Register or log in —

Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Miss Pudding
more by Miss Pudding (oldest)
Older blog post by Miss Pudding
Miss Pudding's Picture
Miss Pudding, Greater Toronto Area/Vermont Age and Occupation: 26, High School Teacher Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Computer Engineer Engagement Date: August 2008 Wedding Date: July 2010 Venue: Catholic Ceremony, Cultural Hall Reception About Me: Quite literally a citizen of the world, I was born in Poland, grew up in Canada, and now live in the beautiful state of Vermont. I love reading historical biographies, multi-tasking, teasing my hair, and, despite my height, wearing high heeled shoes. I am the ultimate klutz with an uncanny ability to put on a graceful front. Mr. Pudding and I have been dating for over six years, and are very excited to finally merge our (very large) families. We are planning a traditional Polish-Catholic wedding that is anything but predictable.
About Miss Pudding

Addressing the Dress: An Explanation

November 25th, 2009 @ 2:21 pm by Miss Pudding

Alternate Title: How Growing Up in Communist Poland is Influencing Our Wedding

I am sorry to say that I will not be posting pictures of my dress pre-wedding. The reason for this has nothing to do with wanting to surprise Mr. Pudding - he is so oblivious to clothing that I don’t think he would notice the dress even if I wore it while scrubbing the bathroom. Like the alternate title of my post suggests, it has to do with communist Poland. Huh? What does the political state of a central European country between the years of 1945 to 1989 have to do with my wedding dress? Stay with me, while I explain:

I was born in Poland in 1983. Without giving you a history lesson that would take hours to write (and read), I will just say that Poland in the 1980s was not a very happy place. If you have the interest and the time, you can read all about it here. Basically, the government made sure that anyone who was against communism was interrogated and punished. All it would take was for a neighbor or a (bad) friend to suggest that you were anti-government and you could be in grave danger. As you can imagine, this caused major paranoia. People were afraid to trust anyone outside of the family (or in it for that matter, as children were encouraged to snitch on their parents).

(source)

Umm… again, what does this have to do with my wedding dress?


Well, as my closest friends know, my upbringing in Poland (I lived there until I was 9) has had a huge impact on my life. The fact that my family lived in such an atmosphere has made all of us a little distrustful. I am absolutely convinced that the second I post a picture of my dress, in fact, the second that I breathe a word of my selection to anyone, that person will immediately go out and purchase the exact same dress.

But Miss Pudding, some of your friends are already married!

It doesn’t matter… what if they get divorced and remarried, or decide to renew their vows?

But what about the cousins that are simply too young to be married? Or the friends that are very unlikely to be getting married by next July?

I am sure that those girls would love to wear the same dress that I will be wearing to my wedding.

All very logical, right?

Nevertheless, for now, I will not be posting pictures of my dress here. Perhaps my paranoia will wear off eventually, but honestly, I’m 26 years old and don’t imagine that I will change now.

Are you paranoid about someone “stealing” your dress?

(Just as a side note, I want to say that I poke fun of my childhood often, and it’s simply my way of underlying the irony of how different my life is now than it was then. I hope that any of you out there with similar experiences are not offended by my lighthearted remarks.)

Tags: |   Link for this post | Share this post: retweet Share this post on StumbleUpon  Share this post on Facebook  Digg this post  Add to Kirtsy
Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Miss Pudding
more by Miss Pudding (oldest)
Older blog post by Miss Pudding
advertisement below

24 Responses to “Addressing the Dress: An Explanation”

1.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss French Fries (message)  1,416 posts, Bumble bee

Ummm…I’m a little worried that his friend’s fiancee will choose the same dress that I did (they’re getting married 3 weeks before us).

Logically, I know she won’t choose something like what I did (she strikes me as more of a lace-dress-gal, whereas there isn’t a stitch of lace on mine) but sometimes that logic doesn’t come through!

