Weddingbee Blog

No, I’m not talking about an alarm clock or a wedding countdown clock… I’m talking about my biological clock.

source

(huge shout out to BM Talls)

So my biological clock isn’t actually ticking (like this! ) - I’m only 25 (OK, OK, going on 26), but for some reason, lately I have baby fever… and I’ve got it bad.

(OMG so cute!)

The month that I just finished in the Peds ED didn’t help… just sayin’.

You see, I have always had that feeling… that the one thing I was really destined to be was a mother. Not that I’m not super excited about my future career - I just do not intend to let my career define me. Call me old fashioned, but I would really like to be defined by my family - as a wife, a daughter, a sister, and someday, a mother.

Not only would I like to be a mother once, I’d like to be a mother a few times over! I came from a family of three siblings as did Burger, and we’d both like at least that many kids, if not more. And if that’s not in the stars for us to accomplish naturally, we plan to adopt.

When to start having children is something we actually started discussing awhile ago. Burger is so sweet, in that he defers to me on when to start trying. Not that he doesn’t care - he does, but he has always said that it’s my body, and that I should be the one deciding when a baby is going to move in.

That being said, since we are both going to be starting residency within the year, ideal child bearing years are far, far off.

But what defines ideal child bearing years, you know?

Obviously, time is a big issue for us - we’ll both be working upwards of 80 hours/week as residents (but hopefully, fingers crossed, depending on the fields we end up in we won’t be!). I could see if one parent was working that much, but both? Is that even fair to our child? But then, when I think about delaying having kids until after residency, I remember that life as an attending physician isn’t always much better (again - hopefully, fingers crossed it will be!). I will never be able to not work (I’m not complaining - I know a lot of ladies can’t stop working), though I would really love to, but I am hopeful that I will be able to work part-time. Then, there IS my biological clock! Which, though it’s not ticking quite yet, it probably will be if I wait until residency is over when I will be 30 or 31.

The next thing to consider is money. Currently, we live off of student loans. Monopoly Money as I call it. It’s very surreal and would probably be irresponsible to procreate on the government’s dime! Once we’re real grown-ups getting real paychecks in a year, things will be different right? Well, not too much. We’ll be making lower salaries for the first four-ish years of training (with enormous loan payments to deal with each month), and we will probably continue to just get by. But, once that time period has passed, we will make full salaries and eventually - eventually - we will dig out from under the debt. My mom has always said that you can make a baby work regardless of money, and I tend to agree - so money doesn’t play as much into my equation, but it does for Burger. He is always the more level-headed one when it comes to finances, and obviously swinging a baby will be more difficult than easy financially at any point for the next few years.

And finally, we’ve got to think about us. Are we ready to expand our family? To become parents? Are we physically equipped to provide for children (as I write in our one room loft apartment and think, “Nope!”)? Have we taken enough time to enjoy each other, being husband and wife?

There are so, so, so many things to consider when it comes to babies. While I doubt we will be having kids anytime in the next year, after that, things are just too far off for me to be sure. What we do know is that we believe that children are gifts from God, and that when we make plans, God laughs! When He knows that we’re ready, we will be thrilled to start on our new adventure!

Do you have baby fever? When do you think “the right time” will be for you and your SO?