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Mr. Spaniel and I aren’t planning on fully combining our resources right away, but a few weeks before we moved in together this past July, we decided open a joint checking account for mutual expenses like rent, utilities, and groceries. This should have been easy, but between the two of us, we have accounts at six different financial institutions (and that doesn’t include our student loans). His direct deposit goes into one account, which he then writes himself a check to transfer to a different bank, and anything he can save moves into an online savings account… and none of those are with banks that I use! (I know this all sounds ridiculous and like a really easy problem to remedy, but we each use the banks that we use for a reason—or many reasons—and it just isn’t that simple to change!)
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I already have an Electric Orange checking account and Orange Savings with ING Direct, and I think this would be a good bank to open our joint account with because you can link your account to external accounts, which would solve the problem of Mr. Spaniel has of having to write himself a check every month.
It would also make it easy to transfer our monthly throwaway cash to our individual accounts at whichever banks we like. The problem is that we are limited to one checking account there per customer, and I am not getting rid of my personal account there to set up a joint one! So, the search goes on!
Ultimately, we’d like to have joint savings and checking accounts, with smaller individual checking accounts for individual purchases that would be healthier for both of us not to account to the other for. 
Do you have a unique banking situation? How did you end up combining (fully, or partially) your accounts?
Sounds like us! We’re still trying to figure that out. We both have multiple accounts and opened a joint debit account for the wedding, so we’re thinking about just keeping that one as our joint, and hanging on to our individual ones as well. I look at my parents that have a joint checking and joint savings, and that’s it. Not sure I could take that full plunge just yet!
I use (and LOVE) ING for my savings accounts (I love that I can have more than one to earmark certain monies) and for my checking account, and we wanted to do a joint acct with ING but my fiance is on some kind of ING blacklist and is NEVER allowed to have an account with them.
So we have a joint account with Bank of America that is attached to my ING Acct and his Bank of America Acct. We each put a certain amount of money in there a month for our joint expenses, and at the end, any extra goes into our joing savings. It’s worked really well so far, but I honestly think we would have just done the joint checking and no other checking accts if ING would just let him have an acct!!
We just recently combined our finances. While we were in the process of doing so, everyone and their mother warned me against this…not sure why…it just seems that all the women in my life each kept their own separate account so that they could have “mad money” or whatever…I decided against this, and I have to say that money issues have been SO EASY ever since we took the plunge. We make really responsible decisions because we can both see where every penny is going. We have established a savings account which was virtually unheard of before, and if either of us wants to get something that’s not a necessity, we just talk about it and go from there. So far so good. No regrets…no secret cash stashes…it’s all good. 
I feel your pain. We have our joint checking which we use for rent/food etc. and a joint savings account (we are students and put student loan $ in there that is doled out monthly for some of our living expenses) We each have our own accounts at a different bank. We also have a wedding savings account. Then when I took out an auto loan with the credit union we use I had to open another savings account in just my name, so that his name wasn’t on the loan too. I work 3 jobs and each check is directly deposited into different accounts.
It takes me at least 45 minutes every time one of us gets paid to figure out what goes where! Sometimes I wish we could combine everything already. But I know that on our extremely limited budgets we would bicker over how to spend our discretionary income if it was combined. I’m just thankful for on-line banking
Ooh, we’re just dealing with this. We turned one of my ING savings accounts into a joint account, but really need a joint checking because he has a job and I’m a student…before the wedding, I always used loan money but it makes more sense for me not to take out loans next semester since he can comfortably support us. But it’s really hard for me to give up my independence and rely solely on him, and it’s also hard for him to become the “breadwinner,” since I’ve never really asked him for money before. It feels like it should be easier now that we’re married, but it’s not. The good thing is that I’m perfectly willing to give up my individual ING checking and make it a joint account, since I have two other checking accounts and that would just be easiest…but I just haven’t done it and he hasn’t pushed it either. Things would be a helluva lot easier if I had an income, but it just feels like we’re starting out on such unequal footing, financially. Sigh.
We still haven’t combined accounts! Ugh, we need to open a new joint account, but we’ve been putting it off. Maybe after football season . . .
Sara over at 2,000 dollar wedding has a really excellent post on finances here http://2000dollarwedding.com/2008/08/tip-5-how-to-have-successful.html
I recommend all couples have at least 6 accounts: His/hers checking, his/savings, and our checking/savings. I work at a bank and it gets very MESSY! Some couples are great and can handle just a joint account, most can’t. My sister and her husband used to only have a joint account and they drove each other crazy checking in about their day-to-day purchases. I have my own account and if I want Jamba Juice I never have to ask, because it comes from my discretionary money. Each of us contributes a percentage of our salary to our joint accounts and the rest goes into our sole ownership accounts.
You want to also maintain your accounts because let’s face all marriages don’t last forever. I can’t tell you how many husbands/wives have closed out their joint accounts without the other knowing.
I have ING savings as well. Since it’s so easy to wire transfer money to/from ING, we decided we’ll open a joint acct with ING. We’re opening a joint ING savings account for “do-not-touch-unless-necessary” and another for vacation and monthly expenses. We’re keeping our individual checking and savings accounts.
I’ve been added to my fiance’s checking (though I haven’t once used the debit or deposited money..) and we started a joint credit card.
I was all about combining finances until I looked at my statement one day and felt just a little self-conscious about my spending habits. Putting that all out in the open is scary, but realizing that we have financial goals like a down payment eventually for a house means that we need accountability in our spending. So one single checking account is the goal…soon.