 
2.
Member Icon
Member
laural (message)  311 posts, Helper bee

I totally understand! A very good friend is wearing a very similar dress as mine and her bridesmaids are in the exact same gold Alfred Angelo dresses that I have picked out. It wouldn’t be a problem except that we live in a REALLY small town. I am so paranoid now to say anything about my wedding for fear that someone will “take” my ideas. Being paranoid makes me crazy!

 
3.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Spaniel (message)  4,443 posts, Honey bee

You are too funny. :) Just as long as we get to see it afterwards!

 
4.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Mouse (message)  5,170 posts, Bee Keeper

Can you at least post a teaser pic, a la Mrs. Beagle? :)

 
5.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Rainbow (message)  1,105 posts, Bumble bee

No, not about my dress, but I’m TOTALLY paranoid about someone stealing my future baby names! I won’t tell ANYONE but my mom, and only cause I KNOW she’s not having any more kids!

 
6.
Member Icon
Member
MichelleMyBell (message)  62 posts, Worker bee

I have a wedding thief that I’m trying to deal with right now. Right after my FH and I announced our engagement my twin sister started bugging her boyfriend to take her ring shopping. They’re engaged now too. She’s my MOH, but I feel like I can’t tell her anything or let her help with planning because every time I mention an idea she decides that she should do it too! :(

 
7.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Labrador (message)  1,465 posts, Bumble bee

@Miss Rainbow: DIDDO!!!

 
8.
KMSull
Member
KMSull (message)  6,140 posts, Bee Keeper

I totally get this and don’t blame you at all! Although I’m not worried about the dress, there are a couple of weird things that I don’t want anyone to steal until I reveal them on my blog/ to friends!

 
9.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Pudding (message)  780 posts, Busy bee

@Mrs. Mouse: A teaser pic is a must!

 
10.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Trail Mix (message)  1,924 posts, Buzzing bee

I’m not really worried about anyone stealing my dress bc it’s fairly un-traditional (Claire Pettibone) and it is definitely for a certain type of wedding…I also don’t really think I would care if someone did end up with the same dress as me, I would just be flattered! (but secretly would probably think that I look better in it, HA!)

 
11.
tea
Member
tea (message)  4,381 posts, Honey bee

i’ve been secretive with my wedding ideas even though most of my friends are married. lol, i don’t know why but i am. you’re not the first bee to wait until after the wedding to show pictures and i’m sure you won’t be the last. we’ll wait!

 
12.
amanda.lynn
Member
amanda.lynn (message)  4,068 posts, Honey bee

I’m totally paranoid about someone stealing my dress too! I’m glad you’re still posting a teaser pic, though!

 
13.
redbullfanatic
Member
redbullfanatic (message)  283 posts, Helper bee

I totally get you. I’m not worried about someone stealing my dress but I’m worried about them saying something nasty about it or giving me some kind of weird look. I’m especially worried about the already married friends who think their wedding dress was THE ULTIMATE wedding dress and anything not like it isn’t as good.

 
14.
Miss Pretzel
Bee
Miss Pretzel (message)  768 posts, Busy bee

I’ve hinted (OK flat out divulged) about where I am getting my dress made, and a little bit of me has irrational worry that someone else will order my dress, but hey I love my seamstress and would be totally psyched if mention of her on a post brought her more business- even if someone does order the exact same dress… but I totally get that gut feeling.

 
15.
Bee Icon
Bee
Ms Potato Chips (message)  863 posts, Busy bee

I’m so interested to hear about your childhood in Poland! Don’t blame you for it at all.

 
16.
Guest Icon
Guest
Elizabeth

Oh my!! I didn’t grow up in Poland and I’m not concerned about my dress but I do know exactly what you mean!! For me, there are certain things (like my ideas for my invitations and vendors especially) that I just don’t want to share until after the big day. I keep thinking of my photographer, for instance, who I have yet to book but am soooo afraid to share with people because I worry that someone else will book my date!!!

