! (Part 1)”

1 2 

1.
Mrs. Penguin
Bee
Mrs. Penguin (message)  3,506 posts, Sugar bee

Mrs. Schwann, I admire your independence! You are one of those people that I’m truly grateful to have met this year. Love this post just like I love you :)

 
2.
markyk
Member
markyk (message)  227 posts, Helper bee

What a great idea. Good for you and welcome back!

 
3.
Member Icon
Member
Osakagrl (message)  761 posts, Busy bee

Hello! loved reading your post!

I myself actually hopped on a plane to Japan by myself for 2 weeks to meet my new in laws! They speak no english and i had to get by on my japanese. it was so good for me to be away from my husband and experience a trip like that : )

 
4.
Mrs. Star
Bee
Mrs. Star (message)  2,057 posts, Buzzing bee

I love this post and the idea that you can still definitely be yourself within the new partnership that is the two of you. And I just love you and the mister together — so adorable! ;)

 
5.
Member Icon
Member
KtobeC (message)  103 posts, Blushing bee

I love this post. I took some time off of work to backpack through Asia and South America with a girlfriend right after we got engaged. People thought I was crazy (the trip was planned before he popped the question in my defense) but it was totally fine for our relationship- he even met up with me for a few weeks in S. America! I’m so happy I did it because I had always wanted to and he was so supportive. I think it’s great to keep your independent side if that’s who you are and support each other in what will make you happy. I missed him like crazy but I wouldn’t take it back for anything.

 
6.
LatteLove
Hostess
LatteLove (message)  5,587 posts, Bee Keeper

Wow, i’m terribly impressed that you went through with something liek this (ti’s something I would dream about and talk about but never have the guts for!)
Amazing. Can’t wait for recaps!

 
7.
jmc
Member
jmc (message)  882 posts, Busy bee

Fantastic! Glad to see you back!

Traveling by yourself can be scary but you feel so proud when you’re done.

 
8.
Miss Nachos
Bee
Miss Nachos (message)  1,733 posts, Bumble bee

Sounds like a wonderful way to transition from single to married life. Kudos to Mr. Swan for his total respect for you and your needs!

 
9.
tea
Member
tea (message)  7,288 posts, Bee Keeper

wow what a bold move! i’d be a little hesitant about going abroad by myself. going to another state? no problem, but a whole new country makes me stop to think for a moment. i hope you’ll share more of your adventure!

 
10.
Mrs. French Bulldog
Bee
Mrs. French Bulldog (message)  7,730 posts, Bee Keeper

This was such a fantastic idea :) I can’t wait to hear all about our trip to Brazil.

 
11.
mountain.bride
Member
mountain.bride (message)  1,046 posts, Bumble bee

I think that’s a fantastic idea. I actually was Mr Swan in our experience though. My fi wanted to return to the UK to visit some friends, and he also found cheap flights to New York (where I’d never even been!) so he went off for a month about halfway through our engagement. It was good for me too - I’d never lived alone and so I did enjoy the challenge of proving I was capable, the way fi enjoyed proving he could travel alone. And while we proved it, we agreed afterwards that we still prefer living and travelling together! He did buy me a Tiffancy necklace in NYC to make up for the fact that he went somewhere brand new without me :)

 
12.
million
Member
million (message)  367 posts, Helper bee

My husband did the same thing. We’re both big travelers so it had more to do with him accomplishing something “epic” before we got married. He and one of his groomsmen did a 14-day hike in remote Siberia, ending with a couple days in beautiful Moscow (where DH almost got arrested for drinking beer in Red Square!). It was an experience that I know he treasures. I think it’s a great thing for anyone to do.

Good on you, Mrs. Swan! Brazil seems like a fabulous country — can’t wait to read your recaps.

 
13.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Swan (message)  1,046 posts, Bumble bee

@Pengy- Awww..thanks, hun! Complete and total ditto. It’s been fun getting know you too! Muah!

@jmc - Yes, I totally agree. It was really rewarding.

@Mrs. Star - Thank you, sweetie!

@KtobeC- I am thoroughly jealous. I’ve never been to Asia before! Mr. S and I are thinking about heading there next year.

@Osakagirl - How exciting!

@mountain.bride - A Tiffany necklace sounds like a great trade-off to me. :)

 
14.
Bee Icon
Bee
Ms Potato Chips (message)  1,193 posts, Bumble bee

Olá! Você a cisne muito bonita! Did I say that right? I’m learning Portuguese. How adventurous of you; I’m having severe wander-lust-envy.

 
15.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Frozen Yogurt (message)  2,685 posts, Sugar bee

Wow Swan, totally envious! I think things like that are so important. I did manage to make it to Boston for some me time in Sept of this year. It was wonderful. Not quite Rio, but still a good trip. :)

 
16.
Member Icon
Member
KMSull (message)  6,442 posts, Bee Keeper

Goodness you are cute! Can’t wait to hear more about your trip! My parents and boy both would absolutely flip their lids if I tried to go on a trip by myself.

 
17.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Moonbeam (message)  1,732 posts, Bumble bee

Oooh I wish I could afford/do that!

 
18.
Mrs. Mouse
Bee
Mrs. Mouse (message)  5,844 posts, Bee Keeper

You are awesome. I can’t wait to see pics!!

 
19.
Guest Icon
Guest
M

Mrs. Swan, you have my heart :) Like you, I am extremely independent and often question if I will be able to still fulfill my passion for travel when I’m married. (Ever since I studied abroad in college, I’ve had the bug ;))

You’ve inspired me!

 
20.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Taffy (message)  3,104 posts, Sugar bee

It sounds like it was an exciting adventure! :)

 
1 2 

Leave a Reply


You can also just...

Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Swan
more by Mrs. Swan (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Swan

Visit our sister sites eHarmony
Online Dating
eHarmony Advice
Dating Advice
Project Wedding
Wedding Songs
JustMommies
Pregnancy Calendar

Copyright 2004-2012, Weddingbee.com
 

Find your vendors on Weddingbee

Real reviews from brides in your area!

Favors by Weddingbee

  • Favors by season

Shop Now »

Mrs. Swan
Mrs. Swan

Mrs. Swan, New York City Age and Occupation: 31, Legislative Representative Fiance's Age and Occupation: 33, Finance Guy Engagement Date: August 9, 2008 Wedding Date: August 2009 Venue: Battery Gardens About Me: I am an un-crafty but resourceful, Caribbean-born but New York-raised woman who's been known to analyze "Dancing with the Stars" and “So You Think You Can Dance”, buy stinky cheese, and use way too many parentheses. I keep lists for fun, am constantly daydreaming of my next international travel adventure (four continents down, three to go), debating sports (let’s Got Mets/Giants!) and dancing around my apartment to stay sane. I am excited to share our wedding planning journey as I hope to plan a streamlined, personal, and fun wedding with the greatest life partner I could ever imagine, Mr. Swan.

Boards
Classifieds

Blog Calendar
February 2012
SunMonTueWedThuFriSat
2930311234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
26272829

Weddingbee Bios
Wiki
More