This has been a process for us. First, we had only separate accounts. Recently, we combined “some” of our finances into a joint account to pay living expenses, but we each maintain our own accounts too-its just easier that way for now. After we get married, we will probably combine all of our $$$…at least I think so. ;-D I kind of like the idea of keeping a little to myself for my shoes/handbag habit.
Here’s oure (or my?) plan: By this time next year we will have a total of 5-6 accounts between us, at the same bank where our mortgage is. This way we can transfer money back and forth easily.
Account 1 will be a joint checking where both of our paychecks get automatically deposited. From this account we’ll pay the mortgage (about a 60/40 split since he makes more than I do), insurance, and any other joint bills. From this account we will also transfer to our individual checking accounts a certain amount of money to cover individual bills (grad school loans for me) and fun money. Also from joint checking we’ll transfer to joint savings for things like new vehicles, vacations, etc.
But we’ll each have an individual checking for sure, and I’ll also have an individual savings too (I don’t care if he does or doesn’t have an individual savings…).
It sounds complicated, but I think that with setting up autotransfers and things like that, it *should* work for us. I’m just not comfortable with total joint money, and feel like every woman should have cash to fall back on in case of emergency!
I work at a bank - and my checking account is here - I have a savings with ING, as well!
CW, on the other hand, doesn’t use banks. Seriously. His whole family carries around cash. Some of the members (mom and dad) store money in the bank occasionally - but they usually have fat wallets, too!
So - we’ll be opening a joint account at the bank I work at. it just make sense for us right now.
We definitely were in that boat but since getting together/engagement we both worked on moving our own personal accounts to the same banks. So now, we each have our own ING and USAA and we have a shared account at a local credit union. Thankfully, when we get married ING and USAA said joining our accounts will be really easy. So this way I can keep my current accounts under my name and when we’re married it’ll be an easy switch!
We’ve been discussing this. I think we are going to make my ING savings account into a joint account and maybe also make my Chuck interest yielding checking account into a joint account also. We discussed having a set amount each month go into “play accounts” for each of us. We’d like to keep these accounts small so we are having regular conversations about large purchases.
For the time being we are trying to reconcile our different approaches to monthly spending- I pay for everything on debit- he pays for everything on credit- then pays the whole credit bill at the end of the month.
I am a big-old-no-last-name-changing feminist who always believed that separate accounts were the way to go. But before we got married I did a lot of reading about it and started thinking that if we can’t share money, how are we going to share caring for the children and making other compromises? Legally, the money belongs to both of you so you might as well keep things simple and put it all in one place. It helps that I manage our finances and pay the bills (because I’m more organized), but so far we’re both really happy with shared accounts.
You know, I was thinking “Man, 6 accounts? That sounds like ALOT!” But then I realized that I have 3 personal ones, and then we’ll open a 4th one for the wedding. Mr. KM has 2, so there’s 6 right there. Plus whatever joint one we end up using for household bills… that’s 7.
@Miss Nachos, @Ms. Mojito: I always think a little bit of financial privacy is healthy! I know he goes out to eat too often, and he knows I am a sucker for designer jeans when they go on sale at Gilt or Rue La La ;)… but it would be bad for both of us if we had to ask each other for permission each time, as long as neither of us is going totally out of control. Right now we are thinking that we’ll go onto an “allowance” system for fun money, keep our retirement accounts separate, and combine all the rest.
@eholden: That sounds awful! It’s also funny… when you’re on a very limited budget, combining is very difficult… it also makes it harder to keep finances separate! Who knew; less money = harder, however you manage it! 
@HL: We’re in a very similar boat. I’m work a little, but I’m still in school and my income is pretty limited. If we account too carefully for who is paying for what, I’ll feel like I’m not doing my share… even though I’m working my butt off!
@the introitus: Thanks, that was very helpful!
@makhro82: Our eventual plan is pretty similar to what you posted, although we are going to try to send money into the joint first and funnel it equally into the separate accounts. Since he works for himself (income is not 100% consistent) and we’re not sure what I’ll be doing for a living next year, we want to make sure we create a policy of shared money first so that neither partner is left dry.
@KMSull: They totally add up!
I would like to respond to everyone, but I’m getting tired now. Thanks for all of your insights! I’m glad we’re not the only one having a little bit of trouble figuring out the logistics of merging money. It doesn’t bother me at all in theory… but man, is it a hassle!
When we moved in together, we opened a joint account and we each transfer money into it to cover our joint expenses. Once we’re married we plan on keeping our separate accounts, but we will make most of our expenses joint expenses and only keep a small percentage in our individual accounts.
FI just tried to move his personal account to ING and got the shocking news that they won’t let any person have more than one electric orange checking account, so you may run into trouble with that plan.
We eTrade’d it. We each had eTrade savings accounts before that we didn’t really use (like the super backup savings accounts) and separate checking accounts at separate institutions. What we did is set up a joint eTrade checking and we each transfer a set amount into it from our separate checking accounts. That way I don’t have to see his random internet purchases and he doesn’t have to know how much I spend on Christmas. I really love eTrade because you can transfer from external accounts via eTrade (so I can make eTrade transfer money from my checking account). It works really remarkably well.
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Mrs. Spaniel, Los Angeles Age and Occupation: 28, Law Student Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Psychologist Wedding Date: March 2010 Venue: Calamigos Ranch About Me: I'm a third-year law student trying to balance graduating with starting my career, keeping up a relationship, and, oh yeah, planning an Old World, multi-cultural, "mountain lodge" wedding for 180 guests! A South Asian Jewish girl getting ready to marry my handsome Catholic Dane, I'm hoping to blend our cultures in our wedding just a bit more gently than by providing samosas as appetizers and offering æbleskiver for dessert. (Although that would also be awesome.)
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