Can’t wait to see the pictures though once you do decide to share!! :)

 
17.
million
Member
million (message)  361 posts, Helper bee

Funny, I was sort of the opposite!

I put a lot of my choices and decisions out there with my friends so that I would have claim to them! Anything I didn’t want to share was pretty much because I wanted it to be a surprise.

 
18.
Guest Icon
Guest
Elliemae

For me it was the song..a coworker of mine got married this past june and was having trouble finding a song. So we were out at dinner and DBF called, well she looved the ringtone (ill be by edwin mccain) and wanted to know what it was..i never told her because it’s my DBF’s and my song! LOL…i just kept thinking why can’t you pick a song that has meanign to the both of you?! well.she ended up picking one by Brad Paisly..which suited them perfectly!

 
19.
mander411
Member
mander411 (message)  341 posts, Helper bee

OMG the girl marrying Fi’s brother already is stealing stuff! She got engaged after us but getting married 6 months before. I don’t know if I say my plans/ideas to everyone so this way they KNOW she stole them or to keep my mouth shut??

 
20.
Member Icon
Member
theoneandonlyliz (message)  13 posts, Newbee

A friend of mine is getting married a month before me and bought the dress I had already fallen in love with. Neither of us had any idea until after it was hanging in her closet though. I was a little devastated at first, but now I’m having fun looking at new options. Dress shopping has been more fun than I expected, so I don’t mind prolonging the search :)

 
21.
Guest Icon
Guest
Addressing the Dress: Narrowing the Search | Weddingbee

[...] have talked about the crazy reasons for not wanting to reveal the identity of my dress on the world wide web. But that doesn’t mean [...]

 
22.
Guest Icon
Guest
polka

Zgadzam sie z Toba! In english: I get it!! I experienced that era in Krakow and know what you mean. Thanks for sharing!

 
23.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Buttons (message)  2,658 posts, Sugar bee

That is hilarious! But you aren’t alone…I kind of regret showing some of my friends my dress, because a few of them are getting engaged now and I’m freaking out that they’ll end up in my dress! Hisssss!

 
24.
mandalynn17
Member
mandalynn17 (message)  1,449 posts, Bumble bee

@Miss French Fries: That DID happen with two of my friends (who are also friends with each other) who got married 2 weeks apart in 2007. The copycat friend got married first. It was kinda funny, because we didn’t realize right away because they have such different body types, and then I was finally like, “there is something awfully familiar about that dress.”

Honestly though, even though they definitely shared an item #, the dress looked completely different on them, and accentuated their weddings in different ways. I don’t think having the same dress affected either of their weddings in any way.

 


You can also just...

Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Miss Pudding
more by Miss Pudding (oldest)
Older blog post by Miss Pudding
Visit our sister sites Project Wedding
Wedding Songs
eHarmony Advice
Dating Advice
JustMommies
Pregnancy Calendar
Fertile Thoughts
Infertility Support
Copyright 2004-2010, eHarmony, Inc.
 

Sponsors
Miss Pudding
Miss Pudding Miss Pudding, Greater Toronto Area/Vermont Age and Occupation: 26, High School Teacher Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Computer Engineer Engagement Date: August 2008 Wedding Date: July 2010 Venue: Catholic Ceremony, Cultural Hall Reception About Me: Quite literally a citizen of the world, I was born in Poland, grew up in Canada, and now live in the beautiful state of Vermont. I love reading historical biographies, multi-tasking, teasing my hair, and, despite my height, wearing high heeled shoes. I am the ultimate klutz with an uncanny ability to put on a graceful front. Mr. Pudding and I have been dating for over six years, and are very excited to finally merge our (very large) families. We are planning a traditional Polish-Catholic wedding that is anything but predictable.
Boards
 
Classifieds
 

Blog Calendar
February 2010
SunMonTueWedThuFriSat
31123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28

Weddingbee Bios
Wiki
More