Weddingbee Blog

I really love New Year’s resolutions. I do. And I’m good at following up on them. I’m not good at following up with most things, so this resolution follow-up is really quite impressive. The trick for me is to devise small, manageable changes.

Last year’s was “Eat breakfast before leaving the house in the morning.” Check!

The year before: “Blog more.” BIG check!

This year… well, there is a whole lot that I’d like to change (the Cliff Notes version: managing stress, navigating my grad school-induced anxiety, waking up earlier, cook more, etc. etc.). But one concrete resolution starts with my nails.

Yes, it does! Starts with my nails. My nails are terrible. I’m not a nail-biter. It’s just that my nails and I lead completely disparate existences. I ignore them, they ignore me. In return, when I happen to look down at them, I might notice ragged edges, dry cuticles, inconsistent shapes. I rarely paint them, I sure as hell don’t file them, and I’ve gotten maybe 3 manicures in my life. In a list of priorities, my nails are at the very very bottom. The bottom of the bottom. Not to mention they’re a terrible canvas to showcase my beautiful ring.

I noticed this, more specifically, on Christmas Eve, during a midnight mass, where I looked around me and started to notice—really notice—people’s nails. And I found, with some alarm, that other people in the world do take time to file, trim, even polish.

Because it’s not just nails, you see. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that my messy nails were a sign of a growing problem, which is kinda hard to admit and even harder to type but here it is: I really gave up on my appearance this year. No, really, I did. You don’t have to be nice about it. I did. It was a gradual change: I worked in an office last winter (and offices have this tendency to gray my pallor and make me wear a lot of linty black), and was overly anxious about grad school acceptances, so I didn’t care as much about makeup or blow-drying my hair. Then it was summer, and I had surgery and was a lay-about for a month. Then school, and stress, and God knows no money for new clothes or refreshed makeup. Add an inconsistent sleep schedule and less time working out… you get one hot mess.

I didn’t so much as “let myself go” as I went through the motions, slapping on some concealer, throwing my hair into a messy bun. I thought, ‘Who cares?’ and ‘I don’t have time for this!’ By the time December rolled around and my papers were done, I figured I could spruce myself up again if I wanted to. And I tried. I went out with friends one night and it felt good to straighten my hair, put on makeup and jewelry… I thought, ‘See, now I have time, so back to my old self!’ But it wasn’t so easy as that! I still had dark circles under my eyes, limp hair, a general fleshiness about the edges. A year’s worth of non-grooming could not be undone in one day.

Which, of course, led me to think about the Big Special Day looming ahead of me. I can see myself falling into the same bad patterns this semester and I can easily picture looking at wedding photos that show one overly tired, haggard-looking Chip. I feel very Scrooge being visited by the Ghost-of-Appearances-Past: This is the future if you don’t change your ways!!! Ahhh, I’ll change, I promise I’ll change!!

So it starts with my nails. I splurged, a whopping $35, on some cuticle stuff, 4 new polish colors, Emory boards, and cuticle sticks. I used a Lush gift certificate for some Lemony Flutter, which is thick and buttery and indulgent and amazing.

Source

And with the nails comes the rest: a few new clothes for the next semester, maybe even some more makeup… and a resolve to take the time in the morning to actually care about what my hair looks like. Dress up a little bit on Sundays. And I think this will be a good starting point and a place to begin with changing all that other stuff. I think I’ll gain back something—that joie de vivre, that confidence, that can-do attitude—that I’ve found myself lacking in this past year. And by the time the wedding comes, I’ll look fresh-to-death and revived and rejuvenated, and I’ll feel that way, too.

Does anyone else feel this way? Did you make any beauty-related resolutions?