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I just emailed my mom some PDFs of our invitation drafts, which included the ceremony card and reception card. She commented that our names were awfully large and she didn’t know what “twirling and swirling to follow” meant.
Well… I take it quite personally whenever this lady criticizes me (huge character flaw, I get it). But when she dislikes my print design, holy moly.
If someone doesn’t get twirling and swirling, they can look at the next card and realize there’s a reception following the ceremony! And if someone is offended by 20 pt names, well, why would anyone be offended by 20 pt names?
Sure, I could just give in and print “reception to follow” and make our names teensy because they’re too obnoxious or whatever. BUT I DON’T WANT TO.
I have a vision.
Maybe it seems a little wacky to my parents, but I promise once things are printed they will get it. I just wish I had a little more support sometimes. This isn’t to say I’m ungrateful for the help they’ve given me, I just want a little more faith in what we’re planning.
Do members of your family have strong opinions about your wedding plans? What do you do about it?
“I have a vision”
Hahaha… I love that statement so much, mostly because it is the same thing I keep telling MY mother every time she questions the decisions that I’ve made.
AHHH I wish my mom got my “vision” but we are on two totally different pages right now! I could have written this post after this weekend. I tried to tell my mom that I was thinking we could decorate the space for the rehearsal dinner in a different “theme” then the actual reception and she just shot it right down saying I was being difficult! We are having a BBQ rehearsal dinner, how cute would that be to decorate for and not any harder than any other type of decorating!
My mom does that some times! She can completely suck the wind out of my sails! Such a poo feeling…Just tell her that what she said hurt your feelings and that it was something you worked on and had invisioned for a while!
My mom, for the most part, is very laid back about the wedding. But sometimes, she gets all bent out of shape about little stuff.
Like, we told her that we were having an iPod reception with no dj or emcee and she was like “But you HAVE to have someone! Who is going to announce you at the reception?”
Um. Nobody. Everyone knows who we are. They’re invited to our wedding for chrissakes.
“And how are they going to know when to eat?”
Well, when they see the caterers bring the food out, they’ll know that they can eat it.
Or when I showed her the shoes I was thinking about wearing: http://www.zappos.com/images/z/8/8/1/881401-p-MULTIVIEW.jpg?
“You can’t wear those! The heel isn’t fancy enough!”
A. Nobody is going to see the heel under my long dress.
B. I am getting married on a lawn. I ain’t wearin’ stilettos, ma!
Anyway, I think you should just stand up for yourself. I love the “twirling and swirling” idea!
haha yeah. while my family don’t give strong opinions but they do give them and if I don’t like them, sometimes I just say “ok” and pretend I didn’t ask them 
Er… I did nothing and just took it personally. Then blew up at my mom last week when asked when my wedding was again (it’s 4 months away, what do you mean you don’t know the date?!!!). I did the totally immature thing and brought up every critical comment she has made since I got engaged and maybe through in how she has “a lot of comments for someone who isn’t contributing anything.”
My advice, just talk about how you feel and that her comments are starting to take a toll. Don’t bottle it up or you will explode!
Awww don’t take it personally. She is just trying to help you. My mom is the same way. She means the best and just gives her honest opinion. I always keep in mind though that we are of two different generations and our ideas will differ.
Sigh . . . unfortunately opinions are as common as butt holes, everybody has one. Honestly, I stopped asking people what they thought and instead said, “This is what we decided.”
I huff and puff to Mr. Sew when this sort of thing happens! And then I make it a point not to ask for anyone’s opinions on things that are “finalized” already in my mind
I do the same thing with my Mom! Not just about wedding, but about everything! The advice to be straight with her and talk about it sounds good - I’ll have to try that myself!
The Mr and I decided to have a cruise wedding since we have to foot the entire wedding bill ourselves. My parents-who are not contributing financially-have the most to say about our decision. It sucks not to have family support but I know that in the end we are doing what will make is happy! It’s our big day and we are entitled to have everything just as we want it. If someone doesn’t like it, they can just not come.
aw, i’m sorry about the lack of support on the invite front. i like the “twirling and swirling” comment–very chic.
Oh, Ribbons, welcome to my world! It sure seems like a lot of wedding planning can be an uphill battle. I definitely have places where I’m willing to bend, and others that I feel very firmly about. If your heart is set on 20 pt names, go for it!
My mum and FMIL both have strong opinions, however, i’ve been eating and drinking weddings for several years now and it’s difficult to sway me. They mean well but I passed the stage of “what about…” a year ago
Go with your vision cos it rocks and if people don’t get it, they’ll just need to call you up and it’s an excuse for a chat!
I completely understand…haha. My mom is my biggest supporter and my biggest detractor. We have completely different aesthetic tastes and she has openly stated that she doesn’t like any of the design choices we’ve made for the wedding so far, although, in her words “it’s your wedding, so I’ll stay out of it.” It sucks! I wish she could at least appreciate the choices even if they’re not what she’d pick for herself. Her opinions always make me second guess myself.
Hahahahahahhahaha… oh, strong family opinions. That’s all I’m going to say about that.
I can’t wait to see your invitations, by the way. 
I get ya! M dad is the biggest bridezilla ever! He has something to say about everything!
I’m sooo with you here! I went through this with my dad over our decision not to have the ceremony in a church. It was so bad, he threatened not to come. But soon.. after a talking to from my mom (who wanted the church ceremony too but still supported us) and his sister, he told us it’s our choice to make and he’ll be there.
It’s definitely tough to not take opinions from parents to heart. But we have to realize we’re adults and it’s our choice to make.
That sucks. I have to say that my mom didn’t exactly get it at first, either. But the more I shared with her, she started to understand what I wanted for the wedding and why, and she really came around. I hope yours does, too!
I know the feeling! I might tell her to print out the PDF as on screen stuff can look huge and printed it will look totally reasonable.
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Mrs. Ribbons, Washington D.C./Bloomington, IN Age and Occupation: 23, Research Associate for an international development firm Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Proposal Coordinator for contractor Engagement Date: May 2, 2008 Wedding Date: June 2010 Venue: Indiana Memorial Union About Me: I'm an Indiana transplant living in DC with my fiance and our pretty kitty. I enjoy the color pink, I'm obsessed with the Dior New Look and tulle, and I heart my level 80 paladin. I'm a sucker for bad TV, literary theory, and cakes of all persuasion. I also happen to be marrying the cutest closet nerd around! It's all about Bloomington for us because it's where we met -- on the college paper. If there's a theme for our small summertime wedding, it's Dior meets Dorothy Draper on a lark in Bloomington; think poofy, plus graphic prints, bold colors, and a whole lot of prettiness.
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