Weddingbee Blog

Something that has surprised me, and continues to surprise me is how freaking difficult making a guest list is. I thought it would be a 3-hour session, everybody sitting around a table a la Father of the Bride, and we’d be finished. (Damn that movie.) It didn’t even occur to me that we would be working on it for at least 3 months. It’s still even in the really, really, really, really raw stages. Not getting down to the “Who lives where, with whom, etc.” stuff. Not even to the plus-one issue. I even have a folder dedicated to the guest list on my desktop. That’s just sad.

I think that when anybody gets engaged, there should be a packet. There needs to be a packet that says stuff like:

1. If you’re planning a June wedding, you’re already behind. Go, go, go.
2. There is a good possibility that your brain will turn into Swiss cheese.
3. There is also the possibility that you will become the most annoying person you know, or better yet, be obsessively neurotic about becoming the most annoying person you know.
4. Making the guest list will be the biggest bane of your existence. That is, until you either:
   a. invite everyone.
   b. invite no-one.
   c. are committed to an asylum.

And so on and so forth.

I just can’t figure out how to not piss people off, have everyone we love there, understand the rules for inviting old BFFs, or just how in the h-e-double-hockey-sticks to do it. I’ve read the “If you haven’t talked to the person in 6 months, cut them” rule. I’ve heard the “No ring, no bring” rule, though that one goes into the plus-one category, which I’m not even touching yet. This is one time where I’d love some rules. Concrete rules. No-exceptions-to-the-rule rules. Unfortunately, I don’t think said rules exist. I’ll just keep trying to play “Pin the tail on the guest” until it’s all finished. Or get stuck in a nuthouse.

Is it normal to have this much trouble making a guest list? Am I missing the boat somewhere? A memo, perhaps?